Be who you are, not who you want to be.

[Candice Mae]

As I continue my journey, I find my self looking in the mirror or picture only to see my self. Although my refection has changed the person in the mirror has not. I still like my truck, metal music, playing guitar, hockey, and mechanics. Don't get me wrong I still like a nice dress or a cute pair of shoes as I always have. But I not one to talk about make up or fashion, I am just who I am and always will be.

I've known from a young age that I am different from normal guys and cds. I have never really felt that I am a man, but not a woman. As I have never been one and will never be one genetically. But I just feel that this is me and no clothes will change who I am.

I still have along way to go, I just take it one day at a time. If you jump in the fire you will get burned, but if walk on the coals you will survive.

[Paula DAngelo]

Candice, I couldn't agree with you more. Everyone should be who they are, and be the best them that they can be. I've also noticed that my likes/dislikes don't change based on how I'm presenting, they are the same since they are part of what makes me, me. The one think I have noticed is that I'm more out going when I'm dressed, but I think this stems more from the fact that when I am dressed I'm more comfortable with myself since my inner and outer selves match (I never really cared for how my male self looked), even though I know I'm no beauty.

[Beverley Sims]

Candice,
I like your philosophy and hope you do not have too much trouble with the mood swings ect.
I still like man things, just like my daughter who helped her boyfriend build a car for her from parts.

[Katey888]

Candice - I think you have a great approach to life and what you want out of it - we all have to be true to ourselves. You say that you feel different (which I'm sure is true) but I think we're all different in our quirks, likes, dislikes, feelings - accepting those differences in ourselves is a good start to being happy. And I sincerely hope you'll be happier as things progress - keep smiling as you do in your pic here and you won't go far wrong. :hugs:
Katey x

[Tracii G]

Candice I feel the very same.
I am male by birth yes but a mix of both male and female in all aspects regarding life's path.
Can I change that? No I am who I am.

[Gillian Gigs]

This speaks in a loud volume to me. Whether we say,"to thy own self to true", Shakespeare, or the AA serenity prayer, we have to accept who we are in what we can not change. I live in cowboy country, there are some real cowboys, but most just want to look like one. There are real women, and those who want to look like them, does the packaging change the contents?

[marci_x]

Seems logical to me.

[Aprilrain]

does the packaging change the contents?

Sometimes the contents come in the wrong packaging

[kimdl93]

Who you are is an ongoing process appraisal and our self image is incredibly malleable, influenced my experience, aspirations, and genetics...and maybe other forces we haven't identified. So live in the now as you choose to be. You get to decide who you are in each passing moment.

But don't define your gender by things you do. Girls like lots of things you've mentioned...none of these are gender specific.

[Candice Mae]

Thanks ladies, I'm glad to see others see my point of view.

[Rachael Leigh]

Candice I know exactly what you mean I've always known I was just a little different than most guys but like you I'm into sports like football and baseball, but I sure love fashion and cute clothes.
I will never get this part of myself and it's been a long struggle and for what it has done to my marriage just hurts me so much. We all have differences and that's why we are so unique as humans.
Thanks for sharing your insight

[heatherdress]

Thanks Candice. Very meaningful thoughts and approach to life. Maybe add

"Be who you are, not who you want to be, or what others expect you to be"

[Cynthia Anne]

Very well said Candice!
I think being who I am leads me closer to being who I want to be!

[AmyGaleRT]

Very much so, Candice! That's good advice for all of us girls: be who you are, and be it in style! :battingeyelashes:

- Amy

[Zylia]

I read your post yesterday and I wanted to respond, but it took me a while to really make up my mind. I'm not sure if I really have. I think people who try to be something they're not are not going to have a good time all the time, insofar I agree. However, not everyone knows who they are from the outset and it's not set in stone. Also, there's nothing inherently wrong with striving towards a higher goal, even if you know you're not going to fully make it in the end.

As an example, I'm not sure if I ever mentioned this here, but I have been diagnosed with a disorder somewhere on the autism spectrum. It's not that I'm completely anti-social because of it, but I do not have the urge to have a 'social life' as much as normal people have as a result of it. That's not to say I don't like social interaction, never have the need for it or it couldn't be beneficial for me, both personally and professionally. Anyway, I could accept who I 'am' and happily live in solitude for the rest of my life (slight exaggeration) or I could try and become something 'better', also ultimately to the benefit of myself.

So no, don't limit yourself to who you (or others) think you are, but try to find what you can do and can become.


What if a child dreamed of becoming something other than what society had intended? What if a child aspired to something greater?
~ Jor-El *

It's not who I am underneath but what I do that defines me.
~ Bruce Wayne (as Batman)


* terrible movie, I know.

[mykell]

I still have along way to go, I just take it one day at a time. If you jump in the fire you will get burned, but if walk on the coals you will survive.

Candice,
good advise, but i also see song lyrics there, are you writing one....

[Candice Mae]

Thanks ladies.

Mikell I do write music, but I'm not much of a lyricist.

[Marcelle]

Hi Candice Mae,

Very good advice and an attitude that I am slowly developing in my own approach to doing what I do. I am glad you are finding peace with yourself.

Hugs

Isha

[k lynn]

Candice I feel the very same.
I am male by birth yes but a mix of both male and female in all aspects regarding life's path.
Can I change that? No I am who I am.

So true candice I like riding my motorcycle and working out but other than that have a lot of female aspects regarding life also I have always said be true too yourself