I got ma'am-ed for the first time. So Cool.

[Cheryl123]

Yesterday I went to my neighborhood Safeway. I dressed conservatively. I have a nice wig. I wore a touch of make-up, I look ok, but I'm not fooling anyone, and probably never will. But so what? Does that mean I must hide in my house for the rest of my life. I don't think so.

Anyway, I get a pizza, a bottle of wine and a few other items. With the exception of a few mainland tourists, customers in the store don't pay much attention to me. (I love Hawaii for this!) I still don't have enough nerve to go through the regular check-out, so I use the self-check-out machine. I scan my items. The machine talks to me and I talk back to it. Then a young clerk walks up and says: "Excuse me ma'am, because you bought the wine I have to tell the machine you are over 21." I reply, "But what if I'm not?" She laughs. It's fun. When I leave I wave at her and she says have a good day.

This all makes me feel very good about myself. End of story. I'm recounting it here because I know all of you will appreciate it. Thanks for listening.

[NavyM2F_WAM]

I remember when I was first "ma'amed". I was shocked. I couldn't believe that I would look good enough to be "confused" with a woman. Bring on more "ma'ams"!

[Michelle789]

Cheryl,

Congrats on getting ma'amed and on getting out of the house. Doesn't it feel amazing to go out as your authentic self, and doesn't it feel awesome to be gendered properly. I wish you many more outings, and many more ma'am and miss.

:) Michelle :)

[Cheryl123]

Thanks Charlotte and Michelle. Yes, bring on those ma'ams! And Michele "amazing" and "awesome" doesn't come close to describing how it feels to live as your self and have others -- perfect strangers -- accept you. But you girls know.

[Farrah]

I bet that was totally awesome!!...I haven't been ma'amed yet. Well I haven't really ventured out, but I hope when I do, I get ma'amed at least once!! Congrats on getting your ma'am!

[Kimberly Kael]

Isn't it odd how powerful a feeling it can provoke? Long before I realized I was transgender I found joy in the times when people would greet me as miss, and then a profound sense of loss when they corrected themselves. I still smile when addressed, which means I get to do a lot of smiling these days, though I've long since graduated from miss to ma'am for most people.

[Alexis.j]

It's really nice when people do that, as it is a sign of them 'accepting' you for who you really are, irrespective of how well you 'pass' ( I so hate that word!)

[mikiSJ]

I was at the San Francisco Zoo with some girlfriends a couple of weeks ago. While I was in the cafe check out line, a woman with a younger child told the child to "let the lady go ahead of you!"

First time and it felt nice.


... I've long since graduated from miss to ma'am for most people.Don't believe K for a second.

[becky77]

Congrats.

It's nice when someone makes an effort at being considerate.

[Ms Deidre]

I think the three happiest events during my transition were

Getting ma-am'ed

Truly needing a bra

My legal name change

There were a lot of other highlights, lowlights as well, but those 3 were milestones to me. Congrats Cheryl!

[Kimberly Kael]

I was at the San Francisco Zoo with some girlfriends a couple of weeks ago. While I was in the cafe check out line, a woman with a younger child told the child to "let the lady go ahead of you!"

First time and it felt nice.

Of course it did! Being recognized for who you are is wonderfully affirming, and it does eventually reach a point where the rare mis-gendering feels like it could have happened to anyone. I use the rare occasions when my wife gets sirred to remember that we all make snap judgements and sometimes they're simply wrong.

[Aprilrain]

I remember my first time. I was in the airport, I wasn't trying to look like a girl at all and a worker called me ma'am while directing me to a check in kiosk


Truly needing a bra

This was not a happy day for me I hate wearing them!

[Donna Joanne]

Was on my way to go shopping with two of my girlfriends yesterday morning. Was dressed in a cute top and denim skort, and my "Arbon-style" hat (I always loved the way she looked in that hat!). No makeup, no wig....just me. And guess what I come up on. A Sheriff's Department safety and seat belt check. Rolled down my window, said in my sweetest tone "Good morning Officer", and reached for my purse. He smiled and said "No need ma'am, just checking seat belts and I can see you have yours on, have a nice day!" My heart slowed down after about 10 minutes, but the smile lasted hours.

[rachael.davis]

I got "hunnied" at a Payless a few weeks ago (as in the SA coming over and saying "We've got some really nice new stuff in this week Hunny, can I help you find something)

Bliss