Male Fail

[Aly Cat]

So my male mode is starting to not fool people. I had my children today and I took them to a recreation center to play pool and Foosball. As of right now, I'm not allowed to be in female attire with any form of makeup, wig, etc. I have to present as a guy.
Well, while getting all of us signed in, the front desk clerk said, "what's your name miss?" I didn't correct her, just simply said "Adam." She said "Oh! I'm sorry!" I just chucked enjoying it all. She leans over to the other clerk and goes, will you print "her"...HIM! a name tag please? I just laughed and smiled. As embarrassed as she may have been, I thought it was wonderful and never corrected her. I guess male mode is getting less and less convincing!

[Kris Avery]

Go Aly! I'm cheering for you:)

[JayeLefaye]

Bless your heart!!!!

Jaye

[charlenesomeone]

Ally,
Love your stories! You may need to write a book someday.
Big Hug
Char

[Katey888]

That says it all, Aly... :cool:

A lot of that will be your natural persona filtering through clothes and outward appearance - have to feel sorry for folk who can't quite make you out though... I'm sure you put them at ease.. :)

Katey x

[DaphneMiller]

I love reading your updates Aly. They're overwhelmingly positive, and I'm so happy for you. (Even though you make me a teeny bit jealous...) :)

Daphne

x

[Rhonda Darling]

Not "allowed" to be in female mode? I presume that's a rule imposed by the wife/SO/mother-of-your-children? At what point do you think that will change? One of these days you won't have any guy clothes to change into . . .

I think it must have been very affirming to have that mistake innocently made by the clerk.

Best,
Rhonda

[Marcelle]

Hi Aly,

Nothing wrong with a slip like that and it just confirms that the woman you are is present even when in guy mode.

Hugs

Isha

[Rogina B]

You are doing really well ! I sure hope you are making a huge effort toward acceptance from your young family.You haven't mentioned PFLAG or therapy that can ease your family into this...

[Eringirl]

:cheer: That is great Aly! Yet another affirmation that your transition is going well. Sounds like things are going to have to change with arrangement when you have your kids though ??

[CostaRicaRachel]

I love reading your updates. It gives me just a little bit of hope.

[MsVal]

Wow, what a wonderful story of affirmation.
We in the TG/TS community can easily see the woman in your photos, and provide a great deal of positive reinforcement. However sincere we may be, it pales in comparison to real world experiences such as you have described.

Aly, you are beautiful outside, and as others have noted, inside too.

From one of those who live the life vicariously: Thank you for sharing that moment.

[Beverley Sims]

I say it again Aly,
That's progress.

[PaulaQ]

@Aly - what happens when you get your name / gender marker changed? Can they still bar you from visiting as a woman? At a certain point in transition, trying to pass as a guy is increasingly difficult.

[Aly Cat]

Paula, at that point, I will have to start fighting for my rights. My kids have seen pictures of me as a woman, I have talked to them about how I feel inside, and what I am doing in regards to transitioning. I'm hoping and praying that when the time comes, I will have been involved in their lives enough that she won't completely try to have me removed. That's the hope at least. If needed, I will be reaching out to my local LGBT for assistance.

[PaulaQ]

Lambda Legal
Southern Regional Office

730 Peachtree Street, NE
Suite 1070
Atlanta, GA 30308-1210

t 404-897-1880
f 404-897-1884

[Sometimes Steffi]

I just love your posts. I wish you the best of luck.

Your profile says your not concerned about passing or not.

Just don't worry about it. In my book, you're already in the passing lane (double entendre intended).

[Aly Cat]

I'm realizing that all of this is so much bigger than passing or not. I mean, passing is nice, but not necessary. If I'm being true to myself, then what do I care what random strangers think? I know my pictures look ok in terms of me passing, but just remember... For every photo posted, 100+ more got deleted! The story of our lives!

Always be true to yourself.
Tuam sequere naturam

[Susie Mack]

Aly, you're absolutely amazing! Hang in there. :love:

[Rogina B]

Like Paula Q,I really think now is the time to lay the groundwork more formally with the kids as doing so will help you in your dealings with the ex,coming up. PFLAG could be great help in your situation.

[LesliePinky]

hahah lol nice stories xoxo

[SmoothLegs]

That's Quality Aly .. I love this..

[vicky_cd99_2]

You have got to love that. It is an awesome thin Aly. The Lady at the desk know who you are. No matter how you are dressed your aura comes across.

[Badwolf]

How old are your kids? There are plenty of times where the kids are also a primary part of the decision making process for the courts, and certain ages where it's pretty hard to stop the kids from interacting with a parent if they choose to.

I'd assume that when you change your sex on legal ID's you can probably take it to court assuming you have a strong case for being a supportive parent.