Flying pretty, almost anyway

[Jackie7]

Recent threads about flying en femme prod me to post this true-life TSA story. Last winter we flew home from Salt lake City after I broke my wrist in a fall on the ice. I’m wearing a metal brace inside a sling buttoned into a denim jacket that has metal buttons. I dump my overcoat, shoes and belt into the tub but the full-body scanner goes mad so they wave me off to the side to raise both arms overhead for a personal workout. Now, I’ve been holding my jeans up with my only good hand, and as I let go to raise my good arm I feel my jeans sliding down off my skinny old ass.

Now I don't actually own any male underwear any more, and in that instant I remember that I am underdressed in silky salmon-pink panties with a matching lacy camisole. I'm both embarrassed and angry as my trousers settle around my knees and the male TSA agent wands my armpits for explosives. I ask whether the agent is having fun yet but he doesn't answer and before I start to make a scene I realize that it’s actually very funny, in a screw-you kind of way. I mean it's not against the law for me to wear whatever I want, it’s just my clothes and nobody's damn business, I can hardly believe our so-called civilization has come down to this, the TSA's dumb procedures created this situation so you all can deal with it, I no longer care. I mean it felt like a moment of divine liberation.

And as I recovered my aplomb and with more than a little bit of awkward struggling hoist my trousers into place, I look around and I realize that although I am in full view alongside the scanning machines, nobody is watching, nobody else cares, everybody's immersed in their own little TSA dramas… and now I’m one step closer to flying fully en femme.

[Marcelle]

Hi Jackie,

Well, that is quite the story and I am glad you managed to find both an epiphany of sorts and some humour. :) You would think though given your injury the TSA Agents would have been a bit more helpful rather than let your pants fall to the ground.

Hugs

Isha

[Leslie Langford]

LOL!...next best thing to "mooning" someone/something to show your displeasure at having been p*ssed off by them beyond reasonable endurance. Anti-establishment guerrilla tactics at their best!

Loved your story, Jackie, and wish I could have been a fly on the wall to witness this surreal scene. You go, girl! ;)

[Allison Chaynes]

Great story, Jackie! I was worried the last time I flew, years ago, that somehow someone would freak out because I wore panties under my suit. Your experience is reassuring.

[Nancy Sue]

Great story! Like Allison I used to worry about wearing panties under my clothes, and would wait to put on thigh highs, bra and small forms until I got into the bathroom after passing through TSA. But, like doctors and nurses, they have seen everything everyone wears - and they don't care one whit. (Although I am sure at times they think "hmm, I might get one of those". The rules posted on the airlines web page say - they may not ask you to remove medical devices or things like breast forms. Since you had a sling on - they were restricted from asking you to remove it, or raise your hands. And since you knew you were going to get scanned and felt out, why bother to remove your belt - but then, where would the fun have been in that? Salmon-pink is a great color.

[Vickie_CDTV]

Is there any option for the "pat-down" to occur in a private room? If I remember right, in some countries it is given as an option.

[jjjjohanne]

One time, I wore a skirt over my panties at the airport. No make up or anything. People noticed, but they treated me with respect. It was a stressful, pleasant non-event.