are all men crossdressers deep down?

[Natalie_393]

Good question!!

obviously we don't know the answer to that question and never will but its a interesting topic to discuss
I just ask myself sometimes how many guys out there have cross dressed at least once just to try out of curiosity
Or wonder did they like it ? How many times did they do it? Are there statistics out there? Like is 1 and 10 men cross dress 1 and 1000????? 1 and 10,000??? Or is your uncle a cross dresser?? How about the guy that served you coffee this morning at dunkin donuts does he slip on a black dress with 5 inch heels when he gets home?? Its crazy when you think about it we cross dress and yes some are private about it and some let the world know there loud and proud but the question remains does every men have that urge inside them?

[CynthiaD]

I would guess that most men never even think about it. But I could be wrong ...

[PaulaQ]

Lol, no. Most men are not cross dressers. Maybe 3% are.

[Nadine Spirit]

I think it is an interesting thought. I totally disagree. But I think it is interesting.

I would suppose that what makes us who we are (transgender of some sort or other) is that it is totally natural to try on things of the opposite gender. I know to me it just was and not something I put a whole lot of thought into. So in imagining others, it might appear that it would be natural for anyone and everyone to have these same thoughts to some degree or other. But I believe that it just doesn't work that way.

We think of it because we are trans and they don't think of it because they are not.

[Jenniferathome]

...obviously we don't know the answer to that question and never will ...

No, we know the answer. It is "no." We cross dressers are the unique ones. Most men don't even like going into the women's department of any store. Don't kid yourself.

[Walkintallnheels]

Just an observation, was in a sports bar recently and made a bet to the SO that every GG that walked in, the guys would look down at there feet or shoes first . Boy was I right on. Most of the women entering was wearing nice heels or shoes, needless to say she lost the bet.
Is every man programmed to pick up on sexy legs and heels? Does this make him curious what the other side is like?
Is there something deep down that makes even the straightest of men wonder ?
I guess!
WKITnheels

[MelanieAnne]

I think for every crossdresser, there are many more men who think about it, but can't bring themselves to do it. Some men think it will make them gay. Others aren't too secure about their manhood. Most men are turned on by high heels, nylons, bras, and lingerie. To think we are the only ones who actually try those items on is a real stretch.

[litlejohn]

Going back to high school. How many superjocks dressed up as cheerleaders for homecoming? Happened every year at my school, what about yours? And I was the out of place dude?

[janetcgtv]

I would say that the odds are bout 1 in 20 males are interested in wearing women's clothes. Most men if buying women's clothes are interested in their wife or girl friend to take them off.

[Jenniferathome]

I think far too many responders are trying to justify a normalcy of sorts. Fear? Were we all not fearful of putting that first pair of underwear or dress or makeup? But we DID it. If you are a cross dresser, you will cross dress. If you are a "normal" guy, you won't. They have no interest. Why do men look at women's legs? Because we're men! Why do the jocks wear a cheerleaders out fit? As a joke. Ocher's razor kids.

Oh, and as Freud said, "Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar." Come on.

[Kris Avery]

The famous Life cereal commercial....

"Try it...you will like it" :)

[natcrys]

"If I want to crossdress, then surely others must have that feeling deep down as well, right?" LOL.. projecting much? ;)

No, most men don't have this urge to crossdress (or fall anywhere in the whole range of T*-related things one can be/do). And no, wearing a kilt in Scotland or those white robes in the Middle-East don't count.

Stats on this are varying.. but the 1 in 10-20 seems to be most agreed on. So sure, it might be your mailman or stockbroker.. but more likely than not.. he's just a guy doing typically guy things never even thinking about crossdressing unless he's watching Tootsie. :P

[Marcelle]

I have to agree with most in that we (CDers) are a small percentage of the population. Now it is plausible that lots of men have tried a bit of the "old role play" at home with a SO as a sort of kink but that does not make them a CDer as it is done then no compulsion afterwards . . . just a bit of experimentation to spice things up :battingeyelashes: Anyone can put on a Superman costume but that doesn't necessarily make them Superman.

Hugs

Isha

[Tinkerbell-GG]

At this point in time it's a very taboo social activity and honestly I think that means it's at the height of it's popularity. For every man who cross dresses for gender reasons, I'd bet there are at least one hundred who dress because it's 'naughty'. Bring in social acceptance and men wearing whatever they want and I'd bet your numbers grow smaller. Not bigger. Just a thought.

In relation to the original question, I'd say yes, most men have contemplated trying on the outfits women wear (mother of sons here so I've seen it all) and no, most don't form a long term habit or even try anything on in the first place. But nearly ALL heterosexual men notice women and what they wear and I'd bet my left leg on that. My H is the crossdresser, but I've had at least FIVE boyfriends prior to him who all had very serious opinions on what I wore. One even chose my outfits! None, as far as I know, we're crossdressers.

So is crossdressing a normal male thought process gone a little awry?? Yep, that's my guess. But complicating things is what we humans do and this is one very complicated activity! :)

[Kate Simmons]

Don't know about CDers but all men are 50% women on a genetic level if you want to get technical (XY). We know that all fetuses are female up to a certain development level when the Y chromosome acts to ensure a male. Don't know if that really explains anything but it sounds good anyway.:heehee::battingeyelashes::)

[jandebs]

Surely just about everyone at some time or other will try to imagine what it would be like to be the other gender. After toying with the idea for a while the vast majority will drop the thought and move on. For me, and probably most trans people, that thought was accompanied by a deep sense of regret and longing, that I would never be anything other than my assigned gender.

And that thought wasn't just a 'one off', a childhood imagining, like being invisible, or living on Mars. It reoccurs countless times, every day for a lifetime, usually with the same vague sense of regret and longing.

[noeleena]

Hi.

Kate,

At conception there is no boy or girl, and the myth of all are female is totaly wrong and male s are not 50 % female another myth ,or females are 50 % male its not the case ,

The program is set at conception what the baby will be unless there are details that are mismatched as i am intersexed , at conception .

You see i was not a female then change into a male then change to intersex it does not work like that fact is my conception program was then what i would be not min,s or hours or days or weeks later, or years for that matter . get rid of the dam myths and youll see what really does take place , at conception i was intersexed, thats it,


The myth was taken as what they thought was going on years ago the xrays did not show at those times the whole of the baby and what they thought they saw was as youv stated, is not correct,
the info and detail of scaners shows a very different photo of what takes place at conception through is really interesting if ones mind is open to fact .......

And how would they know any way what the baby was , fact, they did not know they quessed, and got it very very wrong.....

oh well what do i know ...im the misfit here or mismatched one,....


...noeleena,,,

[mechamoose]

I'd say that most males don't. There is too much emphasis on being 'strong' and 'tough' which are fed to our kids growing up.

What they seem to miss is that being nurturing also requires strength. You can't give if you don't have it.

Being a CD/TS person inherently means that you are willing to shun those 'norms' in favor of being your inner self. So what if your genotype has nothing to do with your identity? Wear it, own it, live it!

- MM

[kimdl93]

...................no

[mariehart]

A lot of men will take the opportunity to dress up as a woman if the context allows it. That doesn't make them crossdressers. I worked in an office for years and at Halloween once, a fancy dress basketball tournament was organised. We were talking about costumes to wear and I had no intention of dressing in women's clothes. But one guy said his Mother was involved in amateur dramatics and had a collection of French maid's costumes. I said no way but I was alone in that and all the guys were super enthusiastic about it and when I continued my objections it almost became a case that I wasn't man enough to dress as a woman! So I agreed eventually and in fact was sent out to the shop to buy six pairs of panti hose.

It was a fun night and I received a lot of compliments about my legs. In the photos all the guys looked like men in dresses except me. I overheard a comment to that effect from one of the guys.

Anyway I doubt if any of them ever crossdressed again. But they enjoyed the experience for what it was, a bit of harmless fun.

It's a pity crossdressing isn't always seen that way.

[Emi_]

This is like the assertion by the gay community that all men are homosexual. It would be so much easier if we weren't the unusual ones, wouldn't it? Then we could look down our noses at everybody else instead of having to stand up for ourselves all the time. Ah, to hold authority and privilege over the others - how sweet the taste of blood.

[Krististeph]

This is a hard issue to measure accurately, since many people actively deny their own true feelings, either our of habit or societal conditioning. If we accept as given that up to 10% of men may have homosexual desires, how many would you expect to admit this? All 10%? Even in our highly liberated society, i doubt that half would even admit to it, even in a fully blind and anonymous survey. The problem with surveys- some people refuse to tell the truth for a number of reasons, even out of sheer obstinance (to which Robert Heinlein and Samuel Clemens would applaud), so we'll never know for sure. But I am guessin we could narrow it down to an error ration of 1:2 to 1:5 at worst.

One blowhard I worked with a few years ago (heavy conservative, with all the trimmings, and rather hypocritical to boot- 3 marriages even though that was ostensibly against his church's beliefs, etc) tells the tale of a weekend spent crossdressed. Now this guy would be the first to decry any attempt at his kid's (public) school to present cd/tg/ts as being 'normal' for some people, so for me, this guy (and his story) represents a bit of overcompensation for being too straight-laced, so I discount this kind of one-off event.

So to answer the question "how many men (or people) actually have crossdressed at least once in their lives- heck, i'd bet money on way more than 10%: I would think (for the previous and other reasons too lengthly for me to spend time typing in now) between 30% and 50% of men (limited to within what I'll call our 'Western Society'). Now, how many have true and regular feeling of transvestitism and/or transsexuality? Again, my highly unscientific gut estimate would be between 0.5% to 2.0%.

Let me also limit the 0.5-2.0% to not include men who simply like looking at women dressed nice or in sexy outfits. IMO- a (or girl) guy can pick up his lover's shucked off sexy dress (or shirt & pants) and look at it fondly without any true cd/ts feelings. Even holding it up to their body to see what it would look like, or even just trying the clothes on. But this is not the same as wanting to look good in the dress- at that point, it is the female association of the dress (or male association of shirt and pants for the F to M cd) that is attractive- that is to say the desire is to adopt or adapt a measure of the opposite sex.

Clothing fetisishism of the opposite sex kind of straddles the line in my definieitons of the true CD/TS and that of the 30-50% of men who have tried on a female piece of clothing at some time- I'd wager 5%-20% of men have a significant fetish for a particular item of female clothing, without the full desire to wear and live in such.

That's my 2 cent's worth, with about 97% confidence... :-)

(I am not a crossdresser, I am very happy when I put on a bra, breastforms, pantyhose, and slip into a nice Kensie dress for the day or evening.)

[PaulaQ]

Projection: taking our own internal attitudes and beliefs and ascribing them as the motives of others, assuming that others must feel as we do.

[Katey888]

I'm a big one for grey (especially when it's a cashmere top... ;)) but in this case I find myself aligned with Jennifer's absolutist 'no'.

It would be crazy if we all had exactly the same urge... in fact I suspect it would be an extremely dystopian world (more along the lines of Vonnegut and Orwell than Heinlein, Krististeph.. :))

We are unusual, relatively rare, and distinctly weird to the world of muggles... and I think Tinks has it right where the fetish CDers outnumber the GD/TG types by an order of magnitude or two...

On the one hand it can be nice to be exceptional, but on the other it can mean being an irrelevant minority... Oh well, que sera, sera...

Katey x

[Ressie]

Clothing fetisishism of the opposite sex kind of straddles the line in my definieitons of the true CD/TS and that of the 30-50% of men who have tried on a female piece of clothing at some time- I'd wager 5%-20% of men have a significant fetish for a particular item of female clothing, without the full desire to wear and live in such.

I think a lot of boys have used lingerie or undergarments as an aid to masturbation, but never became CDs. Of course there's no proof. This is only conjecture based on evidence I've found personally.

[Confucius]

Are all men cross-dressers, deep down???
NO! NO! Absolutely Not!

Think about it. If even half of the male population really enjoyed cross-dressing but hid this fact from themselves, then:
1. Society would not assume that any man who cross-dresses must be at least partly gay,
2. Society would not be my completely mystified about why we cross-dress.
3. Society would be a whole lot more accepting of cross-dressing in public.
4. The U.S. Supreme Court would not have rejected Sheriff Joe Arapalo appeal which would allow him to make prisoners wear pink underwear.
5. Making prisoners in Abu Ghraib wear women's underwear would not have been considered as torture.

We really are different. Our brain circuits seem to cross in such a way that our brain interprets cross-dressing as actual contact with a female. Our brain releases a host of neurotransmitters (dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and others) which produce the sensations of well-being, comfort, pleasure, sexual gratification and bonding.

I once told a friend that I cross-dress because of the wonderful sensations I feel from it. Later he told me that I made him think that if he cross-dressed then he would feel good sensations too. Well, he tried it, and he felt nothing, nothing but a fear of getting caught. To this day he believes that the sensations I feel are all a result of my imagination.

[NicoleScott]

I think for every crossdresser, there are many more men who think about it, but can't bring themselves to do it.

I agree, MelanieAnne. Long ago, when I chatted in crossdresser chat rooms on AOL, I talked to many guys who had an intense interest in crossdressers and crossdressing. I would ask "have you ever crossdressed?". "Oh no, I just can't", for a number of reasons especially getting caught and labeled forever as queer. I think that there is a huge interest matched by huge insecurity.
As I posted in response to another thread, I think it takes both the desire to crossdress and the act of regularly putting on the clothes to be a crossdresser.
You are a crossdresser or you aren't. For those of us who aren't so wound up in our insecurities about it, we eventually took the plunge and tried something on as we were compelled to do. When we liked it, we were hooked, and might as well have admitted to ourselves right then that we are crossdressers. It's never that simple, and sometimes it took years or decades to come to terms with it.
As for avoiding the women's department, I don't think it's about being a crossdresser or not, but rather the fear of being seen there by people you know and having them think you like women's clothes. Even as a CDer, I hated it when my wife asked me to hold her purse and then disappear into the dressing room.
I think the percentage of men who are CDers is small, maybe 5% give or take a couple of points either way. Even if the percentage is small, that still makes the numbers very large.

[Sallee]

It happens every year here. where some of the seniors crossdress for a show. Always very funny but someof them look pretty good and maybe???

[Isabella Ross]

I can't help but think that all of us, G male and female, have both female and male attributes to some varying degree. So I think far more men would love to wear a dress and probably would in a highly accepting and open society (something that we just don't have at this point, I'm afraid to say). I think perhaps the 10 percent figure that you often see touted might even be a little on the light side. Jenniferathome, I can assure you that this is not my attempt at normalizing my TGism. Ever been to a vacation spot that's so good that you don't want to tell anyone about in case it gets overcrowded? That's the way I feel about my TG space!

[UNDERDRESSER]

How many different types of crossdressing have you read about from members here? Any non-declared or discovered CDers out in the wide world are going to have at least that many subtypes. It's impossible to put a number on it.

Think about it. If even half of the male population really enjoyed cross-dressing but hid this fact from themselves, then:
1. Society would not assume that any man who cross-dresses must be at least partly gay,This made me laugh out loud. Again, how many on here have written about their early days, and how they wondered if they were gay? How many men found these strange thoughts in their head, and thought , "That's too gay, better bury that thought DEEP." When they come across a CDer later, the programming to consider them gay is already there, but buried under such layers of guilt and self loathing, it is incredibly difficult for them to view it objectively.



We really are different. Our brain circuits seem to cross in such a way that our brain interprets cross-dressing as actual contact with a female. Our brain releases a host of neurotransmitters (dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and others) which produce the sensations of well-being, comfort, pleasure, sexual gratification and bonding.
While I'm sure there are some on these boards that have that aspect in play to some greater or lesser degree, I do not think that it's a generalization that can be accurately attributed to all, and is certainly not the only, or even the largest factor in play for all of us.

For the purposes of this discussion, let us take the definition of CDing to be a man who has a desire to present as fully female visual persona as possible. Then I would think that the % would be something like 0.5- 5%, depending on exactly how specific you want to be with your description. Way less than that will admit it, even to themselves. If you're going to include guys who would get some kind of thrill or fun out of it, if they could do it without any kind of negative reaction from those around them? That number would go much higher. 50%? More?

You will never get an accurate number, without a fully effective truth serum, administered by a clinical psychologist and a full therapy session for everyone. Of course, if you could do that, I think the world might be a better place.

[Natalie_393]

I like all the different responses to this subject I just want everybody to know I'm not trying to fit a square peg into a circle to find answers but rather to gain insight from different cross dressers

[Kimkandy]

I would say no most men don't ... I'm not sure why I do. Just bought new pair of knee length boots online. I have gone dressed to movies and clubbing.

[bimini1]

Well, I don't think we all are but I do believe there's a helluva lot more than a lot of people think. Just look at the members list of this forum. Thousands of men on here. And probably hundreds of thousands not on this forum.

[Michelle789]

I don't think that all, or even most men, are crossdressers. I think CDers are in the small minority, probably less than 10% of the population at most, and probably even less than that. I do think there are men who are CDers in denial, and some CDers are TS in denial. Most CDers aren't TS in denial, and most men aren't CDers in denial.

[Judith96a]

How many boys experiment with girls clothes in their teens - dunno, probably loads!
How many guys will dress up in female clothing for Halloween / for a dare / for a joke / for any of the thousands of mad reasons that guys do 'stuff'? dunno but it's probably more than you would imagine!
How relevant is any of this to the proposition that all men are crossdressers deep down? - not one little bit. Because, to paraphrase Dr Leonard McCoy, "it's crossdressing Jim but not as we know it". It's just curiosity or typical male tomfoolery!
Most of the time a cigar is just that - a cigar (except on those very rare occasions when it's something else entirely).

So I'm in the "hell, No" camp. While none of us is as unique as we might once have imagined or feared we are still a small and 'different' minority.

[Anna H]

Probably if they made DeWalt stilettos...more would be.

lol!

[JenniferR771]

Lie detector--then would we know the truth! Good point, Underdresser. Imagine if we could administer truth serum or a polygraph test to 1000 typical men.
What would you ask?
Are you a crossdresser?
Have you ever worn a dress? high heels? Bra? How many times? When was the last time? Do you own any women's clothes? Makeup? Have you ever?
Are you excited by the idea? Do you read stories or discussions of crossdressing?
Are you more man or woman mentally?

[Toronto Kristen]

I have to say that not all men are crossdressers deep down; only the best are.

[MelanieAnne]

If you are a cross dresser, you will cross dress. If you are a "normal" guy, you won't. They have no interest.

Are you saying we are not normal? I represent that. Sniff :eek:

[Babbs]

Scientific fact: for the first 6 weeks of life, all embryos are female. for half of them the y chromosome then kicks in. Men truly are just genetically modified woman.... what doe this mean? In our beginnings and deep down we are all females.

[Wildaboutheels]

Are all sharks maneaters?

Are all women golddiggers?

Are all babies cute?

Are all CDers trying to pass as female?

Maybe you could at least explain at what point or what age males become men?

I suspect that with only 72 posts in five years that you are not even aware that very few here will/can even agree on just WHAT makes someone a CDer?

Reasonable extrapolations ARE possible by open minded people based on well known, indisputable FACTS that can be found in hundreds of books and not pulled off the web.

[Babbs]

Wildeaboutheels: I pulled my little scientific fact from a book I'm currently reading, called Saxons, Vikings and Celts on pages 98 to 100, written by a well respected geneticist. His words, not mine. It was my silly little extrapolation at the end of my post, said with tongue firmly implanted in cheek...lol

[im-sparkles]

No. All men have a fem side to an extent but not all want to be a woman or dress like one. Some men never even connect to their fem side which is very unhealthy in my opinion. I for one am very in touch with my inner gurl !!

[heatherdress]

I never crossdressed and never had the urge to crossdress, well into adulthood. I enjoyed being a man, a man's man, and I liked dressing as a man, looking like a man, working like a man. I dressed the way I was taught a man should dress. Then one day, I acted upon a ridiculous suggestion to try something which I considered un-manly - ridiculous, weird, out-of-bounds. I was offered the challenge, opportunity and freedom without judgment to try on a pair of high heels, which I reluctantly did. I discovered pleasure, excitement, freedom, growth. This led to the discoveries that I enjoyed crossdressing, that I was beautiful and felt beautiful crossdressed, that this was OK and normal for me to do. I became a crossdresser.

The initial question, "Are all men crossdressers deep down?", is much deeper than "Do all men crossdress or want to crossdress?" The answer to the first question is probably "No", even though we will never know. But we don't know about the answer to the second question. Perhaps it is "Maybe."

We have significant barriers which prevent self exploration and discovery. We are taught how we should dress and what is appropriate for boys and men - toys, sports, emotions, behavior, careers. We suppress our feelings and dreams because of what we were taught, and because of the opinions of those around us - family, friends, employers, neighbors, strangers who see us. Religion, employment, culture - all influence how we dress and how we should think and feel about how we dress. Look at how many of us who crossdress consider our own crossdressing, and desire to crossdress, as weird, unhealthy, wrong. Even the broad spectrum of behaviors encompassed within the general term of crossdressing is impacted by our barriers.

I do believe that so many more people, both male and female, would engage in crossdressing behaviors and activities, if they felt free to do so. Perhaps most would. Experimentation, curiosity, sex, adventure, pleasure, self-actualization, fun, change - there are many motivators which could influence one to crossdress, at least to some degree. If it offers pleasure or satisfaction, they would continue to crossdress - as we do.

I would not suggest that most men are crossdressers "deep down inside, but I strongly believe that most have worn, tried on or would like to have tried on some elements of female attire/make-up/jewelry/hair style. Most would also never admit it. Many would find some degree of enjoyment, escape, enlightenment, pleasure, self-growth, acknowledgement, or understanding if they tried to crossdress to some degree appropriate to themselves - but only if they could.

I accept estimates that 5% of men crossdress as women. If you think about it, that is a high number.
I believe many, many more have tried crossdressing to some degree. Probably more than 50% have tried panties, stockings, lipstick, etc.
I also believe that the many men who have not crossdressed have thought about crossdressing to some degree or might do so if they had the freedom and opportunity to do so.

[charlenesomeone]

Most studies suggest only 3 to 8 percent of the population is identified as gay. I see many more of them than us girls.
How many think about cross dressing but never act on it, not as many as you think. To dress consistently very low.
Char

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Natalie, Only when the Government makes all Crossdressers register will we know the actual number on men that areCrossdressers.

[Virgin1A]

It's the definition of crossdressing that's at issue here as some of you have alluded to. As I understand it, male sexuality has a strong element of the fetishistic as "normal" and I'm reasonably certain that this is part of the reason that I like to dress. By this logic there is a huge pool of potential CDs in the general population. I don't seek validation in numbers. I became comfortable with myself long, long ago. I envision a continuum from the most masculine (scary creatures) to the most feminine (divine creatures) with genetic sex overlapping somehow. I couldn't pass in a total solar eclipse so in normal life I (am forced to) present as a male. If I looked like Andrej Prejic, I reckon I might slide along the scale a little. My point is that circumstances beyond our control play a big part in who we are. We should all try to be comfortable with ourselves and tolerant of each other. Treasure diversity.:battingeyelashes:

[Nadya]

I don't think all men are but I do wonder if people I meet day to day are secretly crossdressers and don't share it with others. There should be a secret handshake or signal that they are in good company. Haha.

[NicoleScott]

Hi Natalie, Only when the Government makes all Crossdressers register will we know the actual number on men that areCrossdressers.

Oh boy! That should be fun trying to log into crossdressers.gov

[Ricki Dove]

I believe only a few men have those feelings. I am very thankful that I am one of the very few! It feels so good!

[Teresa]

Natalie like most say it's about 10%, without social restrictions it could probably go higher but what the actual figure is of continuous dressing rather than the odd try out I don't know !

I now look at it more in these terms that when you get a group of guys together at least one other is hoping they don't see his bra straps or his panty line, we are far from alone with dressing !