Remember how you felt the first time you went en femme?

[bittersweet]

I felt liberated! Like something inside of me unlocked, and I naturally slipped into girl mode quickly. I caught myself smiling uncontrollably while emulating stereotypical feminine traits like upping my voice to sound more girly and being such an exaggerated female to the point of being a caricature lol.

So how did you feel the first time you dressed and all dolled up?

[Adriana Moretti]

I was nervous ( i just explained my first outting in another thread so no need for me to repeat it) but I will say this.....I felt GREAT after..and was proud of myself..and realized I just opened up a brand new chapter in my life.

[noeleena]

Hi.

Im not sure about this dolled up detail, i knew people would look at me for sure, i know some would have thought i was a male, others were not bothered, I was more bothered about being accepted as normal ( history for that,)

So what i did was tell every one i knew what was going on and when they saw me they would know what to expect, i was not trying to hide who i was though i did use my wig to sort of hide my face, very little makeup ,

The difference for myself was not trying to be like someone else or even emulate some one, it was this is who i am the real person, as i said i was more bothered about being accepted my fear if you like, of rejection i had years of that so it coloured my perception of myself .

voice and being girly , being girly no did not happen and for voice i was not that bothered, not then and yes i talked with a lot of people it was not an issue,

I saw it as well this is it lets get this on the road and go for it,

...noeleena...

[Hell on Heels]

I don't remember the first time feeling. But after a long period of not dressing, and recently returning it was like a first time again for me. It felt so good, and looking in the mirror and seeing what I thought was a real work of art, my emotions started going haywire. I was extremely happy and excited, then wondering how I could have denied it for so long made me angry that I had. I also wondered where I would be at with this today if I had continued CD'ing from that very first time. And finally as the night was ending, and time came to erase my art, one final look in the mirror made me sad that I couldn't be Kristyn more often, and didn't know when she'd be back.

[Beverley Sims]

I was with friends and it always seemed natural from day one.
I was as scared as hell on many of those early occasions, especially if I went solo or with minimal support.

[I Am Paula]

My first time out felt liberating, and like I'd found myself. When I think back to what I was wearing, and my amateurish makeup, I cringe. Oh well, we have to start somewhere. It was Halloween, 1982, at what was then Toronto's only gay bar.

[Krisi]

I never had a "first time all dolled up". For me it was gradual and over a period of years. Even my going out of the house was gradual. Going out for a drive underdressed in a bra and putting water balloons in after I got away from home, doing the same with the addition of a wig and blouse at night and so on.

At this point, it feels perfectly natural to me to wear my boobs, wig and padding around the house. Outside is still different and exciting but I don't get to do it often.

[Jackie7]

Terrified and exhilarated and feeling right inside myself, all at the same time.

[Lexi Moralas]

My first time was terrifying, liberating, all at the Same time.

[marshalynn]

My first time out, I wore my mother's pink sun dress with white small polkadots, very small thin shoulder straps, it fit me perfectly, white three inch strappy sandals and makeup, I walked out our 200 ft drive way to our mail box, I can remember it like it was yesterday, I was twelve years old, that was only 58 years ago... some things you just never forget. I feel the same now when I dress, now I dress about 99% of the time.

[Allisa]

If it wasn't for my forms and bra my heart would have exploded from my chest. But truly freeing and natural, start of a new chapter in my life. Wish I had started early but that's water under the bridge.


Bye-Bye Lisa

[Lorileah]

My first time was 17 years ago...to a lesbia...I mean womyn's bar with my GG GF. It was fun and quiet and the staff treated us really well. On the way home we were asked (at a stop light) for directions to a street. We heard them wrong and sent them to a different street....I wonder if they are still out there :thinking:

[dana digs sweaters]

At what age? Young and in school for Halloween and then Trick-or-Treating afterwards?
As an adult? Walking in heels on the sidewalk. The sound of my heels on the pavement.
Feeling my makeup on my face. The slickness of the lipstick.
Blinking while wearing false eyelashes. My wig surrounding my face and tickling the back of my neck.
The weight of my falsies in my bra moving/bouncing as I walked.
The coolness under my skirt as it moved while walking.
My grip on my purse.
Fun to experience no matter the age.

[Sallee]

I do it was to a drag club an hour away and I had to drive and get gas on the way back. It was all pretty exciting It had to be more than 40 yrs ago. The drag club was scary all the queens were wanting me to come up on stage but they weren't pressing to hard. The gas was hard it wasn't self service and I had to be told to shut the car off.
The whole experience was pretty fun and exciting and they still are. Although I think I am a little more in control now It still remains fun.

[Stephanie47]

I saw it as a progression. The first couples of times I went out fully en femme including wig and makeup was for a neighborhood drive. I was really apprehensive. I was fearful a drunk driver would purposely seek me out and t-bone my car. I think back on those late night trips and wonder if I was really fooling my wife. It took time to apply makeup including doing my nails, dressing in the other bathroom, leaving the house, driving, returning home and undoing the feminine side. Thinking back on it, although she is a really sound sleeper, in retrospect, she had to know. So much for DADT.

There were two Halloweens that I fully dressed. Not as a princess, but, a stylish young (I was young once) woman. I intended to encounter humans and I did. I guess one can do anything on Halloween. I got some laughter from some young guy who was obviously headed to a state of drunkenness, and, a compliment from the night female worker at a Winchell's doughnut store. I felt at ease.

[Helen_Highwater]

I can't remember the details of what I wore but it was most likely "borrowed" as at that time I hadn't any stuff of my own. I drove a short way from where I lived late one night and went for a walk around a local park and church grounds. All the things the safety rules say don't do. How did I feel? Gut wrenchingly scared, paranoid that there was a gang of morons around every corner waiting to get me but also slightly elated. Many talk of feeling liberated and much later on I too have experienced that sensation but for this first time more relief that I had actually done it and survived.

In some ways the fact that I don't get to go out that often means that when I do I recapture some of those early feelings.

[ShelbyDawn]

I will let you know. I believe Friday is the night... :)

[Kristy 56]

I sure do. Excitement,fear and adrenaline all flowing at the same time. I still remember driving and seeing my nylon covered legs and thinking how I'm really doing this . :)

[Megan b]

Yes I do, it was great. It was the scariest thing and the funnest thing I had ever done. It was a Sunday night after church, went to Wal-Mart about 40 miles from my house. I went by myself, thought everyone there knew I was a guy but I did it anyway. I just browsed the store looking at shoes and clothes, trying not to draw to much attention to myself. I even called the store after I got home and asked them if anyone thought their was a guy in there dressed as a woman. The lady that answered the phone said they didn't know. So I took that as a win. I was hooked after that, although I did not go out again for about 3 years. I go out fairly regularly now and gain confidence each time.

[kimdl93]

The first time...well, there were many firsts over all too many years. But what really tipped the balance was the first time I dressed entirely as a woman, with wig, make up, shaper was....suddenly I saw a completely different image of myself and for the first time believed that I could do this! It was a transcendent moment.

[Ivy Lee]

it was scary at first and took getting used to (i was wearing a skirt and feeling air rush up was weird to me haha). I was so glad i did, after a while it felt so natural and noticing attention was a great self esteem builder

[Kate Simmons]

My first extended time out was on my way to my first Renaissance TG group meeting almost 14 years ago. I felt euphoria but a tad nervous as well. Mostly I kept feeling that if some guy tried to hit on me, I would have to restrain myself from decking him. :heehee:The things that go through your mind at those times!:battingeyelashes::)

[*Cindy*]

My first time was about 40 years ago. It was after I had been to auto service training, in Detroit and I was on my way home about 350 miles away so I no one I knew would see me so I felt safe that way. I was young, about 20, and wanted to try on some dresses at a upscale shopping center at a young ladies boutique. At the time I had long light brown hair and couldn't grow facial hair and a very skinny feminine body and was wearing girls tight jeans, nylons, panties, and bra, with a tight ladies sweater, I thought I looked hot. I was afraid that the sales ladies wouldn't let me try any dresses on and call the police and have me arrested. I remember this was in the early 70's and back then it was all redneck thinking about transgender issues, and only occasionally would you find any thing written about crossdressing and it always gave me a rush to read about it back then, lol, who am I kidding, it still gives me a rush today and even as I write about that experience. WOW, that feminine feeling just rips' me. Well, to make a long story short, I went in look around and found a couple of sexy short dresses and asked the sales lady if I could try them on and she said yes and ask if that was all as she let me in the dressing room. I may have looked like a young lady to her as some of my friends in high school said I would make a good looking girl. Told her that was all and went in and tried them on. I listened to her as she walked away to talk to the other sale girl to see if see would say anything to her but she didn't. I was in the dressing room for what seemed like an hour when she return and ask if the size was ok and I said yes, it was actually too big but I was afraid to let her see me dressed if she ask to get me a smaller one of that style. I finished trying on but didn't buy anything, and they thanked me for coming in and to come back. That day is what I really needed to help me fell good about dressing and not being afraid to try on whatever I want and whenever.

[Felicia Dee]

It was the most fulfilling, single most defining moment of my life. When I had to go back to being a boy, I cried.

[Eryn]

The first time I dressed up fully (clothes, hair, makeup) was a trial run for a coming outing with a CDing group. I mostly remember how hard it was to get the makeup right. Every step required thought and care. Frankly, it was not all that pleasant, though it was really worth it when Mimi, who was out of town at the time, replied "you really look great" when I sent her a picture of myself.

My first time out was terrifying. I was alone (Mimi was still out of town) and I drove 60 miles on LA freeways to the restaurant. I parked for a few minutes to work up the courage to approach the restaurant. The first person who saw me in person dressed was the valet parking attendant. He opened my door for me, said "Good evening Ma'am" and handed me the ticket. From that point on it was smooth sailing!

[Diane Edwards]

While I had been dressing for a little over three years at the time, my first real foray out into public en femme was during my friend Jo's 18th birthday. She wanted to celebrate officially becoming an adult and being able to legally drink. (For those of you much younger than me, the legal drinking age back in 1974 was 18.) Since I had turned 18 about 6 months earlier than her, I was already 'legal', so we decided to go to a club to celebrate. Jo convinced me to go out as Diane because she wanted to go to an underground lesbian bar she'd heard about in Boston and knew it would be easier for me if I was female. It took her a while to convince me, but in the end I gave in.

I took a lot of time getting ready, working hard to make sure I'd pass muster. After all the coaching and help Jo had given me over the previous 3-plus years to improve my appearance and deportment, I knew I could pull it off. But this would be the first real test in public, and in a crowded club at that.

We almost hit a snag, though: my ID. I couldn't use 'Diane' as my name because it didn't match my ID and I wanted to have a couple of drinks with Jo at the club. But the solution was simple. I've posted in another thread that my male name is androgynous, so I decided we'd use it for just that evening out. It helped that the photo showed me with long hair and my drab appearance in the photo looked androgynous as well. I figured we could pull it off despite my ID identifying me as an 'M' rather than an 'F'.

Once we were in her car heading into Boston my nerves kicked in. I felt both exhilarated and nervous at the same time and I couldn't sit still. More than once Jo had to calm me down, knowing I was nervous because I had turned into a chatterbox. It wasn't until we were parking her car on one of the side streets near the club that I felt calm. Then came the moment of truth. It was time to go inside.

I almost didn't go in, but Jo grabbed my hand and we headed into the club. After a quick check of ID's at the door (the bouncer didn't even look twice at me or my ID), we were inside. And just that quick I was in a club full of women who were there to have a good time. In a few minutes I had a drink in hand and Jo and I found a free table and sat down. We met and talked with a number of women while we were there, danced with a few, and more than one tried to pick me up! But Jo was there with me and on one occasion when a tipsy woman wouldn't take 'No' for an answer, she solved the problem by stepping between me and the drunk woman and giving me one hell of a kiss! She then said something to her about 'staying the hell away from my girlfriend!' That was about the only incident that made me feel uncomfortable that night, but it didn't diminish the rush I felt being out in public as Diane for the first time.

[suspender]

I felt liberated! Like something inside of me unlocked, and I naturally slipped into girl mode quickly. I caught myself smiling uncontrollably while emulating stereotypical feminine traits like upping my voice to sound more girly and being such an exaggerated female to the point of being a caricature lol.

So how did you feel the first time you dressed and all dolled up?

The first time was great. I didn't leave my house!

For the answer you are probably after (ie, when I first went out), nothing short of s*#t scared! I got over that quickly when I realised people were very accepting even in the manliest of places...:)

[Alice B]

Scared you know what ....less and excited at the same time.Lots of emotions that calmed down and had a great time.

[queenie]

My first time was heart stoppingly scary and absolutely liberating all at the same time. No words to describe it at all.

[bittersweet]

I've read everyone's responses so far and they're great! I could identify with almost every post here and in others I gained a glimpse into another's perspective which is always nice. I look forward to reading more :)

[Julie Denier]

For me, it was both exhilarating and scary when I fully dressed for the first time about 3 1/2 years ago, after experimenting piecemeal for years. Despite my desires, I always felt I was too tall, too big, too fat, too large of foot and gut to make dressing up worth the effort. But I finally had to satisfy my curiosity, and I liked what I saw and loved how I felt, when the dress, lingerie, hosiery, shoes, makeup and wig all came together. I've been dressing on and off since then; I've lost weight, refined my outfit selection, improved my makeup, got a more suitable wig -- and though I don't go out, I reached a point where I didn't feel that dressing was a waste of time -- I could look and feel pretty despite my size and shape. I've been on hiatus for about six months, but I'm really feeling the urge to get back at it ...

[Lillyasia]

First time out en femme for me was about two months ago. I went to JC Penney to visit a couple of SAs I know. I was nervous as is the case with first time anything, but it was exhilarating at the same time.

I felt confident I could do this. At the parking lot I paused a minute to check hair but not so long as to create doubt. Then I stepped out of the vehicle and it was "for real." I walked into the store and looked for my friend and did some shopping. I enjoyed myself and the experience put me on cloud 9.

[Diane Edwards]

After rereading the original post I realized I had misread/misunderstood Bittersweet's question. My bad.

To answer the actual question, I have to say that I don't remember the exact first time I was en femme. For me it started with one or two clothing items when the rest of my family wasn't around. That was when I was 10 or 11 years of age. It progressed from there until I was about 13 or 14, which was when I fully dressed for the first time. It felt good, It felt right. I felt sexy and sexually stimulated at the same time. And I finally saw Diane in the mirror for the first time. But it wasn't until I was 15 or 16 that my friend Jo helped me dress better, learn about makeup, and helped me start working on my voice. The first time I was 'all up' I almost didn't recognize myself. All I saw was Diane, she who had been hiding away inside. When I saw myself then I knew that I probably should have been her all along.

Does that make sense to any of you out there?

[bridget01]

Terrified someone would recognize me, a friend ask my wife who was driving our car, have a road accident or I would get a photographed traffic infringement in the mail. Other than that it was so exciting to be browsing and trying on girly things whilst shopping enfemme. Being properly fitted for a bra and sexy suspender bustier set, it was absolutely wonderful being treated like any other lady customer, the store assistants were so nice and helpful, gave me a big discount too. But came home very relieved, thinking that so many things could have gone wrong and I was so lucky nothing did.

[NathalieX66]

My first experience was at a support group meeting at a hotel near a military base, where me and my group were drinking at the hotel lounge/bar with army & air force people in their fatigues. We in dresses & heels. They were so cool. The occasion was so random. That's what changed everything for me.

[ShelbyDawn]

My first experience as tonight and I had a really nice time.
I got a makeover at MAC and got my nails done, bought a new outfit and a gorgeous wig and went to a local gender friendly bar.
I met some really nice people, and even had the bartender flirt with me a bit. I kinda think he would have done this if I had been in drab, too. :)
I actually felt very comfortable, possibly more so than if I had been dressed in drab.

I will be going out again...

The only problem I am having is that bit is now almost 2 in the morning and I don't want to get undressed. :)

:hugs:

Shelby

[Abbey11]

Hi, the first time I got dolled up was liberating, it was a wonderful feeling putting on a flowing dress the feel of it around my legs was like nothing I had felt before, then the heels. I had worn heels before so was used to walking around in them and like many it was my first step (no pun intended:ner:) towards dressing and wanting to become and release that women inside of me, once I had the hair and the makeup on I was blown away and I did she'd a tear or 2 it really was a magical moment .... Now all of that was locked away in my home.......The 1st time I ventured outside was very nerve racking but like many of you ladies I took those deep breaths and off I went and just want to be out more and more
Hugs
Abbey xx

[bittersweet]

All I saw was Diane, she who had been hiding away inside. When I saw myself then I knew that I probably should have been her all along.

Does that make sense to any of you out there?

I feel you :) When I look into the mirror it's almost like seeing a complete stranger, but at the same time it feels so right. It feels like this is how it should be. I see a different face, but I see a part of myself as well.

[adrienner99]

I wasn't just nervous. I was terrified. I dressed conservatively--casual blue sweater, grey skirt, mid-heels. Went to a drag bar in a horrible part of town. Over the next months I gained a bit of confidence and went to the same bar wearing a red silk blouse, black satin skirt, black patent five inch heels, and searing red lipstick. To my astonishment, a big, manly gay guy hit me up, bought me a drink and sort of flirted with me. That's as far as it went. But it was quite something. I doubt I will ever completely get over the fear, but it does get better...

[mariehart]

The first time I went out dressed in girls clothes was in my teens. But it wasn't in public. I went out several times as a teenager but I can't remember which was first. I did sneak out late at night while everyone in the house was asleep while wearing my sister's blue dress. But I didn't stray far. Mostly I sneaked out wearing male clothes over the top and then took them off somewhere quiet which was all a bit silly.

But the real first time in public and fully dressed and made up I do remember vividly. There was a crossdressing group in town and I finally got up the nerve to join them. I didn't really have a good outfit to wear so I 'borrowed' one of my younger sisters suits, which tells you thin I was at the time. It had a saw tooth pattern and stylish pencil skirt. I had my own really pretty polo neck top which went well with it plus some fake pearls and my own set of high heels size 6 (US size 7 or 8? ). I had no wig though. But when I arrived everyone was really friendly and someone loaned me a fabulous blonde wig.

I caused a bit of a stir because frankly I looked good and very feminine. Someone even took a photo. I would love to see that picture now! They were heading out to a gay bar and I was convinced to go along. This was a day of firsts. The first time I was dressed in front of others and the first time in public.

I remember walking out into the street in company with one of the other girls. Just the two of us. It was a really out of body experience. Nervous but at the same time it felt completely normal. At one point we were whistled at which I absolutely loved. When we got to the bar I was elated. Another first was meeting a TS in the pub. She did seem a bit sad though.

I didn't walk back but was driven back later by one of the others. It was a thrilling night and I looked forward to doing it again. Sadly it wasn't to be and while I did go out dressed again. It was always alone and secretly. I did go out in daylight once but it was a rainy day and I hid behind an umbrella avoiding everyone. Pity really.

[NewAmanda]

I think I would be afraid to be out dressed a female publicly. Maybe fear if being seen by someone I know. I hope one day to be able to get there

I hope to find the same liberation you did!

[Candice Mae]

I was a nervous wreck, I remember being worried about every little thing. Every person, car, animal, shadow, noise and even trees scared me. When I got home from my short walk, my make up was a clammy mess, my push up bra was soaked, and my heart was going 200 pbm.