Using credit card with male name

[Michelle789]

Now that I'm starting to get out of the house presenting as female more often, and am trying to conduct real life as a woman and not just fun outings on Friday nights, I have a new concern. Up until now I always carry lots of cash so I haven't had to use a credit card. But seriously it can get annoying carrying too much cash, and sometimes it's just easier to pay with credit card or debit card. Sometimes I might make a purchase that is more than the amount of cash I have on me. And of course, in real life, we just have to face using credit cards, ATMs, and going to the bank.

So my question for everyone is, when you're out presenting as female, but your name and ID is still legally male, how do you get by paying with a credit card or a debit card with a male name on it? What happens if I'm asked for ID? If I'm not asked for ID and just use my card should I expect my bank to call me saying that a woman is trying to commit fraud by using my credit card or debit card? Will I need to tell my bank that I'm a transgender?

Keep in mind that in California a sales associate reserves the right to check for ID when paying for credit card, but not for debit card. In California you must also enter your zip code when using a credit card to buy gas.

Please everyone, how do you deal with the credit card dilemma?

Also, has anyone here faced the situation of going to an ATM, or inside a bank, while presenting as female, but still carrying a legal male name and ID? How do you deal with this. I am probably not at a point where I will need to walk inside a bank or use an ATM, but just in case.

Anyone who has faced the above situations, TS or CD or any other identity, MTF or FTM, and who lives in any US state or Canada, may answer.

[Barbara Ella]

I have been going out more and more the last several months, and have never been questioned about my male credit card.

Barbara

Maybe I look like a kept woman?

[Donna Joanne]

Michelle,

I got my bank to issue me a VISA debit card with just my first and middle initial on it. So when I sign Donna Jo, it matches the D.J. and I never get questioned. Also if you use as a debit card with a PIN the merchant never needs to see the card. Just a couple of suggestions.

[PaulaQ]

I've done this hundreds of times at this point - no one has ever questioned me.

[Persephone]

There are some ways to request an extra credit card in your femme name and some of the folks here can tell you how to do that. My one or two femme credit cards were independently issued in my femme name many years ago, which probably means I have a femme credit status and credit reports out there someplace.

In the U.S., so far as I know, it is basically impossible to get a debit card in your femme name unless you do a legal name change. Donna SWLA just described the same thing I did -- got my bank to do first initial only. Not perfect since my maleself and I have two different last names but best that I've been told can be done.

Wish I could figure out how to get my femme name on my checking accout and on my checks, but the U.S. government won't let banks do that either so far as I know.

What about one of those pre-pay debit cards you can buy at the 7-11 or other stores? Haven't used 'em but that might be a workable method.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Claire Cook]

I have credit cards issued in both my male and female names. My male name is the lead on the accounts and that is how the bills are paid. I think I used some excuse like "We'd like one for our daughter..." to get them. I've never had a problem using my Claire cards , except a couple of times when I've been asked for a photo ID. In that case I'll say "Oh, OK, in that case let's use this one" and show my male driver's license. That may get a raised eyebrow, but never a problem. Now that most places just have swipe machines, maybe this is unnecessary -- but my cards are some of the few things that have my Claire name on them.

I have had a couple of funny instances. Once my wife and I were traveling as two women and we stopped at a Holiday Inn for the night. I checked in, and used my male AmEx card to get the room. The desk clerk asked "Oh, is this your husband's credit card?" Well, no, it's mine.... I wear a wedding ring when dressed, and several times in Macy's the clerk has said "Thank you, Mrs. Cook, have a nice day." Indeed I did. :battingeyelashes:

[Cheryl T]

Ask for a second credit card in you femme name or as someone else suggested get one with just your initials.
I've been using one in my femme name here in Jersey for 10 years now without an issue.

[Ariamythe]

In my experience, debit cards aren't a problem because they never ask to look at them. You swipe at point-of-purchase, you key in your PIN, and you're done. So I usually do that or cash. Helps keep my debt down, too.

[AllieSF]

Just use your credit card as is and show them your male ID when requested. Unless you totally pass as a woman, no one will give you any trouble. I have been going out for more than 8 years now and have never had a problem in California, Las Vegas nor in Michigan when dressed as a woman and using my credit card. I have also been stopped by police twice once here in California and once in Michigan. Again, no problems at all and total professionalism on the policemen's side.

[BOBBI G.]

My checking account stays in my male name until I have is changed, but I sign as who I am, Bobbi. I only have a debit, Lost all Credit many years ago, so not a problem for me. Even when using the debit as a credit, I have never been questioned. Just lucky, I guess.

Bobbi

[Launa]

In Canada our credit cards have the chip in them that is very hard for anybody to use fraudulently unless they have it and know your password. We are really never asked for ID because it is much the same as a debit card with a chip. If I were to go into a bank for any reason I would say to the teller my ID doesn't always look exactly like me.lol
If you're going into renegotiate your mortgage then I suggest to go in dressed as the gender that you identify with.

[DebbieL]

I've been doing this for a while now. Since I started living 120/week. My card says "Rexford", but I started signing it as "Rexy". Later, a coworker started spelling it "Rexxie" because it was more feminine so I adopted that.

Often, they don't even look at the debit cards, and the credit cards they usually check only for the CV number. On the rare occasions when I am asked for a driver's license, I show them the one I got with the picture of me in my longer hair and make-up. The photographer even zoomed in so that the face would be even more feminine.

I'm waiting for the court date for the legal name change and have the gender marker change letters for when the name change is approved.

I'm changing it to "Deborah Rexford" so that I can maintain a link to my credit history and work history when necessary. The cards will just say Deborah and I'll just sign as Debbie.

Keep in mind that the store usually has cameras and surveillance so that if the card is reported stolen, they can see who was using it. After about 30 days, the old pictures are wiped to make room for the new ones.

Merchants are generally willing to give you the benefit of the doubt anyway. They will almost never point it out overtly because they don't want to lose a good paying customer.

[PretzelGirl]

Mark me as one that is pre-name change. I would say that 95% or more of my transactions are where my hands stay on the card all the time. So I am only asked for my ID on rare occasions and all but one of those wasn't a problem. The one was when the cashier locked up on me and was just staring at the ID. I had to tell her that yes, it was me.

But one thing I did was that my bank allows you to design a card on-line. So I made one with a flowery background and that is what stays in my purse. Image helps.

[sanderlay]

I've never had a problem using a credit card or debit card. They ask for my ID and my picture is a feminized male with long hair & earrings. Everyone is always professional and polite.