WHY do folks keep asking ...

[Wildaboutheels]

WHY? Over and over and over. Unless maybe many/"most" who water here think they have FULL CONTROL over what they like/desire in a mate? Or just WHAT turns them on? Or OFF for that matter. You don't really think Mother Nature is going to allow that do you? Mother Nature is why our brains go though so many gyrations everyday to try and protect us from ourselves in all manner of things.

Feeling guilt and shame for something Mother Nature has bestowed you with is rather silly is it not?

[Cheryl T]

Who keeps asking WHY? ... I'm confused.

[suzy1]

Yep, I’m confused too. Does there have to be a why?

[laciewhite]

when i was a teenager i did feel a lot of guilt, shame and outright fear...but i think that was probably because i didn't know what i was.

when i first discoverd i liked wearing women's clothes i don't think i even knew about 'transvestites'. and when i did find out, the general view of transvestites was that they were either homosexual or women trapped in men's bodies. and i didn't feel that i was either of those things, but then i started to doubt my feelings. ignorance was definitely not bliss.

being a lot older and wiser now, i realise that there is a very broad spectrum of motivations for crossdressing. i know that i am a hetrosexual man who also is a transvestic fetishist. i'm comfortable with the situation for myself and just like to enjoy it whenever i can, although still prefer to keep my activities secret. i guess i've been hiding away so long its just second nature now.

but sometimes i do still wonder why/how i became hardwired to associate crossdressing with sexual arousal. it seems to have been that way forever but i can't explain what made me this way.

so yes, i do still sometimes question the 'WHY?' but i'm over the guilt and shame thing.

[kimdl93]

Why? Its just human nature. Mother nature endowed us with a level of awareness of the world and time. And studying and learning from the world around us...when to plant, based on the position of the sun, or remembering where the sabre toothed tigers tend to hide has helped us survive and multiply. So we are geared to ask questions. The other thing we know is that our brains abhor a vacuum. If we don't know the answer to a particular question, our brain obliges by filling in the gaps...analogous to how our brain fills in the blind spot in the retina. When we don't know why, we postulate...offer hypotheses. And even if these are untestable, such as where do people go when they die, we sometimes accept them to fill in the blank spot. It fills that vacuum of knowledge.

So, the question of why I prefer to dress like a woman is perfectly natural. Questioning even unanswerable problems is part of what we do. And someday we may actually discover the answers.

[mary something]

I always assumed that the post here about "why" is because someone in real life asked them "why" or assumed something that wasn't true about their version of "why". It's just human nature.

[Katey888]

Why?
Well, causality, determinism or existentialism, of course.
We could all do far worse than go off and read a bit of Simone de Beauvoir if we're snowed in... alternatively, crack another bottle of red and say: to hell with it - it is, what it is, and I'm enjoying it. :meditate:
Katey x

[Karren H]

Its early onset crossdressing induced altzheimers! No one can remember they already asked "Why?" a bazillion times.....

[NathalieX66]

Why ask why?
I like me just the way I am. .....probably because I watched to much Mr. Rogers when I was a kid. :heehee:

[kimdl93]

Its early onset crossdressing induced altzheimers! No one can remember they already asked "Why?" a bazillion times.....

Best answer yet! Now, what was the question?

[natcrys]

I'm sure at some point in time, medical science will have completely figured how and why we are inclined to do what we do (in all its various forms and flavours), but until then .. and actually, even then.. I only care because I'm curious, not because I feel a need to explain myself.

From age 4 to 11, I did think I was the only one on this planet.. so I did wonder "why" back then.. but as soon as my elementary school teacher gave us a small lecture about LGBT-issues.. I knew there were more of us. And that just stopped the "why?"... and started my curiousity to find out more about practical issues like "who else is doing this, how do I get involved, where are they". :)

[Melissa_59]

Why do folks keep asking "Why do you do that?" Well gosh, we can't answer it either! If we had the One Single Answer to that (like the One Ring to Bind Them), it would probably open even more questions and someone would probably figure out a way to become insanely wealthy off the answer.

I don't understand why I have the feelings I do, why I feel it necessary to put on a bra and wear my forms, and to put on makeup and smile at myself in the mirror on the rare occasion that I think I've done a good job with it (a trowel helps.) I really wish I did completely understand why but it's honestly a mystery to me and if you ask 1000 people who dress as the other sex why they do it, you'll get a couple of hundred different answers I'll wager.

We just know we do, and for some of us it's a compulsion. We purge and then end up buying again, which is why after I got over my last purge and bought again I realized how stupid and costly that is (it was my third purge - and I threw out some awesome shoes too which really makes me sad if I dwell on it - price paid, lesson learned) so I don't purge anymore.

I can tell you why the tides go in and out. I can tell you why the sky is blue. I can tell you why it's incredibly important for life on Earth to have a Moon that stabilizes our axial tilt in reference to the Sun, and I can even tell which software application is best for tracking Petabytes of disk storage and switches in an enterprise environment (my opinion, anyway.) But I can't tell you why I dress.

I can tell you that it is important to me, and that it has isolated me from most of my family. And that only one of my daughters knows that I do, and has asked me not to do it when she's around (which is why I haven't told my other daughter.)

So why do other people ask "Why?" Because they don't understand either. And there isn't really a good clear cut answer.

[Jaylyn]

Because some folks have been bestowed by Momma Nature to question the why of our universe and especially the why of living creatures. I'm one of those kind of living beings. If there is no why then there is no betterment of our quality of life. I taught school many years and I loved the kiddos that asked why especially in the science field. Without them we probably would still be inventing ways to stay warm or dry. Without whys I might be wearing heels to work in, and they don't work on the farm.... Lol

[Tracii G]

Here we go again I'll go make some popcorn.:)

[Beverley Sims]

Me, I was always told not to ask why, "just go and do it".

Tracii,
Where's that popcorn?

Yes I do read. :)

[LaraPeterson]

Katey, I prefer white, but I'll crack one open with you anytime--it is what it is, isn't it?

[dsmth]

One major reason why is because it is fun!
Another few reasons, for me, would include (but are not limited to) the following...
It is a way to express oneself more freely and with more style options -- with more than the most basic forms that men's clothes (in my opinion) are limited to utilitarian, mostly thick, tough mostly colorless and unsensual fabrics... Which leads to the next reason...
It is a way to enjoy more control over ones physical sensations -- feel the breeze through your legs as a loose fabric flutters around them, for example...

[KristinTX]

After years of wasting time with wondering why...........i'm adopting the "why not" philosophy!

[Daphne Renee]

things that arent considered quite normal people ask why. People around us want to know why. We dont even know the answer . the only thing I can think of why it keeps being asked is maybe someday someone will have an answer. I doubt it but this is the only theory I can come up with right now.

[Wildaboutheels]

TRUE or FALSE?

A CDer of any chosen label will never be free till they conquer guilt and shame.

[kimdl93]

Ah, in my way of thinking, guilt and shame are the opposite of self acceptance and the greatest obstacles to freedom for any of us.

[Marcelle]

Why? Because I can.

Traci,

Do you have any popcorn left?

Hugs

Isha

[Katy120]

I can't speak for others with regard to all the "why" questions. The reason I keep asking myself the question and occasional chime in here on that subject is that cross dressing is simply illogical. It doesn't make sense. Thus the "why" question seems like a perfectly logical question to ask when dealing with an illogical activity. I'm not suggesting that cross dressing is a bad activity because one can't wrap your mind around it with the clarity of 2 + 2 = 4. Perhaps at some point in time someone will write an explanation that will satisfy my feeble mind's need-to-know, but until that happens I will probably keep asking myself that question and being interested in threads about the "why." I will in the future try to be careful not to write too often on the subject since it seemingly irritates others in the community. I am a cross dresser, not a salt rubber.

[daarleane]

Personally I like the response of "why not" all though the "because I can" is a very close runner up. Why do you ask? Do you want to find out how it feels?

Do you have any carmel corn?

[Katey888]

Wild... your last question; True or False...? How do you know when you're free...? How about this... :devil:
If a CDer is in a sealed closet with a dress and a flask of poison... how do you know, whether they're dead, alive or dressed at any particular time, if you don't open the closet...? :D
POP! Lara: that's the sound of a nice chardonnay being opened.... :cheers:
It's still what it was...
Katey x