just thinking

[julie marie1]

I haven't been on for a while. I only like to come on when I am fully dressed. Tonight I am wearing a nicely fitted black dress with a red wig. I am considering going out for a walk. Since it is raining, an umbrella would make me feel less conspicuous. I am going to have to drive several hundred miles in the near future and I am considering doing so enfemme. This would include a stay in a motel and breakfast in the morning and of course going thru toll booths. Since I will be dressed, I would like to do some shopping for dresses that fit. Does anyone know what reactions and problems I may encounter? This is in the U.S. by the way.

[bridget thronton]

I am usually left alone when I go to those venues.

[Marcelle]

Hi Julie Marie,

I live up North in Canada so I cannot speak to the US but I can provide a synopsis of my own experiences interjected from what I have read of others from your neck of the woods (USA). I have never had any issues with being out and about "en femme" and this includes shopping, staying at hotels, eating in restaurants. Now by no problems I mean nobody has been mean, overtly rude or aggressive. However, depending on how you present, you do have to prepare yourself to get "read" by those around you. For the most part that will be everything from a "double take stare" to giggles. I won't lie you do have to have a thick skin to go out among the Vanilla world so do be prepared for that. Pick you venues wisely, day time in a crowded mall you are less likely to get read because people are too busy with their own lives (again it depends on how you present). People are drawn to the out of place. So it might be wise to do a quick look around (en boy) of the venue you plan to visit and see what other GGs wear to help you blend in. For example going to a mall on the weekend in a evening wear type dress and heels when most GGs are dressed less formal will most likely draw attention to you ( :thinking: Hmm why is that woman wearing a cocktail dress in the mall). Same goes with make-up, tone it down if you can and try a more natural look. If your intent is to fly low under the radar then blending in is the easiest way to do this (i.e., you don't want to be noticed).

While most of us can blend in if you are planning to stay at a motel, eat at a restaurant and go shopping, that means interaction with others. This will bring you in close for scrutiny at which point the vast majority of us get read. Again, personally I have not had any issues but you do need to prepare yourself for an odd moment as the person processes . . . lady . . . nope man. In most cases this is not them being rude but them processing something they may not have encountered before. I always like to put it in perspective of "How often did I see a TG person in the real world up close" so it can be odd for the uninitiated.

This was not meant to scare you off your trip. If you are ready, you are ready and I say go for it and don't look back. Once you get out it will be the greatest feeling you can imagine, you just have to prepared for a few cloudy moments with the sunshine. Final recommendation, be safe. Don't think "guy" when you are dressed "girl" and decide to go for some midnight walks or down to a local watering hole alone. Stick to the day time, public places and crowded venues and most importantly . . . have fun. :)

Hugs

Isha

[SheriM]

Julie, I have traveled by car enfemme more than once. Toll booths are not a problem. Let them see you. Going to a gas station in the US is not a problem as they are all self serve and if there are too many manly type dudes around, you can duck into your car while filling up. For food, I usually go thru the drive thru or go to a mall and eat in the food court. Yes, I do walk around and shop in full female mode in the mall. I present as female in a knee length skirt (OK, a little above the knee) but if anyone looks, I am obviously a guy trying to be a woman. One thing I have not done is to check into a motel in full femme mode. Have always removed the wig and changed into femme pants or jeans first. Went into a Asian take out place once to get food (full enfemme) but have not gone to a sit down restaurant. Oh, for pit stops, I do stop at rest stops and go into the womens rest room but am very cautious. If there are kids around, I'll go on as I don't want to be confronted or scare a little girl or get in trouble with her Mom.

[Jorja]

"Just thinking", that is usually when I get into the most trouble.

Going out and about in the mainstream really depends on where you are located as to whether or not you will encounter problems. If you are in the bible belt then I would expect some problems. For the most part, you should have no problems. Sure there might one ahole that has a problem with you but then, there is one in every crowd. As mentioned, avoid kids. They can tell at 1000 yards and they are not afraid to say something. At most rest stops they have family restrooms. Use them to avoid problems there. Otherwise, be confident and act like you own the place. Go have fun.

[kimdl93]

Yes, I've traveled en femme on many occasions. For the most part, you'll get no reaction. Not at fuel stops, restaurants or hotels. I've had a few major incidents...mechanical in nature..actually a flat UHaul tire and a faulty distributor. I was en femme each time and treated just like any other woman with car trouble.