opinions count!

[lisa marseau]

I have always had problems with sex. Guilt and Shame are the two biggest reasons I have always avoided sex. Yes, I avoid sex and in a big way. I am not a virgin. I have two children out of wedlock. I remember when I lost my virginity. I was 20 and totally shut down for two weeks. I could not even look at myself in the mirror.
Here is the thing. I absolutely LOVE women. Obsessed actually. So much so that I have always wanted to be one. So what is the deal?

[UNDERDRESSER]

Seriously? How are we to know? Something in your past, either the way you were brought up, some heavy religious influence perhaps? Some suppressed incident? Way too many options. Have you tried talking to a therapist?

[Beverley Sims]

I can only say it is something in your upbringing that has triggered this problem.

Maybe therapy would help as sex is not dirty, nor are sexual thoughts and fantasies.

You should be able to dream about it, and in a pleasant way.

[kimdl93]

Don't know about your background but someone apparently taught you a horribly dysfunctional view of human sexuality. It's not your fault, but the fault of those family or institutional influencers who equated sexuality with shame. Nothing could be more natural or genuine than the sensual and loving interaction between two people...and yet some institutions viewed sex as corrupt.

[docrobbysherry]

Lisa, sex is a normal function for adults. Is should be as natural as breathing, eating, and sleeping for u.

The fact that it isn't could be very destructive for u. Sounds like it may have been already?

I agree with Underdresser. U should find a qualified, experienced therapist that u trust and talk your issues over with him/her ASAP!

[ReineD]

This may or may not apply to you, but some people are asexual. As with anything else, there is a very wide range in asexual feelings.

There's a wonderful website for information:

http://www.asexuality.org/home/
http://www.asexuality.org/home/general.html


Forums: http://www.asexuality.org/en/