Is big belly the biggest obstacle for most male cross dressers?

[kenny1999]

We all know men and women have very different body shape and structure by nature. I think most real cross dressers want to have a body like woman but it's quite hard to have breasts and hips like woman. This is something we can't control because it's unlikely to only build fat to hips and breasts. If you ask me, I am a fat guy with big breasts and hips. I could be a sexy girl if I don't have the fat waists. I have been doing exercises and eating less for months and seeing the results. I don't have any real diet plan but my only strategy is to eat less. My only motivation is to think to be a woman and hate my fat belly. But I think I can't only lose belly fat without losing fats on breasts. Somebody said I've already got very nice hand because my upper arm is very small. (only 28cm round size). I think it's hard to have my legs reduced because even if I don't workout with my arms, I have to walk a lot every day so it's really hard to have my thigh size reduced, isn't it? So, to be more 'proportional' throughout my body, I should workout for bigger arm, (should I?)

As for hips and breasts, I can use those silicone fakes, but I don't think it's healthy to compress my fat belly with corsets and this cannot last long.

So, Is big belly the biggest obstacles for most male cross dressers?

[Laura Collette]

Yes, it is for me -- discounting my wife's discomfort with possibly having to answer friends' questions about my alter ego if I were to be more public. I'm only 10 to 15 pounds over my ideal weight at 5'9" and 178 lbs, but most of the extra is in my belly. I like food too much to develop a feminine waistline. So as Popeye says "I yam what I yam and that's all that I yam." I wish I could look like an attractive woman but that's what my imagination is for.

[Jonithan]

I look pregnant. But that maybe a plus to all this. If I remember right, when my wife was pregnant, she didn't move very lady like. Perhaps I should be shopping at Modern Maternity.

joni

[Melissa_59]

Not so much anymore, but it's because I've dumped about 55 pounds since last September. I'll give you a hint: cut out the simple carbs and sugar, increase your fat intake (70% fat & 30% protein or thereabouts) and the weight will fall off of you for awhile, and then taper off to 1 to 1.5 pounds a week weight loss. It's called the Keto diet, and it requires no exercise (although exercise is good, you'll lose faster but it's not "required") and you really don't have to give up much except for prepackaged junk foods that are bad for you anyway.

Go to Youtube and look up Gary Taubes' ("Why We Get Fat") lecture at Ohio State Medical, and then Dr. Robert Lustig's lecture at UCal San Francisco called "Sugar: The Bitter Truth" to get an idea of what is going on in your body. This has seriously turned my life around because a lot of the medical problems I was suffering from all vanished about a month into this diet, and I haven't felt this good since I was in my mid-20s. Inbox me if you want more resources on Keto - they're all easily accessible on the web, lots of recipes and information sites.

~Melissa in West Texas

[bridget thronton]

Many women my age have belly fat too. So I am working on my weight for health reasons, not just appearence.

[Ashley Wray]

Hello Kenny,

For me it is the only thing at this point that I need to reduce. I can only speak from my own experience going forward here.

I have a diet that I heard on the radio one day driving to work. I hit the scale that morning and was 263 and I said something has to change here. The start of a diet I heard on the radio was if you cut out bread, rice, pasta, potatoes, soda that you will lose weight. I started and it started working like 5 lbs a week for the first few and then about 2 lbs a week after that. I hear this works better for guys than woman. I did some research and found that if you keep your carbs under 100 a day that you will lose roughly 2 lbs a week. It's tough cause really you can only eat Meat like Pork , Chicken, Beef and most fish then I always eat with a green veggie fresh is better cause some of the processing adds sugar which relate to carbs. Also cheeses if they are unprocessed are low in carbs and cottage cheese isn't too bad. It makes you get creative I started going to the store and cheking all the labels before I buy and adding up how many carbs per serving and how many servings in the container so that I could monitor the intake. Also there is alot of carb info online for restaraunts, I usually would order the meat and veggies and for the other side would just have them double up on the veggies.

You will start dropping fairly quick and don't have to starve cause you can eat all of the meat and veggies you want almost. If you do eat bread rice potatoes or pasta then eat the wheat or brown ones these have fiber and are called complex carbs that do not process straight to fat but watch your amount of intake a day. Your body still needs carbs but eat the healthier ones. For potatoes I eat sweet potatoes if I'm going to have them. The biggest killer I had was soda if you look at the carbs in one can it is a whole days worth on this diet cause of the sugar. I drink water, powerade zeros, diet cokes or sprite zeros once in awhile when I want a soda and if I have any beer it the low carb ones. Once you get where your going and start making progress you can pick a day of the week to eat whatever you want and then kick your diet back in the rest of the week.

I can again only suggest what has worked for me and also a coworker of mine that started when he saw what I was doing and he lost more weight than he thought was possible. Yes you will lose in your legs but your excercise walking all the time should also build more muscle and tone it up.

Im sure people have there pro's and con's of this diet but I only suggest as it works for me and you say you do not have a plan. Just eating less is effective to a point but it's more about controlling whats going in and how your body processes it. So you will feel much better with a plan that works for you :)

by the way I was 263 a year ago and now im at 203 trying to get to 195 or 190 but to keep with the point of this and your thread the only thing i need to decrease is the belly as I am fine everywhere else I might need to add an excercise in here at this point. I was a size 42 when I started and now wear a 34 it also did not take me a year to lose that but I have went off an on the diet over time. I'd say I lost 55 lbs in 6 months. Also keep in mind everyone is different and their body's will process different but you will see results :)

Just my 2 cents :)

Yes pretty much the same thing as Melissa said summed up cut out the SIMPLE carbs! Sounds like we made similar progress at 55 lbs each. I'm pushing hard right now to be down 70 lbs but it flattens out to a point and I gotta find a way to kick start it again!

[Tracii G]

I think we all feel that way but when I had a big belly it didn't stop me from dressing and going out in public.
Pick the right clothes for you body type and have fun.

[Jenniferathome]

worry about your health first and not where you'd like to "keep" fat. Too much fat is bad for anyone. Rather than concentrate on weight, the real metric is body fat %. "Moobs" are a bad thing and directly correlated to heart health issues. Lose the fat and be healthy.

[Emi_]

I have a belly. It is only an obstacle to sitting comfortably in the booths at some restaurants.

[Vickie_CDTV]

Plenty of "real women" have big bellies. They are not any less a woman than a woman with a really tiny waist.


My only motivation is to think to be a woman and hate my fat belly.
That is not thinking like a woman, it is thinking like someone who will develop an eating disorder. If you think trying to lose some weight is hard, try recovering from an eating disorder. If you want to lose weight, do it the right way, spending time and energy hating your body is not going to help.

If you make yourself proportional, being large is not an obstacle to passing as a woman (use proportionally large breast forms and rear padding.) The biggest obstacle is hiding a bread shadow, if one is affected by that.

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

(Big sigh!) I have a big belly too. I'm 6'-2" and 210# and it has all settled in my stomach. I wish I could move it around. I suppose exercise and walking would help. I don't eat that much. Today I'm spending the day wearing a maxi dress and really look like I'm ready to deliver a baby anytime. (I actually loved the look below my breasts! It was like an affirmation of my feminity.) But I had to change and go and mail a letter. I kept my bra and forms on and slapped on a T-shirt. My D forms hardly showed compared to my belly. What a dilemma! But a nice one in some ways!

Cheryl

[Melissa_59]

...gotta find a way to kick start it again!

The Keto "fat fast" usually kicks me over a plateau. It's where you spend a day or two doing as close to 100% fat intake as possible. I usually use cream cheese and my "fat bombs" that I make. Coconut oil is key, the MCTs in them keep hunger away. I usually wait about two weeks or so to make sure my weight loss has really plateaued, and then I break though it with the fat-fast.

Even if it wasn't for the amazing weight loss, I'd stay with this diet anyway. The fact that I no longer battle insomnia or many other medical issues is enough to keep me on it. I fought insomnia for over 20 years, most nights not even getting 2 hours sleep. About a month after starting Keto I started sleeping all the way through the night (except for my 3:30AM wake up to go to the bathroom). I fall asleep easier, wake up feeling better. The health benefits alone of this diet are amazing.


~Melissa in West Texas

[Julie Denier]

I've lost quite a bit of weight over the last couple of years through portion control and exercise, but it's a constant battle. I'm resigned to the fact that I'll always be "big," and a belly kinda goes along with it. I manage to create some semblance of a feminine figure with Spanx and Squeem, and strategic padding to balance things out top and bottom.

[Ashley Wray]

Thanks again Melissa, that's what I need cause im at the 2 week mark now and haven't lost another pound. But I did drop 60 pounds all together now so I will try that out so I can pull off the last 10 or 15 :)

[Karen kc]

yup, my biggest complaint is my stomach!! I need a lil more butt and hips, my legs are good to go!

[CynthiaD]

Yes, the big belly is a pain. I look OK from the front (to me at least :)) but when I turn to the side ... oops! So I don't turn to the side in front of the mirror. :) I'm working on it though.

[NicoleScott]

Others have discussed the weight loss thing, both for better looks and for better health, but it still remains that we are guys and most of us have features that are an obstacle to achieving the perfect feminine look. So we do what we can, and live with the rest of it. What I try to do is focus on the things that make me look and feel feminine instead of the things that don't. In particular, the clothes, the wigs, the makeup, the pantyhose, shoes, jewelery, painted nails, etc. I have learned to see what I like to see and what drives me to crossdress in the first place.

[cupcake]

I find my bigger problem to be shoulders more than anything else. Stupid swimming. Anyway I got my weight down to 198 lbs at six foot two. All I really do is portion control and cardio. The portion control is the hardest part though. Still working on that last 12 lbs or so

[charlenesomeone]

Any motivation to get healthy is good. As other girls have said
we girls have bodies that store things differently. But there are a lot
of different shaped GG's out there.
Char

[Zylia]

I'd say facial features are the biggest obstacle, because those are hard to change with a healthy diet and lifestyle.

[JillyJones]

Hmmm I've got rather a belly but I'm on the case to reducing it. I think it's best to accentuate your best bits and cover your worst bits. A belt high on the waist and standing up straight can make a big difference to reducing the effect of the big belly IMO

[Claire Cook]

I look pregnant. But that maybe a plus to all this. If I remember right, when my wife was pregnant, she didn't move very lady like. Perhaps I should be shopping at Modern Maternity.
joni

HA HA! I've been told the same thing. So do any of us with this problem wear maternity clothes? (But geez ... a pregnant 70-year old...???)

[kymmieLorain]

My belly is a hamper for me mostly in the sense that I cannot get the cloths I want. Some things are just not available in XL. My thing is fitness I need to get out an exercise. I think once I get to exercising the weight will come off.

Kymmie

[suchacutie]

I agree that a big belly is annoying, but that can be changed more easily than facial features or wide shoulders. Then there is that loss muscle mass as we age.

I'm part of weight loss group. I started at 215, now at 175, with10 pounds to go, all done with portion control.

[AKADonna]

I don' t allow my big belly to get in my way! If you look around closely, there are plenty of GG's out there who have a large belly (many never recover form child bearing) and who are able to disguise their belly with the proper dress. Most wear clothes without belts or sashes around the waist and which drape from their boobs down. I went to a thrift store recently to buy several outfits that I thought would achieve this end and was quite successful. At 70 yrs old, I dress to blend in with other women my age and it's not unusual to see them in peasant tops and blouses that don't tuck in to their skirt or slacks! THis works for me - while I, too, am attempting to lose weight around the middle. The weight goes away, alright, but not around my waist!

Another thing I happened on while at the thrift store was the wonders of a nice maternity skirt! They have an elastic portion that covers your gut and the part below the waist looks like any other skirt. This gives me the feeling of having some control around my belly while still appearing ladylike! Try it and you will love it!

[marsha leanne]

i too have a huge middle. It came from too many trips through the drive in while driving to different jobs. 10 years later and i have a nice source of frustration when trying to fit into my clothes. Does it stop me from dressing? not one single bit! I just cant fit into some of my nicer outfits right now.

I will look onto the regimines listed above. 60-80- pounds lighter would be great!

[Stephanie47]

Men and women carry their fat in different ways. Women tend to have a pear look. I'm not talking about those who are morbidly obese- just plump. I see many plump plus size women who are tastefully attired. Guys? Men tend to carry fat at the belly, which is dangerous because the fat actually surrounds and encases many of the organs. I see too many guys of all ages who look like they are pregnant with a basketball. I would suggest a diet and exercise plan that will eliminate the excess weight, i.e., fat, from all parts of your body. Being fat in selective areas of the body? I'd rather use breast forms and have a healthy BMI.

[Michelle colson]

It was for me before I lost weight. Now it's my broad shoulders vexing me. I've lost 45 pounds in the last 18 months. Went from 5-11 215 to 170 by diet and lots of cardio. I still have a small belly to work on but with a corset I'm able to pull it in and have a nice little feminine curve. Now I just need some good hip pads to even out my shape and de emphasize my shoulders. I also went from a size 16 to size 10! Gotta love that.

[darinyc]

There are so many ways around this...other than wearing a waist cinched (which I have done in the past). I highly recommend doing a cleanse for a month. Just juicing and smoothies, raw fruits and vegetables. I know it may be tough, but it helped me get much slimmer and now I don't have to deal with that bulge that plagued me for so long. And then continue it 4x a year...plus you'll feel great inside too :)

[Toshi]

I have worn a corset for some time. It helps hide a belly, but also for eating not so much, so a lot of weight loss.

[celeste26]

Well my huge belly will disappear nearly in one day with some magic from my plastic surgeon. As soon as I get up the big fat wad of cash needed.

[Miss Interpretation]

Corsets can tuck the belly. For me, the most difficult things for me to hide are my broad shoulders and chin!

[JoannaCD]

Being 6-4 is a bigger problem than having some excess weight. And I have a heel fetish. So the best I can do going out is a polo, Amanda jeans and SoftWalk clogs. Don't get me wrong,I find that very satisfying.

[LelaK]

Low-carb [sugar, flour, etc] (and high natural fat) diet makes it pretty easy to get or stay trim. See mercola.com for a lot of good articles on that. Diet has much more influence than exercise.

[lorisdream]

I also used the low-carb diet they call South Beach. Since Jan, I went from 225 to 170 today. I really don't even diet today, but I always keep my carb intake low. I sure don't want to gain this weight back. Lots of my older dresses are now way too large for me. Funny I tossed out all of my men's size 38 pants and shorts, but I won't part with my larger size dresses.

[Crista]

I gain weight just looking at food.
My love for wearing dresses with a 4 inch wide belt is all the motivation I need for eating healthy, though.

[Amanda1128]

I have a beer belly, but just as difficult is the facial and body hair. My SO would not be happy if I shaved my body hair. Especially my chest hair. I do enjoy it when she runs her fingers through when we watch tv together.

[Amanda1128]

Has anyone tried waist traing with a waist cincher or girdle? I have been reading about it and it seems like a viable option. If I could take 6a inches of my belly that would be good both in and out of dress. Just looking for opinions or anyone who has experience with this.

[shelly1]

I also have a big belly but the hardest thing to hide is my broad shoulders. its hard to find clothes that fit right and look good

[naneomi]

I have a bit of a belly that I have been fighting with during the summer. Diet, jogging and Spanx are my allies in that fight. Now if I could just do something about my calves...