Maybe your entire family knows?

[Wildaboutheels]

"Only a few people know about me". If THAT is your story [or something similar] isn't it at least possible if not likely that MANY people know - you know..."through the grapevine" about you - but just do not give a Rat's behind? WHY on earth would they especially if you are merely a "part time" CDer?

For those that took the risk and told friends, acquaintances or relatives etc., [other than your spouse] how good was your "guessing" on who to tell? How many dropped/deserted your Relationship like a hot potato or maybe your friendship/s did not change in the slightest?

Does anyone who waters here truly believe they can accurately predict which people won't have any problem with "it" in the slightest?

There is no accounting for taste.

Or acceptance???

I'm sure at least a few here were surprised or even shocked at who was accepting and who wasn't?

[Kate Simmons]

I'm sure when I told my friends they told two friends and so on and so on. Like the old shampoo commercial. :)

[Rachael Leigh]

The only family that I know knows is son and wife, if most of my family knew more about Leigh I would probably be condemed for all of it. For most of my family crossdressing is just wrong.
I know it's not necessarily something you would say hay let me do that or want to try it but for me I really no longer know what to think especially if I wanted to tell family or if they knew.
It's been a burden to me and most likely will cause me grief in the future

[stephNE]

Only my wife knows and has seen me (not counting a few friends who are also crossdressers). I am 100% certain my three sons do not know.

[sandys40c]

I haven't told anyone and after almost 35 years I'm not sure that I ever will. The only people to see me dressed have been the SAs in stores I have had a fitting in. Even then it has only been neutral type clothes. I really have no idea if anyone in my close circle of family and friends would be accepting or not.

[franlee]

This is interesting and seems to be timely for me. I was pondering this on a few occasions the last few months as I reflect on my personal life. The thing that makes me wonder just who and how much family and some friends and even not so friends know is my first wife. She was very young and her best friend was my sister. Then when our marriage went under I consider the fact that she may have told others including her next husband. No one has ever had the gall to confront me but I have little doubt she somewhere down the line shared our experiences. She is the one that I started my CD adventures with and from that dare has been a part of me every sense. I would sure like to sit down one day and ask her. The CDing is not an issue that caused our demise but it may have been in some way that I was never made aware of. I seriously doubt it but only she can answer that. Then after I remarried my wife and I had a great relationship and CDing was a part of our life that she understood to e very rewarding to me and thus made her life more enjoyable. There was nothing she ask for that I wouldn't do or get for her if possible! And in that marriage there was a time in the beginning that I got help from the only person I ever shared with that I wasn't married to that through out the years has known without reservation or negative judgement, and that was her sister. I don't have any reason to think she has but it is possible that she could have talked to others about me. But then again when you look at the possibilities and the way people talk and a lot of the times don't think or in some cases do, it makes me wonder just what the truth is? Any way so far it hasn't bite me that I know of. So right now My ex-wife, my wife and my late wife's sister are the only people that know for sure.I sure would like to know just for my own curiosity.

[kimdl93]

I didn't have to guess who knew and who didn't. My ex wife, in the initial angry period during the dissolution of our marriage made it a point of telling my kids, my co workers and as many friends and family members as she could. It backfired to some extent, because many of those she spoke with told me, offered their support and referred to her as a vindictive, spiteful b****.

[heatherdress]

For those who maintain secrecy, it is not likely that many people know they crossdress. It is very possible to maintain privacy if careful and discrete. There are very few "grapevines" unless we establish them.

The questions about sharing your crossdressing secrets will vary depending upon how serious and careful one is to maintain their privacy as well as their judgment and circle of friends and acquaintances.

No one can predict acceptance or respect for privacy.

[Candice Mae]

It's gonna be my first Christmas this year, I've been trying to meet everyone in smaller groups ahead of time. I'm about half way there, I don't want to end up sitting at a table with everyone asking questions.

[ShannonIL]

My mom knows, and a few friends know.. Beyond that, no idea. Don't particularly care one way or the other TBH. I'm not out, but I don't really hide it if it comes up

[ShelbyDawn]

I know my ex outed me to several people, family and friends, during the divorce.
I know some of my family didn't believe her and a few others didn't care
I have no idea how far it spread but I haven't been lynched of socially ostracized yet.
A very small minority seem to be around a little less often, but that's their loss.
I just decided that I couldn't do anything about it anyway and really didn't care.
I have just kept doing the same stuff I have always done and acted like nothing has changed.
The fact is, all they really have is a rumor spread by an angry vindictive woman with an axe to grind.

[Beverley Sims]

I think those that know about me don't give a rats a*** behind anyway. :)

So far back in the past and they have never bothered to mention it in years.

[Tina B.]

My ex wife, and most of her family know I'm sure. my current wife of course. The only other person that I know, knew, was my older brother. He was there when the ex tried to keep me from seeing my kids, so she used it against me in a custody hearing, that my brother had going to with me. On the way home, I had to explain what a Transvestite was, (that was the term used in those days). After I explained it to him, he just said, Oh, never heard of it. For the next 30 years, the subject never came up again, and there was never a sign that he told anyone else.
It always came as a surprise that he didn't bring it up again, he was my main tormenter as a kid, and a bit of a bully. But as grown ups, and something so out of his realm that he kept to his self to the best of my knowledge and if I don't know, it don't matter.

[Krisi]

The list of people you can tell and be sure they won't pass it on for whatever reason is pretty short. In my case, only my wife knows. I can be pretty certain she won't tell anyone because she would be embarassed by it. Marrying a crossdresser is not something little girls dream of.

[Natasha-cd]

Most of my friends know...

If somebody don't like it, they are not my friends....

[Tina_gm]

My wife has confided in two people. One friend and one family member. I can only say that I trust both of those people in that they won't be scandalous about it. Do I know for absolute certain that neither has told anyone else, no. I do know that if certain people were to be told, then the news would spread like wildfire. So I am fairly certain that that has not happened.

I detect that this is one of those threads where the OP is sort of calling on people to lighten up about it. Yes, many people will not disown us with the knowledge. But, some will. For some of us, the knowledge can have very negative consequences in our lives. Not that it is right, just the reality of our own individual situations. There are members who have had some negative results when the knowledge gets out.

I am fortunate that the two people my wife has confided in have not told her she should leave me. The family member in fact told my wife that so long as the CDing does not consume all aspects of life and that I continue to honor my wife's comfort zone and her own limits of what she can deal with, she should in fact stay married to me. I know that my wife has certain other family members who would say exactly the opposite. And oddly enough, they are the most hypocritical as their lives are a train wreck of infidelity and all kinds of other deceitful actions and a total lack of any moral decency whatsoever. My wife has some friends who would also likely tell her to run as fast and as far away from me as possible.

My kids would suffer if the knowledge became public to all. It isn't about me, I can deal with whatever people want to say or think about me. It is about my wife and kids. They do not need to have such negative consequences put on them. Especially my kids, as they have no choice at all about who their father is. I am ok with this not be made public knowledge. One day it may happen and I will have to deal with whatever happens if it does. Until that day comes, it is nobodies business how I dress when I am alone.

[JazT95]

I say that no one knows, but I'm fairly certain my mum knows. I try to be very careful when ordering my stuff but every now and then, a parcel arrives while I'm at work or something so she signs for it instead. The amount of packages she's collected for clothes and shoes that's she's never seen me wear must give it away....

[Taylor186]

I've said this before but I will say it again. I told my wife not long ago that I thought only she and our UU minister and a psychologist knew of my crossdressing. She looked me in the eyes and said "more people know than you (me) think know." I asked for a couple of names and she gave them to me. These people have said nothing to me, and the more I thought about it the less I cared. I'm at an age and place in life where it doesn't matter. That said I am either boy (mostly) or gal (rarely and privately) so I don't push any buttons when I'm around people I "think" don't know.

[Genifer Teal]

I thought my family knew until they did find out. Then I relized they had not k own. Ops!

[suchacutie]

Since I'm very much bi-gendered with two very different personalities (just took a professional personal profiling test and omg what a difference!), it's not only easy to keep my gendered selves separate, but it would be bizarre in my context to do anything else. My wife is the only person who knows both sides of me (and she was the one who first identified the massive differences between my gendered selves), and I really do prefer having her be the only person to know both of me.

Can I predict who would be ok knowing my other gender? I can clearly identify a small fraction who would be ok with it, a small fraction who would never speak to me again, and the rest are a vast unknown response.