Sisters that accept/help

[Patti Remick]

I read so many posts dealing with wives/SOs that accept/help (or not). But I wondering how many have sisters (actual female siblings, not 'friend' sister) who accept/help with your CDg? I am interested because the dynamics between brother and sister are completely different than between spouses/SOs. When did you tell your sister or how did she find out? Im very interested in knowing if your sister(s) suspected you were a CDr from an early age and/or before you told them.

Thank you and sincerely
Patti Remick

[Alice Torn]

My sister is 65, never dated or married, has a severe speech impediment, and is somewhat socially like a 12 year old, and goes to a Lutheran church. she went to as a child with mother. When my mom died, she almost lost it! So, she is actually a little girl inside. I told her once, that a t a singles dance, < accidentally danced with a man dressed like a tall lady. She grimaced, and gave the impression it was awful, and i mentioned i had a neighbor who dressed up as a lady at times. I decided it was not a good idea to tell her about my dressing, from these impressions. She would tell my dad , and hostile brother, and he would tell his twin in prison, and i would never be accepted, or respected, and would be ridiculed even more than now!I saw her watching television, and on the show , once, was a comedy with a CD. She seemed to be enjoying it. Another time, just a week ago, the same thing. An old Barney Miller show episode with a guy dressed up, but, it appeared it was humiliating for the CD. She seemed unaffected by it. But, I am just not going to tell her, unless she show signs of accepting crossdressers.

[sandra-leigh]

My sister accepts my transition, but she does still have some difficulty with using my new name.

[Teresa]

That's an interesting question, I would never confide in her but if I did she'd probably take a swipe at me for wearing her clothes as a child !

[Linda E. Woodworth]

None of my sisters know and I have no intention of telling them.

[Barbie Anne]

I don't have any sisters, but I did recently come out to a female cousin who I've been quite close with over the years. May as well be my sister. She Not only was accepting and supportive but let on that she'd figured it out years ago and was letting me have my illusion of secrecy lol. Can't wait to get together with her and go shopping at macy's in N.Y.C. next year. Plans already in the works :)

[typhoidmary]

I live with my sister so I see her all the time. she's perfectly accepting of how I present myself, she just kind of treats it like it's normal and doesnt really make any reference to it.

[Mink]

in 2003 at the age of 19 I told my sister... who is two years older... she was mostly okay but a bit mad weirded out that I had worn her stuff! ... in some ways I came to regret telling her... she'd use it against me in moments of anger... she told my dad without my permission or knowledge (!) ... she wasn't even that fun to go shopping with! ... even years later she still doesn't quite "get" it... though she'd be a supporter in me going out in public and such.... so it was a thing of many ups and downs / positives and negatives!

her main complaint is that I just have wayyyy too much stuff and don't need to get any more (EVER) and telling me how no girl will want to date a guy that has so much lingerie / clothes / more than they have...

[Alice Torn]

Teresa, and Mink. So rue about sisters knowing we wore their stuff! I am sur my sister noticed her stretched swim suit, and torn and ruined pantyhose. It was at that time about age 14, that my mom did not mention it, but tried to get me to a shrink. They knew, and like you say, to tell her now would trigger that bad memory in her.

[dana digs sweaters]

Hi Patti, only boy with 5 sisters.
Plenty of dress-up games plus Halloween too growing up.
4 still live around me and have seen me numerous times. The 5th has seen my pics.
Out to one sis at 12 and another at 15.
The others after I moved out after high school.
Always been their "other sister" :)

[AimeeG]

I came out to my sister about a year ago while she was visiting with my mom (whom I came out to earlier in the week). She had seen my lock screen on my Ipad and had asked, "who is that?" on our way to lunch. I showed her a bunch of pictures to see if she could figure it out and she finally did after a while. We talk more than we did before, but she doesn't help me because I can do make-up better than she can and I probably have a bigger wardrobe than she does. Her and my other sister(that I haven't talk to for 10 years for another reason) used to dress me up as a living doll when I was young, but don't remember. She stated, "I guess you were OK with us dressing you as a kid?" and I responded..."you might want to talk to MOM about that!

[Farrah]

My sisters don't have a clue and I intend to keep it that way! :)

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Patti, I don't feel the need to burden my two sisters with this.

[Adriana]

Well, about 9 years ago my sister found out by accident when she got on my computer to do an internet search.....this site and several others came up for one reason or another (darn internet history). She ask me a few questions about it and went on her merry way. She is a very open minded individual and excepted my CDing.

[Adriana Moretti]

hey Patti....my sister was the VERY first person I came out too but it was a unique situation.....We kinda had a coming OUT party....she wanted to tell me she was gay....I told her that was awesome...and I like to put on a dress ! We have a very good, but rather unique relationship. I dont know your situation, but girls have an easy time digesting our lifestyle.. so..in my family its one lesbian...and 1 crossdresser...yup.

[JessMe]

Like Adriana, my sister was the first one I ever came out to. I don't remember my exact age at the time (preteen though), but I remember the situation perfectly: my sister and I were talking in my room when suddenly she said "and just what is thiiiiis?" I could only stammer as she held up a bra I had forgotten to return to its rightful owner. Needless to say, I told her then about her big sister and she was VERY cool about it and has stayed that way throughout the years. :) Being from a navy family, my sister and I were always close, but I think her knowing about Jess has made us closer.

[ClaudineD]

Oldest sister was my biggest advocate and compelling force to allow me to be "Out" at age 15.....2 other sister fully embraced my choices when young and all continue to this date to treat me as a sister at all gatherings......very lucky individual.....liberal parents with very bohemian type Mom who gave my sisters a great perspective on life.....

[MeganDay]

My sister is a cast-iron, narrow-minded, bigoted bitch, so no, probably not. (Don't hold back, Megan, tell us how you really​ feel!)

[Michelle (Oz)]

My sister and my wife are like two pees in a pod ... not good for moi. My sister's son is TS ... not good for him/her either.

[Sheila11]

I am beyond sure that it would not go well. The questions would never stop. Never ever stop. No acceptance just never ending questions.

[Jocelyn Quivers]

My sister was the first person I ever told, luckily for me it went well, she accepted, and actually had the viewpoint of "That's it?" "This is what you were nervous about?" "I thought you were going tell me you have 1 week to live?" She was very supportive in going shopping with me and helping me out during my early years. She was also very supportive and helping to be more confident by essentially telling me in a manner of speaking "I'm kicking you out of the nest, it's time for you to learn to fly on your own, you don't need me to be with you every time you go shopping, most GG do not care what you are buying and will assume it's for your wife or girlfriend." Currently we do not discuss any of my gender issues, being that there's no need currently, although I have not shown her any recent pictures of me, the last one's I showed her I looked very different as opposed to now weight wise, and had not developed any fashion sense at the time.

[Dena]

I've told 2 of my 5 sisters, they're cool about it. But it just never comes up as it's not part of our relationship.

[TinaZ]

Oldest sister was my biggest advocate and compelling force to allow me to be "Out" at age 15.....2 other sister fully embraced my choices when young and all continue to this date to treat me as a sister at all gatherings......very lucky individual.....liberal parents with very bohemian type Mom who gave my sisters a great perspective on life.....


My sister is a cast-iron, narrow-minded, bigoted bitch, so no, probably not. (Don't hold back, Megan, tell us how you really​ feel!)

I'm amused that Megan and Claudine's answers were right next to each other. I have no idea how Megan was raised but if it was in a strict environment (and maybe it was, based on how uptight the sister seems), it only proves that cross dressers can spring from any background. So why aren't more parents like Claudine's folks? Imagine growing up with the desire to explore your female side without fear and shame!

My first memory of cross dressing was when I was around 5. I tried on some of my mom's pantyhose. To this day I remember the joyous thrill of that experience. That was 37 years ago and I only just recently decided I was making a deliberate effort to cast away the shame of this part of myself, and to explore and enjoy the experience bending genders. That's 37 years of disliking a part of myself, of feeling a bit perverted, like a freak, alone, sometimes angry and confused.

Imagine being raised in an environment where the parents tell you that exploring these aspects of your full self is normal and expected, and that almost everything in life is a giant spectrum, not an either-or proposition.

Wouldn't that be amazing and refreshing?

P.S. I love my sis to bits, but she's a fundamentalist Christian and lives life with all kinds of "either/or" beliefs, so alas, no; I won't be telling her.

[Tami Monroe]

hey Patti....my sister was the VERY first person I came out too but it was a unique situation.....We kinda had a coming OUT party....she wanted to tell me she was gay....I told her that was awesome...and I like to put on a dress ! We have a very good, but rather unique relationship. I dont know your situation, but girls have an easy time digesting our lifestyle.. so..in my family its one lesbian...and 1 crossdresser...yup.

In my case, my wife knows, but my brother (my only blood relative left) does not. I think ultimately, he would accept that, but I do not want to take any chances. Especially since he is 7 years older than me, and has health problems.

[jaymee144]

I once attended a drag ball at my school and was very open about it. I actually posted a picture from that night as my profile picture for a while, my sister didn't react negatively she laughed and said "stop dressing like a girl!!" I really do think jokingly. I don't know if I'll tell her though I suspect it wouldn't at all surprise her. She would probably bring up the whole growing up wearing her things which is an awkward conversation I don't think I want to have as sorry as I am about it:S.

[Princess29]

I have told my sister (and several others) and it could not have gone better. I doubt I would ever dress around her, even if the opportunity presented itself but she is fully supportive and I can talk to her about anything ranging from the most trivial of matters to the most serious. I am lucky that I have a great relationship with my sister. I would have sworn when I told her, that she suspected something or now that she knew, some things from the past might make more sense but she said she had no idean

[lingerieLiz]

My sisters have known since I was 5. Helped me dress and all. I inherited their clothes. Kept the poodle skirts and cool things from the 50s for a long time. Had lots of prom dresses etc. They taught me to dance backwards like girls do. I did promise not to wear their panties, but had my own. We are all still close but don't see each other much and don't talk about it as it is just accepted that I CD.

[AlexisWest]

I have two sisters, one 5 years older and the other, 10 years younger. Mom seems to think that the younger one would be okay with Alexis, but not the older. I also have 7 dyed-in-the-wool redneck brothers that would absolutely come unglued if they knew about a cross-dressing brother. I'm pretty sure a couple of them have their suspicions about me, but have never said anything. Younger sister has a certain amount of 'life baggage' that could cause her to spill the beans to the others in a moment of weakness, according to my mom. I'd love to be out to either of them, but alas twill never be.

[Melissa in SE Tn]

I have enjoyed reading the many responses to this interesting thread. Peace , mel

[Sabrina133]

Am kind of batting .500. I am out to my entire family. My older sister fully accepted from the beginning and is my maid of honer next month. My younger sister hasn't spoken to me since I came out.

Bree

[MissTee]

Have one sister and would n-e-v-e-r tell her. She is close minded and not accepting of anything even slightly askew of mainstream.

[DonnaG]

14 years ago I lost my wife to cancer, had two heart attacks, and lost a great job because I was failing to cope. I finally told a younger sister because I needed support and she had been helping me through the dark days. All went well for several years but finally came apart when she shared our secret with others because she was mad at me. That failure of trust has ruined our relationship. There is a lot of pain because of the loss but I do have the memories of the wonderful days when I could just be myself and share it with someone who I thought understood me.

[~leanne~]

I have an older sister who I'm very close to, I'd love to tell her but she'd want to know everything no doubt, i.e. When did it start? Well it started when I was a kid and I wore some of her things! That's the bit I'm scared off, how do you avoid telling all, I don't think she'd be impressed at the thought of me wearing her clothes and it may put a dampener on my coming out to her, suggestions anyone?

[Diedre]

I do not have any sisters, but I do have an older female cousin. When we were in our early teens she learned of my likings after she overheard my mother telling my aunt ( another story in it self that I already posted.)

My cousin approached me and said it would be our secret. She was amazing with her makeup skills and I could easily pass. It was around 1970 and we wore "Marcia Brady" type mini dresses. Her and my wife are the only ones that know about Diedre.

[AprilMayy<3]

For the moment, and the past 8 years actually, I have worn my sisters clothes. I still live at home, so I have access to them quite regularly. She does know, and she accepts it and her exact words are "Why would I care if you wear my clothes?". She even gave me some clothes she didn't want anymore, and knew I did :P So...I would assume she's pretty accepting. Now for helping...that's a different story. I haven't asked her for clothes advice or to go shopping with me, because she looks at my CD'ing as a "Out of sight, out of mind" kinda thing. So only time will tell if she feels like helping me or not, but if not that's no biggie. But I'm very, very glad she's accepting about it. :)

[dana digs sweaters]

Hi Leanne, being close to your older sister, she may already know about somebody else wearing her clothes.
Don't know if your younger sister(s) were unknowingly blamed. That has happened to some of us ;)
Of course questions will crop up.
At what age you started. How many times? Thru the years of growing up together? Did somebody catch you but not tell?
She may not ask you if you wore "everything".
Just part of the experience of dressing up in girl's clothes.

[JulesAlton]

My sister doesn't know. Hopefully she never finds out I wore her wedding dress . Lol

[RachelRICD]

My younger sister has no problem with me being a CD. In fact she and I go out frequently to parties, plays, concerts and for drinks. She refers to me as her aunt and has no issues introducing me to her friends or being seen with me in public.

[Dianne S]

Both of my sisters know and accept. They live far away, though, so aren't really in a position to assist. However, one of my sisters visited me (first visit since I disclosed) and she arrived with an epilator and some jewelry as gifts for me.

[Sharon B.]

Told my older sister when I was 17 and she was 23 it didn't wasn't a happy day. To this day I wish I had never told her but back in the day "1972" this type of thing just didn't happen unless you had a boyfriend that you dressed up for.

[Athena_]

My sisters both live out of my state. I think that the older one would not be supportive, but the younger one would be very supportive. Neither one of them can keep a secret, so that is one of the reasons that neither of them know anything about Athena. My sisters and mother helped me dress up as a girl for several halloweens when I was a pre-teen: twice in a white party dress and once as a cheerleader. I always thought that they suspected that I enjoyed crossdressing.

[dana digs sweaters]

Athena, you might be surprised at what female family members know what about you.

[FemPossible]

I have only told one of my sisters and we're currently working on my makeover but there are complications. Anyway, I told her because I knew she'd be cool with it.

[lovetobedani]

I feel that I could never tell my sister. I think that not only would she not accept me but would use it against me at her will.

[~leanne~]

My sister is older than me, I only dabbled for a short period, all I wore was her tights and a skirt a few times, I don't remember ever having tried her bra on but it was 30+ years ago! nothing has ever been said and I shouldn't think there were ever any suspicions! I may get off with bending the truth a little and say I intercepted things she threw out! I don't know!!! I think the prospect of her feeling I invaded her privacy may put a stop to my confessing.

[Janine cd]

I have only one sister. She is 3 years younger but remembers when I was 13 and suggested that we trade clothing and pretend that we are of opposite sex. That experience probably reaffirmed that I was a crossdresser.

[Golden God]

My sisters know, the younger one doesn't accept it, but she's very open-minded and believe she would help if I wanted to, but I don't know if she would like it.
The older one seems more supportive in that she doesn't say anything, positive or negative. Being from a Mexican Catholic family, that is supportive for the standards of my family.
Still, I've never wear anything in front of anyone (family or otherwise) and only go out very late at night (and by "going out" I mean circling my block).
You guys should be grateful for having supportive people who know and having the freedom to wear a simple skirt in the streets, I envy you (:

[Samantha Clark]

My sister doesn't know or have the remotest clue but I know she'd be totally ok. She's a touchy feely social worker and "hasbien". Look it up!

[immike]

Farrah-
I have 2 sisters also&they would probably drop me with a right cross if they knew I had worn their clothes(:heehee:) My
mom would hit the fan if she knew I had been dressing in her good wardrobe for years&lifting a stray pair of her new pantyhose,every one in awhile,as I would wear her dresses,all of her skirts&her soft silky blouses&her many colors of heels.
I've been in the closet since I was about 14 years old:tongueout

[Melodie]

Hi Patti, interesting post!
For me my sister and I look almost exactly alike but the funny thing is we BOTH feel like we got our places mixed up!
Growing up she would play with my bikes scooters and roller-blades, and for me I grew up playing with her barbie swimming pool party lol!!!
I remember when I came out to my sister it was when I was about... 17 or 18? She was definitely supportive because all of our cousins are males
so from there on we would do each others make up and she would help me do my hair and my eyebrows and we would go shopping together all the time ^_^.

[Thrymr's Bane]

My youngest sister is the only person in my family that knows. She's been completely supportive since the beginning and if she was confused by anything, it was that she has been around a lot of trans people and never around crossdressers. She's also REALLY into clothing so she's both enthusiastic and knowledgeable about what I want to wear. Things are still a little weird, mostly on my side of things, and I try to not smother her with everything, so we still don't talk about it often.

I know the rest of my family could handle it, since we're very socially liberal (at least in theory, as is often the case), but it would still be much more awkward. My dad probably wouldn't care, as he is extremely pragmatic about things and mostly cares that work gets done, my other two sisters would probably be amused, buy my mother and brother would probably ridicule me for a while.

[terri_sandal]

Yes sisters can be quite accepting ..I told mine over 10 years ago and she didn't have a problem with it at all ,no awkward questions just accepted it as me . Now we have even been out together dressed shopping it was so liberating

[justmetoo]

2 of my sisters (and several other female family members of mine) are my biggest supporters. I have gone shopping, sightseeing, and dining out with some of them on various occasions. I haven't gotten a lot of assitance per se, but that's mostly because I haven't needed or asked for much.