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View Full Version : Dressing to be able to touch people!?



docrobbysherry
03-02-2014, 05:44 PM
Let me explain. I sometimes like to touch folks that I'm talking with one on one. Pat a guy on the shoulder or back. Touch a woman's arm or hand. I do it without thinking.

When dressed in drab, I can tell they may be uncomfortable with that and I don't go there again.:straightface:

However, when dressed and doing the same thing? I don't receive the same negative energy I do in drab. Even if I hug the other person.:hugs: And, I'm not just talking about other trans/CDs either.

Anyone else get what I'm saying?:eek:

wanagione
03-02-2014, 05:49 PM
I use touch also, I touch a person's hand or arm when I'm talking to them. I just have always done it, now that I think about it. I'm a nurse and I do it all the time.

Sheila11
03-02-2014, 08:26 PM
I touch as guy and girl and do not get a bad reaction either way. I am always subtle and careful not to smother or envelope the person.

CD Tammy
03-02-2014, 08:31 PM
I guess, I'm the odd one. I'm hesitant to invade one's personal space so I tend not to touch.

Rogina B
03-02-2014, 11:09 PM
You are so right Doc! Touching is an accepted girl thing and brings goodness with it!

AllieSF
03-02-2014, 11:16 PM
Yes, I am like that too. I don't think that I grew up that way. But my Ex is from South America and that is very common, the norm, the culture. So, I now do that in both modes and sometimes, yes, the others may be taken aback by that. When I notice that I try to back off. However, it is now so much of my "culture" and being that I often forget and keep doing that. It is part of who I am.

Beverley Sims
03-03-2014, 12:30 AM
Sherry,
I fully understand what you are saying, I have learned to accept feelers and touchers, it is their way of showing friendliness.
I do not mean the sleazes on the dance floor "touching you up" either. :)

I think you messed with Andrew O'Keefe's mind the other day too. :) :)

noeleena
03-03-2014, 04:38 AM
Hi,

For most of us its pretty normal, women that is and a few men dont mind though some set the boundy real quick.
I do express my self more fully and words dont allways convey my emotions so by touching is part of my interaction with people,

...noeleena...

Vickie_CDTV
03-03-2014, 07:01 AM
Personally, I don't touch a stranger unless I feel I have permission, even if I want to, it is how I was raised I suppose. Maybe it is not just a cultural but a generational thing, when I was little growing up there was great emphasis on "keep your hands to yourself" and not to touch others without permission (it was an era where things like sexual harassment, child abuse, fears about AIDS etc. were in the headlines and a national concern) and "touching" in general was considered a risky thing.

switcheralso
03-03-2014, 07:10 AM
I also typically touch peoaple it might be there are or just a small pat on the back. I have never had any issues with this and I have always done it but I am also truly sincere when I touch.

Teresa
03-03-2014, 07:20 AM
I've never had a problem touching people had to do it all the time with my photography, done in the right way it can help and reassure them. I would often hold the bride at a wedding to show the groom how to pose with her. Never had a single issue when photographing children. I've never been in a situation to touch people dressed but I don't think I would be any different.

Krisi
03-03-2014, 08:06 AM
I think in the Western culture, women tend to be "touchy" while men are not. Perhaps it's because women are percieved to be non threatening while men may be considered a threat. Men shake hands, women hug.

Felicia Dee
03-03-2014, 08:48 AM
I do find I am more "touchy" en femme than when I'm not... I hug more... will often link arms with someone, etc. I'm just so much more comfortable in my own skin as a woman, I stop being so self conscious and just relax and be me. Obviously, every situation is different, but I find that people respond positively if I'm relaxed and genuine... <3

Lynn Marie
03-03-2014, 11:35 AM
It's pretty well understood that most women find us non-threatening in drag. In fact, very often, they're really fascinated with us. So there is a higher level of acceptance and intimacy right from the start, and this applies to many men also. The illusion, well presented, simply fools the brain of so many people even though they know down deep who we really are! It's simply amazing.

carhill2mn
03-03-2014, 02:17 PM
Yes, I get it. Society is much more accepting of being touched by a woman than by a man.

Bria
03-03-2014, 03:18 PM
I grew up in a rather staid family where men didn't hug or express much emotion. Men only shook hands. Women huged and kissed. As a child I didn't like the hugs from strangers or relatives, it was OK from Mom. As I have gotten older I have grown more accustom to hugs with other guys and cheek kisses with women. Having five daughters has helped.

When I'm dressed hugs seem more routine and less tramatic for me. It's hard to over come early habits, I wish I was more outgoing but I'm working on it!

Hugs Bria

natcrys
03-03-2014, 03:35 PM
I noticed I was already doing this in boy-mode .. but dressing up and meeting and talking other people really made me lose any hesitations I had about social touching.

As many probably will confirm,.. it makes it so much easier to really connect to people! :)

Now, what I heard was that Finnish people are one of the least touchiest people out there.. with like a personal space of a few square metres. Any Finnish CD's here to confirm that?? :tongueout

sometimes_miss
03-03-2014, 04:05 PM
I actually got a warning at work for this; when helping a new employee, I put my hand on her opposite shoulder while leaning over her right shoulder and using the mouse on her computer to show her what to do. Next day I get called into the office by our manager, saying that she had complained about being touched by me. So now I don't touch ANYBODY.

Lillyasia
03-03-2014, 04:08 PM
This is a touchy subject. Sorry, couldn't resist.:devil:

I don't like people (strangers) touching me unless it is necessary for something in their line of work. I believe in "keep your hands to yourself." I always ask before I touch something at someone else's house. I consider it respect for others and their property.

If it is someone I know, then it is okay as a social norm seems to be friendly hugs these days.

teri g
03-03-2014, 08:11 PM
I can't comment on touching while dressed but as a male I touch both genders regularly, but only those I know. I am sensitive to subtle reactions and can't remember the last negative one. I wouldn't touch anyone (other than a handshake or reciprocal hug) I didn't already know. I limit the touching to the upper arm and shoulder area.

DAISY LYNN DOKES
03-03-2014, 09:04 PM
The touch of footsie is a heartstopper for me in stockings

Samantha_Smile
03-04-2014, 05:39 PM
I tend to be more respectful of peoples personal square footage.
If its a friend, sure, touch away.
Stranger? Not a chance.