So this is how it is.. is it?

[Vanessa Rose]

Everyday, or almost every day I see someone transgendered. Presently, this is something on my mind.

It was a lovely day yesterday and we (SO and myself) each were having appetizers and a few glasses of wine. And I leaned over to my beautious, beautious SO and said... what should I say to her...? what can i say? that won't make it awkward...?

What had happened this time is we went outside to enjoy the sun and weather, and the waitress came up introduced herself and was nice and sweet. She was also a linebacker in size and had a big simile and did a great job and was such a beautiful spirit...

So what's my point.... ?

I wanted to make a comment to her that she looked great and such and could not come up with the words or what would work. At the end after we tipped and were walking to the car, my beautious beauty said to me..."why do you feel like you need to say anything...?" I said "I don't know? I feel like I should...."

She looked at me and said "but you did say something to her and let her know that!" I said "how?"

She said by striking up a conversation with her and laughing with her and treating her like everyone else.".

I am such a dumbass honestly people. I never thought of that because it is who I am... but I still have a nagging need to see what others would have said or not said.

This morning we went to another store, same thing...... Lord, with all this, I am lost,,,,, kinda like a box of rocks...


:eek:

what would you all have done..?

Confused...http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/images/icons/icon11.gif

http://www.tamaracroft.co.uk/Smilies/Drogar-EyesRoll%28LBG%29.gif










Vanny

[Laura912]

Treated them like everyone else. You just could have been wrong. Then when the gram negative material hit the revolving air foils, where would you have been?

[Vanessa Rose]

Well most of that I totally have no idea what it means but thanks anyway

[Beverley Sims]

I must be walking around with my eyes closed or the law of averages is working against me.

I hardly notice someone who "is" transgendered as I really can't be sure.

Maybe they are just women who are rough at the edges or men who have had the sharp pieces worn down a bit.

Very observant of you, I am probably not that observant or else I am looking at the wrong thing. :)

[Vanessa Rose]

Beverly I live in a very accepting place far far away. Many folks have come here because of the laid back attitude.

The only one with no courage is me

Sadly

Vanny

[Rachelakld]

So many here it would be hard to comment to each and every one, so I let it slide and chat to them as I would any other person that I wish to communicate with.

[Erica Anne]

I treat everybody the same way. I was a bit confused though, you simply acted natural and treated the person with respect. Is there something I am missing here? I have dealt with many people all different, and treated the same way I would treat anybody else. There was only one time in my life that I was wrong in saying what I said. No wonder why she hated me so... There was a young receptionist recently married and in a short time preparing to have a baby. That was great. Every body was happy.. etc... well I honestly thought two of the ladies were pregnant, one was obvious who the baby shower was for. I tuned and looked at the other girl and asked her when is she do? Her response: "I am not pregnant !" well just minutes before both of the girls were sharing the growing pain experiences and I though she was......

You basically described my ex-wife somewhat there....

[CynthiaD]

I think that treating them like anyone else is the best choice. Anything else would be rude.

[Marcelle]

Hi Vanny,

Your lovely SO hit the nail on the head . . . interact with them as you would anyone else. I appreciate that with people when I am out and about "en femme". To be honest I would find it awkward if someone even with the best intentions told me "my goodness you sure do look good for a cross dresser" (or another such compliment). I don't mind the odd "what a pretty scarf" or "nice outfit" but drawing attention to the fact I am a CDer could be a bit surreal. I wouldn't freak and rip a strip off anyone it would just throw me off my game.

I have seen a few women who could have been TG/CD/TS but to be honest I can't really say they were. I have only met one TG/CD gal at Moxies and she introduced herself to me in a very discreet manner as she overheard me talking to my GG friend expressing fear about using the ladies room (I was en femme at the time). However, even if I knew the gal was TG/CD/TS I would not go up and engage in conversation about CDing, a normal compliment perhaps "nice shoes" but for the most part I would just treat her as I would like to be treated . . . a person going about her day.

Hugs

Isah

[Vanessa Rose]

Hi Vanny,

Your lovely SO hit the nail on the head .

I have seen a few women who could have been TG/CD/TS but to be honest I can't really say they were.

I would just treat her as I would like to be treated . . . a person going about her day.

Hugs

Isah

thanks for your thoughts..

My radar with people and circumstances and reading entire rooms and actions is very unique.. don't know why, but it is...
I can tell not by one trait but by assembling the entirety. My location far, far, far away is so special.. anyways i can tell and I poke my SO.. and she will say, "Oh yes" or why would you say that" and we discuss when we are far away from the person (we don't want to make them feel self conscious..... I am about 8 out of 10 or better......
does not matter...
but this last week has been one after the other in situations like this... never before but this last week.

My SO is beautiously awesome times a million.. she is my world..



I think that treating them like anyone else is the best choice. Anything else would be rude.

After all was said and done it seems so... I had this feeling like maybe not but the consensus is that I was wrong and not to say something unless I was outed first by them.. (and that ain't happening soon). sheesh


I treat everybody the same way.
Every body was happy.. etc... well I honestly thought two of the ladies were pregnant, one was response: "I am not pregnant !" well just minutes before both of the girls were sharing the growing pain experiences and I though she was......

You basically described my ex-wife somewhat there....

OMG I did the exact same thing to a woman... After I made that mistake and she said i am not pregnant, i kept a blank face but said " Well I guess I said that backwards...I am a guy...I meant to say you are not pregnant also are you I heard you talking.... " then I just burst out loud and kept drinking my beer.. oh well... can't win them all.. Lord


So many here it would be hard to comment to each and every one, so I let it slide and chat to them as I would any other person that I wish to communicate with.

What we don't know, we don't know... thus the question... perhaps I should keep my SO around... without her, I would have no friends.

Vanny ......... and thanks again all!

[Caden Lane]

When I finally get from behind my bedroom door into bmw rare air of freedom, I want to be treated like any other woman would. If anyone were to point out that they knew I was truly male, that might be a little ... devastating.

[Tina B.]

Sounds like you handled the meeting just right. being treated as "normal", isn't that all anyone wants.
Oh, your cool, but I see right thought your disguise, no that would not be cool.
Worst yet, would be, sorry, lady, I didn't know your mother was a Russian weight lifter.
No, you did it right.