Need advice for driving while fully Dressed

[AKADonna]

I am preparing to drive a couple of hundred miles to a CD event while being fully dressed. I have been "out" dressed a few times, but I am concerned about what to do when nature calls? If I stop at an Interstate rest area, which restroom do I go into? I think I would feel pretty silly entering a large, multi-stall restroom in which I am likely to encounter a woman or 2 pretty close up. Now, I'm 6'2 and at 70 yrs old, don't feel that I pass all that well, so I am concerned about some woman screaming and making a big scene. I can envision a similar reaction if I encountered guys in the men's room while dressed en femme.

What should I do?

[PretzelGirl]

If you are going to be uncomfortable, you may want to shoot for a fast food place with single person restrooms. Family restrooms are very nice for this need, but I can't say that I have seen them in places along the highway often.

[Marcelle]

Hi Donna,

I just ran into a similar situation this past weekend when I was driving back home "en femme" from a business/social trip. I normally shoot for family restrooms as Sue recommended but nature's call came when I was travelling down the highway and I had no option but to use the bathroom on a roadside stop. Now I weighed my options and going into the guy's was a no brainer . . . I was in a dress and presenting female . . . not likely to go over well. The women's I had the same worry as you. So I decided in the end to go with the lesser of two evils and walked into the ladies. I ran into two women coming out who just walked past me. Found a stall, did my business, washed my hands (three women there) and walked out. Nobody screamed or batted an eye. If you are going to use the ladies my advice . . . go in do your business, wash hands and leave . . . don't linger checking make-up or brushing hair.

Hugs

Isha

[MissJoanne]

Go in do your business, wash hands and leave . . . don't linger checking make-up or brushing hair.

That's one of the two pieces of advice I was given. The other: remember to point your feet the right way :-)

[Jonithan]

"Depends" -on the situation. Sorry I couldn't resist. I've encountered a GG in the men's room before. At least she was verrrry passable. When I walked out, I saw the line for the ladies room and figured out why.

Joni

[AKADonna]

I'm really hung up with concern over this topic. Since I am on a diuretic for my heart and thus have to urinate a lot, I am considering skipping that pill on the morning of travel just to minimize the need somewhat!

[Marcelle]

Hi Donna,

Is it possible to go with Sue's advice and find a fast food place off the interstate to do your business. I don't skipping needed medication would be a good idea.

Hugs

Isha

[Raychel]

I have driven a lot of miles dressed, When it gets to be time for food, gas, or nature calls, I try to plan them all together.
I do a quick change back to make mode in the truck, before I step out in the world.

[Beverley Sims]

Unless you look obvious I think you are better to go to the rest room you are dressed for.

[Katie Oxford]

Not a very ladylike suggestion, but you could... um... take advantage of your dual nature. Pop behind a tree somewhere discreet!

I feel like I've done a bad thing, suggesting peeing standing up al fresco in a crossdressing forum! :heehee: (And in my first main forum post too...) Just seems an obvious 'escape route' to take all thought out of the problem, if needed.

[Diane Smith]

There are ... ah ... "devices" sold mainly to long distance truckers that can let you take care of your business (at least #1) without leaving the car. Although I wouldn't make a habit of it on a regular basis, one of these can be a lifesaver when there's just no other option. Like Donna, I'm on diuretics and sometimes feel the strong need to go when I'm a long distance in between highway exits or rest stops -- having a way to do it without waiting or hunting for a suitable place saves a lot of mess and bother.

- Diane

[LaraPeterson]

Donna, use the ladies room. It'll help you get used to be one of the "girls." It's likely no one will even give you a second look. When en femme, I always use the ladies room--the other choice just seems silly.

[Kim_Bitzflick]

I've done quite a few miles on the interstate and gone to countless movie theaters. Whenever I am presenting female, I use the ladies room. It's no big deal. Most women will just smile or not even notice me. Just do your business and get out.

[julia marie]

Never had an issue with using the women's room. I will note that if I see kids going in alone ahead of me or what appears to be a father or husband waiting right outside the bathroom, I will wait a minute or two, like until another woman goes in or the kids come out. I may be paranoid, but i don't want a parent or husband reading me and causing a scene.
I have used "family" or "male/female" rest rooms on occasion, but don't look for them at most highway rest stops. I suspect the states discourage them, considering that they lock and they could be a good location for the casual hookups that have happened in mens rooms for decades.

[Eryn]

If you are dressed female, use the ladies' room with confidence. You may think that you are not passable, but nobody pays close attention and, even if they suspect, the potential embarrassment they would feel for "calling out" a GG who happened to look masculine will cause them to keep their mouths shut. Just show confidence that you belong there because you do!

Needless to say, do your business, wash your hands, and leave, just as a GG would do at a highway rest stop. Don't talk and don't loiter around. And don't even think of exercising the "male privilege" of standing, even if things aren't as clean as you would like!

[Nikki A.]

If possible I use a single stall family bathroom. If one is not available and I'm dressed I use the ladies room. That includes restaurants, department stores and even the Port Authority Bus Terminal (and standing in line). Never a problem yet. Just as the others said, point the feet in the right direction, and do your business and get out.

[suchacutie]

Has no one had a real emergency need for relief? Just keep you beverage cup and park away from prying eyes. Having said that, Isha has Iit righ. .confidently do what needs to be done and walk away with confident purpose.

[Donna Jean GA]

I have noticed recently several places that have "unisex" bathrooms for a single user with doors that lock. I wish more places would go that way....seems to be the perfect solution! :)

Donna Jean

[TxCassie]

I never faced this situation, but I do believe if you're presenting female, use the female restroom. As the advice given, go in, do your business, don't linger, and leave. In time, I feel you will become more comfortable using the ladies room, and the more comfortable the less noticeable you will become.

[julietalyse]

While in female mode I am the chicken-hearted girl. When traveling en femme for long distances I bring my motor home since I too have the diuretic pill that forces me to piddle. I can’t pass as yet so I bring my own. As planned my weight loss and growth in female behavior will soon let me pass in a women’s bathroom. When all other efforts fail I choose the bathroom that reflects my apparel. Do your business and leave quickly.

[Rhonda Jean]

No way I'd use an interstate rest area. Explore other options.

[StephanieDragg]

I always feel the need to respond to these types of posts were people respond and say without a lot of legal knowledge, well you are dressed as a lady use the ladies restroom. Depending on the state or area in which you live this could lead to legal issues. I live in Michigan and the law is that a person is to use the restroom of the sex that you represent on your drivers license.

Family restrooms of coarse are the best options when out in public and of coarse this doesn't pertain to clubs, etc where they don't really care, but I would recommend to EVERYONE who reads this forum to check the laws in your state or area regarding this before using a restroom. If you were dressed as a female and some mother was in there with her daughter and felt awkward or felt her privacy was violated she could very well inform management who could call authorities.... of coarse this is the worst case scenario, but unfortunately it is possible and the outcome could be a "sexual offender" mark on your record.

When I drive around en fem, I stop at all different kinds of places, so I plan accordingly, but I also carry a bottle in my car at all times for emergency "number ones" lol

[Barbra P]

I don’t go out much other than to support group meetings, held in a public restaurant, and therapy sessions, my Therapist’s office is in a large medical complex. At the restaurant we are expected to use the Women’s Room, a very scary experience the first night I went en femme. I was washing my hands when a woman walked in, she looked my way and our eyes locked via the mirror, she smiled and went into one of the stalls, and I quickly exited. Since that first night I have come to realize that if a woman looks my way all that happens is that she smiles and goes about her business. Most women simply ignore me – they have other business to attend to.

I go to some of my therapy sessions en femme and I mentioned to Kelly, my Therapist, that the one unisex restroom on the third floor was frequently occupied when I arrived and I usually needed to use the restroom before our session. She smiled and said, “Walk down the hall to the Women’s Room, you have just as much right to use the Women’s Room as any other woman here.”

I think Julia made a very good point about children. If I saw kids enter the Women’s Room I’d wait till they came out before entering. I think I’d hold off and wait if I saw a man standing around the entrance as well; while it might seem paranoid I don’t want some (take your pick) bigoted, redneck, super macho, and/or paranoid father or husband accosting me in the belief that he is protecting his wife or child.

[Cheryl T]

My philosophy is "When in Rome"...


If you are comfortable enough to go dressed to or from an event that far from home then you should be comfortable enough to use the ladies room. If not, then perhaps you should rethink the long drive.
I feel that we are more likely to get into an issue being dressed and going into the men's room then using the women's room. If we follow the guidelines as others have stated you should have no issue.

[Persephone]

We really have no basis for helping you in this dilemma. It is very difficult to figure out someone else's ability to successfuly pass in a restroom situation. In general, Eryn is right, few will pay attention under normal circumstances. And you will notice that she very purposefully wrote "with confidence."

If you are scared, shaking like a leaf, or in some other way attracting attention to yourself then you will get noticed and there could be dire consequences, not the least of which are the ones that StephanieDragg brought up.


Depending on the state or area in which you live this could lead to legal issues. ... If you were dressed as a female and some mother was in there with her daughter and felt awkward or felt her privacy was violated she could very well inform management who could call authorities.... of coarse this is the worst case scenario, but unfortunately it is possible and the outcome could be a "sexual offender" mark on your record.

But a comfortable, confident person just walking into what appears to be the appropriate restroom seldom has a problem. So you have to judge your own ability to make that choice.

And, as others have mentioned, there are alternatives. You could buy a motorhome or


http://pics1.ds-static.com/prodimg/85831/300.jpg
Around $5 a three pack (Click here for info) (http://www.drugstore.com/products/prod.asp?pid=85831&catid=110681&aid=338666&aparam=54290801870id85831&device=c&network=g&matchtype=)

Hugs,
Persephone.

[PretzelGirl]

I always feel the need to respond to these types of posts were people respond and say without a lot of legal knowledge, well you are dressed as a lady use the ladies restroom. Depending on the state or area in which you live this could lead to legal issues. I live in Michigan and the law is that a person is to use the restroom of the sex that you represent on your drivers license.

I have heard of these and I can't say I fully understand them. So if I leave my ID in the car, what happens? Can you be legally detained for not carrying an ID? Does a transitioned person who hasn't had their gender marker changed still forced into the other restroom? At face value, it seems to have a lot of holes.

My joking mind pictures someone like Sgt Schultz going "Your papers please!". :D

[DorothyElizabeth]

When I was a child, most interstates did not exist, except for the Pennsylvania and New Jersey turnpikes. We never had much money, and those restrooms charged (you had to drop a dime in the slot to open a stall door, and there were no urinals in the men's rooms.) We used to get off the turnpike and find a cemetery. We'd have a picnic lunch, and find a secluded spot in which to relieve ourselves. (And, for those of you with over-active imaginations, NO! We didn't pee on people's graves! In fact, mom and dad wouldn't even let us kids walk across their tummies. LOL)

Even though there are interstate routes everywhere in this country, I still like to find a cemetery. And it's always a welcome break from the monotony of highway driving to take a side jaunt through a little town.