At peace

[Carlene]

Hello everyone,

I was wondering if you all were at peace with where you are? I know there are difficulties (limited acceptance, staring, rejection, islolation, etc.), but in spite of these issues, are you finding comfort? If you have lost a marriage, some family ties, and close friends, do you still get up in the morning and lounge in a nightshirt while feeling some inner joy?

Every step I have taken in my journey has felt right. Having said that, I have not yet had to pay the piper. I shave legs and chest, shape and tint eye browes, dress in women's jeans, shape nails, sit like a woman, and of course always underdress. All of these can be managed without much notice.

Life may have been much easier had these changes not felt right, but they do. The person (inner especially) is the person I was meant to be. But still, here I am frozen like a deer in headlights, paralized, and afraid to move forward.....

Carlene.....sigh:daydreaming:

[arbon]

I feel a lot better about myself as a person, for who I am. It does not all feel like a great big lie anymore, there are no secrets to be afraid of people finding out. I don't feel like I am trapped in a corner with no way out - I used to feel like that a lot.

So peace? A lot more at peace with myself then I was before. I still have plenty of issues though, lots! Still gotta live life and all that comes with it.

[DeeDee1974]

I would say since I started my transition 4 years ago, it has been the first time in my life that I have been consistently happy. Anxiety and depression are gone. There are still struggles, but I have finally found who I am.

I did lose my wife as a spouse, but in return she has become my closest friend and role model.

Anyone I lost in my life was probably more of an acquaintance.

[Rianna Humble]

That is one thing that I have experienced almost from the very outset of my transition. Yes, there have been disappointments on the way but I am at peace with myself.

Being at peace with myself does not mean that I am entirely satisfied with the progress I have made, my voice is not as good as it should be and my weight is too high, but with all that, I am accepted as a woman by those who count for me.

[Rachel Smith]

I lost my wife and unlike DeeDee we don't even speak anymore. That was tough after a 28 year marriage but the fact is I still feel better about myself. No more GD, no more ADD, no serious depression, it's just sadness now at times like everyone experiences. At least that's what the normal people tell me, lol. No more wishing and waiting now it's just living life and what a wonderful life it is.

[noeleena]

Hi,

I was / is at peace with myself from age 10, and payed the piper long ago and still paying and will. i expected too and knew i would,

it was not about clothes or any detail about being like a female or even..... wonting..... to,
yet knowing your body is different your emotions and how your wired, at the time i had no words i could explain myself, and who could i have asked any way,

if i had it would have been a quick trip to the nut house, end of story, and my life, so you say nothing, 1947 on .

matters not now of cause, At peace bring's with it a life happyness a life being fullfilled haveing some really lovely neat friends even though Jos is remarred we are still good friends with each other and history, together ,
we both worked out every thing so there is peace there as well she is happy with a lovely chap i get on well with and from my point Jos is with a real man, so thats good .

other wise im happy content and more than just at peace with myself, if i were to die tomorow i would die happy .

...noeleena...

[Leah Lynn]

Not really at peace, but there is a truce. I still have a long way to go to reach my ultimate goal, should I live long enough. Winning the lottery would help.

Leah

[Carlene]

Thanks to all who have responded. Accepting and moving forward with who we are seems to be a difficult path for many of us, but I think we all know that it was unnatural living as we did before......

thanks again....Carlene :hugs: