Eringirl
09-05-2014, 08:47 PM
My apologies if this sounds somewhat self centered or egotistical, but...
Earlier today I was looking at the photo I currently use as my avatar, (which looks a bit better for some reason on my big *ss monitor ;) ) when I caught myself saying something out loud. "There's a person I would want to get to know better"
I have never, ever, ever, in my 55 years on this earth said that about any previous picture of my male self. Never. So, this evening, i took another look. What I saw, looking back at me was a person who was happy. Happy, and confident, and content. Someone who has something to contribute. This was me! The me that now includes Erin. For years, like others here, I battled with depression, and low self esteem. But I managed to still create a pretty good life. Wonderful wife, who, for some reason that to this day (30 years, this weekend) I still don't know why she married me, - and 2 outstanding kids, strong, independent women in their own right.
Now, I feel like I have arrived. I am home. Complete. I am no longer that grumpy, frustrated and sometimes angry person that my wife put up with these past few years. I didn't want to be that way anymore and I don't know how my wife did it. But, finally Erin broke through. It was like she was pounding on the door wanting to help, begging to help. And when I finally opened the door to let her in, help she did.
While I have only been here a short time, I cherish the help I have received, the laughs, and friends I have already made. We are sisters, one and all. Thank you.
That's it. That's all. My late evening musings.....
Good night to you all.
Hugs,
Erin
Earlier today I was looking at the photo I currently use as my avatar, (which looks a bit better for some reason on my big *ss monitor ;) ) when I caught myself saying something out loud. "There's a person I would want to get to know better"
I have never, ever, ever, in my 55 years on this earth said that about any previous picture of my male self. Never. So, this evening, i took another look. What I saw, looking back at me was a person who was happy. Happy, and confident, and content. Someone who has something to contribute. This was me! The me that now includes Erin. For years, like others here, I battled with depression, and low self esteem. But I managed to still create a pretty good life. Wonderful wife, who, for some reason that to this day (30 years, this weekend) I still don't know why she married me, - and 2 outstanding kids, strong, independent women in their own right.
Now, I feel like I have arrived. I am home. Complete. I am no longer that grumpy, frustrated and sometimes angry person that my wife put up with these past few years. I didn't want to be that way anymore and I don't know how my wife did it. But, finally Erin broke through. It was like she was pounding on the door wanting to help, begging to help. And when I finally opened the door to let her in, help she did.
While I have only been here a short time, I cherish the help I have received, the laughs, and friends I have already made. We are sisters, one and all. Thank you.
That's it. That's all. My late evening musings.....
Good night to you all.
Hugs,
Erin