just a thought. sorry if its a little wordy!

[Anita Lynn]

Almost didn't post this, don't want anyone to feel like I'm talking about them... I'm not, I'm talking about me.
After reading the post “did you get my message” I’ve been thinking a lot about how people present themselves.
The first thing that came to mind was a young woman I saw last year. As tall as I am, young and tall, wow was she tall.
She was wearing a dress that came to about mid calf, long and flowing. The male part of me said “WOW”!, the Anita part of me said “where can I find that dress”!
The thing that was so attractive about her was the way she walked, with confidence! With a purpose.
Today while shopping I saw 2 other young ladies, one wore tights and a skirt and a sweater over a blouse, once again she walked with confidence, not like she was on a mission, but like she knew what she wanted. When she spoke it was polite and sweet, not like she came from a street gang.
The other one was wearing tights and a cardigan with boots, very well put together.
What these three had in common was that they were not dressed to “tease”, and seemed to be self confident. What I saw were young ladies that wanted to be treated like ladies and not objects. Like they wanted to be respected for who they were and not what they were.
In the same store I saw quite a few ladies that had the appearance that they didn’t care about how they looked and what anyone else thought, which is fine. Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with that.
What I took from these three ladies is this: I want to exude the same confidence, in girl mode and boy mode. With a little respect and dignity.

Anita

[Jaymees22]

Hi, I think you're right a little confidence can go a long way in any situation. I'm not overly confident in male or female mode, but I'm a lot better than I used to be. I remember the other post about presenting as female which we all do, but then it got into a big discussion on passing. Hugs Jaymee

[Bria]

Anita, I think you hit the nail on the head! When you are confident and comfortable with who you are and what you are doing, it shows. I have noticed that when I shop for Bria in boy mode, if I walk in confidently and go about my business, no one pays any unusual attention. If you go any place and are looking around at others to see if they are reacting to you, that is when you attract attention. Dress nicely, act confident, and go about your business. Hugs Bria

[Rachelakld]

I tell my apprentices and all my electronic techs, If your going to blow something up, do it with confidence.
Tell my kids, if they are going to screw up, do it with confidence.
The attitude, becomes the habit, becomes the lifestyle.

[Jorja]

Copy their style and confidence and you will go far.

[Justine Dawn]

Hi Rachel,
I just want to say:
- I love your attitude
- I love your look
- I love NZ!

[Marcelle]

Hi Anita,

You are correct . . . presentation (how you are dressed, make-up, etc.) is only half the equation. Confidence is what gets you by when you are out and about. I learned through trial and error if you blend but act like you belong, nobody pays you much attention.

Hugs

Isha

[Tracii G]

Dress nice, stylish casual if you want.Nice hair and make up.
Where ever you go act like you belong there because you do.
Don't act afraid and no one will bat an eye.

[lingerieLiz]

Agreed, women who are confident about themselves exude a sense of presence as do men. I know that if I'm out and feel comfortable with my looks I interact with people much different and much more readily accepted.

[RenneB]

I agree that (at least in my neck of the woods) very few people both male and female, dress with any kind of thought other than what was on the top of the laundry heap. Those that have respect for themselves and the way they look tend to stand out. There are those few that can manage to have style and just blend into the background. I strive for the latter.

Looking back, the think I needed most to go out and about was a positive attitude. Once I had that, the rest (hair, makeup, shape, etc.) just followed. I still tend to dress one step up from the crowd.... just can't seem to lower myself to the flip flops, pajama bottoms and sweat shirt....

Renne.....

[LaraPeterson]

Renne, I'm with you. I don't know if it's "one step up," but I certainly do enjoy a nice dress, hose and heels when I go out. Whether presenting sexy or conservative--or both--feeling good in your own skin makes the whole idea a lot easier.

[Beverley Sims]

One thing about confidence,it is good to have it but when you go out go out with a goal in mind as well.
Go somewhere, visiting the park looking at something.

Think about some early times out.
You went out the front door without an objective.
You wandered around the streets aimlessly for about 20 minutes....
That's enough.... Back home now.
"That is not a goal."

Set a goal and confidence follows naturally.

[carhill2mn]

Your intersting post is a good reminder of how important and appealing a self-confident attitude is. A good reminder for girls who are venturing out in public.