How Photos Change

[LeaP]

Functionally, that is.

I recently posted a new avatar photo. I haven't used one for perhaps a year or two now. It prompted a number of PMs. One exchange made me realize that I'm viewing photos somewhat differently.

My avatar was prompted by another member's comment to the effect that yet another member never posts photos of themselves. What the latter does is neither here nor there, but the comment stuck in my mind for some reason, so when I recently purchased a few new things, I snapped a quick photo for uploading.

When the PMs started, I realized that somewhere along the line I had stopped examining photos "looking for the guy" ... at least with my friends. Instead, I was looking at them no differently than any friend or family pictures. Theresa's protest pictures are an example, those of her and Simone visiting Misty are another. They were just interesting pictures and an event update. That I hadn't viewed them in terms of where Theresa's appearance started or how much it had changed only became apparent in our PM exchange, which brought to mind her own, older avatar. THAT evoked the thoughts of change.

It's a minor illustration, but it does indicate an important shift in my thinking. Which is that I'm past one of the bases of my own transphobia, which is the lingering disbelief in the reality of the transsexual condition. It's a sign of normalcy.

[Tammy Lynn Tx]

I have tried uploading photos a few times and can never get them to compress to the necessary size, So until i can find a 10 year old that can teach an old "troglodyte" how to do so..... (that is what my neighbors son calls me because I still have/ use a flip phone)

[Rachel Smith]

Hi Lea it is so nice to finally see you. You look wonderful BTW.

[LeaP]

Thank you, Rachel. What I see in my OWN picture isn't so much the guy as my sister - the one I don't get along with. Mother Nature has a perverse sense of humor.

[Donna Joanne]

You are so lovely Lea. All I see is a beautiful self confident lady.My wife told me back in May that she thinks "I look so much like my mother". This has helped my self esteem more that anything anyone else has ever told me. My mother may have been called many things in her life, but I can guarantee you being a man was never one of them!

[Jorja]

Photos do not change. They will always be the same each and every time you look at them. What changes is the subject in the picture. And you have done it so well, Lea.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

That is what transition is all about..getting past "it"

[LeaP]

As is usual for many of us, I find it hard to accept the nice comments. I do see some real changes from my last pictures, which is encouraging.

Which brings me back to the closing concept of the OP. Despite some minor discomfort from the nice comments, that's more a factor of the life-long habit of self-deprecation and self-rejection than insisting myself on seeing the persistence of maleness in my appearance. Putting the bad habit aside, what I focus on now is what needs to be done. Forward instead of backward-looking, if that makes sense.

[Rachel Smith]

I know what you mean Lea I don't handle them well myself. I also understand the the sister thing but in a different way. You see my sister Judy thinks I look like my sister Susan and my sister Susan thinks I look like my sister Judy. Maybe neither one of them wants to admit they look like me, lol. It does make me feel like a sister though. My mother thinks I look like her mother, I am sure Nana is happy in heaven now, lol.

[becky77]

As is usual for many of us, I find it hard to accept the nice comments. I do see some real changes from my last pictures, which is encouraging.

Which brings me back to the closing concept of the OP. Despite some minor discomfort from the nice comments, that's more a factor of the life-long habit of self-deprecation and self-rejection than insisting myself on seeing the persistence of maleness in my appearance. Putting the bad habit aside, what I focus on now is what needs to be done. Forward instead of backward-looking, if that makes sense.

Blimey, did you steal my thought process!
I really can't take a compliment because I fail to see the basis of the compliment, so it is disregarded as telling me what I want to hear.

That aside it lovely to put a face to you :) You won't listen because I don't, but I only see a woman.

Ps, I had this genius identity idea, if you don't trust someones picture ask them to take one in a certain pose, like standing one legged as a teapot stance.
That'll route em out lol. If they manage to find said posed picture of the person they are faking, well they deserve full kudos for the deception!

[LeaP]

I really can't take a compliment because I fail to see the basis of the compliment, so it is disregarded as telling me what I want to hear.

That aside it lovely to put a face to you :) You won't listen because I don't ...

Exactly! Even worse, I feel compelled to respond with my rejection!


Ps, I had this genius identity idea, if you don't trust someones picture ask them to take one in a certain pose, like standing one legged as a teapot stance.
That'll route em out lol. If they manage to find said posed picture of the person they are faking, well they deserve full kudos for the deception!

Good idea ... except that cherry picking a good one with a predetermined pose is a tall order!!! And if you don't think I cherry picked, think again! I mean, I have SOME dignity ...

[becky77]

Good idea ... except that cherry picking a good one with a predetermined pose is a tall order!!! And if you don't think I cherry picked, think again! I mean, I have SOME dignity ...

Lol, who doesn't Cherry pick.

[Kathryn Martin]

Actually, people look so much better in real life. I am always amazed how weird my pictures look and how wonderful I look even in a mirror.....

[Jorja]

Kathryn, how many times do we have to tell you not to play with The Wicked Queen's mirror!:)

[PretzelGirl]

Wow Kathryn. I hope my good pictures will be as good as your bad ones some day.

[noeleena]

Hi.

Tammy .

What s a flip phone never had one gee and your old , he he ......

as for photos doubt youd see any change in myself over many years so i dont bother showing them , no pretty looking women to be seen any way,

...noeleena...

[Aprilrain]

I think everyone cherry picks the best photo, it's just that I don't need to take a thousand photos to get a decent one now. More like 10:battingeyelashes:

Lea, you look lovely and this picture is an improvement over the last (yes, I've been wasting time hanging out here long enough to remember Lea's old photo:heehee:)

[LeaP]

It's interesting to be exposed to the same picture of yourself so often. At first you see all the things you don't like, but you also eventually see things you don't see in the mirror.

The obvious one was my development. I really do not think I appear quite that large. There has to be something going on with the angle, lighting, etc. I have a little extra room in the bra, but nowhere near enough to account for that. Still, it is more than I thought in effect.

Arms and shoulders are still bigger than I thought.

I'm somewhat self-conscious about the male-typical size of my head ... but that's not particularly evident in the photo, to my surprise.

Face changes - they are there, but I'm at a loss to pin them down. It's subtle. I had one or two that might have been better in this respect, as this shot is taken from a low angle and makes me look a little imposing.

So, some surprises and some work to do still. All in all, not too bad at 59.

[Marleena]

It's a minor illustration, but it does indicate an important shift in my thinking. Which is that I'm past one of the bases of my own transphobia, which is the lingering disbelief in the reality of the transsexual condition. It's a sign of normalcy.

This statement struck home for me. Once I realized what my "condition" was and why I identified as female I began a quest for answers as to why? Still struggling a bit with it.

As far your avatar I see the changes for the better. I have to admit when I assumed I was a Cder (denial) I was far less concerned with male markers . It was fun to be out and about. Now I'm obsessed with getting rid of as many as male markers as possible because it got real.