Blessing or Curse?

[Jaymees22]

Do you find Crossdressing a blessing or a curse?

Most of the time I feel it's a blessing as we seem to be a chosen few that can get relief and happiness from just changing our clothes.

Of course there are downsides, hiding it and sometimes guilt and many more things.

But I really don't think any of us would be doing this if we didn't get something out of it.

What do you think?

[Kate Simmons]

I think the drive to be our own person is pretty strong. :)

[Lexi Moralas]

I think to me it is both

[Katey888]

Jaymees, I like your style :battingeyelashes: and I agree that we must be blessed if we get so much from changing our appearance, but there is a high degree of fantasy and escapism in what we do. Isn't it true that some find their release in drugs or alcohol - societally more damaging but socially more acceptable than our passion. But it probably has its downsides for all of us... it's just better to be treating our burden as a more positive opportunity.
Katey x

[reb.femme]

I think it's a blessing as I get to wear lingerie and dresses.

Rebecca

[kimdl93]

Accepting oneself is a blessing. I lived far too many years with the adverse effects of denial, repression and self-loathing. Being freed from all that deeply ingrained misery has made my life better in every dimension.

[Cheryl T]

While it can and has been both I think that there would be so much missing from ME if I were not the person I am and have become because of my feminine side and it's expression.

[Valarie]

I am fortunate to have a supportive and understanding wife, she even helped me pick out my first wig today. When I was a teen and lived at home I felt it was a curse. I used to cry and tell myself I was sick and that I needed help. Now looking back I realize there is nothing wrong with me or any of us. I have said it on here before and I may right about it later, that we are double spirited like the Native Americans had in their society we can belong in both worlds male and female but our current society does not see it that way that is why we see it as curse.

[(Sara)]

It is a blessing, it has given me a different perspective in life and a better of understanding of other people, I can accept people for who they are as I had to learn to accept myself.

It being a blessing doesn't mean its all milk and honey! Other people do not have the same privilege as I, therefore do not understand me. It is a small price for the lovely experiences I have.

[CynthiaD]

Definitely a blessing. Transforming from male to female is such an exquisite experience, I couldn't imagine my life without it. Just to look in the mirror and see me looking back, instead of a stranger -- how could my life be complete without that?

[Dianne S]

Yes, it's both.

It's a blessing because it's fun and exhilarating. It's a curse (for me, at any rate) because I cannot be open about it to everyone I know, and because it does cause my wife discomfort and upset.

[BrendaAlexandra]

For me it's both.

[Robbiegirl]

For me its a BIG time Curse ! Lots of shame over the last 58 years. well I guess I can't count the first 5.

[trishacd]

I remember when i was very young buying nylons before pantyhose were made.I would dress up a lot and was sure i was the only guy in the world who loved dressing. Then as i got older the internet came into play i have met a lot of gurls like me. I would enjoy meeting with some cds in person but i also understand why people need to be discrete.i get considerable enjoyment from crossdressin and i consider it a blessing.

[suzy1]

I always answer this sort of question by describing it as the ‘icing on the cake of life’ for me. Its a pleasure not enjoyed by most people. In fact most people are incapable of enjoying it or even understanding it!

Lucky old us I always say.:)

[PaulaQ]

Curse. It took me a while this year to convince myself that "no, God doesn't really hate me..."
I'd rather have cancer, than be trans. You can sometimes now recover from cancer, for one thing.

[Allison2006]

I'd say it's both. It's probably my best stress relief, although that's not my primary reason for it. The curse part of it is that I'm not out and the worries associated with that.

[Beverley Sims]

Jaymee,
A bit of both for me, I do make the most of it whichever way I go.

[lovetobedani]

It's definately both for me.

[Katy120]

I've asked myself that question countless times. The fact that I am here writing on this forum would seem to indicate a positive view of this activity, but on balance it undoubtedly leans to the curse side of the curve. It's an expensive preoccupation. As Jayme suggested there is also a guilt factor which for me at times can be overwhelming. If I had a choice I would have erased the notion of crossdressing from my mind before going down this path. It is very much a Pandora's box. I know I have said this before, but I really feel the urge to say it again, "Sheesh... life is complicated."

[Rachelakld]

Blessing
I get to share my hobby with daughters (who are a similar size) and it's not as expensive as other hobbies that interest me

[mary something]

blessings and curses are the same thing, depends on what you make of it.

[Jessica giovanna]

I find it a blessing! I am me! Living my life as Jessica has brought a peace unto me that nothing else could...except my sons...they are #1..always. But yes! I feel very happy and zen like when allowed to be myself.

[NancyJ]

Curse. If I could have lived my life w/o this powerful wish/urge/desire life would have been easier. I am still working on accepting myself, but do not have acceptance from the person I most want to accept all of me (my wife). If I could take a magic pill and never again have these thoughts and urges I'd take it in a minute. Nancy

[Sarah Beth]

To quote Mr. Monk from the tv show "its a blessing, and a curse" Its a blessing in that when I can dress and relax with it I feel so good about me and who I ma as a complete person with that female part of me exposed. The curse is that its not accepeted by enough people to be able to enjoy it more often. It's also a curse because of those times when I can't wear at least a little something fem I just don't feel complete.

[Megan b]

Curse for me. But I know it's part of me and it's not going away. I've accepted that, I like this side of me but life would have been easier without the cding. I most likely would still be married but when I finally excepted this side of me she lost hope and started a new chapter in her life without me. So now I find myself starting over, wanting new love but knowing it's going to be a hard mountain to climb. Wish me luck.

[Patty]

It's a blessing here with me.

[Jordan]

I say cross dressing is a blessing as it lets out our inner feelings

[dana 1]

It was a curse when I was younger, but in my late fifties it turned into a blessing, something to look forward to, and more time to enjoy.

[Edm_Jamie]

Life would be easier if I didn't dress, but if I could choose my next life, I'd pick crossdresser again, just perhaps with a 5'6" frame this time :)

[Seana Summer]

Being a part time CD is more a blessing than a curse for me. It did not become a blessing at all until I accepted it as part of who I am. There are far worse and more dangerous habits/hobbies to have than CDing. When the world becomes fully accepting than it will be a 100% blessing.

I wish I would have come to accept this part of myself years earlier!

[KellyWilliams]

I'd say it's a curse. I am forced to stay inside, can't even discuss it with my wife, and would be fired from my job if they had a clue about it.

[LaraPeterson]

If you are using the word to describe something that brings adversity to life, it's definitely a curse for me. I cannot count the times that dressing has caused me pain. On the other hand, when I AM dressed and enjoying that part of my life, I cannot call it anything but a blessing. Being en femme let's me express the real me. Probably like most of us here, I have a bunch of regrets as the result of dressing up and being girly, but the advantages way outweigh the disadvantages. So, on the balancing scale of life--for me, it just the reality of life.

[Jilmac]

I consider it a blessing, also there is no longer the guilt, shame or hiding. I am who I am and I don't give a rodent's rectum what others say or think.

[AngelaKelly<3]

The hiding and the guilt comes from societal pressures. So that's nothing anyone should worry about.

I see it as a blessing. It gives us happiness and anything that brings happiness is a great thing! :)

[Alice B]

Of course I started very late in life, but I'be never felt it is a curse. I'm not sure it is a blessing, but I do feel more in touch with women in my life, read them better and better understand how they think and react.It has made for better communication, acceptance and closer ties to my daughter, grandchildren and other family members. Plus it has opened the door to making friends of similar desires. So maybe it is a blessing.

[kelly10]

Definitely a blessing!
Now my irrational and barely controllable love for chicken wings... now that's a curse.
No wait...sitting in front of a basket of freshly made, steaming golden brown suicide wings with a side of celery and blue cheese dip, mouth watering...that's a blessing!
No wait.....a curse... a blessing...a curse... ahh the hell with it! I'll think about it while I'm savoring it and decide later...

[Megan.]

i think it is both too a blessing on one hand and on the other a curse because you can wear beautiful dresses and skirts but there is the pink fog to deal with and that is hard.

[Marcelle]

Hi Jaymee,

I have hidden this part of me for so long (such wasted time . . . sigh) so I see each day that I can dress fully as a blessing. When I do dress it feels right and I do not feel like hiding it from anyone . . . so out I go.

Hugs

Isha

[Heather-Barbie]

For me, it has been a curse and a blessing.

It has been a curse as my life would have been a lot easier without this. I also would have a lot more closet space without being a CD :-)

On the other hand, it has been a blessing.

I have learned who my real friends are. Those that can accept me and those that could not opened up a lot I did not know.

I learned to be a lot more accepting of others.

I learned to be a more happy person as I began to really know who I am.

I went to counseling because I was a CDer. It turned out counseling helped me learn so much more about life and how to handle it.

Because I opened up, I was able to meet a wonderful woman who is now my SO.

It taught me to laugh and really enjoy so much that life has to offer.

[JenniferLynn0370]

It's a blessing to me; I feel lucky to be me!

[Jocelyn Quivers]

A blessing with lot's of responsibility, challenges, maybe a few headache's, agony, but a blessing none the less.

[CarlaWestin]

Neither. It's just an "is" Although, it's a pretty good is!

[BillieAnneJean]

I started late so I bypassed any guilt. When you have been confronted with the fragile nature of life, you find less time for unnecessary guilt. So I have no guilt, no regrets. It is just too much fun. So for me it is a blessing.
But the eternal search for the perfect pair of red Mary Janes might be a curse.
More important, IMHO, is how our SOs think about this. I put a LOT of work in to making it not be a curse for my SO. I can't imagine her ever thinking it is a blessing, although maybe in some totally improbable way..........

[Christina Kay]

Blessing that I am now coming to terms with being TG and enjoying my feminine side. Curse that I kept it from my wife , and now she bears the burden also. That's the part that saddens me:(. Hugs