How many?

[susancheerleader]

I don't know if this poll has been taken recently or if at all. If so, I am sorry!
Some contacts have made me wonder about how many guys here that dress, are gay or bi or straight.
So I'd like to post this poll. As you all know, it is private.
Please be honest! :)

[AprilMae]

I'm currently straight, although I do admit to being curious about alternative experiences from time to time.

[eleventhdr]

Very mainly straight male but lesbian female!.

[Imogen_Mann]

Straight here, I tried the other option, it was fun, but It was only about sex, not love, and I just dont fancy men.

I have a few gay fantasies, but thats where it stays.

XX

Jayme

[Sharon]

You may find another poll, similarly conducted, and just a couple days since its last entry, that may be of interest:

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=20678

[Miriannah]

Relationshipwise I'm only interested in women, although I've always been interested in being 'the woman' with another man. I guess this would make me bi...or just bi-curious. ;)

[paulaN]

I voted bi but it is more like bi curious. I have never been with another male or crossdresser. But I sure would like to try it. I never sex I didn't like.

[susancheerleader]

You may find another poll, similarly conducted, and just a couple days since its last entry, that may be of interest:

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=20678


Ooops. My Bad----
Sorry! :doh:

[Clare]

I voted straight coz that's what I am!

Also, see my response in the other thread listed by Sharon.

[ericalynne]

as a man i feel i am str8. But as a woman i am definitely str8 (bi), if thatmeans a womanis supposed toi be attracted to a man...i definitely have my feminine fantasies if you know what i mean.

[LindaTS]

I enjoy being with other T-girls and females alike so I suppose that makes me Bi. But for some reason I don't want to be with men and I do speak from experience there.

[Amanduhrob]

I am straight, and have no desires, or fantasy's of sex with a man, that said, my Domme does use a strap on on me, and I love it.

She says she is planning on using it on me while I'm dressed, but hasn't as of yet, nor have I ever had sex with someone while I was dressed.

[Karren H]

Straight!!! Love women, just love to dress like them also.

Love Karren

[Sedona]

Straight as an arrow when all-male,

Just think like a lesbian sometimes.

-S

[ReginaK]

In brutal honesty, bi. I love women and transgendered people.

Regular guys do nothing for me.

[Sweet Susan]

I don't know if this poll has been taken recently or if at all. If so, I am sorry!
Some contacts have made me wonder about how many guys here that dress, are gay or bi or straight.
So I'd like to post this poll. As you all know, it is private.
Please be honest! :)


Oh, this poll gets taken about once a month.......

[Julia Cross]

Totally straight and committed to my girlfriend. Crossdressing for me is an expression of my desire for more beautiful, colourful, interesting and creative ways of expressing who I am. Yes, like many, it was accompanied by sexual feelings at a young age but I believe the reason I explored it in the first place was because I was curious about the look and feel of the clothes of the opposite gender which I was not supposed to wear.

At my core, I am still a heterosexual man devoted to my very loving girlfriend and partner. I thank my lucky stars that she accepts Julia.

Julia

[Reana]

I've had limited, but pleasurable, Bi experiences with other TGs over the past three years, expect to have more. Fantasize about males when dressed and at a high level of sexual arousal but not sure whether that line will ever be crossed. There will, however, never be any form of physical interaction with TGs or males unless I'm totally dressed and 100% in my femme mode. Been strongly hetero all my life (until these last three years) but fantasized about experiencing sex from the woman's side (for 20 years prior to my first experience) when with gg partners and even expressed that fantasy to some.

[MelissaM]

I have to admit, these threads scare the hell out of me. I am the girlfriend of a proclaimed straight CD. But then I come here and see that there are those that are "100% hetero but when dressed I'd like to give a man oral." And on and on.

I know I have to have faith in my partner, his honesty. And I do. It's hard. And threads like this make it harder. It raised more questions. More doubt. Because putting on clothing does not create a new set of permissions. "Oh I'm straight, unless I am wearing a dress" doesn't count for 'I am straight.' It means you are bi. Or gay. Not straight. The dress doesn't give you a 'pass' for a minute.

So is my CD being honest with me when he says he is straight, that I am all he wants? Gosh I hope so. I only write this post to tell you all that there are GG's like me that see these threads and their hearts sink. "I could never tell my wife but I've had these fantasies." I sure hope that's not April. Because if it is, I cannot date him/her. There are way too many STD's in the world for me to risk it. And besides, it's cheating. And that is wrong. And it's lying. Which is also wrong.

Straight when dressed? Straight when not dressed? These are the questions that keep me up at night. Not whether or not he's a crossdresser or not.

[Julia Cross]

Hi Melissa,

Please don't be too worried. I agree with your concerns and as a crossdresser, amd concerned as well. Crossdressing is about dressing in the opposite genders clothing and not about becoming the opposite gender and having an ilicit affair. Keep in mind, there are so many degrees of crossdressing as well as there are levels of loyalty towards one's partners. The two really aren't connected in my opinion. If a person's sex drive is such that they are willing to cheat, then they would likely do that dressed in the opposite gender or not, given the opportunity.

If you know your partner and trust him, then please don't let these posts worry you about your relationship. Feel saddened for the partners who are being cheated on, or at least at risk.

This view is not likely to gain m any point as well but I feel there is a percentage of the population outthere that needs to wake up and take resposibility for their actions and appreciate the damage they may/will cause.

Julia

[renee k]

Im straight! and agree with Karren,love women and love to dress like them. Not even bi curious!

Huggs, Renee

[MelissaM]

This view is not likely to gain m any point as well but I feel there is a percentage of the population outthere that needs to wake up and take resposibility for their actions and appreciate the damage they may/will cause.

Julia

You are absolutely right, Julia. If people took responsibility for their actions, the world would be a better place.

And I understand your point, as far as trusting my partner. Its just that I am trying to get my head wrapped around the 'why' he crossdresses. And I can't help but think that it's because he wants to attract guys. I wear a short skirt to impress men, not to be more comfortable. Comfort is a long flowing dress, it's like wearing nothing at all. But it isn't necessarily sexy.

I am slowly learning more and more about crossdressing. The why will always allude me. I accept him / her and what she wants to wear. I think it would be fun to shop as girlfriends. We've gone to a cd friendly bar (her dressed) and had a great time. But I have to tell you, I'm human. And the more I read, "I am straight unless I am dressed" the harder and harder it is to accept that it's just a 'fun to be something different.' It's difficult for me to explain. I just know this. I don't want to lose my man to another man. Or think that I am somehow not good enough for him because I don't have a penis, although I do wear skirts and heels.

[carend_99]

I would say I'm straight, but a tiny bit bi-curious. I'm definitely not into men, whether I'm in drab or dressed, but if the right t-girl was interested, I may do something. But it would have to be someone I 100% trusted! Just being honest.

[Stormgirl]

Straight,the whole bi sexual thing didnt fly with me.

[ReginaK]

For the GGs who are are concerned, I don't think you should worry too much. Even under temptation, a good partner would remain monogamous, dressed or not.

The type of people who do cheat on their spouses would do it whether they crossdressed or not.

[HaleyPink2000]

Way to in love with my GG wife of 25 years. Hetro BTW.

Haley:)

[JocelynG]

Very much in love with women,especially my wife. I wouldn't mind a guy taking me out though;) But I consider myself straight

[andreaboots]

Hey, it's quirky enough dressing in the opposite sex's clothing let alone even contemplating something akin to elicit sex with a male. I'm definitely straight and love to dress and play many roles as a, "woman". I think I could understand where a lot of CD'ers tend to think, "fem" and want to experience what women do when with men. When dressed and feeling fem and sexy I think one automatically feels more attracted to men not that any CD'er will actually go all the way. Sex is a very curious thing as well as a mysterious shadow, it has it's own power over us. It's always with us and it takes on many forms. By dressing it tends to take on a whole new aspect. This is just my opinion based on my own feelings and from what I've read here in the forums and I hope I make sense. Discussion is healthy so don't hold back, vent and you will feel better! Love all! XXX;)

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

And I can't help but think that it's because he wants to attract guys. I wear a short skirt to impress men, not to be more comfortable. Comfort is a long flowing dress, it's like wearing nothing at all. But it isn't necessarily sexy.

Melissa, I can understand your worries. I don't know if you saw this thread (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?p=279236) about "feeling pretty" but Helana raised some important points that may reassure you.

One of the most important is that the other reason for wanting to feel pretty -- to feel good about oneself. For me, and probably a lot of other CDs, that's one important reason why we dress. And to be honest, a lot of us do look "prettier" en femme -- a number of examples here (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=6801). (Whether we're more attractive, I'll leave to others... I'm attracted to women, so there's an inherent bias.) After all, make-up inherently is designed to play up your features, women's clothing is often designed to enhance the figure in a way that men's clothing often isn't, etc.

Of course women's clothing can be uncomfortable. But the pyschic benefits can outweigh the physical discomfort. CDs aren't alone in this -- lots of GGs put up with "cruel shoes." I guess an analogy might be if you've ever gotten glammed up for a special night out and feel pretty and witty and bright. For us it's often a similar feeling, even if we're wearing "average" clothes, since most of us don't get to dress as often as we'd like, so every time we do is a special occasion.


But I have to tell you, I'm human. And the more I read, "I am straight unless I am dressed" the harder and harder it is to accept that it's just a 'fun to be something different.' It's difficult for me to explain. I just know this. I don't want to lose my man to another man. Or think that I am somehow not good enough for him because I don't have a penis, although I do wear skirts and heels.

Of course, it's unsettling to think your partner might be unfaithful, or that you're somehow "not woman enough."

For the latter concern, just remember that it's got nothing to do with you -- if he's like the vast majority of us, he started in childhood and will continue CDing whether or not he's with you.

As far as CD sexuality, it is more complicated than Tri-Ess lets on. Sexuality and gender are both spectrums that society chooses to see as either/or. For some, CDing does seem to be a way to legitimize bisexual urges they can't acknowledge otherwise. Some folks are just ****ty, but I suspect they'd be that way even if they couldn't dress. For some dressing does seem to trigger fantasies about what it would be like to be the one pursue instead of the one doing the pursuing. (It may be less about actual sex than the seduction.) For some, it's questions about what would be like to "be the woman" (although at Marla GG points, some of these folks are more "penetration curious" than actually interested in having sex with a man). And I suspect a number of people -- not just CDs -- have thought at least once about what it would be like to be the opposite partner in bed.

It's also important to remember the distinction between fantasies that people are intrigued by but have not desire to act on, vs. desires that they would like to carry out, and actual behavior. My sense is a lot of what you're hearing in these sort of threads are fantasies being expressed than anything else.

But as others have said, the real issue is whether someone is monogamous, regardless of what they're wearing or who they're attracted do.

[Amanduhrob]

You are absolutely right, Julia. If people took responsibility for their actions, the world would be a better place.

And I understand your point, as far as trusting my partner. Its just that I am trying to get my head wrapped around the 'why' he crossdresses. And I can't help but think that it's because he wants to attract guys. I wear a short skirt to impress men, not to be more comfortable. Comfort is a long flowing dress, it's like wearing nothing at all. But it isn't necessarily sexy.

I am slowly learning more and more about crossdressing. The why will always allude me. I accept him / her and what she wants to wear. I think it would be fun to shop as girlfriends. We've gone to a cd friendly bar (her dressed) and had a great time. But I have to tell you, I'm human. And the more I read, "I am straight unless I am dressed" the harder and harder it is to accept that it's just a 'fun to be something different.' It's difficult for me to explain. I just know this. I don't want to lose my man to another man. Or think that I am somehow not good enough for him because I don't have a penis, although I do wear skirts and heels.

Melissa,

You wear a mini to attract guys and look sexy, we wear them to feel sexy, or at least I do, it's a different mindset.

Just like everyone else, there's straight CD's, gay CD's, and bi CD's.

When I dress, I've never had thoughts, dreams, or fantasys of men, even men in drag, and if your husband says the same, why not give him the benefit of doubt? Just because we're wired to enjoy feminine garments, looks, and accessories, doesn't mean we also want a penis, other than our own:angel:

You want to know the why, and I for one can't tell you why, but I can tell you that if I don't dress, I get tempermental, moody, and depressed.

I'm sure I'm not the only CD here that wishes that they didn't dress. I'm sure you can imagine the stigma that goes along with a dude in a dress.

Have faith in Hubby, and try to keep an open mind, and keep reading.

[Falcor]

Had a quick gander at the poll results of this and the previous poll,the polls show a far greater presence of bisexuality[real or fantasy]amongst cders,than in the poulation in general.
Lets be painfully honest here,what does that suggest?
I'm certainly not trying to cause any concern to anyone,I suspect ,we in our community are overwhelmingly loyal to our partners,but the poll,at the very least is food for thought.
A profoundly thinking ..fal.

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

the polls show a far greater presence of bisexuality[real or fantasy]amongst cders,than in the poulation in general.
Lets be painfully honest here,what does that suggest?

Probably mostly that we're more open about our sexual orientation than the general public. The 1999 Yvonne's Place survey (http://www.yvonnesplace.net/survey/survey99/sexuality.htm) of around 1,200 CDs found the following breakdown in self-reported sexual orientation:

Heterosexual 48.4%
Heterosexual but bi-curious 23.9%
Bisexual but prefer women 10.1%
Heterosexual with homosexual experiences 7.2%
Bisexual 6.6%
Bisexual but prefer men 1.6%
Homosexual 1.5%
Homosexual with heterosexual experiences 0.7%

which isn't that surprising when compared to things like the Kinsey studies. Sexual orientation -- like gender -- is a spectrum that our society chooses to see as an either/or.

[Julia Cross]

Had a quick gander at the poll results of this and the previous poll,the polls show a far greater presence of bisexuality[real or fantasy]amongst cders,than in the poulation in general.
Lets be painfully honest here,what does that suggest?
I'm certainly not trying to cause any concern to anyone,I suspect ,we in our community are overwhelmingly loyal to our partners,but the poll,at the very least is food for thought.
A profoundly thinking ..fal.

I think the reason the polls here show more bisexuality might be that many straight and reserved CD's remain in the closet. They eithr don't feel comfortable being on a forum or don't have any desire. i wonder if there is a higher percentage here because the CD's with extra preferences are also looking and being a little exhibitionist.

I personally believe the numbers are the same as they would be amongs the non-cd popualtion, or just a little higher, but not nearly as high as the polls indicate.

julia