Being a closet case, and getting clothes

[Miriannah]

Where do you get your...you know, ouftits? For me in the past, it's rummaging through the bags of clothing my mother & sister get rid of, but obviously that means I'm not getting anything really all that sexy except in rare cases. I've even gotten a few pairs of shoes that way, thanks to my sister & I having a very similar shoe size. :D

When I was still a little kid, I'd just steal things out of my mother's (and sister's) dressers/closets. Of course, then they'd start wondering where these things went to...

How about everyone else?

[baretree45]

No Body Knows And Most Reley Dont Care If Your Buying Panties From A Store For Yourself Or Sombody Else. Most Women Even Like The Thought. If That Dont Work For You On Line Is Good. I Hope This Will Help. Please Repley.

[DonnaT]

Where do you get your...you know, ouftits? For me in the past, it's rummaging through the bags of clothing my mother & sister get rid of
I did that too. My mother's things she was getting rid of, no sister. I hid them in my room, but she found them one day. She never mentioned them though.

Now, I just buy them, or my wife does.

[Nikki Dee]

I think we probably all started that way Hun.!...now I buy where I like...nobody takes much notice these days..they just want your money...and online is easy...even if you have it delivered to another address or collection point.
love nikki. x

[Fallen Angel]

Thrift stores are really good. e-bay if you know you size than it should be a snap !! thats how i stated but any more its regular clothing stores xxx

[Maddie Nolan]

As everyone above says, nobody bats an eyelid when a guy buys female gear these days, but, if you are not comfortable with that, there are a myriad of online shops to choose from these days and most are cheaper than the High Street/Mall.
I have just set up a second eBay account to buy femme gear with and am having a ball at the moment! My bank account is beginning to look a bit dire though!

[Jillian310]

I buy almost all my stuf at stores. Thigh highs, bras, and panties are a snap at Target, K-Mart, etc. Those are basically the core items, and you just check out. The dresses, skirts, etc., you just take in the male fitting room and try them on. For other dresses, skirts, tops, etc., I shop the Bug, Catherine's, Lane Bryant, and a couple plus size boutiques. I have become very friendly with the clerks at those stores, so there is no problem getting a fitting room. They know me and expect I will try things on, so they always usher me into a nice fitting room. Every once in a while, like yesterday, I picked up a garter belt, didn't try it on, it was too large (hallelulah), and it was an easy exchange today. I find the clerks to be curteous and interested in me, and I make it clear that I am shoppng for me. Whenenver I go up to them, we exchange friendly greetings. I almost always shop en drab.

A problem I hav encountered is finding regular hose in my size for garter belt use. My thigh highs are too thick at the tops for the snaps, so when the friction strips wear a little, I just cut them off, and use the remaining part with the garters. Right below the friction strips on JC Penny stockings, there is about an inch of slightly thicker hem than the rest of the hose. That's where I attach the garters. But I really need some regular hose. Any suggestions will be appreciated. I simply cannot find regular stockings in any store!

[GypsyKaren]

I think thrift stores are the way to go, I do almost all of my shopping there. Large selection, though you do have to sort through a lot of 'mistakes', and you can't beat the prices.

I started out mostly with my step-sister's things, fortuneately she had good taste and we were the same size. Thank-you, Rochelle, thank-you so very much.

GypsyKaren

[Miriannah]

Wow, so many of you are gutsy. I don't think I could just go to a store and buy such things without turning bright red/sweating/stammering/etc. I'd do it online (many sites I've looked at have comprehensive size charts) if I could be sure I would be the one who recieved the package, and not someone else I live with by mistake. :)

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

Wow, so many of you are gutsy. I don't think I could just go to a store and buy such things without turning bright red/sweating/stammering/etc.

While we're horribly self-conscious and fear the world is watching our every move, the truth is that frankly 1) most people aren't paying attention and 2) they don't really care what you buy. As others have said, men buy presents for women all the time -- if asked you can always say it's a for "a special lady" (which will often gets you an "isn't that sweet" reaction from female sales staff). But it does help to ask for specific sizes instead of saying: "uh, she's about my size...." :D

[Sharon]

If you're nervous buying clothes, and we all are in the beginning, then I suggest you start off simply. Go to the supermarket or drug store and buy yourself some hose or stockings. It may still seem to be a huge step, but, really, men do it all the time. My wife used to have be pick her up pantyhose all the time when I would run to the grocery for her.

Also -- try going to a clothing store as if you are buying a gift for an SO. Men do it all the time. That's the scenario I placed in my mind when I first attempted to buy for myself. I soon realized that what the other girls have said is true -- salespeople just don't care, and, besides, they don't know you.

[Helen MC]

Nowadays with the Internet it is dead easy to purchase just about anything and not have to encounter a single human being and I use this a great deal now to buy panties and other female clothing. It is also true that many big supermarkets and stores are self service and if you buy some panties, a bra, tights, (pantyhose), etc with the rest of your shopping then the checkout girl is not the slightest bit interested in what she is scanning through from your basket, unlike older times when one had to go up to a counter and ask for the items one wished to purchase. Mail Order Catlogues still exist and these too, if somewhat slower, provide the same anonimity.

Ironically, when I was a teenager it was actually easier for me when I was at home in some respects. I may not have been able to dress at anytime I wished in skirts, dresses, blouses, bras, etc but had a treasury of knickers and panties at my fingertips so to speak as my Sister and my Mum had scores of panties and I simply had to take a pair and wear them for the day, returning them to the laundry basket then take another pair the following day. Of course when my Sister and my parents were out of the house, at least once a week, as my father went to the football (soccer) or out fishing on a Saturday or Sunday and my Mum and sister Anne would go out shopping on a Saturday or to play (field) Hockey on a Sunday morning so I often had the house to myself and could wear what I wished of their skirts, dresses, blouses at least for an hour or so and of course when they were away for longer I could have a few days, even a week of CD pleasure. I wore their panties secretly all the time.

When I moved to a place of my own in my late teens I then had freedom to dress in my home but apart from some panties I had taken with me I no longer had access to other female clothing to begin with. In those days, the early 1970s there was no Internet nor PCs and Mail Order Catalogues although available were a lot more difficult to obtain. They not only required a good credit rating as before Credit Cards became so widespread they allowed the user to pay up in installments, but they wanted the holder to run an Agency selling goods from the catalogue to other people , collecting the money and paying this over to them. It was not easy for a young single man to get such a catalogue in those days, I applied then but was refused.

I did venture up to the counter in some clothes shops to buy panties etc "for my sister" and didn't for the most part encounter any problems from shop assistants although they may well have guessed that these were for myself. My other methods were to go to what we in the UK call "Jumble Sales" where secondhand items are sold off in a hall etc usually for a Charity or Good Cause (a bit like the modern Car Boot or Garage Sale) . Often there would be skirts, tops, blouses, and of course panties in the old clothes section and very cheap too. Charity Shops (Thrift Shops as you call them in the USA) were also very good and in one I struck up a friendship with the middle aged lady who ran it and who correctly guessed that I wanted the clothes for myself. As I was a regular customer she would phone me if there were any items that she thought I would like and would fit me and I would call round , try them on there and buy them. She advised me on what was suitable for my build or not. Unfortunately this shop closed when the area was demolished and redeveloped and she retired and moved away. Lots of TVs and CDs make use of Charity Shops here in the UK from what I have read. There also used to be a weekly magazine called "Exchange and Mart" where people advertised items for sale and often clothing could be bought via this, a sort of non computerised e-bay, before that came into existence. I was able to buy a complete Bottle Green Schoolgirls Uniform comprising of a blazer, two knee length pleated skirts, a short games skirt and aertex blouse, some plale green cotton blouses, socks and of course some lovely Bottle Green cotton knickers via "Exchange and Mart".

Nowadays CDs have it made with the Internet, modern mail order catalogues which do not require any Agency to be run and can be had for the asking and shops are mostly self service . I wish we had had this convenience and anonimity when I was younger.

[Wendy me]

when you get over that can't go shopping in stores then it's a feedom that you can't beat ... just go out an do it it's the only way you get just what you realy want just go do it...........

[TGMarla]

It's mostly thrift stores for me.

[Cheree]

Well Mirriannah,
I have since found out after being here for a while these ladies here know what they are talking about! Once you get over your own "self apprehension" it's easy, EASY! because my case and point; thrift shop, women's section I found this beautiful black pleated dress I found, not sure about sizing yet but have a good eye for fitting in a mirror............walked over to a 3 way mirror, looked around , held it up to myself to check for fit, looked about perfect, women ALL over the place, looked around to see who was looking and guess what? NOT ONE PERSON EVEN BATTED AN EYE!!! So I stood there more at least a couple more minutes admiring it and ENJOYING the moment, walked to the cashier and bought it! It was absolutely awsome!
Long story short, give it a try, the only person apprehensive is yourself; get past that and your a shopper! Good Luck and may GOD Bless!

[AprilMae]

I buy in stores and online. I've never had a problem with shopping as a man.

[Lilith Moon]

I was a guy in a queue with an armful of assorted skirts, tops & lingerie a few days back. Some was for me some for my wife. She had disappeared to the loo so, as far as anybody in the store could see, I was a lone guy with an armful of girly clothes. Guess what? No problems at all. I exchanged a few pleasantries with the women next to me in the queue and when I got to the front I paid by VISA and that was that.

[wendy]

thrift stores first, as they have the best prices but selection is varied and sometimes it is hit and miss.

Next is lower end department stores. While they may not carry the high end stuff you can buy decent clothing at ok prices.

Just like what everyone else has said, your first time is nerve wracking, it was for me. But in this day and age, women buy men's clothes all the time, and vice versa. No one really bats an eye if you are browsing thru the women's section.

If you really want to 'avoid' as much people as possible, go early in the morning, right when the stores open, that way you get the whole dept. to yourself for 10-15 min.

[Tracy Lynn]

I started on E-bay but now I buy wherever I feel like.

[Lindahexi]

It's true that these days it's no big deal a guy buying womens clothes, but I remember when I first started shopping for girly stuff (panties at first) I used to be incredibly nervous. I made things worse for myself by walking past the counter time and again before taking the plunge to buy. One thing that always puzzled me though; my wife has always bought my male underwear, and most of my friends agree that their wives buy theirs, so how come that isn't frowned upon, yet a guy buying knickers or panties is still a bit voodoo?

These days I have no problems buying, I just select what I want and make the purchase, it seems natural to me now, and I have no embarrassment about it.

[Bridget]

I was in the same predicament. My mother and sister were not so great when it came to the world of women's fashion. So the best thing to do if you're in the closet is to go out and shop. If you're particularly paranoid, go to a department store and only buy a single item of women's clothing, measuring your size beforehand. Then request a gift receipt. This is a slow way to get clothes, but from start to finish, it looks like you're getting a present for your wife, mother or girlfriend.

Nowadays, i don't care. Today i was shopping a sale at Victoria's Secret, and despite being the only man there digging through the bargain bins with bras and panties, nobody noticed or stared. The same at Forever 21, Express or any other establishment you might think, omg, i'm going to be outed, in. Women, and you, once you get past the initial nervousness, are going to be too busy looking at what matches what and prices, to care who else is shopping around you. Even if they do notice, most women are too respectful to care or make a reaction right in front of you.

[Karren H]

Did the borrow the mothers and sisters things when growing up. And graduated to the wifes things when i got married. But after I lost 50 pounds playing ice hockey, I started to acquire my own wardrobe since I was now smaller than my wife. Add in hair and makeup and it was full steam ahead! I buy everything locally at department stores either in drab or enfemme.

love Karren

[johnny]

i usually buy my things at holiday times christmas,valentines etc. i feel more at ease then.it does get easier over time. i set my mind to it i picture myself doing it then i do it and it is true what the ladies here say... once you do buy the item you desire a whole new freedom is achieved.i have even gone to thrift stores for the basics like bras,panties,slips,lingerie in general and commented to the clerk that i was reselling the armful of item on the internet...i know that may seem bizarre...but that was the only way i felt comfortable at the time. it does help when going to an upscale shop to know your sizes ahead of time...love j oxoxox:o

[Miriannah]

If you're particularly paranoid, go to a department store and only buy a single item of women's clothing, measuring your size beforehand. Then request a gift receipt.
OMG, absolutely brilliant! I love how some of the best ways to do something are often the most simple and overlooked. Still, my biggest problem is the people I live with currently, since most of what I want, shoes in particular, are things I've only seen on the internet. I sure don't want the wrong person there to recieve a package like that instead of me. :D

[Claire B]

Hi, I have got to agree with most of the post concerning getting clothes. It is true that most sales people do not care who you are buying clothes for and what you are buying. All they can think of is the money that will be exchanged. As for myself I buy my own clothing. From lingerie to blouses, skirt or dresses. Once when I was buying makeup the young sales girl asked me if the makeup was for me? I looked her right in the eye and said yes. And do you think it is the right shades for my complexion? Now when I go back to this store and she is there. We just smile as if nothing was ever said.

Hugs, Claire

[shelbyjeans4u]

I as others have found,all they want is your money,,it's a stores policy to give you the best service possible,and more often thn not they are more help than you might imagine.Shelby

[Deanna2]

Target and Kmart are so easy, even when they are crowded. If you concerned about someone noticing, which never happens anyway except in your mind, go early just after the stores open and there are very few people about. The throw out bins and racks outside boutiques are also handy and those stores are just glad to get rid of old stock.

For pantyhose, lipstick, nail polish and other sundries the supermarkets are very good. Just throw them all in with your groceries.

[emmicd]

Shopping at the mall is relatively easy for me now as are stores like Target and Kohls.

I also order on line at JC Pennys and pick up the order at the catalogue order department.

I do have some trouble though shopping at Victorias Secret or Frederic's of Hollywood because it's not easy for a guy to buy lingerie.

I do shop for my wife too for gifts.

She likes my taste in clothes.

emmi

[cyle_elise]

if you are really concerned about receipt of packages you can go to like a mailboxes etc, (ups store now?) and get a "po box"

its not really a po box, its a real street address and you can send your CC statements and all your packages there. its a bit costly, too costly for my limited needs. none of my neigbors and i talk and all the places that ship are discreet (plain boxes) so i just send it to my home now.

and USPS has fairly cheap po boxes (way cheaper than mailboxes) but some places (a few) wont ship there.

:)

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

Actually FedEx and UPS aren't allowed to deliver to USPS mailboxes (because of USPS regulations). "Private mailboxes" are most expensive, but can receive deliveries from both carriers, as well as the USPS.

Incidentally, most online/catalog retailers ship in fairly discrete boxes, so it's unlikely to attract the attention of neighbors.

But honestly, it's a lot easier to shop in person. Ideally en femme, since you can try things on, but lots of men do buy presents for women so no one's going to get on the store PA and announce you're buying something. If it makes you feel more comfortable, ask for a gift receipt (from department stores, etc. that have them).

[Cathy J]

Shopping for female stuff is easy on either the web or in the department stores. My experience is most of the clerks have an attitude of total indiference, although I have had a few remark how nice I would look in an item I was buying. It takes courage, but I usually reply with a polite "Thank you" and it ends there.

I haven't yet gotten the courage to try using the dressing rooms yet, though.

Try it. You might like it.

Love and hugs, Cathy

[FrillyKnickers]

I have only recently started buying my own lingerie and have found it extremely difficult as I feel as if I have no privacy.

I actually don't mind going into a department store and buying, my biggest fear is being seen by one of my co-workers or friends.

But there is much better choice and quality online!

I am a closet wearer hiding from my parents so anything I buy online I always have to make sure it will be next day delivery, and I only order when I am off of work. Then the next day I am worried that I am going to miss the postman and one of my parents will accidently open my mail (this has happened many times before!).

I find it all very stressful and difficult!

[ErikaLeigh]

Well the first time I bought anything, was at payless.com. I ordered the shoes online and had them shipped to a local store near me (its free shipping that way). I was nervous when I went to pick them up, but after the first time......lets just say I must have 15 pairs of shoes and boots. The ladies that handed me my orders were very nice, and one even asked if I would like to try them on (too nervous to do that at the time). My next conquest is to go and get a pedicure.

Erika

[karen marie]

i was at sears the other day and i noticed three
guys in the women's department with me.i wonder
if they were buying for their SO's or themselves like me.
believe me nobody cares.i've tried shoes on at kmart and
payless,if you go early it's usually not very busy.
hugs karen.

[FrillyKnickers]

After the first time I bought something in a department store I came to the conclusion that no one was interested in the person buying the product, most of the time they just assume it's for your Girlfriend or Wife. I went into a store the other day and bought something, the next day I also went back and was served by the same saleswoman, she said "I take it she liked it then?" - I just said yes and that was that.

Like I say my worry with department stores is seeing someone I know while buying, this particular store is a 10 minute walk from my work, so the chances are quite high. Fingers crossed no one saw me, although I was wearing a hat at the time as a sort of disguise, so I will just deny it was me!

[Lisa Marie]

I have a P.O. Box it only costs me $25.00 every year to renew it. I order alot of stuff from the P.O. Box and lots of times I go shopping to. Not that nervous anymore as I used to be.

[bridgette63]

When I was young and at home I used to borrow Mom and my sisters things but as I got older and left the house I had to get my own stuff so I got it fromstores..usually KMart or Wal Mart or places like that, Then I found mail order for specialty items like padded panties or breast forms... I dont have the courage to go to a boutique and get personalized service though, thats still a ways off.

[Aileen]

I go on Ebay. Most stores are going to at least pretend that you're buying it for someone else. They might say. "Do you know her size?"

[Cathy Anderson]

Goodwill, Thrift Stores--Halloween and Mardis Gras are reasonably good times, as they offer an implicit excuse.

As I got older, I realized it isn't all that unusual for a guy to buy stuff for a wife or gf. So I just acted like that's what it was for. For example, I'd make a point of asking for a "gift receipt" in case "she" has to exchange it.
I'd also ask for the article to be placed in a box suitable for wrapping.

Further, I'd try to look as respectable as possible, as a male that is, when buying something.

Cathy

[Amanduhrob]

Marshalls and TJ Maxx are also good stores to "get lost" in, they're like thrift stores with new clothes, have some great bargans, and absolutely no one pays any attention to you while you shop there.

[lynie]

Ladies, One should NEVER feel bad about buying make up. All you should be concerned with is how wonderful you will look, and how beautiful you will feel!
!

Lynie

[JoAnnDallas]

Sometime ago, I went into Victoria Secrets and was browsing their satan PJ's. A sales person came up and asked if she could help and what size my wife was. I answered that I was a Large. She did not even break stride. She said "Ok, we have some lovely ones that should fit you" and proceeded to help me pick out a set. even held them against me to make sure the pants were not too short or long. She then rang it up and said "Have a nice day". What she thought or said after I left doesn't matter. Got a nice pair of PINK PJ's.

[AprilMae]

OMG, absolutely brilliant! I love how some of the best ways to do something are often the most simple and overlooked. Still, my biggest problem is the people I live with currently, since most of what I want, shoes in particular, are things I've only seen on the internet. I sure don't want the wrong person there to recieve a package like that instead of me. :D


Get a Post Office Box. The UPS Store is a good place for that, they even give you a regular street address for places that won't deliver to a PO Box. But try it in person. It's a lot of fun once you get over it the first time. i went into KMart the other day, not looking to buy any girls stuff, but there was a great sale and..........

[connie rotten]

Go to a TJ Max type store about 1/2 hour before they close. Pick somthing out and buy it. The store will only have a few if any other shoppers . Start going regularly and always buy somthing. As soon as the clerks see you as a sale they will always be helpfull. They might even want to dress you like their own living doll.:ld:

[Staci]

Thrift stores are great. I got a bridal petticoat for about $10. I also shop at the major department stores. Some people know you are shopping for you and others don't. But it seems all they want is the sale.