I could never, ever...

[Wildaboutheels]

pass in a million years because...

???

So "I will never go out dressed" is a fairly common train of thought around here.

JMO, But I believe that unless one is over, let's say 6.5 feet in bare feet [and would simply refuse to go out wearing flats] you could "pass". Even "pass" as a female out in the RW. "Pass" easily if you were SITTING down somewhere [in a typical ladylike fashion] and not sitting like a man typically might. With a book or tablet or cell phone in hand just doing your thing, minding your own business. No need to "master" any other mannerisms/body language etc. of a "typical" female. Of course you would need to GET to that bench in a busy park or chair in a food court.

I'm not trying to pry anyone out of their closet. But for some, would being "dressed" out in the RW, just sitting and watching people be ENOUGH? If 100 walk or jog by or 500 and never bat an eye... did you "pass" as a female or "pass" as just another fellow Human?

Would you toss and turn at night wondering and/or worrying about it? At the end of the day when your head hits the pillow does it make any difference?

Participation or response not mandatory of course. Food for thought and nothing more.

[NicoleScott]

Passing may be the holy grail of crossdressing for some, but not for all of us. Back when I went out a lot (not so much now) I could, and did, pass OK. But it required that I seriously tone down the look I prefer. I would much rather dress my way (everything over-the-top) than tone it down and not be noticed when I go out. There was some payoff for me by passing/blending (yes, it was thrilling in a way), but a huge payoff (excitement) staying home and transforming into the look I prefer.

I agree with you (your JMO paragraph). Dressing conservatively, sitting and doing something (reading, web surfing) and not attracting attention is possible for most, but what fun is that?

[Jaylyn]

I really enjoy the dressing and have no intention of ever going out in public. I feel I might or might not pass. I like Nicole stated I enjoy just staying dressed at home and doing what I enjoy doing and that is relaxing in my dresses. I put on way too much makeup to go I to the public also. I also wear my skirts way to short but that's the way I like them. I have visited with some Texas ladies who said they would take me out in a town about three hours from home and we could go dancing and clubbing. I have turned them down and am just contented to stay put for awhile. Although the thought has crossed my mind to experience it once someday.

[Nadine Spirit]

I began passing much more once I stopped worrying about passing. That is of course when I am fully dressed.

I certainly do not pass when I mix up my gender presentation. But in another sense I still pass. Meaning, people pay no attention to me, for the most part.

[Beverley Sims]

I feel I am successful if I do not attract attention or odd looks.
That is how it is most of the time.
The only thing I pass is other traffic when I am driving too damn fast. :)

[Kate Simmons]

I guess the reason you go out dressed would have a lot to do with it. I have nothing to prove out there so could care less. The main reason I go out to the club dressed is to have fun dancing en femme and the "high" I get from the energy generated from that is my payoff. We all have our own reasons for dressing.:battingeyelashes::)

[Alana Lucerne]

I am one of those who will never pass, but that does not bother me. I have never really made any effort to pass.

For me passing is not the goal. Passing means to be identified or accepted as a woman and that is not what I am trying to do. And it's a good thing because there is no chance of it happening.

I am a crossdresser. I take this to mean a person of one gender wearing the clothes of another. So I am a man wearing women's clothing. That is what makes me feel good, not being identified as a woman. My mannerisms (sorry for the pun) are a man's, it's just the things that I wear are a woman's.

So what would make me happy would be to wear the clothing that I enjoy and to have that accepted by all around me. I don't wish for anyone to think that I am a woman.

That's my thinking so far on this subject. I admit that these thoughts are not finished and I accept that others may have a completely different opinion. Good on you for that.

Alana

[SANDRA MICHELLE]

I go out frequently and maybe I am different but passing doesn't worry me. I go out because I want to go out dressed en-femme and I don't do it to make any statements or to get any approval from anyone else. Do I pass, sometimes maybe from about 1 mile out and only with the naked eye, LOL!!!!! I do try to present as feminine as possible and sometimes I do better than other times. Go out my friends, it is a blast!

[Jennifer-GWN]

I guess on the topic of passing in public vs not being noticed is 2 different things. Not being noticed is more a function of the reality that people just go about their day to day life. They don't head to shopping on a mission to discover a person cding. Now in the public mix there are folks that have a tendency to be more observant or aware of that which is happening around them. Take this situation and the possibility of a eye catching glance from the general population and you move into the passing rheum where your presentation and confidence come into play. That's the difference between blending and passing. 2 different but somewhat related things.

My new found strength to go out in public is based on the first premise that nobody is specifically looking to catch me and if I get a passing glance hopefully confidence will carry me through knowing full well that on inspection I'd be read.

[Pantyhoselover1979]

I know I couldn't pass i'm built like a football player 6'1" 270# and wide shoulders plus I have a beard lol but I have no desire to go out of the house

[Ashley Lyn]

I'm kind of wishy-washy on the subject.. I would LOVE to go out in short skirts, thigh highs, short heels + the wig and accessories..
Unfortunately, being almost 70 forces me to longer skirts/dresses, pumps/flats etc..
Thus I CAN go out, and I do sporadically, but not 'presented' like I desire.. I do my best to present as a woman, age wise..
But at home; let it fly.. :D

[Katey888]

Wild, I think you're right when you say most muggles out there don't care and don't notice...

Some folk want to go out and do - some don't and won't - and others are somewhere in between.

But we can only really judge for our own environments, motivations and needs - we're all individuals and do what we please, because not everyone lives in an environment where it would be safe to express a different gender. I've also read and seen enough here now to believe that 'passing' means different things to different folk... Mostly it means not being noticed and if noticed then ignored or at least, not confronted... that's all. So yes, you passed a human - and all credit to the muggle humans who are mostly tolerant of what they would consider to be slightly weird, to the extent they probably just shrug and go on their way.

Some folk don't go out for other reasons - and that is a perfectly valid position for anyone. :)

Katey x

[ReluctantDebutant]

Passing is relative. It is easy to pass when you are just another anonymous person in a crowd with folks to busy with their own lives to pay attention to you. I know I have done it. But it is harder when you are closer and more stationary like sitting on a bus or subway with only the other passengers to look at and them looking back. It is even harder when the person has to serve you and you have to have their direct attention like waiters/waitress or a sales assistant. Getting clocked by them is almost a certain.

[paulaprimo]

if i could pass any better i would be quarterbacking for the ny jets, cause we suk!! :D

i'd love to go out in my mini, thigh highs and heels also, but not wanting to attract much
attention i dressed blah, age appropriate and to blend. it is still a huge high for me.
when i first started going out i would go out late nights or when stores were getting ready to close
just to avoid crowds. but what i noticed was, the less people around the more likely they would check
you out as it is only naturally to glance over at the only other person out. i kinda got a complex. so now i go out
when there are bigger crowds, and it seems that i'm invisible as nobody cares. :)

[Tonya Rose]

i prefer to stay home and dress the way i like (sexy) to the nines. i did go out to dinner once. with my wife.thankfully she convinced me to tone it down bit or i would have been spotted a mile away. most women around here dress to the threes. lol.. and besides i dont have to worry about being accepted here ....

[AngelaYVR]

A year ago I never even considered going out. Now I have started to and have found it to be quite the thrill. I have bought a coat for the cold weather and borrow scarves and hats from the missus. If anyone is considering going out for the first time, then this is a good time of year as you can hide that little bit more under cold weather accessories :)

Angela xx

[Julie Denier]

I never considered going out in public dressed until presented the opportunity to do so in a safe environment away from home with a forum sister. I had a great time and would do it again given a similar scenario. But I have no desire to go out en femme among "civilians," either to blend or dressed to the nines, in everyday life. I'm just a big ol' fat dude who likes to wear dresses, heels and makeup, and it was just nice to not have to do that alone for a change.

[sabrinaedwards]

I enjoy going out dressed. I really believe that it is a state of mind in terms of passing. For example my wife and I were out for dinner recently. I said did you notice the couple that was seated previously to us? She said you mean the 2 ladies? One was a male and not dressed as a female but he had long hair and was thin. He looked somewhat female. When I dress as a female, I assume the persona of a lady. If you project that attitude, I think that you will blend in as a female.

[Dana L]

I think the key is to dress age appropriate and occasion appropriate. I could pass from a distance but up close I don't think so. I'm 6'3" and 190 with very large hands. Generally most of us can pass to some, but we'll never pass to all. So if you can accept that and not care about the ones you didn't pass to, then go for it.

[Ilsa]

Paula,

Just remember the good old days when Joe Willie wore pantyhose! Look what it did for his career.

[Nikki A.]

To me passing is irrelevant, I try my best to look my best. If I look respectable and blend in then I am happy. If I'm read but I look good so what!

[Dianne S]

I can pass from a distance (5m or more) because luckily I'm small, even for a GG. Also, most people going about their business don't pay much attention to others.

Up close, I'm pretty sure I don't pass. However, waitresses, sales clerks, etc. have all treated me very well without giving any hints they've clocked me except maybe a slight knowing smile. And I'm fine with that.