Mover or sitter?

[Kate Simmons]

This is mostly for those who go out to clubs en femme and interact with others but anyone may comment. When you go to a CD friendly (or any) club do you just sit there like a wall flower or interact with others and have fun? I started doing that when I came out long ago but it got old pretty fast just sitting there drinking at the bar or table. I soon found my dancing shoes and learned to swing the booty. Now I can't see going into a club without dancing and socializing. When I dance I kind of echo Shania Twain's song, "Feel like a woman". In fact that is one of my favorites to dance to along with Pat Benatar's "Hit me with your best shot" So, how do you fare with regard to this and do you have fun? :)

[Jordan]

I am a sitter as I have two left feet

[kimdl93]

Definitely a sitter. I never have liked to dance. The music is NOT in me.

[BillieAnneJean]

There are a lot of interesting people out there. A lot of really nice and accepting people. And a lot of wounded people. I like to interact and give out hugs as needed. It is nothing more than a fellow traveler understanding another's need for kindness. This has no bearing on what I am wearing.

I do not like to dance just flailing around. So I talked my SO in to learning how to ballroom dance. It took many years to talk her in to that. I can swing her around and she can not contain her joy as her smile is from ear to ear. I like that.

But the odd thing is I don't mind the fanny wiggling and flowing movements of the flailing "dancing" when enfemme. No fantasies about men, though.

I am a member of The Grand Rapids Crossdresser Social Group, "Grand Illusions" and when we go to a club we socialize with each other. But the odd thing is other, non CDer people are, for some reason, interacting with us. The women compliment our outfits, shoes, nail color. I have had young guys in the company of accepting young women, young guys who have also been quite accepting. They have also been quite social. No negative experiences after almost a year and a half.

So the short answer (sorry) is interacting, socializing, and dancing.

Get OUT! Have FUN! Find a group. Experience your dreams. It is all out there and possible. If you start with the first step.
Billie

[cdinmd206]

Depends on the place and my mood. Sometimes a wall flower and others time the social butterfly.

[Adriana Moretti]

can I be both ??? LOL...I will usually start out near the bar ( obviously ).. and have a few drinks to get comfy, I am always still a little shy at first..I will feel out the room and the energy, see whats goin on......once my hips get moving its a different story...dancing is one of my favorite things to do! Either out or at home when nobody is watching

[Erica Marie]

You nailed it with the term wallflower. Even in male mode I am always shy and ackward meeting new people and dancing was never my strong point. I can sit and enjoy everything that goes on around me.

[natcrys]

I do like to shaky my booty even if I'm not much of a dancer. My musical tastes lie more in the areas of metal, rock, blues, jazz music (mainly guitar).. but give me good beat and I will try to dance!

Thing is.. I also love to chat.. and talk and listen to others.. preferably with drink in my hand! So yeah.. a bit of both! :D

[Katey888]

But the odd thing is I don't mind the fanny wiggling and flowing movements of the flailing "dancing" when enfemme. No fantasies about men, though.


Same for me Billie - with just one adjustment.... I ONLY like to dance, flailing around... It's not too dangerous in the home environment though, generally the kitchen, and I am getting better at constraining my wild side... :)

And yes - I'd love to get out one day...

Katey x

[Lorileah]

I am more into S&M...I stand and model

[Kate Simmons]

As Katey said, sometimes it's hard to restrain myself. I sometimes find myself while going down the aisles in the grocery store rocking out to the 60's, 70's and 80's music they play.:battingeyelashes::)

[stephNE]

I'm a sitter, no dancing here, but I'm not a wallflower. I occasionally meet others in a CD meetup for drinks, dinner, etc, and we always have a lot of good conversation.

[Kate Simmons]

I have another bit of motivation for my moving on the dance floor. I guess deep in the back of my mind I figure... How can "they" bounce if I don't move around? ;):heehee:Guess there is a subtle reason for everything. :)

[KaceyR]

I have yet to see if a club would find me on the dance floor as Kacey.
In my life though I've wallflowered way too much..
I mean, I know I can dance. I grew up square dancing, polka, waltzes, some round dancing from age ...single digit somewhere up to 18. (My grandpa was a caller - and later I played drums for the band then during it...heck even I still can fully remember and could call a couple myself). Heh..could probably even put on a flapper outfit and do a Charleston (mom taught/did that when I was young. I've ballroom danced a couple times with some from a SCA group (Renaissance recreation).
Not sure what happened tho...once out of the house on my own I got more and more solitary and antisocial I guess. Over last 20 years on the rare times I'd get out with my mom and her friend to a country dance-I just sat drinking the beer and listening to the music. I DJ'ed some and was involved with dance and disco music...but stopped the dancing. 10 years ago I was best man at a wedding and danced a bit there (especially as I had to with the matron of honor). But missed out on a good thing I guess.. Was too socially inept to realize both enjoyed it-and to see her interest too I guess. Even her parents thought we were a good couple. But after the dance or 2 I went back to wallflower mode and that was it.

In some aspects Kacey has helped me push thru a lot of boundaries...and I guess since it's gotten kind of later in life (49 in Jul) I've just kind of shifted to a 'to heck with it' attitude and barrel forward with plowing thru a lot of 'scary stuff' (fears, cares about what others think, etc). So we'll see what happens at a club sometime.

Besides... R-Arthritis runs high in the family (and is already showing). Better get my groove on while I still can :)

[Alice B]

If I were to get up and dance it would have to be at the comedy club because it would be pure comedy. Thus I'm a sitter, but love meeting and taking to people and often start the conversation.

[Beverley Sims]

I was a great mover and shaker once. :)

[Jess Marie]

I go to a nightclub in Syracuse called Trexx. The place is great. Drag shows every night! So, the place is naturally very accepting of cd's and I always have a great time with my friends dancing around. I've even grinded on some men (for the old folk, grinding is that new age butt to genitals dancing the kids are doing these days). It is always a great time!

[Jennifer S]

I'd like to be a mover but first I'll need a sitter. Any takers? I'll pay $6 an hour and you can eat whatever you find in the fridge...

[MsVal]

I am the kind that socializes easily. I will find a busy table and 10 minutes later have 8 new, albeit temporary friends.
Dancing - well - I've been compared unfavorably to a spastic spider monkey. I'm working on it, but realistically, a couple hours of self study per month isn't going to make me much better.

Best wishes
MsVal

[audreyinalbany]

when it comes to dancing, I'm pretty much like Elaine Benes

[DonnaT]

I'd walk around and interact, and also get in a few games of pool.

However, I never learned to dance, and since the dance floor was one level up, didn't worry about anyone asking me to dance.

[Algoma]

I am shy, and don't always mix as I really want to. I enjoy getting on the dance floor, got over that I can't really dance.

[Kate Simmons]

Many times I just make it up as I go along Algoma. :battingeyelashes::)

[sherri]

I was a shrinking violet at first, and being a naturally shy person it's still hard for me to initiate interaction, but I respond well to overtures and luv to dance.

[Jaylyn]

I love dancing and gyrating around and trying all the moves but only in my man cave when I'm dressed. Funny I have never been to a club dressed but in male mode my wife and I love dancing. I do love getting all dressed up at home plugging in the old electric guitar and playing some great old sixties songs. I have some big forms that just seem to bounce and love how they feel in the cut out on top of the guitar. When I used to play some with a band all in male mode I would always dance some in the breaks. Music is a something I enjoy and can get lost in just like the dressing. For some odd reason I love playing my guitar in sexy high heels and short skirts... Dressed in full.

[AZashleemarie]

I am typically a sitter, but if someone engages me I will open up and hang out. Last time I went out dressed I went into a lesbian bar (which is open and accepting to cds though) and sat by the mega touch and just played a game or two and sipped my beer. A gg accross the bar asked why I am sitting alone and invited me to join her, there were literally only like 5 people in the bar at the time. She was extremely comlimentary of my makeup and outfit and we made small talk for about a 1/2 hour. She then got me to get off my butt and go play pool with her, and even gave me crap about being girlier than her when I was reapplying lip gloss and didn't notice it was my shot. We met a super cute gg and played pool with the three of us, (unfortunately no fantasies were fulfilled of a three way or anything like that lol). Finally after a few drinks and a redbull and a water I had to leave, anyone who knows the phoenix area knows that they are very strict on DUIs so I did not want to take any chances, especially en femme as no one I know that would bail me out knows about ashlee. In the end it was a great night, but yeah like others have said I am shy and kind of keep to myself, but if someone engages me I have a blast and can be very sociable, just not good at breaking the ice and starting a conversation with random people.

[Cheryl T]

I'm a sitter with regard to dancing, but I'm no wallflower when it comes to mixing and chatting people up.

[KristinaP]

Only been to one social so far. I was so nervous as this was my first public outing and I was worried about who I would come across. Needless to say- first group of people we met there had a couple that I used to work with. They were totally cool but I was such a wreck that I sat in the darkest corner :(

Next time will be better

[noeleena]

Hi,

I think most know me well enough ,

So how about a shifter mover doer and go get er alls ways on the move,

For myself the venue will be a bit different, as it was this week end, friday night 55 of us all dressed up in Edwardian clothes, for a High Tea, English style.

saturday night some 60 of us dressed a bit different more as a English evening 4 coruse meal and enterainment that was had in Africa 1900 -14 so the men would wear Millitay uniforms and Ladies in very lovely evening wear as i was, my Ball gown,

Saterday afternoon was a dress in a picnic setting ant a lovely park and thier tables of food were Judged on who was done to great effect, about 90 people came,

i help set up and take down after the event, and most of the day ill have talked to every one and took some 600 shots, of the different detail we were doing in the best dressed man and woman .

The Theme for the week end was Out of Africa so the venue was decked out accordingly part of my detail as well. Oh it was a lovely week end and a bit specal as well for me.

...noeleena...

[Rogina B]

I've even grinded on some men (for the old folk, grinding is that new age butt to genitals dancing the kids are doing these days). It is always a great time!

I used to refer to that as the "Trini butt grind" when we lived in Trinidad. Now,I am trying to hone my Miley Cyruslike "Twerking" skills...My daughter and wife say that I have a ways to go on that before I can "publicly Twerk"..lol! Life is short,so have fun when you are out and anytime you can let go!

[Lynn Marie]

I'm genuinely interested in people and greatly enjoy encouraging them. That, plus being naturally outgoing and an average swing dancer pretty much makes me a mover who enjoys sitting and talking!

[Sassyinheels]

I am so shy - definitely a sitter. This last weekend i went to a CD gathering that held a cd prom contest - to which i entered. I was so nervous walking on the stage and in front of a crowd, but glad I overcame that!
People would come over with compliments on my look, shoes, etc but I just freeze :/
I would love to change and am trying to work on it:)

[Kate Simmons]

Well, I was definitely no "sitter" this past Saturday at the club, especially since I hadn't been there in awhile. I danced for pretty much three hours straight (alone) before taking a break. Then other folks started to filter out on the floor and move their booties. Great time. :battingeyelashes::)