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View Full Version : Biggest step so far!



Suzanne F
07-23-2014, 01:30 PM
I made my biggest step yet this week. On Sunday night I got ready and went to a local AA meeting for the first time as Suzanne. A few of my friends that know were there. I don't attend this meeting regularly but most people there know me as Brent. I walked in with my head held high! My friend saved me a seat and I sat down. I received some knowing looks from people that knew about me being trans but had never seen Suzanne. 3 different women who know me as Brent came up and asked my name. They were stunned when I told them. The earth did not stop and everything was fine. Since this isn't a regular meeting for me I did not think it was necessary for me to share and explain anything.

The next evening was my regular meeting where everyone knows me. I got ready and headed over to coffee like I always do. The people at coffee were happy that I was going as me, Suzanne. We then went over to the meeting. Some people had heard about me from the preceding evening. I was greeted by one of the women with a big hug. One of my male friends was kind of mean when I went through the door. He said," I don't know what you think you are doing but good luck." Not in a good way. I shook it off and sat down in the back with 2 of my girlfriends who already knew about Suzanne. They dolted on me and I took a deep breathe. I had been waiting for this moment and it was finally here!

The topic was fellowship and how our live get better. A few people shared and I decided it was time. I moved into an empty chair more in the middle of the room and raised my hand. The secretary called on me. Here was the moment! I am Suzanne and I am an alcoholic. There I said it. Like music I heard ,"Hello Suzanne!" I couldn't believe it. I said how much the people at this meeting meant to me and I hoped I would never lose them. I said I would always be doing the same things I had for the last 12 years as far as sponsoring people and loving members of AA. I said I had learned that love an tolerance is the code of AA and I hoped that would be true in this case. Then I said thank you. In a totally unexpected and really inappropriate manner a manly man said, " What should we call you from now on, Suzanne?" Without missing a beat I said when I look pretty call me Suzanne. Everyone laughed and the tension just melted from the room.
I can't tell you how many people came up afterward to offer their support. It was overwhelming. Even the guy who had been rude at the door came up and apologized. I have received calls and texts from very unexpected sources thanking me for my courage and honesty. I am now free to be who I want at my home group of AA. What a blessing !

Kaitlyn Michele
07-23-2014, 01:38 PM
What a blessing indeed!!! Way to go!!!!

I know that took a lot of guts and i'm really happy that the experience was positive.

Big time kudos to you!!!

Brianna_H
07-23-2014, 02:46 PM
Bravo! That took so much courage. What a beautiful story.

Don't know if you happen to be a Stephen King fan, but his recent novel Doctor Sleep is sort of a love letter to AA. The main character also has a big revelation he is nervous about sharing with his group. It's a beautiful plotline in a strong novel overall.

Congratulations on overcoming the sarcasm and being yourself. You give me hope.

Nigella
07-23-2014, 02:49 PM
Sometimes we are surprised by the response from those who we expect to be against us. Glad all went well and that there are many more steps along the way. :hugs:

Christen
07-23-2014, 05:49 PM
So pleased for you!

Christen x

Rachel Smith
07-23-2014, 07:27 PM
Way to go Suzanne!!! Your story brought back many fond memories for me when I came out to family and friends. You are now free from one more of your prisons.:bighug: :clap:

PretzelGirl
07-23-2014, 09:32 PM
I am happy for you Suzanne! It was a tough step but I will bet your recovery will feel more complete when you are approaching it as your real self. Good luck!

jeri1973
07-23-2014, 11:05 PM
That is so great. I'm sure you will continue to get more comfortable going out as your true self. Enjoy every minute of it.

chelyann
07-23-2014, 11:25 PM
Suzanne
way to go, this may make your life easier and help your journey

Michelle789
07-24-2014, 12:15 AM
Suzanne,

I am really happy that you are getting to be yourself at your AA meetings. Isn't that freeing? I am hoping to come out soon at my home group. I've been scared to do so, but I think I'm ready to do so. You are really an inspiration Suzanne, and I am really proud of you :)

kimdl93
07-24-2014, 06:05 AM
That's a huge step, Suzzanne. Huge step and a humbling moment for that rude guy.

traci_k
07-24-2014, 07:22 AM
Suzanne - So very happy for you. Great Story - thank you for sharing.

Hugs,

Suzanne F
07-24-2014, 10:15 AM
Last night I went to my regular Wednesday open meeting with my wife and son. We usually go to the meeting and then to dinner. There I was in a skirt with my family. I couldn't have dreamed that was possible a year and a half ago. There were a few awkward moments with a few of the guys. However most people were fine with it. To top it off, my wife and I had a calm discussion about hormones later that night. I think she has come to terms with me taking them next year.
Suzanne

Rachel Smith
07-24-2014, 04:53 PM
Little steps become milestones.