things we like to do

[GabbiSophia]

It is said that transition only ends the gd..which would be a great thing.. with that said though since we do not change who we are through transition how have those who have transitioned how has your old hobbies changed? I guess a better question is how has your Hobby changed e if you didn't stop it? One of my favorite things to do is offshore fish. Now getting with the guys to run 60 miles out is no biggy now but I am not sure how I will be excepted when it's a ratio of one girl to 4 guys on the boat. I am sure the dynamic of the hobbies must change but do you still find yourself able to enjoy them or is there to much tension?

I will say this though that i have really spent a ton of time finding out what i like versus what i did to compensate. That is eye opening for sure and I figure I will find new hobbies. I am just curious of the ones that stay.

I know this sounds trial but enjoying life and the few hobbies have mean a ton to me.

[Aprilrain]

I have a friend who lives in FL and her best (female) friend is really into off shore fishing, she does it with a group of women. This is 2014, women do pretty much all the same things men do for sport or fun, they just do it without cigars : P
There are probably some women who even enjoy cigars (yuck)
I've picked up a couple of new hobbies since I transitioned that are considered traditionally female, sewing and knitting. I really like sewing but knitting is so portable and gives me something to do on the go, though I'm not a very sophisticated knitter. I've made some coasters and I'm working on a couple of scarfs.
I was never into anything that was overtly male dominated as far as sport or hobbies go but I'm a trained carpenter and I can say with confidence that I have never work with, seen or even heard of a woman doing carpentry professionally, or any of the other building trades for that matter. I'm not saying they don't exist I'm just saying I've been around a fair number of construction sites and never seen one myself. I still enjoy doing it though. My girlfriend and I had been doing some pretty heavy duty remodeling to her house just before we had surgery and I think I like doing that type of work even more now that I've transitioned! There are a few more projects on the horizon as soon as I'm feeling better. We both like watching "this old house" and "rehab addict" too.

[Frances]

This question has been asked a million times on this forum. Here is my answer:

I stopped caring about some things when I transitioned (I was a collector). I stopped accumulating things needlessly (I was a bit of hoarder). I stopped playing music with other people and sold most of my equipment. I put all my electronics stuff away. Now, 7 years into HRT and almost 4 years post-op. I am rebuilding my guitar rig, hanging out with musicians and modifying my effect pedals and soldering cables together.

For me transition was NOT about a journey to another side. It was always about closing the gap. That is why I never understood all that talk about boy mode and girl mode. With transition, I was looking to be whole, not amputate something (no pun intended). Yet, I put away a lot of stuff. I didn't do because it was guy stuff, I did it because being stealth and doing this stuff was incompatible (without moving to another city at least). So I went around and presented myself again to everyone who could recognize me and took the soldering kit out of the closet (again... no pun...).

[Kaitlyn Michele]

Almost exactly the same for me...
the biggest difference (and I think this was more circumstance than being different because I have kids, I live 3 miles from my ex and we are very close) is that I never gave up my gear and my mini hoarding!!!

Also April I was offered to join a knitting club too!!! Not sure if I want to get into that at all, but in a subtle way I was pleased to be asked because i felt included....

I am much more the "same" today as I am different. The GD is gone (I like to say obliterated because in my mind, if you have intense GD there is no halfway) and I look a lot different...I am very comfortable in my own skin

but my habits, my attitude, my movie and music tastes, my sports fandom... (I really tried to like chic flicks and micheal buble) all stayed pretty much the same..i still loudly argue with my dad, brother, and old college friends about our football teams..
(btw...my female therapist is a huge Philly Eagles fan, and when i say that she laughs at my sexist statement!!)

In my previous past, I was always pretty intuitive and empathetic...I was a good listener, but I could never resist either one upping(such a guy thing) or giving my advice (as you all know that hasn't changed!!)

a funny example is that two weeks ago I went to a blues jam at a guys house...I walked in and there were 5 guys in the kitchen...I fit right in because it was about guitars...and I listened (and partook) of the me me me stories...each guy talked about himself one at a time unless they were interrupted...

as we went to the barn we passed through the dining room were I met the wives.... I said hi and the room exploded into everybody talking at once...oh your shoes are cute...oh I love your hair color...don't let my husband boss you around...I practically broke out in a sweat...I was literally disoriented LOL.....

to me the real "Work" happens after real transition... the doctors and therapists help you get there...then its up to you to do something ...but i can assure you its ok because as you live you feel "normal"...the ups and downs feel like your ups and downs and you stop obsessing

[I Am Paula]

My interests and hobbies have not changed, but peoples perception of said interests are really weird, and misogynist. If I go into a guitar store I've not been to, it is assumed I'm a beginner, and talked down to. They assume I have no idea what a good guitar costs, or how to handle one. I like to mess with their tiny minds, and say 'I was thinking of getting a guitar', let them tune it for me, and them play some stupidly complex Brad Paisley, or Marty Stewart riffs.

My other hobby is home reno. I'm not afraid of tackling the big jobs, like moving walls, or replumbing a bathroom. The people at Home Depot treat me like an idiot. 'Did you know there are different brands of nailguns? You'll need to ask your husband which ones to buy', or, 'Will you need a screwdriver that fits those screws ?' I was building a basement apartment for a friend and a city inspector walked in, and asked who was the foreman. I said 'Me'. He said 'No, REALLY'. Butthole.

[Kimberly Kael]

No change in my hobbies at all. I'm still a gamer, a hobbyist musician, and I still enjoy photography. How I approach each has changed a little, but my interests remain the same. So I'm less prone to lugging around a ton of photo gear as my upper body strength wanes and it clashes with what I'm wearing, and I find sexism in gaming less palatable than before.

[Aprilrain]

That's odd Paula, I have not had any bad reactions at Home Depot or Lowes though my GF and I are definitely noticed for being the chicks that are there everyday buying heavy duty tools and loading 2x10s and 3/4 inch plywood onto our cart. I've never been treated with anything but professionalism.

[DeeDee1974]

Prior to transition I would go golfing, a lot. Sometimes up to three times a week. While I still enjoy golf, I only did it twice this year and I only played nine holes both times.

If you can call going to the spa a hobby I have really embraced that. Or just pampering myself in general. I probably get two massages a month. I also get mani-pedis pretty much weekly with one of my close girlfriends.

Like many playing music is a big part of my life. I grew up playing piano. In college I picked up the guitar and taught myself to play all the power chords so I could play with the guys. I wasn't great but good enough to play with the guys and play in a couple cover bands. Now I've really abandoned the guitar and gone back to the piano. So much kinder and gentler.

[I Am Paula]

Aprilrain.- Not BAD, just condescending. The female employees are worse than the men. On the positive side, I never load drywall or plywood anymore, I just stand there a minute, and someone does it for me.

DeeDee- This season I just got used to playing in women's clothes, bending at the knees to set a tee, and hitting from the red tees. Next season I have to relearn the whole game, as I now have...hmmm...BIG boobs.

[Jorja]

I still love to play co-ed baseball, restore or build motorcycles, needle point, crochet, sewing, gardening, cooking, woodworking including wood turning, hunting and fishing, rock climbing and the list goes on. Just because I have transitioned and had SRS doesn't mean I died.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

When i was trying to get into franchising, i showed up at the meeting with a list of questions and he was very irritated at me and at the end my lawyer said that he never met a woman so "on the ball"....at the time i was just floored...he assumed an easy mark...he could spend "hours" of my money reading a document...and when i asked him detailed questions he said he had to spend more time.....and more of my money...i fired him...

and to be honest i humiliated him with the franchise manager and he lost alot of business because of me.....

My franchise contractor was the same way, but he was older and he was so sweet... he bent over backwards and made lots of concessions i do not believe he would have made to a man...in the end i didn't go through with things, and he couldn't have been more helpful and admitted to me that even though he lost the business he thought i made the right decision..

Also when i was dropping the franchise, the president of the company called me and asked me stop being so emotional.. I told him i did a detailed five year plan and could not see a way to make money, i offered to show it to him and even fly to his office and he turned me down and reiterated that he felt i was just "Scared"....ugh....

Here's the thing to me
....gender informs EVERYTHING...literally EVERYTHING....its always there, every interaction, every moment...its the single most important organizing principle in our lives... that's why gender dysphoria is so brutal..

[DeeDee1974]

Paula - the loss of strength and addition of breasts have definitely impacted my game. I was never a big hitter, but I could hit it straight. Ever since my BA I have a horrible slice.

It doesn't help that my main golf partner is my ex-wife and she continues to get better and let me know about it. Despite getting older her arms are getting more defined and her drives are getting longer.
She was a bit patronizing this summer, telling me I should spend more time working on my game than picking cute golf outfits.

Maybe next year I'll take some lessons.

[Angela Campbell]

I wouldn't say that my hobbies have changed, maybe some have been "put on hold" more or less. Not that I have lost interest in them, but there is no time anymore. Before I transitioned I had almost no friends, didn't go anywhere or interact with others. My hobbies were playing and building guitars, building and working in my home studio, reading, and cooking. All things I did alone. Very shortly after I went full time I got into a relationship and since there has been so little time for any of those that I only spend a fraction of the time I used to on any of them.

I do still have a lot of interest in all of those but they have become more like something I will get around to eventually. I do not think I have really started any new hobbies or interests. I am still me.

[Aprilrain]

HA! i just remembered, went to a movie a few months ago, can't remember which one but I'm sure it involved aliens. My GF and I were the only chicks in the theater:heehee:

[Kaitlyn Michele]

I saw Tusk 2 months ago...I was the ONLY person in the theatre...

I took the opportunity to make phone calls and text which made it a new experience!!!

[Jorja]

HA! i just remembered, went to a movie a few months ago, can't remember which one but I'm sure it involved aliens. My GF and I were the only chicks in the theater:heehee:


I saw Tusk 2 months ago...I was the ONLY person in the theatre...

I took the opportunity to make phone calls and text which made it a new experience!!!

You mean they still have movie theaters? I can't tell you the last time I was in a theater for a movie.

[GabbiSophia]

Lol prom was boring and suppose to be a prequel to aliens saying the humans were pigs for the slaughter.


To be honest i must not have come across clear. I know our hobbies stay the same. I mean how where you excepted since the change. I read a few posts and it seems the same as always ... male dominated world... ok whatever. I get women can do anything but it was more about how you experience the same hobby.

[Frances]

I don't know what "I mean how where you excepted since the change" means, but for the last comment, I will say this: I am a member of music forum on which new forumites often comment about having ordered a guitar and then ask others what to expect. The responses are pretty much always "wait till you get it. Why are you asking now?"

So... why are you asking now?

[DebbieL]

Debbie had better social skills. I didn't have to be an "undercover spy" worrying that I might say something that would give me away.
As a result, I enjoy interacting with people more. I like talking to others and they like talking to me, because I really listen.
I'm also more authentic. People used to sense the deceptiveness, and assumed I was going to rip them off or something.

Of course I love shopping, but now I really love being able to go with my wife, try on lots of different styles, and get her opinion, which I usually follow.

I still sing in the church choir, but now, for the hymns, I sing tenor. For the anthems, there's a shortage of basses so I sing baritone.

One thing I'd like to do is get my chords shortened so I could sing Mezzo soprano. I used to sing Soprano from age 8 to 11.

I still do computers, but I don't do as much geek stuff, because I also like communicating much more in social groups.

[Michelle789]

I am happier, more relaxed, more natural, more myself, more focused, more social, and care more about my appearance than that other guy did. I also enjoy shopping now, and talk more about feelings and relationships than I used to. I am more open and more talkative than that other guy was.

I now have a boyfriend. That other guy had no interest in dating, and was not good at actually being a guy, especially when it came to chasing after women.