Flying pretty yyz to sfo today and completely comfortable

[Jennifer-GWN]

No not me but sure felt good as an observer. I was traveling this morning from toronto to san francisco. Was dealing with an upgrade request and looking down when the lady walked up with her own question. Amazing well defined legs, new pantyhose and lovely patten leather shows with a 4 inch heal. As I gazed up she was wearing a very stylish short school girlish skirt. Nice outfit so far. Above that a plade boy shirt. Omg... My first encounter. Although 100% male above the waist my heart went into overdrive and I just wanted to go over and say "you look great". The part that made it was just the sheer confidence she exuded. Looking around the equally refreshing part of this situation was NO ONE made an inclingly of visual unexceptance or grimise. Gives me renewed faith and strength for my own adventures.

She wasn't traveling alone as during the boarding process she was with a gg companion and both were sporting nice wedding rings. Learning #2 nice couple with complete acceptance.

Now while seated my seatmate made a comment something like this ... "We're in for a treat on this flight as we have a crossdresser a a passenger. At this point the couple had not boarded but I was still smiling inside. My response to her was "...and she looked fantastic". A little banter ensued for that comment which led to her commenting "I wonder what bathroom he uses". Oh.... I'm ready for this one given recent threads. "Well in ontario she's allowed to go where she's most comfortable". Thinking this might wake this lady up a bit. Next comment from her ... Can you guess... "Well I wouldn't feel safe if he was in the ladies room. My retort.... "There's a lot more situations in the world to worry about then that. Bathrooms are a safe zone". She umphed and I chuckled even more to myself.

After the couple boarded I couldn't help to make a comment to my female seatmate. "You know I'm guessing 1/2 the women on this flight wished they had legs like hers. The lady responded with "well mine are better" pulling up her leg. I thought to myself nope not even close.

I thought about pursuing the conversation further but it was clense this lady was a bit loopy and I needed to get some work done on the flight so on went the headphones.

After we arrived the couple continued on to baggage claim like everyone else... Business as usual.

Lessons for me... Just own it and keep your personal confidence high. Again no pitchforks and angry mobs. Be yourself in the moment.

If by chance this girl is one of our community and reads this... You made my day and this brief moment was very meangful for me. You looked awesome girl.

Cheers... Jennifer

[ReineD]

After the couple boarded I couldn't help to make a comment to my female seatmate. "You know I'm guessing 1/2 the women on this flight wished they had legs like hers.

I so don't understand what this proves. Is there a competition? lol. Does having well-shaped legs make one person more attractive overall than another? A lot of people have "better", or more attractive assets than others. Some people have teeth and smiles to die for! Others have flawless skin. Others have perfectly straight noses, or a perfect head of thick, curly (or straight depending on personal preferences) hair. Some men are shaped like Adonis while some women have a perfect 36-24-36 figure.



Lessons for me... Just own it and keep your personal confidence high.

I agree! Just please try to not turn it into a competition. The totality of a person is in their physical and non-physical attributes (personality and character), and not just in one or two physical feature.

Another point is that you, as a crossdresser, are more flexible with accepting presentations that cross the gender lines or that are not binary. Please remember that the average person lives in the gender-binary male/female world. This is what 99.9% of us grow up with and see all around us every day. So in my opinion it is a good idea to try to not be antagonistic with people who have very little exposure to gender-nonnonconforming individuals and who make comments based on ignorance. To use the old adage, you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. Plus, it would set you off as an open-minded, caring individual.

[Beverley Sims]

If I notice "anything" I usually just turn over and go to sleep.
A great cure for "Jet Lag". :)

Just a thought, if you read her she couldn't have looked "that" awesome.

[LaurenS]

Great story!

[flatlander_48]

Just a thought, if you read her she couldn't have looked "that" awesome.

Although 100% male above the waist my heart went into overdrive and I just wanted to go over and say "you look great".

[Kris Avery]

I wish I could have been there. I would have been sure to be positive in some way in front of them - and - my seatmate.:devil:

[CONSUELO]

In so many situations the key is great confidence in yourself. I have read many stories of people who have "bluffed" their way through difficult situations in war zones and always they main thing is to show outward confidence and strength.
As human beings we seem to respond to shows of weakness, as opposed to shows of defenselessness, by being aggressively critical. Good for this person that they feel so confident that they don't seem to give a hoot about what anyone else thinks.

[Isabella Ross]

That's quite an encounter...thank you, Jennifer, for relating it. I love this couple's attitude. But I find myself just a little curious how you clocked her...what was the giveaway for you and your seatmate (who sounds a little bitter)?

[Jennifer-GWN]

Bridgette;

When writing this post I struggled with the use of pronouns in this case as waist down presentation was female whereas waist up male but with clear female mannerisms. We were standing next to each other dealing with seating issues prior to boarding. I could feel the confidance and comfort radiating outward. I won't soon forget this as I continue to grow and deal with my own transition challenges.

As for my seatmate; total stranger Guessing early 60's, its clear that dispite no fuss or outwardly apparent attention from those in the boarding area people notice and I guess given the opportunity to make a comment they will either to a total stranger or at the dinner table that night.

My responses to her comments was a chance to perhaps gently provide perspective that probably would not have been offered generally from others. In reflection I've questioned wether in my response I should have been more forthcoming and disclosed that I'm beginning my own transitional journey myself however, seeing I'm not the most chatty orientated traveller it allowed the conversation to end so that I could cocoon in my headset and get some work done.

It doesn't matter if this person was trans, cd, guy in a dress, whatever, in the end the confidence and ease radiated an inner beauty.

Cheers.... Jennifer

[ReineD]

My responses to her comments was a chance to perhaps gently provide perspective that probably would not have been offered generally from others.

I don't engage in cross-gender expression, although my SO does and I'm 100% supportive. I have also taken the opportunity to help correct other people's ignorance when they have said things in my presence that were less than kind. Mostly people don't really know what to make of gender-nonconforming folks and they react with a snicker and a chuckle, as your seat-mate did early in your conversation.

But, I do not point out how much better a CD/TG/TS looks compared to a woman. This is just too ill-natured. I instead tell the truth, that I know someone who experiences gender issues and that it is not done for a lark or for thrills, but rather is an innate condition and it takes a lot of courage to express nonconforming gender identity in the face of a mostly non-understanding world. I don't judge the people who don't understand, I don't try to put them down by telling them how much better CDs/TGs/TSs look. I simply try to explain in the most objective way I can that not everyone fits the male/female binary and this is OK. I find that this approach makes people try to look at it from the other side, rather than feel attacked and dig in their heels by saying something like, "Well, my legs are better!", as did your seat-mate. There's nothing to be gained by creating a competition.

[Jennifer-GWN]

Reiner.... There was nothing antonistic in our short conversation in either direction nor competitive in a hurtful or degrading way.