"I was BORN this way".

[Wildaboutheels]

The title is often mentioned/expressed here at this Forum. 4 Qs.

1] When did you first CD and if it was "at a very early age" is that part of the reason maybe?

2] Are there folks who started much later - perhaps in their teens even - who also feel they were born this way?

3] Anyone who started "very early" NOT feel you were born that way?

4] What are the odds that many young kids, both boys and girls, tried on their parents or siblings clothes?

No doubt about it, Many here were born into the "wrong body". But for others, it looks like that phrase is often tossed out as a "reason or excuse". CDing is not against the law. No reason or excuse is needed is it? I sure hope no one here thinks they could even come close to guessing accurately the number of men who actually CD? Maybe it's just mantyhose during the winter months or full time underdressing. In the grand scheme of things, does the actual # even matter?

[tiffanynjcd24]

1) I was about 13 years old and it was a early age and I feel that I was born this way
2) and 3) see 1)

[Beverley Sims]

1] When did you first CD and if it was "at a very early age" is that part of the reason maybe?
Just a fascination for dressing up and finding an alternate persona.

I was also a prince who drove a train. when I was about eight or nine.
God knows where I drove it to!

2] Are there folks who started much later - perhaps in their teens even - who also feel they were born this way?
Not applicable to me.

3] Anyone who started "very early" NOT feel you were born that way?
Q1 answers that.

4] What are the odds that many young kids, both boys and girls, tried on their parents or siblings clothes?
I would say it is a regular occurrence.
Part of the regimen of dressup.

[Lucy_Bella]

1] When did you first CD and if it was "at a very early age" is that part of the reason maybe?

One of my very first memories are of CDing ..I believe it could be at least part of the reason..

2] Are there folks who started much later - perhaps in their teens even - who also feel they were born this way?

My CDing was in spurts up until recently has never been a steady part of my life..

3] Anyone who started "very early" NOT feel you were born that way?

I really have no reason to think I was born this way.. I do not dress to fill a void in my bio gender... I do not believe people are born with a fetish for certain material and clothing....

4] What are the odds that many young kids, both boys and girls, tried on their parents or siblings clothes?

I consider myself "average" and if I have done it I would say the odds are pretty high 1 in 3 maybe..

" CDing is not against the law."

No it's perfectly legal but lets try to understand what type of CDing is " legal "..Mine would be under dressing or in private, other than that it's against law..

[Confucius]

My theory is that cross-dressing is a form of synesthesia. When you are an infant your brain is going through a critical period where neural connections are being made at a rapid pace. In fact your brain has the most neural connections when you are 12 months old. Then you go through a learning process where connections are reinforced or pruned. There is a second critical period of synaptogenesis when you hit puberty - more neural connections are made and then pruned through the learning process. I understand that about 75% of cross-dressers have their first experience in early childhood, and about 25% of cross-dressers have their first experience in puberty/early adulthood.

In this sense the vast majority of cross-dressers are just normal, healthy, heterosexual males with one extra connection hardwired in their brains. This extra connection means that one sensory pathway (feel of feminine clothes) produces an automatic, involuntary, response in a secondary sensory pathway which causes the release of dopamine and other neurotransmitters which produce the sensations of well-being, pleasure, sexual gratification and bonding.

There is a whole spectrum of sensations a cross-dresser can feel. It would be interesting to conduct a survey to determine which sensations are the most common. However, I believe that the majority of cross-dressers do NOT believe they were born in "wrong body". My guess is that the most common sensations from cross-dressing is that of being contact with an actual female.

[Eryn]

I was "born this way" but managed to suppress it very well.

The interest was there, I experimented a bit now and then with individual feminine items, but never put it all together until I was in my '50s.

[Katey888]

I agree Wild,
While Confucius may have something in the theory of early months/years development, for those of us afflicted/ blessed at an early age (my memory says somewhere around 6-7 years old when I remember doing stuff - it may easily have happened before), we might just as well have been born with it. What I don't understand, Confucius, is why this neural pathway is just the feel of feminine clothes - couldn't it as easily be: a rough woollen blanket? a wicker basket? a vinyl floor? Why aren't there equivalent groups who are just as switched on to other tactile triggers?
Kateyx

[LilSissyStevie]

I didn't know the difference between boys and girls until someone pointed it out to me. When it was, I thought I'd rather be a girl. I doubt that gender identity is innate. But I do think that we have innate characteristics that may be congruent or incongruent with socially constructed notions of gender. I just never felt the way I thought a boy should feel. That led to a lot of confusion. But I've mostly made peace with the idea that my gender doesn't have to "match" my sex.

[Steph_CD_62]

1) I started in my 20's not exactly sure when, however I did discover the lingerie section in catalogs when I was around 8, and in my teens women dressed in lingerie excited me more than naked ones.
2) Can't say I feel I was born this way....... but again why else do I dress?
3) See above
4) I did try on my mom's clothing but didn't feel like I was a crossdresser.

[GretchenJ]

1] When did you first CD and if it was "at a very early age" is that part of the reason maybe?

Started wearing women's clothes (a single item) at about 3rd grade - so about 8 yrs old.

2] Are there folks who started much later - perhaps in their teens even - who also feel they were born this way?
N/A

3] Anyone who started "very early" NOT feel you were born that way?
No - I firmly believe that I born this way.

4] What are the odds that many young kids, both boys and girls, tried on their parents or siblings clothes?
Yes

[Candice Mae]

I started wearing bras at eleven, needed to wear one as I was developing. I can't say that I was born this way, but this is definitely who I am.

[Janice An]

Very simply I had to have been born this way. At 5 or 6 years old is to young to make rational well thought out decisions.

At that age with my parents while they were shopping, I would be looking at girls shoes wishing I could wear them instead of boys shoes. That came from deep inside me and no where else.

[stephNE]

I started at about age 5. I would slip on my mothers bras and panties, usually overtop my boy clothes, and go off to my room and play.

[linda allen]

My mother wanted a daughter and I found out recently (she is long gone) that she dressed me as a girl when I was too young to know the difference. She also used me as a model for dresses she sewed for her nieces (at about age 5) and I remember that.

I wasn't "born this way", in the womb we know nothing about gender, sex, or clothing. These are things we learn from others once we enter the world.

If I had to guess why I crossdress, my guess would be that it's some subconscious desire to be the daughter my mother really wanted. On a conscious level, I wouldn't do that.

[kimdl93]

As I noted in another recent thread, it's been demonstrated that what we call memory is an amalgam of what actually happened and filler applied by the brain to create a more complete mental image. These recollections are, by themselves, incredibly unreliable representations of the past. My own recollections of feeling different at an early age are snippets of emotions and images. The message as I recall it, confirmed to some extent by family members, was of feeling different even at the age of three....and learning to suppress or hide the behaviors that attracted unwanted attention.

Hardly solid proof.... These early recollections and the implication of developmental origins are in themselves speculation really and nothing more.

[Ressie]

1. Started at an early age. Maybe earlier than I can recall?
2. N/A 3. N/A
4. Who knows? No one. It's a matter of curiosity. The thought enters the mind for some boys somehow. Do some boys have the curious thought but decide not to act on it? Maybe the thought never occurs to other boys?

I've never used the expression "I was born this way", but maybe I was. There's no scientific proof either way. I believe I was influenced by my older sister to try on girl's clothes.
Why? There's a good chance that my mom or older sister dressed me in a few female garments. OK, imagine a 3 year old boy in his 6 year old sister's bedroom. Girls like to dress up dolls, why not dress up the baby? I believe repressed memories come out later on and the curiosity comes back. Why did I have to know what it would feel like to try on a dress at age 12?

It's interesting to ponder, but I don't know if I was born this way or if the cause is rooted in early childhood events.

[Rachael Leigh]

My CD beginnings started prob early teens did very little actual dressing much before my late teens.
I've been up and down about this choice I made for a long time.
What I have accepted is I don't know how to stop these feelings of enjoying the look and feel of womens attire so Ive tried to just live with it.
Now I think for everyone we are all born male and female and those who feel that their genitalia don't match their thoughts is always confused me. Just as my thoughts on the clothing choices I make has.
You may choose to match yourselves at some point thru surgery and that still becomes a choice and I can imagine a very hard one.
Every aspect of who we are here is difficult to deal with and it causes much grief and hardship for many, just read thru the threads.
I for one will never believe I was born this way but for whatever reason I made choices to be comfortable with myself and how it made me feel.

[Zylia]

I (think I) agree with LilSissyStevie on the innateness of gender identity and certain gender characteristics, that is: I don't think gender identities are innate, unlike certain gender characteristics (or rather biological sex characteristics). The need or desire to present myself as the opposite gender certainly wasn't innate. Perhaps there was something in me that made me more susceptible to it, that's hard to say.

So no, I started young, but I wouldn't say I was BORN a cross-dresser, but perhaps I was born with a susceptibility for a 'gender identity disorder'.

[Hell on Heels]

Born this way for sure. Grew up in a very rural part of Wi., corn fields and dairy farms.
No outside influence that I can think of to create the need to crossdress. I started around
the age of 7 or 8. Wearing moms bras and nylons. I remember my brother catching me wearing
some nylons and immediately running to mom to tell her what I was up to.I heard her tell him that it was OK
and that maybe I just wanted to know what it felt like to be a girl. Oh if she only knew where that would lead.
Much love,
Kristyn

[lovetobedani]

I started dressing when I was about 13 but remember as far back as when I was about 4 playing with my mothers bra. I have to say that I was born this way because at a very young age I wondered if I would grow up looking like my mother.

Since most of us are pretty much closeted at a young age I'm sure that there are more like us out there than not. As far as little girls go. Remember that it's acceptable for GG's at any age to wear male clothing so I'm not sure that it's concidered crossdressing.

[Angie G]

I started at about age 10 give or take. My DAD dressed I seen him one time in a slip. So I think I was born that way. I would try on family members things mom's aunt's and wrere ever I could. So yes I do think I wea born this way.:hugs:
Angie

[Tina_gm]

The first time I actually tried on women's clothing I was 23. Until the age of 48, I probably tried on women's clothing maybe a dozen times total. A whole lot of suppression and denial going on. I first got the urge to when I was 17. Looking back I would say that I was born this way. I always had more feminine mannerisms and certain character traits, feelings, thoughts looking back before 17. I have tried just about everything over the course of 30 years to rid myself of it. I had a closer bond with my father than mother. No sisters, hardly any female contact to speak of that would make me feel more comfortable or whatever. I truly feel I was just born this way. Hard to think of anything that could have influenced me other than nature.

[Ally 2112]

Im not really sure if i was born this way ?.But i do remember having a couple of dreams when i was very young about cding.This was way before i even crossdressed
The first time i did was about 11 years of age it was a red dress that i never actually saw my mom wear after that i was hooked

[Susan L]

1 - I remember trying on my mothers pantyhose when I was in my teens.
2 - I did not put on womens clothes again for many years due to many circumstances but I always remember associating with women things and feelings. This was very confusing to me as I was brought up in a very masculine family with 2 other brothers.
3 - N/A
4 - I think the odds are very high that young kids try on the clothes of the opposite gender
One thing I can say is I have always struggled with these feelings. I have at last stopped fighting them and gave in to who & what I am. I'm much happier and finding new things about myself that in my opinion are good things. It seems when you try to be some one your not, that person is never real, I feel more real now than I ever have.

[DebbieL]

The title is often mentioned/expressed here at this Forum. 4 Qs.
It's a popular title and a good question


1] When did you first CD and if it was "at a very early age" is that part of the reason maybe?
I first started dressing when I was about 2, and was just one of the girls until I was 6. When they told me I HAD to play with the boys, it was really hard on me.
I didn't play like a boy, I didn't fight back, so I usually got beat up pretty badly. It just wasn't in my nature.


2] Are there folks who started much later - perhaps in their teens even - who also feel they were born this way?
I've known others who were like this. They had been very effeminate and many people assumed they were gay, or they WERE gay, and when they started later, they realized it fit who they were.


3] Anyone who started "very early" NOT feel you were born that way?
I had cousins who used to join me in my grandmother's cellar. We'd put on the dresses and parade around. Some really got into it and clearly wanted to be girls, but several thought it was a big joke, a bit of fun, and couldn't wait to get outside where they could wrestle and do their boy things. There were two tomboys as well who were more like the boys. Two of my cousins really wanted to be pretty and liked dressing up, but they committed suicide in their early teens - they were torn apart by fundamentalist parents, my grandfather, and other hard core "Christians".

Many of those who don't feel they were born this way view cross-dressing as "an expensive hobby", like collecting coins or flying a private plane.


4] What are the odds that many young kids, both boys and girls, tried on their parents or siblings clothes?
The practice is probably very common. For many, it's not a significant experience, and it is just a fun thing to do when it's raining outside or there's nothing better to do.
Those who are transgender



No doubt about it, Many here were born into the "wrong body". But for others, it looks like that phrase is often tossed out as a "reason or excuse". CDing is not against the law. No reason or excuse is needed is it?

Many of us are transgendered, and just looking for where we are on the scale. There is the struggle to retain the comfortable and familiar which pulls us to lower levels, while fantasies and "magic wand" desire may be much higher levels. The lowest level - a one on the transgender scale isn't even considered a cross-dresser but rather a fetish dresser, someone who just like wearing certain items and usually only for sexual pleasure. The highest level, the level 6 is a transsexual who is likely to mutilate themselves, harm themselves, or commit suicide unless they transition.

However, I have heard of many men on the lower levels, people who are one or two on the scale, who consider themselves very masculine and have no desire to switch sexes. For them, the desire is to have the same freedom to wear certain items such as under-dressing, the way women have freedom of choice. Not all women who wear pants want to be men, and not all men who want to wear silky panties want to be women.


I sure hope no one here thinks they could even come close to guessing accurately the number of men who actually CD? Maybe it's just mantyhose during the winter months or full time underdressing. In the grand scheme of things, does the actual # even matter?

It depends on how you define and what you define. According to some studies by the Kinsey Institute, Masters & Johnson Institute, and Benjamin institute, those who participate in transgender behavior somewhere between 2 and 6 on the scale is actually quite significant, as high as 75% have worn at least a few items of female clothing, and enjoyed it. The count for those who are type 5 or type 6 is much smaller, possibly as low as 1 in 30, and fewer than 3 per thousand actually seek full transition.

The challenge comes in what you are counting and how you are counting it.

If you ask "Are you transsexual" you will get a very small number of yes answers.
On the other hand, if you ask "Have you ever worn clothing made for the opposite sex" the number would be MUCH higher.
The key is that MOST men who have worn one or more articles of clothing probably don't consider themselves cross-dressers or anywhere on the transgender scale.

http://health.blurtit.com/1362272/what-percentage-of-men-in-the-us-wear-womens-panties

http://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/wp-content/uploads/Gates-How-Many-People-LGBT-Apr-2011.pdf

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/How_many_people_in_this_world_are_transgender

[Billiejosehine]

The title is often mentioned/expressed here at this Forum. 4 Qs.

1] When did you first CD and if it was "at a very early age" is that part of the reason maybe?

2] Are there folks who started much later - perhaps in their teens even - who also feel they were born this way?

3] Anyone who started "very early" NOT feel you were born that way?

4] What are the odds that many young kids, both boys and girls, tried on their parents or siblings clothes?

No doubt about it, Many here were born into the "wrong body". But for others, it looks like that phrase is often tossed out as a "reason or excuse". CDing is not against the law. No reason or excuse is needed is it? I sure hope no one here thinks they could even come close to guessing accurately the number of men who actually CD? Maybe it's just mantyhose during the winter months or full time underdressing. In the grand scheme of things, does the actual # even matter?

Here's the thing, we are all different and there's many reasons why a person such as myself engages in CDing. Some start at a very early age others later. Maybe is a form of escape, access, gratification, or a sensory issue. For me I experimented at an early age, stopped, and started again as a teen. Could I have been this way? Maybe, but I haven't really given it much thought.

[Dani0948]

First time was about age 9, playing dressup with my 2 younger sisters. I was hooked. I must have been born this way. Why else would it feel so good?

[Sarah21]

1) I was 4 and I was caught as well as I started crying because I didn't know how to take the dress off.
4) I'm sure there are many, and many leave it behind them and go on with their lives, others take it with them for the rest of there lives.

It's a complicated question to answer, each to their own and all that but I think my life would have been a lot simpler if I was born a different person.

[Brooklyn]

I distinctly recall dressing up when I was five. I was stepping out in public by the time I was 14 or 15. Of course, no-one knows if being this way is nature or nurture or both. Sometimes I have blamed my parents for the ordeal, but child rearing can't explain all of it, and I know two local families with two transsexual family members, so maybe it's partly genetic/hormonal?

Probably most boys who have the chance will try on women's clothes, but I have not noticed this behavior in girls. Most CDers and many TS people are in the closet, so the phenomenon is difficult to survey. It might make a difference towards personal and social acceptance, however, if research proved that crossdressing was as common as say, being gay, or being left handed. :rose:

[PaulaQ]

Well, I am pretty sure I was born this way. But I have to admit, the hormones I'm taking help a whole bunch. ;)

[Katie_Did GG]

[...]
Probably most boys who have the chance will try on women's clothes, but I have not noticed this behavior in girls. [...]

I cannot speak for all women of course, but I tried on my dad's stuff at a very early age--may 3 1/2 or 4 years old. He was a supervisor and had all these really shiny dress shoes and lots of ties. :D I idolized my dad and wanted to grow up to be just like him.

[Marcelle]

The old nurture/nature debate always crops up. In response:


1] When did you first CD and if it was "at a very early age" is that part of the reason maybe?

Don't recall dressing at a very early age but do recall liking my sister's clothes more than my own and even recall an argument when I was six as to why I could not wear one of my sister's jumpers . . . dad put an end to that real quick.

2] Are there folks who started much later - perhaps in their teens even - who also feel they were born this way?

My first true CD experience (fully dressed) was at 17 with my first girlfriend. I did it once felt ashamed and never did it again until recently.

3] Anyone who started "very early" NOT feel you were born that way?

Can't answer this question as I am not sure.

4] What are the odds that many young kids, both boys and girls, tried on their parents or siblings clothes?

Probably quite high. Children are innocent and will do things which seem fun and trying on clothes may just be that . . . trying on clothes. Are they CD, perhaps a few but most probably not.

REPSONSE CAVEAT - I am speaking as a CD/TG gal and cannot speak for TS/TG gals who will have a different take on this.

If we play semantics then "yes" we were born this way. After all I am CD/TG and I was born. However, I think the OP is talking about "nature" or biological differences between us an those who are note. In the end . . . were we (CD/TG) born this way (nature) it is hard to say.

Most of the running beliefs (neuro-chemical) are just hypothesis at this juncture as I have yet to read a study where a CDer's brain was excised and examined post mortem to examine differences in neuronal connections due to neurotransmitter interaction or comparative studies to male (non-TG) and/or female brain tissue. However, we would be naïve to not believe that there has to be some nature at play. Is it behavioral (nurture) once again the prevailing literature will support this - something happened at a young age to trigger the desire to dress.

IMHO most likely a combination of the two, nurture will only get you halfway there so there has to be some nature at play. But then again . . . If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to see it, did it really fall? Or in our case, if a neurotransmitter triggers a desire to dress and nobody can see it, is it really nature?

Hugs

Isha

[Tina B.]

1] When did you first CD and if it was "at a very early age" is that part of the reason maybe?

I remember dressing in my sisters stuff when I was 6, before that, memory is a little sketchy after 70 years.

2] Are there folks who started much later - perhaps in their teens even - who also feel they were born this way?

I wouldn't know what they think.

3] Anyone who started "very early" NOT feel you were born that way?

Not me.

4] What are the odds that many young kids, both boys and girls, tried on their parents or siblings clothes?

Very high I would think.

But does it really make a difference, if you dress and feel you can't give it up, when and how you started is unimportant, where still all in the same boat.

[Dianne S]

1: I first CD'd at around 9 years old (I think) though I fantasized about it much earlier... maybe 4 yrs old.

2: N/A

3: I feel I was "born that way"

4: I would guess that most young kids have tried on their opposite-sex siblings clothes at some point, but that for most of them it wasn't really exciting or fun.

[ShelbyDawn]

1] My first memories go back to age 4 or 5 and I definitely feel I was born this way.
2] Can't answer for others but feel pretty strongly that just like so many other things, opportunity has much to do with when something manifests.
3]
4] I have older brothers and we all played dress up. I am the only one that is an adult cross-dresser, so for me this is a definite yes.

I don't think I was born into the "wrong body" and I won't claim to understand why I like to wear women's clothing or what it means in the grand scheme of things.
Fore me, it is just one of many things I put in the "that's just the way it is" column...

:hugs:

Shelby

[LaraPeterson]

My earliest memories are of begin in my mom's lingerie drawer trying on her things. So I guess I was born this way--either way, I love it.