Question from a CD about CD wives/girlfriends

[Gigicd]

Friends, I think of this a lot, and wondered what your opinion is. Your opinions would help me as I try to understand my life.

I am mature, divorced once, had a couple of serious engagements that didn't work out, and currently alone.

Here's the question:

What % of CD wives/girlfriends would "out" their husband or boyfriend, or "use" their husband's/boyfriend's CD-ing against him by "outting" him to others in times of problems in their relationship, or in times of break-up, or divorce?​

[AllieSF]

I don't know of any statistics on this but it is probably similar to the number of SO's who will, or have already retaliated to their partner by revealing something that is private between the two of them, and those that do over the top and in my opinion totally wrong reactions after finding out something like an affair, or whatever. You read sometimes in the media about wives, husbands, girlfriends and boy friends damaging personal property of the other all the time when upset, trashed cars, clothes thrown out the windows into the yard or street. I think that some of these types of people may be able to be identified as potential retaliators based on how they react to other things in their life that do go there way. On the other side are those peaceful and loving people who seem to go berserk when one of their rare hot buttons gets pushed unknowingly. You probably need to be an expert to identify those people.

[Jenniferathome]

It depends on the animosity of the parties at the breakup. Hatred, anger, pain will drive people to seek vengeance. Wives and husbands make up allegations all the time to "win."

[~Joanne~]

I don't think anyone here would have the answer to that question.Like Jennifer said, it comes down to how the break up happened, how spiteful your wife/SO is, and how far she is willing to go with it. It's one of those chances we take when we bring anyone into the knowledge of our CDing. Even Friends will turn on you and use it.

[Rachelakld]

My ex (some 9 years ago) still has not outed me, even through she had a hard time with me leaving her.
We all have secrets, I suppose if I released one of hers, she would probably retaliate and out me, but we both know that any secrets released, effects out daughter

[RADER]

My first Wife spread all kinds of rumors and stories about me wanting to wear girdles
at the time. It hurt, but i got through it.
Very few believed her, she was known as a big mouth.
She did make my two kids hate me, and estrange me, know for over 22 years.
Rader

[Mink]

going beyond just GFs into the realm of femme friends / sister / etc...

the first gal I ever told in 2003 later ended up telling everyone on my fave online music message board... THAT pissed me off!

and later was very nasty even years later ! I think way later in 2010 she even called me a Transvestite Freakshow

:(

very baaaad....


then another gal who was a really bad friend would tell random people I had just met like her cousin that I was a CDer...

so much for first impressions!


and one gal I dated also told personal stuff about our relationship after it ended online to one guy who really hated me ... and that made me very mad / disappointed

and my sister would bring up things in the heat of mad moments to my parents...



so yeah... not too much good luck with women in regards to keeping my secret / not trying to embarrass me out of anger... going too dang far!

strangely next to no MEN have betrayed me like this!

so I have a bit of a chip on my shoulder in terms of trusting females with this!