Almost dropped the trans word.

[Tracii G]

I was eating dinner with the bass player in the band I work for last night and almost came out to him.
We were at a quaint little Greek restaurant which was super awesome BTW.
I had on my usual girls jacket, jeans,tennis shoes and a femme bracelet.
I had rolled my hair earlier so from the back it was easy to think female I'm sure.
We were eating dinner and a group of girls and one lone trans guy(dressed enfemme) came in and were standing in line waiting to order their food.
I noticed the trans guy right off and smiled when he looked my way in a smile of solidarity.
One of the girls in the group looked over and poked her GF and whispered "hey look I think its a trans guy sitting right there".They both smiled and I smiled back.
My friend noticed this I think but never said anything bad about the trans guy.
Is he accepting? who knows maybe.
We chatted as guys do about the nice looking girls in the place and enjoyed our dinner.
I was soo close to just dropping T bomb but didn't.

[kimdl93]

The way you describe yourself, he's gotta have a pretty good idea. Seems like you're about 70-80 percent out already.

[PaulaQ]

Uh yeah, hon, what kim said. You are a lot further out than you acknowledge.

[Jorja]

No worries, Tracii. You dress in women's clothing and curl your hair. I would bet he knows something is different about you. At this point, I would not come out and reveal it unless he says something about it to you. He obviously doesn't mind being seen with you. Just enjoy the company.

[MarcellaMcNul]

I have to agree with the others Tracii, often, you post on how you present as pretty much androgynous/gender ambiguous when you're not full out boogying and the people you associate with seem to have no problem accepting you for who you are. Maybe there is no need for you to preach to the choir unless someone else wants to bring it up.

[Beverley Sims]

Tracii,
It sounds hypocritical but I think sometimes silence is better for our survival.
After all do you need to wake up tomorrow and deal with all the BS that can be created?

We are talking about 30 pieces of silver here.

[reb.femme]

The way you describe yourself, he's gotta have a pretty good idea. Seems like you're about 70-80 percent out already.

Made me titter, but I think this is very much the case.

As you say Tracii, "....I had on my usual girls jacket, jeans,tennis shoes and a femme bracelet. I had rolled my hair earlier so........." He was in a very public arena with a friend dressed to all intents, en femme. I would be absolutely gob smacked if he isn't accepting of you. Seems you have a nice life and friends going on there :)


......We are talking about 30 pieces of silver here.

Did I miss the bit about the Pirates?


Rebecca

[Tracii G]

You all make solid points I see where you are coming from.
You can add nail polish sometimes around them.
Oh and having Nicole Erin show up at a show in Indy .She did look fabulous and great legs.:)
It all makes sense in a way.

[CynthiaD]

Just show up in a skirt one day, and act like it's no big deal. See what he does then. (Well, perhaps not.) :)

[Alice Joyce]

I think you are going about your Girly side in a nice way. It is nice going out wearing your fem clothes that are not to "obviously Fem". You can feel really good without being too scared. It also allows folk to understand who you are/What you are about without being confronted by you in fully blown clothes make etc. WT Alice

[Tracii G]

I just play it by ear most of the time.
I've been comfy so far for the last 5 6 years dressing that way.
I never hide femme items in my home office like nail polish or ear rings that happen to be there.
He has seen that before I'm sure.

[kimdl93]

Come to think of it, you don't need to talk the talk if you're already walking the walk. Just keep on keepin on!

[flatlander_48]

You have 2 or 3 data points that all seem to be in the same positive direction.The question would be whether or not a purpose would be served by completely outing yourself to your friend. You can't unring a bell, but sometimes there is no need...

[Krisi]

Since this is job related, I wouldn't come out to him unless he asked. Some musicians are very accepting. Others are just as predudiced as John Q. Public. I was reading a post on a musician forum once fom a musician who was fired the next day after admitting that he was Jewish.

[UNDERDRESSER]

I don't think you have to tell him, unless you want to, but I can imagine his response something along the lines of,

"Well, duh! Pass the beer jug please"

[Badtranny]

Come to think of it, you don't need to talk the talk if you're already walking the walk. Just keep on keepin on!

Yup.

Coming out is about being free from pretense, and if you're already free to be yourself, then the rest is just biographical.

The people that need to come out are the ones the would sit there and say "look at that fag" just so their buddy doesn't "think something". Those people need a therapist and a good shunning.

[Tracii G]

The times where people use the fag term towards me I just say I've been married twice and have two kids so that makes me gay?
That usually shuts down the argument.
I could still be gay but thats my business.

[flatlander_48]

What the population at large tends not to understand is that all of the things can occur at the same time. We can be married and have children, but also be gay or bisexual. They are not mutually exclusive, but many think that they are...