My, what an evening!

[Rachel Ann]

I am a pretty jaded person, but last night got to me emotionally. :o

It was the TGSF (Transgender San Francisco) Cotillion, an annual event. A bunch of us rented a couple of motel rooms and got makeovers to go with our formal outfits. There was a fun stage show, and California Assembly representative Mark Leno showed up to talk about some anti-discrimination initiatives that are working their way in to state law.

Part of the event is something called the “Debutante Walk”, in which the new girls can walk across the stage and (if they choose) wave to the crowd when their names are called. At first, I thought, “Well, this is kind of silly, but if everybody else is doing it, so will I".

But when I was standing in line, I noticed that some of the girls around me seemed to be out dressed en femme for the very first time. Some of them looked so nervous that I thought that they might faint. All of a sudden, it hit me how much effort had gone in to creating a welcoming, validating, safe environment for everyone, and I was overwhelmed. :) It actually brought tears to my eyes as I walked across the stage!

We all got a little scroll commemorating the occasion and an onstage hug from Miss TGSF 2005. Actually, it’s called the “Debutante and Guy Walk” - there were some FtMs there too. :) I will never forget the evening.

- Pictures to follow as soon as I overcome some tech glitches with my new camera. They aren't my best pictures ever, but I FELT beautiful and the memories are PERFECT!

Love

Rachel xxx

p.s. *sigh* now I have to take the polish off my fingernails which I grew long just for the occasion ...

[Amelie]

Wow, Rachel, I am so happy for you. You've had some tough times recently, you deserved a fun night on the town.

Love
Amelie
xxx

[AngGG]

Sounds like you had a great time Rachel! Thank you for sharing your story.:clap: :bs:

[Shelly Preston]

Hi Rachel

Glad you had a wonderful time,

If only it were as easy everywhere else.

I wish we were all able to participate in that event.

[Joanne08]

hi rachel,

glad you had a great time. Those emotions do mark significant moments.
Take care dear.


Love, Jo

[windycissy]

You go, girl! Aren'tcha gonna tell us about the gown you wore? How did you style your hair? Big jewelry too?

I hope you post those pictures! It sounds like a wonderful evening.

Windy

[Laurie Ann]

I am glad you had a wonderful evening and were able to have empathy for those out and dressed for the first time.

[Mona]

Rachel, it is really nice to hear of someone being overwhelmed by something that really has meaning! Thank you for sharing.
Hugs, Mona

[Staci]

It sounds like you had a great time. It's wonderful when those meaningful events hit you and you realize how lucky you are.

[Rachel Ann]

Thank you all for your sweet notes!

It was also a maturing experience. (Yes, even people my age can always use more maturity. :p) Being among so many people in the Trans community who hold important positions in The City was an important reminder that this isn’t just a game – it’s about who I really am, which continues to be a voyage of discovery and a work in progress.

There were also a number of friends and supporters from the LGBT community at large, such as SF Police Officer Lenny Broberg, a past “International Mister Leather” who traditionally MCs the event and is involved every year with putting on the Pride Parade. Past Pride Grand Marshal Donna Sachet was co-MC. If you want to run for public office around here and win, you don’t snub SF [LGBT] Pride!

The importance of unity was stressed again and again – across the Trans spectrum, as well as throughout the LGBT world. Sure, we have a few political infighters and backbiters like all groups, but they are mercifully few. We are way too marginalized to afford splintering, I think, and so apparently do most of my sister transwomen and brother transmen (as well as our non-T LGB and other friends)! :D

I am still struggling with my new camera. The driver doesn’t work and I am afraid that I may need additional hardware. :mad: But I will find a friend’s computer from which I can upload the pictures, which I will then post here. This may take all week as I am going out of town until Friday.

http://www.fortmason.org/features/2006/01/feature05.shtml?trans_sf.html

Rachel Ann xxx

[GypsyKaren]

Hi Rachel

I'm so glad you had a good time and such! I belong to a local tg support group, and for some of our members the monthly meeting is their only oppurtunity to be out dressed. I do it all the time now, and it's something I'll never take for granted.

GypsyKaren

[Rachel Ann]

You go, girl! Aren'tcha gonna tell us about the gown you wore? How did you style your hair? Big jewelry too?
Thank you for asking, Windy!

Well there were some last-minute wardrobe changes but I was happy with the result. I wore a black calf-length embroidered faux organza dress over a black full slip (the red chemise just didn't work). I even had a bit of decolletage. ;) Black velvet kitten heels, though I had to give up on getting the silver hearts to stay on at the vamp - maybe next time.

The wig I chose is very layered and flippy all the way down, with big bangs and lots of highlights. I had my own hair colored to match it so that the whole thing could be a little longer - not quite shoulder length, but long enough for an old lady. :) Naturally, I had a lot of external help with makeup and hair - God bless J'anel and Cara.

I wore a 5-strand (faux) pearl choker with a big blue stone in front. The rest of my jewelry was understated; square earrings with 4 pearls each within a silver filigree, a watch and a silver bracelet. My pride and joy was (were?) my own nails, which I grew out for the occasion, and had manicured and painted Chanel Midnight Red (aka "f*** me red" :cheeky:). The fingernails had to come off today :( but the pedicure remains.

Not my most stunning ensemble ever, and I wasn't the most gorgeous creature in my group, but I was very pleased with the result and felt very confident doing my "Deb Walk". :D



... it's something I'll never take for granted.
Amen to THAT!

Rachel xx

[Rachel Ann]

These are just AWFUL pictures of me. My outfit got frumped down at the last minute for technical reasons, my face is shiny, my age and masculinity show through and I forgot to take my glasses off for some of them. (Marlena, you are so right about oily skin.) No matter. As I said before, I felt beautiful (and loved) and my friends say that I didn’t stop smiling once all evening!

(On the other hand, my hair and nails were above reproach. :D)

Let’s start here …
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v81/NoodlesRomanoff/Tahoe004.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v81/NoodlesRomanoff/Tahoe002.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v81/NoodlesRomanoff/Tahoe003a.jpg
Well, you get the general idea …

[Rachel Ann]

Then, …
L-R: Angela, me, J’anel
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v81/NoodlesRomanoff/Tahoe010a.jpg
J’anel, whom I love to bits and pieces, did my makeup. Angela is young and drop-dead gorgeous (and Miss TG San Jose 2005). I would love to hate her, but she is a marvelous chum who never puts on airs and is great fun to go out with. The less said about the *ugh* boy glasses that I forgot to take off, the better.

Anastasia
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v81/NoodlesRomanoff/Tahoe015a.jpg

Me with Cara, Anastasia’s GG SO. Cara did my hair, bless her heart!
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v81/NoodlesRomanoff/Tahoe013a.jpg

Cindy and me. For my money, she was the belle of the ball!
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v81/NoodlesRomanoff/Tahoe012.jpg

Cindy (sans hair and gloves) and me again:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v81/NoodlesRomanoff/Tahoe029.jpg

(2 more pix in post #19 below)

[windycissy]

Rachel,

I think you look terrific, and your gal pals must be a hoot to hang with. Kudos on your demure hemline, you have terrific legs and they look better than ever....

Windy

[Kim E]

Hello Rachel ~
Thank you for sharing your wonderful evening and the pictures with us. Both you and your dress looked lovely. Glad you enjoyed your evening with all your supportive friends and newcomers alike. Sounds like a terrific event.

Kim

[racquel]

You look great Rachel,truly happy.

[Rachel Ann]

Awwww, thank you all! I am such a fortunate lass! *wipes away tear*

Here are a couple of more pix:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v81/NoodlesRomanoff/RachealAnn.jpg

and just clowning around ...
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v81/NoodlesRomanoff/Tahoe006a.jpg

I continue to be overwhelmed by how emotionally blindsided I was by all of it. :) When I saw my therapist on Friday, she brought me around to another aspect of it: As things like panties and painted toenails become more and more part of my everyday “skin” they are losing their resonance as sexual cues. This is making me feel much more authentic as a woman, and more self-confident and un-self-conscious in all matters. :D

Rachel xxx

[uknowhoo]

Oh Rachel Ann, I'm so happy to hear about your experience.

I can certainly understand how the Debutante Walk could take a girl's breath away.

I do have to take exception to your assessment of your photos though. I think you looked just lovely.

Hugs,

Tammi