"Enjoy Being A Male" - So "What", Specifically?

[Melissa_59]

I've seen a lot of responses to various questions that include the phrase "I enjoy being a male too much to want to be female" (and similar responses). So my question is: What do you do as a male that you don't think you could do as a female?

If this was Victorian England (or other places around the world right now that I won't mention because that will get this question deleted), sure - I could see a lot of limitations. But speaking as someone from the "modern western society", I can't think of anything off the top of my head that a male can do that a female cannot do - things that YOU do that you could not do as a female. Can someone give me examples, because honestly... I'm baffled here.

Maybe I'm being blind. Not asking for flames, but open my eyes please? :)


Thank you,

Mel

[Nikki A.]

Melissa, it's not what you can't do as a woman (other than stand in the toilet). But I'm not sure that I'd want to lose my male side to be a woman full time.

[Rachael Leigh]

There is nothing I could not do as male that a women cant do, and since for me its not about being a women its just about the fashion.
In male mode our society doesnt like change in such things as dress and clothing styles, unless its female, guys stuff has pretty much stayed the same for many years but womens styles seem to change every year. So maybe thats why I like dressing not sure.

[Karren H]

Ok.... I don't want to have to dress up and look good every minute of every day.. I don't want to make 75% of what make right now...... I can keep this up all day.... lol

[Tina_gm]

For me, it is not any one thing I can or cannot do. Perhaps though, it is how I can do certain things, that they are easier, more convenient.... Mostly it is not even that. For me, A lot of it is a certain feeling, just as we cannot truly explain the feeling of dressing or doing other feminine things, shaving, or just being feminine in some way. There is a certain male pride I still have, being able to do things physically that most women and some other guys cannot? I am very competitive, and not that women are not or even shouldn't be, but the competitiveness wears better with men than it does with women. The same as being assertive. I have nothing against women being strong, competitive, assertive, but it is more of a guy thing, and it is received better from men than from women in general.

Another thing, and being as discreet as possible, I like intimacy as a guy. When it comes to intimacy, I really drop any gender variance off there. Why, I do not know. I just do. CDing and my general issues of femininity are not sexual in nature. Sensual, but not sexual. I very much enjoy soft smooth sensual feelings of dressing, yet also enjoy the sensations of being strong and rugged, (although my body seems to reject that aspect of masculinity for the most part) yet I do enjoy feeling it as I can.

[Beverley Sims]

I couldn't stand on the beach and impress the girls like Charles Atlas dressed as a woman....

Come to think of it I can't stand on the beach as a man and impress the girls like Charles Atlas.

If you don't know who Charles Atlas is? Never mind.......

You may be too young.

I like a rest from being a girl sometimes, the same as I like being a man.


I also told a lie......

When I was twenty I did impress the girls on the beach with my looks and some of the guys too. :)

[Samantha Clark]

For me, it's that I'm deeply in love with my wife and totally committed to her. She isn't a lesbian and we both like the stuff in the bedroom (as well as our life outside the bedroom) too much to change anything!

[mechamoose]

Excellent question!

For me it is a visceral thing. I recognize that there are some aggressive/predatory feelings which come from my male side, which are distinctly different from the nurturing feelings I get from my female side. It isn't about capabilities, it is about how it *feels*.

You DO feel different 'en femme', yes? Then to me it seems natural to feel different 'en male'.

- MM

[Linda E. Woodworth]

I think you're missing the point of the statement "I enjoy being a male".

Just as some people know instinctively that they are a woman trapped in a man's body. I know instinctively that I am a man. I love the trappings of femininity, especially the clothes, but do not wish to be female physically.

I have thought about this before and while I "think" I could do it if I had too I know would regret it and miss my male self.

B

[mechamoose]

If you are responding to me specifically, then you need to go look at my profile & posts. I'm a dual natured person in a bull male body. I have a pretty good idea of what parts of me come from where.

I dress in girl clothes because it makes me feel more comfortable. Guy clothes make me feel awkward & plain. Girl clothes have color and style. I *like* being pretty... but I still recognize that I have certain urges which are purely male (outside of sex) involving aggressiveness, competition, provision, and responsibility. I'm not saying that female people don't have these traits, I'm saying that there is a statistically significant group of people who have these traits who are what is considered (traditionally) male.

- MM

[reb.femme]

.....I don't want to make 75% of what make right now...... I can keep this up all day.... lol

As the lady said, and it happens right here in Elizabethan UK, women earn less than men on the whole. My other half is earning a fair amount more than me though, but she only does it to make me feel more inferior than I already do :heehee:.

Seriously though, unless I was tending toward TS, I can't see why I would want to be a female all the time. I'm genetically male, with many male traits.

Rebecca

[Seana Summer]

For me, as a large intimidating looking male, I can walk through a parking garage, as well as other places, late at night with little fear. My S.O. says my appearance (male) scares people:lol::rofl::) I rather enjoy that part of being male and shaped like a male. If I were of average female shape and size I would have to be as cautious as my S.O. is........ even in this modern, supposedly civilized, Western Society. Just one benefit of being male that I enjoy and do not take for granted

[Zylia]

I wouldn't say I enjoy being a man, I just don't mind being perceived as one. My actual gender identity isn't particularly relevant.

[hope springs]

For me, it's that I'm deeply in love with my wife and totally committed to her. She isn't a lesbian and we both like the stuff in the bedroom (as well as our life outside the bedroom) too much to change anything!

Ditto foe me. For now the thing i like most about my masculine side is my wife. I love her more than my next breath. I didnt come out until later in our marriage. It would be cruel and unfair for me to deny her that man. Aside from that, im glad i dont get a period. Thats gotta be rough girls. I like that i dont have to deal with sexism. Also, the routine of keeping up your looks can be tedious. I think it would get really old if i had to do it day in and day out. As a guy, its accepted if you do the bare minimum for your appearance.

[Nadine Spirit]

There are a few bedroom acts that I would not be able to perform if I was fully a woman. But that would seem to be obvious.

Other than that there is nothing that I could not do as a woman that I do as a man. But that is not what I mean when I say that I like being a man. There are just some times that I prefer to be dressed as a man and there are times I prefer to be dressed as a woman. Most of the time I prefer to be dressed in some sort of gender non conforming manner. It has nothing to do with what I can or cannot do, it is a matter of what I like to do.

[Kate Simmons]

It's really one of those deals that boils down to feelings. If you don't have the feelings for it, you wouldn't know. The fact is that males are actually genetically modified females which are influenced by the "Y" chromosome in the early stages of pregnancy as all fetuses start out essentially as females. Through socialization we "learn" by feed forward and feedback feelings as to the societal expectations of our physical sex although all individuals don't follow a pure gendered model so there are natural variations on a theme.

How we adapt to this is how we will relate to the world for the most part.No rule is written in stone and there are exceptions to all of them.Everyone is different. In my own case I always thought everyone had the same feelings as myself regardless of what they were physically. When I got out and about in the world I found out differently. I thought being a guy was a "given" and that my desire to present as a woman was shown to be abnormal by society even though I enjoyed doing i. I'm sure some women feel the same in a reverse way. Enjoying being a guy or a girl is simply a matter of preference the way I see it and there are good and bad with the both of them.

The key for myself was getting in touch with all of my feelings, accepting them and no longer being afraid or ashamed of them. Now I enjoy being a guy or girl and it's always my choice to do so.This is called being a full spectrum person and I wouldn't have it any other way. :)

[Sarah Doepner]

After so many years of being male to all but a few select people, I enjoy the male role I've played in their lives. This isn't a role that's been forced on me, but one that evolved naturally. It's not about camping, doing yard work or sharing beers while watching sports. I've been Son, Brother, Dad, Grandpa, Uncle and buddy to a lot of wonderful people and to break that image they have of me would be difficult. I would know I'm the same person and many of them could make the adjustment, but some of the people I care about the most would find it difficult. That would make those relationships about something else and I don't have the energy or desire to try and change something that has worked so well for so long.

I've thought a lot about what parts of my life would improve if I began to share more of my female side with others. It would make some things more complicated for a while, but it's not something I need to do to stay happy. The kind of life I have now works fairly well for me and with a little effort and opening up to a couple of close family in the future should be enough, for me.

[NicoleScott]

I think you are mistakenly equating "being a male" with "doing things a male does".

[bridget thronton]

Father is really the only male role I would miss

[AllieSF]

As for a female being able to do male things and vice versa up to a point does not necessarily clear up what your first quote says, "I enjoy being a male too much to want to be female".

I don't want to be a woman. At least at this moment in time. Therefore, what I do as a male is more natural to me and enjoy that part of me. The things that I do in male mode, I can also do in female mode, eat, drink, party, play golf and read books. However, I really do enjoy doing them as a male even though I also enjoy those same activities in female mode, and I do them more often as a male. Our male life daily activities are to me much simpler and require less work to accomplish than those similar ones that females do. I put on the same shorts from yesterday with the same short sleeve golf shirt and go out to have coffee. The women I normally met up with to share our morning coffee social time always seem to change their outfit and sometimes even accessories to match every day. I brush my teeth, take a shower comb my once shorter hair once, get dressed and walk out the door. They do some of those same things but with their longer hair and maybe a touch of makeup and those quick decisions as to what to wear today need more time to "get presentable" before walking out their doors.

I am part time and that is good enough for me. Just because I crossdress as a woman does not mean that I want to do that every day. There is a big difference between want and need. I want to dress up and have a need to do it frequently enough to satisfy that need. I do not "need" to dress every day, nor do I "want" to do that every day, even though being retired and living alone I probably could.

Now my question to you is, do you dress every day, or at least want to dress all day every day? Do you go out every day dressed into the real world, preparing and making yourself up every day as needed? If yes, then maybe you are more than just a CD and are further down the TG spectrum. I guess I am more baffled as to why you would think that most of us CD's would want to dress up every single day as a woman. Yes, many would like to do that, most would probably just want to dress more since they are limited in their own particular opportunities and life logistics to be able to do that. However, to think that all CD's want to do that is a little over the top for me, and I dress completely every time I do dress as a woman, and I go out about 99 percent of the time when not counting getting dressed at home to pick out an outfit for my next time out. I.e. I hardly ever dress up juts to stay at home. I get enough personal time dressed out in the real world to keep me very satisfied for now.

[Melissa_59]

Ok.... I don't want to have to dress up and look good every minute of every day..

Not all women put that much time into how they look. I can cite examples all day.

~Mel

[Melissa_59]

If you don't know who Charles Atlas is? Never mind.......

I had the Joe Weider Workout program when I was a teenager - from my father urging me to "bulk up". I'm familiar with Charles Atlas, and Louis Cyr even though both were quite a bit before my time. I'll be 0x37 this summer.

~Mel

[Melissa_59]

If you are responding to me specifically...

No, I wasn't. I see it from a lot of people and I just asked out of curiosity, because I'm that sort of person.

I wasn't singling anyone out.

~Mel

[Melissa_59]

I think you are mistakenly equating "being a male" with "doing things a male does".

I don't think I'm mistaking anything. When someone says "I enjoy being a male too much", that doesn't necessarily imply anything other than a pretty broad statement - precisely the reason I asked for clarification. Perhaps there are those who think that "males are better at" whatever and that's why they enjoy being male - but the only way I'm going to know is to ask the question.

So I did. I'm just curious, nothing more. :)

~Mel

[Shara]

Nothing I do a GG could not do. My hobbies used to be men only but no more. I also ride a Harley. When I started riding you never saw a women driving one, but now it's common. At work, I make more than a women in the same position in a different location. And she does as good if not a better job than I do.

[Wildaboutheels]

Well, I've never attempted to "present", "look" or "act" as a female. [Except for Haloween and presenting as a "special" type of female]

But I felt compelled to throw in my dimes worth here. Why on earth would any "sane" man want to give up rational, logical thought processes for having one's feelings and emotions interfere in making "good decisions"?

I am not knocking what Mother Nature has seen fit to do mind you in balancing power between the sexes. She obviously knows what she is doing... or none of us would be here at this site.

[Adriana Moretti]

i like being a male too...wait I AM one....but seriously...here is something I can do as a male but not as a female. GROW A BEARD. Last week was a busy week for me so I had no time to dress, and diddnt feel like shaving..after about 5 days I had a nice little fuzzy face going...and when I looked in the mirror I liked it and realized I kinda missed that...obviously I shaved but it was a nice change of pace and I really liked it

[KatieV]

It's not that I enjoy being a male; but its dictated by the chromosomes - XY - can't get around that, its a given, no choice in the matter. What would it be like to not have male impluses? Liberating, I think - a new, sensititive way to experience the world. Makes one dream about HRT.

Katy

[Confucius]

Interesting question for me. I grew up thinking that females were the privileged gender and girls just had it better in life than boys. I experienced gender envy. So I was shocked to hear that students in college sociology and gender courses are taught that men have unearned social, economic, and political advantages that are granted to them solely on the basis of their gender, and which are usually denied to women (called male privilege)

So I have been working on what specific solace is there in being a man... Well, we can pee standing up and that makes the world our urinal. But aside for that obvious benefit, what else?
1. Men are valued mostly on their abilities, while women are valued more than their appearances.
2. Society allows men to break away from the home for some personal time without negative judgement.
3. If a man can see another man wearing the same clothes without breaking into tears.
4. Men are more independent, self-sufficient, and enterprising.
5. Men do not receive negative judgement if their place isn't clean and decorated. They are not expected to do as much domestic work.
6. Men can walk around at night - alone. Women would fear that.
7. Men have a much less chance of being raped, or subjected to sexual harassment.
8. Men's bathroom lines move so much faster.
9. A man's sex life is personal. A women is judged for hers.
10. A man looks at the mirror and sees he best assets. A women looks in the mirror and sees her worst.

The list can go on and on, however the best thing about being a man is that he gets to love women. He gets to be a husband and a father. I find that is the most rewarding thing in life. A women needs a man to feel secure and protected. A man gets to protect a women and be her hero. That hero stuff is wonderful.

[Deedee Skyblue]

I enjoy having my male parts. When I was in high school I competed in sports that were not available to the girls. I like being able to spend almost zero time getting dressed, especially when I'm in a hurry. If I wasn't male, cross dressing wouldn't be nearly as fascinating. I probably wouldn't have quite the same obsession with boobs if I had my own. I can go out with women without having to come out of the closet. There are a lot of things women worry about that I would never think about, for example, I was extremely surprised when a very generous friend of mine told me she would never give money to someone on the street - because reaching for money would reveal where she kept her money and increase her vulnerability. All those things and more, I would never give up in order to be female.

When I have a problem or an issue, my first, second and third responses are to find the solution, preferably by myself. Many (not all) want to tell someone else all about their problems, not to get help solving them, but to get empathy. I prefer to solve the problem first, and then deal with the emotions second. I like it that way. I'm not saying I wouldn't BE that way if I was female - but I think the chance is pretty high.

Deedee

[Alice Torn]

As a guy, i constantly have to work on my car, and get filthy and greasy, and sore from it. I would not want to be in lady mode full time, having to do that.

[Samantha Clark]

[snip]

So I have been working on what specific solace is there in being a man... Well, we can pee standing up and that makes the world our urinal. But aside for that obvious benefit, what else?
1. Men are valued mostly on their abilities, while women are valued more than their appearances.
2. Society allows men to break away from the home for some personal time without negative judgement.
3. If a man can see another man wearing the same clothes without breaking into tears.
4. Men are more independent, self-sufficient, and enterprising.
5. Men do not receive negative judgement if their place isn't clean and decorated. They are not expected to do as much domestic work.
6. Men can walk around at night - alone. Women would fear that.
7. Men have a much less chance of being raped, or subjected to sexual harassment.
8. Men's bathroom lines move so much faster.
9. A man's sex life is personal. A women is judged for hers.
10. A man looks at the mirror and sees he best assets. A women looks in the mirror and sees her worst.

[snip]


Usually I agree with the posts I see from Confucius, but in my view, while some of this is true, other points are pretty gender normative and gender binary. I take the question to be why do I enjoy being male and not why a GM should enjoy being male. Sorry if I misread the post.

[Erica Marie]

Honestly there is nothing I can think of that a women could not do as well as a man, again besides going to the toilet standing, and of course child birth. I hunt and fish and I know women who can do any of it way better than me. I do woodworking and tinker with mechanical stuff, again no reason a women couldnt do it. Just like anything, not even all men can do the same things other men can do. So if I had the choice I rather be female and still do what I do.

[JenniferYager]

I enjoy being male because that's how I was born, and I've learned to accept what is handed to you and make the best of it. So I enjoy doing things guys do, and I also enjoy my time crossdressing. If suddenly tomorrow I woke up and was a woman, I would accept it and make the most of it. For me it's more about blooming where you are planted.

[Julie Denier]

I think you're missing the point of the statement "I enjoy being a male".

Just as some people know instinctively that they are a woman trapped in a man's body. I know instinctively that I am a man. I love the trappings of femininity, especially the clothes, but do not wish to be female physically.


B

That about says it for me, too.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Melissa, I guess that is the male bonding plus all of my male hobbies.

[Marcelle]

Hi Melissa,

You are correct there is nothing I do as a guy that I could not do as a girl. However, for me when I say I enjoy being male it means the same thing as that I enjoy being female I am the same person just dressed differently. However, my male identity is a big part of who I am (been carrying him for 50 years) and would no sooner give him up then I would put Isha back in her box. As well, my male identity is a big part of my wife's life so I would not rob her of that part of me. She still loves me regardless of who I present as but I am fooling myself if I think she would not be put off if I boxed "boy me" in favor of "girl me".

So it is not just about enjoying being a guy . . . I enjoy being me. Guy me just happens to take up 80% of my time. :)

[MsVal]

I enjoy being male because...

From my first breath, I have been male. I was treated as male, clothed as male, educated as male, played as male. I had male hobbies, male emotions, male perspectives... in short, I have been socialized as a male. IT'S WHAT I KNOW BEST. As much as I enjoy being feminine for a while, it is for my own comfort and enjoyment. It is not for the "Real World".

In the Real World, there are careers to be mastered, corporate ladders to climb, chores to be done, families to raise, and more. I know 10,000 time more about handling those as a man than I do as a woman. When faced with serious challenges, I am MUCH more comfortable confronting them from my male perspective than female.

I enjoy being male because I am so much better at being male than female.

Best wishes
MsVal

[DollMaria]

I love dressing as a woman but I love being a man. I like having a penis and adore using it. Simple but true.

[mechamoose]

my male identity is a big part of who I am (been carrying him for 50 years) and would no sooner give him up then I would put Isha back in her box.

I guess part of my issue is the difference between 'being' male and 'feeling' male.

Because I'm male, I get to lift big things. I get to bulk up when I exercise. I get aggressive mood swings because of hormones. I have to shave different places. I have different medical risks.

But that has nothing to do with how that *feels*.

I love my male body. It is well formed, strong and capable. My female-imaged self is a little 5' slip of a thing. Nothing like what I live in day to day. I'd sooner break a stained glass window than try and make my 6'2" self fit into that 5' image.

- MM

[noeleena]

Hi,

What could a male do that we females, could not do.

We had no say in political matters we could not own land or property we were slaves we were owned by men in marrage only as chattels we were worth nothing.

we were used sexualy and if we were in child we were taken away because we were the lowest of the low, yet we had the child and had to bring them up many times with no help from the male who got us pregnant. we were servants and abused, on the job,

We were used abused and cast out, that was our lot if we were not married and even then we were no more than a sex item. or a show item

Those who were counted as of some value were married to the rich because of family ties or married off to make family ties to large estates .

before 1890's for many our lot in life was pretty hard, and through the world wars, worse,

so the time for change came or started to after 1900's 1920's. on .

i can take you back to the 1300's were our people came from both in Scotland and Prussia , and you men in some ways would be better off as for us war after war, not much life to be had then and its a wonder many of our women gave birth at all and many died in childbirth,

are we better off to day in many ways yes in others no .

Victorian times .....hmmm......

If this was the Victorian times i doubt you'd be cross dressing just some thing to think about,

...noeleena...

[5150 Girl]

Personally, I hate my male side with every fiber of my being! There is nothing I would miss about "him" if I woke up in the morning to find God had miracled me over night into the woman I know I should have been.

[Connief]

Personally, I hate my male side with every fiber of my being! There is nothing I would miss about "him" if I woke up in the morning to find God had miracled me over night into the woman I know I should have been.

I could not agree with you more!

[bobbimo]

Its the ease of life as a male.
If I dont want to shave for a few days.. thats ok.
If dont want to shower everyday.. thats OK
If I just dont care about my shirt and pants getting ruined with grease dirt, and wearing them all day.. thats OK
If I really want to fart or belch.. thats OK.
Put on the panties and ALL that changes.
Bobbi

[NicoleScott]

Perhaps there are those who think that "males are better at" whatever and that's why they enjoy being male - but the only way I'm going to know is to ask the question.


Melissa, I replied the way I did (#18) because your set-up statement was about being male or female, while your questionswas about doing things as a male or female. But I see how you connected the two (quote above). No, I have never heard a male say he enjoyed being male because he was better than females at certain things.

In a "let's see who is better" contest, men would pick running, jumping, or lifting heavy weights to see who is better, while a woman might say "first one to have a baby wins". We're just different. Thank goodness.

[Sallee]

I guess I'll go with the majority here and say there is Nothing that a woman can't do that a man can do. Except maybe get paid less for the same output. I just find it is fun to cross dress some times and after awhile I get bored with it and go back I do think women can be teasers more than men can to women but since I am not a woman maybe I am wrong there. Most of this type of questions can be refereed to as the differences between the genders

[sometimes_miss]

I like to hang out with other guy friends, watch sports, watch girls go by, and not have to maintain a constant barrage of meaningless conversation that goes nowhere. Very often, many women always feel the need to constantly chatter, often about nothing in particular, going off on tangents, and to no end point. While I've learned to do this in order to get women to find me more interesting to date, I don't particularly enjoy it, and would be quite happy if they'd just STFU. Guys have no such need, and we can be in the same room for hours watching a game, and never utter a word, and feel perfectly fine with that.

[StephanieinSecret]

I enjoy being a man when...
...I strip off my shirt on a blistering hot summer day,
...my SO puts their head on my chest to sleep,
...I come home from a hard days work with that good soreness in my muscles,
...I'm doing martial arts,
...i'm taking the, shall we say, "assertive role"... :devil:
...I slip behind a tree to get my buisness done, especially in the wee morning hours :drink:

....so yeah. There's a lot to love about men, and a lot to love about being one.
I just like pretending to be a girl sometimes too- it's a whole new way of seeing the world, a whole new set of sensations to relish.

[Helen_Highwater]

Ok I'm generalising a bit but I think it's fair to say that for many here it's as much about adopting the persona of a female as it is the clothes. We often say to those new to CD'ing that they should observe GG's to gain their mannerisms and it's things like that which are at the heart of this issue. Example:watch a group of GG's having a drink and compare their behaviour to that of a "bunch" of guys.
While both are out for a drink, the style is different which is why I want to retain my male side. The group dynamics are different. Yes GG's can do just about everything a male can do and visa versa. They just do it differently.

[mechamoose]

How about I phrase it like this?

If you feel like a girl regardless of attire, you are a girl. If you feel like a guy when doing guy things but you enjoy feeling like a girl 'en femme', then you are in between. (TG, TS, CD). If you feel like a guy regardless of how your present, then you are a guy.

Why is it complicated?

I'm both. I *get* that I'm both. I'm good with that

Don't focus on what you look like, focus on what you *feel* like. Who *are* you.. in your private moments when nobody else is around?

THAT is who you are.

I enjoy being a guy because I'm half male. I love the opportunities it gives me. I'm also in love with my female half, because it gives me *other* opportunities.

<3

- MM

[Butterfly Bill]

I've seen a lot of responses to various questions that include the phrase "I enjoy being a male too much to want to be female" (and similar responses). So my question is: What do you do as a male that you don't think you could do as a female?

Pee while standing up -- especially when outside far from plumbing.

[devida]

Interesting thread. I try, and it is difficult, to separate gender, sex and sexuality because they are actually three different things. Bear with me. I know defining stuff is difficult but it is important.

Sex is what kind of sexual organs we have, though even this isn't definitive since even on this thread there is at least one person who should not have been defined male at birth. There are intersex people and people who present external male characteristics but internally some female. But male and female are probably OK if you recognize these are defined male at birth (dmab, amab, camab ) or defined female at birth (dfab, afab, cafab) where d stands for defined, a stands for assigned, and ca stands for coercively assigned. They are not definitive. There are plenty of people who don't fit even this. As one of my favorite writers says it is kind of creepy the way people associate gender with what's between their legs, kind of obsessive.

Gender is what you feel comfortable describing yourself to be, generally male or female but sometimes both, neither, changing, or perhaps associated with something not even human, animal or mineral, but an alien artificial intelligence. This is because gender refers to identity and gender is actually the most important of the three because gender refers to the way we see ourselves to be. It is at the basis of our self definition. And we can define ourselves precisely the way it makes us happiest. Why ever would this not be true?

Sexuality is who you want to love, male, female, plant, mythological creature, whatever. I object to people wanting to have sex with animals and children because of the power imbalance and the damage this causes, but if you want to have sex with a unicorn, go for it!

It's complicated but we might as well get used to complexity.

So when someone says they would never give up being male, what are they saying?

Are they saying they don't want sexual reassignment surgery? They want to keep male parts and/or don't want to take hormones? It's no longer a requirement of being transgender that you do this and it's never been a requirement among the cross dressing community that you do this.

Are they saying they want to retain male privilege? Good luck! I do think this is delusional outside of smaller and smaller enclaves of traditional male dominated societies who have not got the message that females are increasingly more important to social functioning and economic well being than men are. So, Confucius, enjoy your privilege as long as you can. It is simply not going to last more than a few years. Women are finally waking up to just how much more competent they are than men at creating a functional society that values happiness and personal peace and well being. Maybe men can destroy civilization before this happens but I doubt even that.

Are they saying they are heterosexual males and don't want to become queer bisexuals or gay men? Again, most people are heterosexual and being trans has very little to do with sexual orientation/preference/desire. Don't confuse fantasy with actual sexualility. Trans, as the end of the word suggests, is all about gender (see above).

So, to answer the question solely from my perspective:

I have primary male characteristics. I like to think I have secondary female characteristics but, you know, YMMV.

I am non binary. I see neither a man nor a woman when I look in the mirror but something comfortably, but not at some defined place, between. Sometimes I am more butch, sometimes more femme but I am never a guy or a girl.

I am fluid sexually. I do, in my heart, love everybody and everything, and if sex is a part of that I would probably be down for it. But I don't know and I won't second guess myself.

[docrobbysherry]

Nearly EVERYONE HERE who says they like being male would choose FEMALE if they could keep their existing plumbing!:o

[Saikotsu]

After so many years of being male to all but a few select people, I enjoy the male role I've played in their lives. This isn't a role that's been forced on me, but one that evolved naturally. It's not about camping, doing yard work or sharing beers while watching sports. I've been Son, Brother, Dad, Grandpa, Uncle and buddy to a lot of wonderful people and to break that image they have of me would be difficult. I would know I'm the same person and many of them could make the adjustment, but some of the people I care about the most would find it difficult. That would make those relationships about something else and I don't have the energy or desire to try and change something that has worked so well for so long.

I've thought a lot about what parts of my life would improve if I began to share more of my female side with others. It would make some things more complicated for a while, but it's not something I need to do to stay happy. The kind of life I have now works fairly well for me and with a little effort and opening up to a couple of close family in the future should be enough, for me.

You've said the words I've been looking for. I've still got a lot more thinking to do regarding my female side, but everything is spot on with my male side. I've built up a wonderful life as Adam that I don't want to sacrifice so I can be Adyson. Yet, Adyson wants more than she has, so I'm still figuring out the right balance between the two. Regardless, I enjoy my male side for the connections and bonds I've formed.