It Killed the Cat

[Foxglove]

Hi, Everybody!

Sometimes I get a bit curious about this and that, and here's one of my latest. A question for TRANSSEXUAL members only, please.

(1) For the girls: If you could go back to the moment of your conception and you were given a choice of being born either trans female or cis female, presumably you'd choose to be cis female. But if your choice was to be trans female or cis male, which would you choose?

(2) Similarly for the guys: If your choice was to be trans male or cis male, presumably you'd choose to be cis male. But if your choice was to be trans male or cis female, which would you choose?

Any comments are welcome.

Best wishes to all,
Foxglove

[Donna Joanne]

I'd still prefer to be me, a trans female. Because I would still be the same person, just "reborn". My soul/psyche/whatever you term it would still be female.

[I Am Paula]

I failed so miserably at every attempt to be male, it would be too foreign to me. Trans female is fine.

[Aprilrain]

This question becomes moot and acidemic when veiwed through the lens of a completed transition. I know we never stop growing and learning but gender transition by definition must come to a conclusion and that end point for me is my body and life now match my mind and identity. There are times when I get sad, overwhelmed, depressed and angry that I have this condition, I might have a little cry about it but then I move on. I no longer wish to be anyone but myself.

IMO, If your going to transition you should have an end point in mind. Maybe that's just hormones maybe it's SRS, maybe all you feel you need is FFS, what ever it is plan for it and work towards it, once you've achieved it move on. The plan can change the end point can change and then you reasses but always be working toward your goal. The last thing you want is to be stuck with no clear idea of where your going.

[Marleena]

I would prefer not be trans anything.. Cismale or female would not matter to me really. I expect those that had or are having a smooth transition will have a different answer though.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

To me it is one dead cat ..

I wish lots of things

[becky77]

This comes up a lot. Like the pill question.

If I was born cis male I wouldn't be me, so whats the point? Might as well say if you could have been aborted would you.
My identity is my identity change it and I no longer exist. I'm female, regardless of body born, if you answer this question differently maybe your in the wrong section?

[Starling]

Without buying into the hypothetical, I would say it's preferable to be cis-anything, because it saves time and energy better spent on simply living and growing.

:) Lallie

PS: The hypothetical assumes knowledge and a choice the fetus does not have. But knowing what I know as an (all-too) adult transsexual, I would choose to be a cis-female, even if it would erase all memory of being trans (and thus the joy of transformation without transition), because women have so much more latitude to become. And I certainly would not choose to remain an MTF, as I don't in the least subscribe to the thrill of GD.

[Jorja]

For me, cisfemale would be my choosing. That didn't happen so I corrected it as soon as I could.

[GabbiSophia]

Marlene I second that
.. This is a medical condition and who would ever want a medical condition? I just want to be me with out all the garbage...wait that's what life is all about right?

[Leah Lynn]

I would opt for cis female, as well. I would want all the experiences of growing up to womanhood; everything I've observed, but was deprived of participating.

Leah

[KellyJameson]

What I was, through no fault of my own, hurt alot of people who got caught up into the vortex of my dysphoria.

Everything is behind me now and I can say that the experience deepened my humanity and understanding so through all the pain and confusion much good came out of it but I don't like hurting people, particularly when they are innocent and undeserving of the hurt that was caused.

The dysphoria had a disruptive affect on my life that was very disruptive to others on so many levels.

It is an internal war that has external consequences. You never go through this alone. It affects all those around you.

I walked out of my parents lives when I was nineteen so I could live as I must. I was always abandoning people to hold onto my identity and than feeling guilty.

It really tears your life apart.

Yes, I would have preferred to be born a cisgendered male. I knew something was seriously wrong by the time I was five without being able to actually give it words because I was to afraid of what adults would do to me.

Somehow I knew it would be dangerous to tell the truth about what I knew to be true.

Everything is behind me but I walked through hell to get here. I would never wish this on anyone and I'm always amazed by the happiness and excitement many show as they transition.

To me it has been like some kind of dreadful torture the fates imposed on me.

[Foxglove]

Thanks to everyone for your replies, which I've found very interesting.

This is where this question comes from: I was in denial for many long years. Having been out full-time for a year and a half, I've found that everything changes. The way you see things, the way you view yourself, etc.

One thing I've discovered is that after a lifetime of shame, guilt, etc., the usual suspects, I actually like what I am. I've realized that I feel a certain dignity within that I've never felt before.

Now being trans costs you a lot. We all know that. But if I could change things, be the cismale that society always demanded that I be? I wouldn't change. It's rather nice being able to like yourself. I simply have no interest in being a "normal male".

I know that cispeople would find this attitude crazy. Who would want to be trans? Well, obviously, I'd have preferred to be cis female. That's what was intended but somebody screwed up somewhere. But I have no interest in being male of any sort.