This may be stupid, but.............

[Erica Marie]

For those of us who decide that we want to wear certain items of clothing during our normal day, such as girls jeans, a girls t-shirt, panties, ect. Does that honestly make us a crossdresser or are we merely electing to wear what ever pleases us. For example I prefer to wear girls gym shorts for bed because they fit better and are more comfortable, I decided to ditch all my mens underwear for panties for the comfort. What is that fine line that says, ok now you are a crossdresser. Or is some form of gender identity issue that my mind says I can wear what I want when I want?

[MelanieAnne]

Yes, you're a crossdresser! Just enjoy it for what it is, and don't waste time agonizing over it. And we'll leave the light on for ya.

[SuzanneS]

AND....it's not stupid, by the way..... I'm always having these random thoughts during the day that make me second guess myself. A lot of things could happen between then and now that you have no control over, so just live your life and be happy doing it! And smile!

Suzanne

[Billie Jean]

If it makes you comfortable then it just makes you you. Wearing clothes of the opposite sex technically makes one a crossdresser. I see you and the rest as the girls that make us who we aré. Billie Jean

[MelanieAnne]

I've always got a lot of pleasure from crossdressing. Many times when I'm all dressed up, wig and makup, perfume, etc, wine and candles, I think most men don't know what they are missing. When I'm all dolled up and walking down the street on a summer night, feeling the breeze up under my dress, and hearing the sound of my heels on the sidewalk, I feel kind of sorry for all the guys sitting in smokey bars buying drinks for some barfly, and hoping to get lucky, or all the guys stuck in a loveless, boring marriage.

[Wildaboutheels]

Silly to worry about such things when not even the Forum Dinos can or will agree on any of the many terms here.

Personally I find it stupid to wear clothes because they come from a certain section in the store. If one likes the fit, comfort or style better of the "wrong" clothes why let others tell you what's the right or wrong clothes to wear?

1] The laws do not prevent it

2] The stores sell clothes to anyone with money

[MelanieAnne]

Personally I find it stupid to wear clothes because they come from a certain section in the store.

But ya gotta admit, clothes from a certain section of the store are more comfortable and fun to wear. :D

[Andy66]

Oh, lol! I thought you were going to show us a picture of a stupid outfit or something. :loc:

I think we are in a time when labels are still in the process of being defined and debated. Anyone could (and sometimes do) just make up a label to suit their own unique situation.

My opinion, you are a crossdresser if you self identify as one.

[StacyCD]

Ask yourself who does it hurt? Nobody. Just do it!

[phylis anne]

wer'e not cross dressers gigggggle we just found out that the girls stuff fits and feels better!!!
hugs phylis anne

[Jenniferathome]

Erica, my take is this: if it were choice alone, you'd not feel the need to hide it. I agree that women's underwear is more comfortable than men's. Why men's underwear needs a 1 inch wide waist band is beyond me. I have moved 100% to VS cotton briefs. I like the colors, the style and the fit. AND, I'm a cross dresser.

[Beverley Sims]

If I can't find nice lingerie that fits, or my skinny jeans look baggy, I become a very cross dresser. :)

[UNDERDRESSER]

I accept that I am a CD, but i don't think of myself as one. For me, the line is when one is trying to mimic a female.

[Rachael Leigh]

I find myself thinking the same that why not just wear what's comfortable, I too wear only panties and occasionally womens jeans, or the nice comfy gym shorts. So I say it's common

[MissTee]

I wear panties just to prove I am not a crossdresser.

{ahem}

[charlenesomeone]

Erica I feel just like you. But it's not stupid it's who we are.
I love the feel of womens panties and wear them 24/7.
I am a crossdresser just with more on at certain times.
Char

[Marcelle]

Hi Erica,

No question is ever a stupid question. This thing we do can be confusing and as I have always maintained I am not a "label gal". If you are wearing clothes because they are comfortable, you just like them or whatnot then you could in the classic textbook definition be a "cross dresser". However that is how the world writ large has chosen to define the term. It could also be you are a just a person dressing for comfort. Conversely you could also be a person who wears what women typically wear because part of you identifies female. In the end we all have to place ourselves somewhere on the spectrum but we also need to do what makes us feel good without getting too wrapped up in why we do it or what it makes us.

Be happy and comfortable sweetie . . . that is all that counts.

Hugs

Isha

[CDChloe1972]

I've always got a lot of pleasure from crossdressing. Many times when I'm all dressed up, wig and makup, perfume, etc, wine and candles, I think most men don't know what they are missing. When I'm all dolled up and walking down the street on a summer night, feeling the breeze up under my dress, and hearing the sound of my heels on the sidewalk, I feel kind of sorry for all the guys sitting in smokey bars buying drinks for some barfly, and hoping to get lucky, or all the guys stuck in a loveless, boring marriage.

YOur sentiments here are priceless MelanieAnne. I 100% agree. Well said. Hahah LOL.

And I too think labels are just for clothes not people. Wherever you find yourself that is where you are and who you are. Just enjoy yourself I reckon.

[Kate Simmons]

Does it really matter as "we" are part of the nebulous "they". Not to mention that the definition of "crossdresser" varies from person to person.:)

[Krisi]

The fact that you've joined and participate in a crossdressing web forum pretty much means you are a crossdresser. The "merely electing to wear what ever pleases us" is just a BS excuse some of us use to try to justify our crossdressing.

The bottom line of course is, you can call yourself whatever you want to and other people will call you whatever they want to. Unless it means a divorce or getting fired from your job it really doesn't matter.

[Nadine Spirit]

I am with the school of thought that we elect to wear women's clothes because of an internal gender variance. While I feel that many of my fem items are far more comfortable, many are very uncomfortable. I can maybe get the comfort thing with my undies, but what about painting my fingernails while dressed as a guy? What does that have to do with comfort? Nothing. It is an outer sign of my internal feelings. I do it for myself, so that I feel more centered and balanced, but I also do it (the nails specifically) because I want others to see that I have something a little extra going on inside.

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

On the flip side of this discussion, thiink of how many women dress for comfort even wearing men's clothes like T-shirts. I know many women who have boy style haircuts and refuse to wear makeup. I also know women who hate wearing bras and either go braless or can't wait to rip them off. My wife likes her 2-piece flannel pajamas because they're comfortable. Even sneakers can be unisex. That doesn't make them CD's. Women just have more liberties when it comes to colors or design. And given the idea that most men don't want to appear effeminate then they wear whatever makes them look masculine. I'd say that we have discovered the fine aspects of wearing comfortable women's clothes whether we want to call ourselves CD or not.

Cheryl

[karanne]

What is a "crossdresser"? Am I one because I wear men's boxers as house shorts? Because I've worn a necktie with a bodysuit blouse that looks like a button-down shirt? I think that if it's comfortable and doesn't break the law (even if it's a stupid law like women can't go topless) then you go for it!

Now I wouldn't wear 6" heels on a construction site, but at work, in the office? Yeah, momma's so got those!

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

Further thought --- I once had a meeting with a short-haired gal whose family owned and operated a gravel pit. She was dressed in a flannel shirt, jeans, and work boots and drove a diesel pickup with dual rear wheels and she worked the office. She was cool!

Cheryl

[bridget thronton]

Labels tend to lose information in the world of numbers (losing important details) they are only useful as a means of lumping things together (good for statistics and perhaps not so good for individuals). So like Isha - i do not worry too much about the labels people try to attach to me since they are arbitrary and can change in an instant if the need suits them

[Jennifer W]

I have days I wear "boy" clothes and days I wear "girls" clothes. Days I mix. Never wear wigs, forms, makeup, padding or anything of that sort. I don't own "men's" undies. I have to be "all boy" as much as possible when my wife and kids are around. I consider myself to be a person who wears clothes. I guess it makes me a crossdresser and that's fine.

[Sarasometimes]

Our society would consider you a crossdresser. Now there isn't such a rush to judgement for women who do the same with items from the men's department! As far as it being stupid, it is not at all stupid. I wish I could stop at just wearing those items en male but i only feel comfortable and confident doing so enfemme with all the trimmings but i am making some progress in your direction.

Jenniferathome, I agree about the 1" wide elastic waistband that has been around since 1935 or so. That is why i buy Reebok women's compression shorts. They have a built in comfortable waistband.

[KlaireLarnia]

I wear female clothes each day, they are normally female versions of what I would wear as a man - does that make me a cross dresser? Yes of course it does I am wearing clothes for the opposite sex. But it can be very liberating and something which if done right can go largely unnoticed. Trousers/Jeans blend in well, ankle boots can be hidden under trousers and if chosen well look similar to male versions. A lot of T-shirts are wearable as are most [plain] jumpers.

[Tiffany Jane]

Clothes are designed to serve the main purpose of protecting the body from the elements or to portray a style and all clothing is functional for its created intention. Although the cut, style, patterns may object a gender bias, the real value in any article of clothing is in its ability to provide comfort of being to the person wearing it. I wear certain required clothes to work and can't wait to get them off when I get home, but it pays the bills. I can wear Wranglers, tshirt, and boots all day and be fine. Give me an hour or two to put on a dress and heels, balance. Don't mind taking off the boots and socks and seeing pink toenails. Just a reminder that under all this man is a softer, gentler side. It depends on the individual, some feel the need for further feminization while some just need a quick splash in the "Pink Fog".

[Michelle Charles]

I think this is a very personal difference. We all ended up here for a wide variety of social and birth reasons. Therefore, whatever is is for you is great, don't let other people define you! That where crossdresser comes from right, some type of social definition. Women do this very thing , all the time, w/o worrying over some type of gender association. We should have the same right!

[Nikki A.]

If I'm trying to present as a female (wig, make up the works) then I am cross dressing.
My everyday wear includes panties, trouser socks and ladies jeans. To me this is not cross dressing, I just find that they fit better.
Then there are times when I do push the limits by adding a female styled or cut top, maybe a bra (natural C cup) and a little foundation. I guess the bra puts me over the edge, but sometimes I just don't care.
In other words, everyone has their own definition and comfort level. Why try to label it.

[Cheryl T]

I don't really care what you call it. I wear what makes me feel good and that includes underdressing when I can't be fully dressed.

[Dana L]

I think most of us here are CD and were are ok with that. I think we wear what makes us comfortable, whether it be physically or mentally. I personally have found womens panties and socks are far more comfortable than mens. Also because of my body shape womens jeans fit much better, and I have very narrow feet so womens shoes fit much better. So do I wear them just for the physical comfort or some mental need to wear womens clothes. Who cares it makes both aspects of me happy and that's what's important.

[Jilmac]

Erica, the labels put on us by society are nothing more than a description of how we choose to dress. If you feel comfortable with the items you choose to wear, then you are being yourself. When I describe myself as a person who enjoys wearing feminine attire, I label myself as bi gender because I get the best of both worlds, as a guy or a girl.

[mechamoose]

You are, by strict definition, a crossdresser.

I have worn 'girl clothes' (jeans, some tops, stockings, nails, 'subtle' makeup) for years. The only ones who ever noticed were other girls, and I never got any negative comments. I did get 'whats up with 'X' questions from guys, but 'because I like it' answered those Q's. Done.

- MM

[MissTee]

Erica, I don't think you have anything to worry about. It's very clear you are not a crossdresser.

[Erica Marie]

Erica, I don't think you have anything to worry about. It's very clear you are not a crossdresser.

I really want to thank everyone for taking time to respond.

Logically I know I am "classified" as a crossdresser. But over the years I have gone trough so many stages that I am finally realizing who I am. I am a transgender or maybe a bigender individual who hates labels and just wishes society would allow me to be myself without criticism.

[NicoleScott]

You wear womens' undies because they are womens' undies. Are there really no comfortable mens' undies? Most all of us twist feeble excuses into valid reasons for crossdressing.

[Tina B.]

Erica, even if wearing panties, girls shorts, didn't make you a CD, I think those earrings your wearing in you Avatar does.

[Dana L]

Logically I know I am "classified" as a crossdresser. But over the years I have gone trough so many stages that I am finally realizing who I am. I am a transgender or maybe a bigender individual who hates labels and just wishes society would allow me to be myself without criticism.
Same here, couldn't have said it better myself!
Huggs Dana

[Monique53]

My $.02 worth on this is that if I'm wearing clothing that is typically made for women, then I'm a crossdresser regardless of the comfort factor or fit! I prefer to wear a garter belt and stockings, finding these more comfortable than bulky male socks, but, would be hard pressed to convince most people that I'm not crossdressing. I know that some here wear a bra because they need the support, but again, you have the same issue. As many others have pointed out, wear what you like and forget about the labels because it's really your personal choice as to what you wear as long as you're not breaking some indecency laws. Besides, I think it's amusing to watch "normal" people try to figure me out!
Monique

[Angie G]

You sound like you have a broblem thinking of yourself as a crossdresser. It's not a bad thing just enjoy the dressing hun.:hugs:
Angie

[MsVal]

Nearly everyone has a comfortable place between the two extreems of girly-girl and manly-man. Some are able to be at their comfortable place all the time, some only on weekends, some, never. Some never even realize that is the reason for their discontent.

Erica, you have found your comfortable place. You know it, and now so do we.