'Do' her or 'Be' her - What is our first thought upon seeing a beautiful woman? [Archive] - Crossdressers.com - #1 Community & Forum for Crossdressers, Family and Friends

Ms. Donna

01-29-2006, 06:35 AM

There is a thread running over in the Lounge forum called You know your a real tranny when... And I found Miriannah's answer quite interesting:

These really are true for me: (some may have been said, oh well)

1) When you see attractive women and instead of thinking "I'd love to 'get with' her" you think "I'd love to be her."

2) When get talking to actual girls about beauty tips, clothing, shoes, etc and end up actually knowing more than they do.

3) When your male wardrobe sucks, but you don't care because you're more interested in building your female wardrobe.

4) When you look at your body and think "what is the point of body hair? It needs to disappear forever."
For me personally, I've experienced #2 in certain circumstances, #3 is pretty on track and #4 is just a given. But it's point #1 that I want to explore.

When all of this came to a head for me several years ago, I was in a place mentally where for nearly every woman I would pass on the street, I would vacillate between wanting to 'do' and 'be' her. I found the experience quite disorienting. I'm well past feeling 'disoriented' by any of this and have found that my first 'feelings' upon seeing an attractive women are very much on the 'be her' side of the fence.

I'll take note of nearly everything about her - clothes, hair, walk, etc - all of it in a very non sexual way. Then that feeling pops back up and I imaging 'being' her - living as this other 'woman'. And it's not like I don't find them sexually attractive - I often do :o - but more often than not, that thought just never makes it through. Even the times I've been with a group of guys and one of them comments (usually something crass) on an attractive women, they'll be going on about how hot she is and "gettin' some" with her.

Me??? I'm imagining getting up, getting dressed & primped and going out into the world - as her.

So girls... Do her or Be her - What's your first (and possibly stronger) feeling?

Love & Stuff,
Donna

ronda

01-29-2006, 06:53 AM

GypsyKaren

01-29-2006, 07:16 AM

Jasmine Ellis

01-29-2006, 07:29 AM

Lilith Moon

01-29-2006, 08:01 AM

Always my first reaction...to be her.

The more good looking she is the more I want to look like her, to be dressed just as prettily. By "good looking" I mean how well she dresses, how her particular taste in clothes appeals to me. Inherent beauty is important to me as well, but it is the clothes that initially attract my attention, then I start to notice the other stuff..face, hair, poise etc.

Whatever, my underlying urge is always to look like the person I'm looking at, to be in clothes like she is wearing, to have hair like her and so on.

Sometimes, I have had an impulse to actually ask somebody were she got that lovely skirt, or gorgeous top from. I never have actually done that, though, because I can guess how scary it would be for a male stranger to start asking a woman about her clothes.

ErikaLeigh

01-29-2006, 08:07 AM

In my younger years I used to get the 2 confused, But now I would say BE HER. Although I would have to say more like LOOK LIKE HER. I have a lot of respect for GGs, and just love to see a beautiful woman dressed to the 9s, or even dressed down if its done right (not looking sloppy). It gives me inspiration.

Tina Dixon

01-29-2006, 08:24 AM

Why not both?

AprilMae

01-29-2006, 10:06 AM

Do her is first. Along with I'd love to try on that outfit.

Ms. Donna

01-29-2006, 10:12 AM

First of all, I gotta say that I'm not exactly thrilled with this thread, but to each their own. It just doesn't seem very "ladylike" to me.

When I look at a beautiful woman, it's just for fashion tips. I don't want to be her, I'm happy being myself.

GypsyKaren

I wasn't looking to offend anyone and perhaps I could have titled the thread better. It isn't about not being happy being oneself, but about the nature of one's thoughts and feelings – and how they change - with regards to what is basically sexual attraction.

When a man finds a woman attractive, I suspect that his first thought is not “Wow! Look at her! I'd love to discuss globalization and it's impact on world economics!” This does not imply that mentally he has 'had his way with her' either. Attraction - sexual attraction, in all animals, has at it's core a drive for procreation and humans are no different. What does set us apart is our ability to acknowledge and process these 'base' drives and control how it is we act on them. We are not slaves to our instincts. We take these more base drives, process them through our network of experiences and arrive at a socially acceptable way of expressing them – and fantasy is one of those ways. (This is not limited to just men – women have fantasies as rich – if not richer and deeper – as men.)

I have found - in general - that CD & TG males (and probably females as well – I've just not had the opportunity to speak with any) seem to undergo a paradigm shift with regards to our reaction to sexual attraction. Where in the past we might have sublimated the procreative drive through innocent sexual fantasy, many now have fantasies of actually being the woman to whom they are attracted - to experience life as they do. It's not out of a 'dislike' for oneself, but out of an admiration for the other. It's not unlike watching an athelete you admire and 'wishing' you could be like them – imagining yourself as them, being able to do what they do.

The shift seems to coincide with our self acceptance. I had convinced myself that I was a 'regular guy' and consequently interpreted the world based on that paradigm. I can't recall never looking at woman and imagining 'being her' until I really started to come to terms with who I was. I came to see 'women', as a class of people, more as my 'peers' as opposed to a group from which I was set apart. Others with whom I've spoken have related similar experiences – the more they acknowledge and accept who they are, the less 'sexual' these thoughts seem to be.

LovableTJO said “Why not both?” They're both still there, just the balance has been tipped a bit.

Like I said, it's not about disliking oneself. Fantasy is an important part of what makes us who we are and IMHO, to a large extent is a motivating force behind why we do what we do – to make the fantasy a reality.

All the above is in general and I'm quit sure that your mileage will vary – a lot. :)

Love & Stuff,
Donna

Angela Burke

01-29-2006, 10:27 AM

Well I would definitely not want to "be her".
If she was wearing an outfit I admired I would be thinking "I wonder how I would look in that?".
As for wanting to "do her", (I object to that unfortunate term), that would depend if I was sexually attracted to her or not.
I'm afraid I've never conformed to the popular idea that I should have sex (or rather pretend to my male peers that I desire to have sex) with every woman I see.
I don't want to jump into bed with every woman I see, there are actually (gasp!) some women I just don't fancy.
But then again there are some that I do!

Nikki Dee

01-29-2006, 10:35 AM

1....wouldn't want to BE her...but maybe LIKE her.!
2....Yes, it has happened to me.
3....Male wardrobe doesn't suck...but much prefer my femme wardrobe.
4....Don't have body hair.!...never did see the point.
Nikki. x

Veronica E. Scott

01-29-2006, 11:09 AM

To Do Her Or To Be Her That is the question?

Well for me to be her no but to be with her yes. Who knowes what her life is like it could really suck.But to be with her and develope a friendship and maybe share wardrobes now that would be a dream come true and Do her in the end.

Shannah

01-29-2006, 11:27 AM

My sexual attraction is the first thing I notice. I guess that I'm in the minority here, in that I'm happy having my male counterpart to offset my feminine side. Even though I don't want to be a woman, I would like to be able to try it for a few days. When I dress, I tend to emulate what I find attractive. So, when I see a beautiful woman, after my sexual thoughts pass, I sometimes wonder what it would be like to walk in her shoes. Especially if they're sexy heels.:D

jennifer easton

01-29-2006, 11:32 AM

I'm a be her, when the girly mag get passed around at work, they all talk of doin, and me right in there with'em ,but inside I'm thinkin, man what I would'nt give to be her!!!!xoxoxJennifer

Helen MC

01-29-2006, 11:34 AM

More "BE" her than "do" her.

As an example I went out today for lunch with some friends. A very attractive woman of my age group came in dressed in brown corduroy trousers, boots, jumper. She had on a nice pair of pale blue panties as the waistband stuck up over that of her trousers as she bent over to get her handbag off the floor. Although she was past the first blush of youth she had obviously looked after herself well and was in very good shape. I found her arousing but NOT in the meaning of wanting sex with her but more how I would love to have her clothing, and the figure to wear it like her.

Imogen_Mann

01-29-2006, 12:33 PM

The type of woman I'd like to 'be', and the type I'd like to 'be in bed with', are very different, so it's not something that happens to me. One type is "be her" and the other "do her", and never the twain shall meet.

XX

Jayme

KellyT

01-29-2006, 12:40 PM

ReginaK

01-29-2006, 01:08 PM

1. I don't think that about beautiful women because I know I have less than a snowball's chance at looking that good. I think that way about the mediocre women though. :o

2. That's happened a few times. I can remember advising a few girls on how to get off fake nails, how to dry nails faster, or how to stuff a bra.

3. That's definitely true. I've ceased caring too much for my male clothes. Just give me some jeans and a decent looking shirt and i'm happy.

4. Most definitely.

Michelle8

01-29-2006, 01:11 PM

More And More I Look At Girls And I Want to
Be Her.I Look At What She's Wearing ,How She Carries
Herself.I Wish i Was Her.

Gwen

01-29-2006, 01:30 PM

Donna,
I think I get what you are saying. I have noticed that I don't appear to look at GGs the same way most "straight" guys (non crossdressers) "express" themselves. I would have to qualify whether the "straight guy" was acting out for the benefit of other "straight guys" or if he was actually representing his feelings. As a straight crossdresser I obviously have a skewed perspective. Or maybe that's the very point of this thread. I do have a more tamed way of looking at women and am offended when guys "act out" toward women in a crewd fashion. I've always considered this one of a crossdressers sellable traits. I think our insight into a woman's fashion makes us a bit more (for give me if this is a bit Cliché-ish) "refined" in our perspective of women. I just wish more GG women were "geared" to appreciate that.

joni-alice

01-29-2006, 01:37 PM

Gee, guess I'd be wondering if she'd do me.
hugs,
j-a:cool:

Amelie

01-29-2006, 01:50 PM

Gee, guess I'd be wondering if she'd do me.
hugs,
j-a:cool:

Ha, this is what I would think as well. I would wonder if the other person would do me. lol

Cool avatar Joni, I like it.

TaraB

01-29-2006, 01:57 PM

i'm always one wanting to be her. Ever since i was a young kid when i'd see a beautiful woman i always would be thinking to myself "god i wish i was her" almost in a jealous sence.

Amelie

01-29-2006, 02:04 PM

Sorry for the double post, but here is my answer.

1) I don't want in any way to "do" a woman.

2) I already am a woman so I don't really have the desire to look like another woman that I might encounter on the streets.

When I was young, I admired the punk girls on how they did their make-up.

Shelly Preston

01-29-2006, 02:11 PM

TaraB

01-29-2006, 02:15 PM

Sorry for the double post, but here is my answer.

When I was young, I admired the punk girls on how they did their make-up.

me too. i went through so many fazes. When i was real young(4 to 10) i would just pick up on whatever was available or whatever my female friends wore. When the whole mass media/MTVthing 1st hit in the early 80's i was torn. I hated the music on MTV..i liked punk/metal but the new wave girls and the likes of Madonna/etc i loved. I never liked the whole metal chick thing which was more the look you'd see on girls who liked Poison. I'd dress more punk and new wave. Of course i went threw fazes when you are younger. The great thing is once you go through those fazes you start to realize....i can dress punk one day and new waveish the next and the next day i can dress more normal. The thing i love about fashion is how fun it can be.

Amelie

01-29-2006, 02:23 PM

me too. i went through so many fazes. When i was real young(4 to 10) i would just pick up on whatever was available or whatever my female friends wore. When the whole mass media/MTVthing 1st hit in the early 80's i was torn. I hated the music on MTV..i liked punk/metal but the new wave girls and the likes of Madonna/etc i loved. I never liked the whole metal chick thing which was more the look you'd see on girls who liked Poison. I'd dress more punk and new wave. Of course i went threw fazes when you are younger. The great thing is once you go through those fazes you start to realize....i can dress punk one day and new waveish the next and the next day i can dress more normal. The thing i love about fashion is how fun it can be.

Punk one day, new wavish the next and "more normal" on others????

I always thought punk was a normal style of dress. lol

Yea, I was more ounk than new wavish or "new romantic", then as punks(me) got older, some of us became goths.

TaraB

01-29-2006, 02:28 PM

Punk one day, new wavish the next and "more normal" on others????

I always thought punk was a normal style of dress. lol

Yea, I was more ounk than new wavish or "new romantic", then as punks(me) got older, some of us became goths.

hehe ya true....by normal i meant the type of girl who maybe dressed according to fashion standards alone...ie when Clueless came out....remember all the short schoolgirl skirts and thigh high look that was so popular....that wasn't a style generate by music....i shouldn't call it normal but that was the only word i could come up for it....i guess trendy would have been better.

i've always admired the goth look but never ventured there...mostly because i'm kinda clueless on how to achieve it.

eleventhdr

01-29-2006, 02:29 PM

I have been in places and situations where i have seen just very beatiful women and yeah the very frist quick male reaction is yeah i would like to do her. But then a secondary reaction kicks in and i am thinking i would rather be her then do her. And perhaps that is from condtionming One studying what women are really like how they really are inside. And anyway the thrid just might be that to be done would be far more satisfactory then to ever do a women I think this to might influence me to want to be a women to be able to finally be on the receiving end of all of those aspects of being female as well it does seem that in that regard women do have it all over us poor old males indeed. Oh well But to just finally be her oh my! oh my!. Suzy!

KateW

01-29-2006, 08:22 PM

When it's a woman I find attractive, my first thoughts are to "do her". If she isn't my type, I am more likely to wish I had the opportunity to wear what she was wearing, or be her, dependent on what she looks like.

it certainly keeps things interesting!!!

Debbie Kong

01-29-2006, 08:46 PM

I lean toward the "Be her" side. I don't like the "Do her" term anyway. Do me I can deal with. Do a me a female bee.

Debbie Thourogood Kong

Teal

01-29-2006, 10:27 PM

I just fantasize about being her. Absolutely jealous and want to be that beautiful woman. But, I could "do her" too. It's wierd, I need to be her and do her as a beautiful woman. OMG, I want to be a lesbian, I guess.

pauleen

01-29-2006, 10:32 PM

Okay ,
here is my 2 cents I would look at her for tips ,and would want to be with her only if she would accept my other half .

trisha_anne

01-29-2006, 10:34 PM

I also tend to lean towards "be her". Expescially if its a gorgeous women like Catherine Zeta Jones. I think about her alot. If I could be any women it would be her. But that is kind of off topic.

KathrynW

01-29-2006, 10:38 PM

To Do Her Or To Be Her, That is the question?
For me it would be more like...
I admire her and want to wear her clothes...;)

joanlynn28

01-29-2006, 10:46 PM

No doubt about it I would want to be her. As for everything else in your post I concur to all of the above.

Deanna2

01-29-2006, 10:50 PM

Lately I've been in this same quandry. When I look at a GG I find myself as often as not looking at the clothes and admiring them. I thought I must be getting old, but I reconcile myself by saying that now I am admiring the whole picture, not just part of it. Some GG's can wear anything and look gorgeous. Others wear fabulous clothes that make the wearer look great. Then there is the 'other' category.

Helana

01-29-2006, 11:20 PM

heather_nouveau

01-29-2006, 11:20 PM

Be her...

Almost constantly in my thoughts!

Heather

Deborah

01-30-2006, 12:25 AM

Hehe i finally made a thread (You know your a real tranny when..) that brought something worth talking about.:D

oh and BE her definantly.

uknowhoo

01-30-2006, 12:35 AM

Thanks for the thread Donna. ;)

Helana, I think you make a pretty good point about our appreciation of women and fidelity. I know it's the case for me.

Tammi

Michelle2008

01-30-2006, 01:02 AM

This is very interesting. I worked a job 5 yrs ago for a huge Health Insurance company and was pretty much friends with everyone around me in adjoining cubicles. The walls that separated our little work areas/cubicles were high enough to keep our work private but we could see above them easily. Well, 2-3 times a week a young very attractive woman came to our work area to drop off reports or pick up documents. It soon became public knowledge that I would stop doing my work and just gawk at this woman. It got to the point when she came to our work area, everyone around me would stop doing their work and watch me watching her. It was very funny. Everyone around me assumed I was always gawking at her b/c I wanted "to do her." The truth was...this young petite woman was always dressed in the cutest skirts and dresses. Her hair was always styled so nice, she smelled great, her finger nails were always nicely groomed/manicured...always with a different nail polish each week. She wore the cutest high heels and stockings....
Well, my point is...I allowed everyone to think I was supposely thinking I wanted "to do her" but in reality I wanted to "be her" in the worst way. I wanted to show up to work everyday looking just as cute as her!

Michelle

dani_grl03

01-30-2006, 01:13 AM

I will keep this short,
I usually think first, How lucky she is. And then I wish I could have been that lucky to have been in the right body to begin with. And then I wish I could blink my eyes and change bodies with her.

LisaMariaCD

01-30-2006, 01:26 AM

Wow, I think about this alot, too. It has definitely become "be her", although "do her" does creep in from time to time.

Helen MC

01-30-2006, 02:21 AM

Yes Shelly, when I have used the phrase " I'd like to get into her knickers" I mean it literally not metaphorically as most men would do. I actually fullfilled my wish one time when I helped an attractive female co-worker by installing a shower in her bathroom and swapped a pair of my pale blue "Sloggi" briefs for a similar pair of hers and wore them, so I DID "get into her knickers" and enjoyed doing so.

Diann

01-30-2006, 03:05 AM

Why not both?

Dose that mean you want to do your self? love?

:angel: Diann

Stacy Reso

01-30-2006, 06:07 AM

when i see an attractive girl i usually think about being her first as in having her legs,clothes, hair etc for instance i saw an atrracitve girl yesterday and thought those lega are so nice and and she is a beauttiful shape i wish i was her and my mate said to me "i would love to have her clothes on ym floor" as in sex i thought to my self iwant to her clothes on my floor becuase i wanna waer them

Barbara B

01-30-2006, 06:13 AM

I must say this brought a smile to my face when I read the title.

The first thing I usually notice is the poise and fashion sense of any woman.
Thinking if only I could look that good.

Some of my work colleagues always make the rather vulgar comment when seeing an attractive woman.

" I would not mind getting into her knickers "

Are they thinking the same as me ??????

I quite often go off to lunch when at work with a GG friend who is married and knows all about Barb, a lot of my work mates think I'm trying to "get in her knickers" and as I said to her "if only they knew". Barb x

jo_ann

01-30-2006, 06:39 AM

this thread is great, I thought I was the only one that thought like this. you know how most guys say "when I look at a girl it's either: I'd do her, or I'd want to be friends".. to me I think exactly like: "I'd do her or I'd want to be her".. rarely it's both, but honestly I think these two ways... like I'll be looking at a woman and saying to myself "no no.. I don't want to sleep with you, can I... just borrow your body for a day or two?"

KathrynW

01-30-2006, 09:25 AM

The truth was...this young petite woman was always dressed in the cutest skirts and dresses. Her hair was always styled so nice, she smelled great, her finger nails were always nicely groomed/manicured...always with a different nail polish each week. She wore the cutest high heels and stockings....

When I'm out with my (supportive) GF, it's sometimes quite humorous, because when I see certain girls in public, I've been know to make comments to her like...
"absolutely fabulous shoes" "great nails" "very cool skirt" or something like that... It's kind of like an inside joke between just us when I say stuff like this. She says I'm crazy, because she almost never notices things like other women's shoes, etc. ;)

pattied

01-30-2006, 10:21 AM

I want to be her....

Whenever I see a woman on the street, in the office, subway, or most anywhere, my first thoughts are critiques of her outfit, and makeup. I tend to examine shoes, make up and eyebrow shapes more than anything else, with the outfit very closely behind.

Numbers 3 and 4 definately apply to me. With respect to number 2, only the first half applies as I am still learning about make up styles and applications.

MsJanessa

01-30-2006, 12:28 PM

Why not both?
ditto

Deborah

01-30-2006, 03:34 PM

When I'm out with my (supportive) GF, it's sometimes quite humorous, because when I see certain girls in public, I've been know to make comments to her like...
"absolutely fabulous shoes" "great nails" "very cool skirt" or something like that... It's kind of like an inside joke between just us when I say stuff like this. She says I'm crazy, because she almost never notices things like other women's shoes, etc. ;)

So it seems you've started accepting yourself finally hmm? ;)

KathrynW

01-30-2006, 03:40 PM

So it seems you've started accepting yourself finally hmm? ;)
What???

Isabel1970

01-30-2006, 03:55 PM

I know sometimes when I look at women out and about I will think about what it would be like to wear what they are wearing, particularly sexy office wear. I can't say for sure what that means. I've never had a girlfriend, so that might be a factor.

It's strange I remember going out for a dinner with work and really fancing a woman from our office, although I knew she was going out with another bloke from work. I knew there was no way I could be with her, so I imagined wearing her outfit, which was a gorgeous little black dress with a small slit on one thigh. I suppose I feel I can't be with a woman so I want to be her. Weird.

Sarahgurl371

01-30-2006, 07:43 PM

All of this leads to an interesting end point. Since we are not as trigger happy as the regular guys as we often want to wear the girls pants rather than jump into them, then in general CDs make for more faithful partners than regular guys. Simply put, we don't see beautiful women as a target sport for opportunistic sex, but rather we admire them for their skill and aptitude in presenting a beautiful figure. Our partners need not worry that our wandering eye means we are tempted to cheat on them as we are only observing.

One of the main reasons this forum is so civilised is because we typically abhor talk of women as sexual objects because to denigrate them in such a fashion would be to denigrate ourselves.

I have never cheated on any girlfriend and I cannot foresee myself ever contemplating it as my emotional ties to my partner are paramount to me. I wonder if my experience is typical of other CDs?

Helana, Very nice post. I would say that I feel much the same as you.

As far as the question for me - I just think to myself how I would love to be able to look like her. There may be some physical attraction, but I have to agree with Helana again, I need an emotional connection for physical intimacy.

Guys I work with are always looking at pictures or the GG's around and say all kinds of crude sexual things. Myself, I am always just thinking WOW, I wish I could experience life like her. But of course you can't say that in public!

tammie

01-30-2006, 07:55 PM

Hi Everyone: I am appearantly still a man inside despite my love of all things feminine. When I see a beautiful young woman, my first thought is how much I would love to please her intimately. I would prefer more to satisfy her than myself if only one choice. Then I amuse myself by trying to examine her lingerie and determine if I have anything similar. Sometimes I see very pretty young hot women and they have on such trashy lingerie, or worse yet unsexy cotten white panties HO HUM.

HaleyPink2000

01-30-2006, 08:23 PM

1) When you see attractive women and instead of thinking "I'd love to 'get with' her" you think "I'd love to be her." Yeah I do sometimes wish I was a Woman. Then there are times I am glad I'm not also. Confused? I am! LOL
2) When get talking to actual girls about beauty tips, clothing, shoes, etc and end up actually knowing more than they do. Yeah, for the most part I do know as much or more than most.
3) When your male wardrobe sucks, but you don't care because you're more interested in building your female wardrobe. My Girl Clothes are loads nicer than my Male clothes and out number them.
4) When you look at your body and think "what is the point of body hair? It needs to disappear forever." Nope, I don't need to do anything but shave my face lightly, I'm lucky in that area.

MelissaL

01-31-2006, 01:11 AM

Ok on the list 1,3 and 4, #2 occasionally it happens. I see an attractive woman and the first thing I notice is the outfit,or hair or make-up. I think "wish I could look like her". I like being me just wish I could be 10 years younger and female hehehe

Melissa

Ashley Allison

01-31-2006, 02:30 AM

All of the above, but my sexual attraction towards beautiful women is definately very strong. I'm a mixed bag of gender envy and lust.

mskilmer

01-31-2006, 05:32 AM

OK ... L'll admit it ... I'm a "do her". This is not to say that I don't often look at women for fashion tips, etc. ... of course I do. I guess it comes down to the fact that I CAN try to be her whenever I want ... but I'll likely never "get with" her. "Being her" is fully within my own realm of control. The latter is not ... therein lies the allure of fantasy.

Lilith Moon

01-31-2006, 08:47 AM

I have never cheated on any girlfriend and I cannot foresee myself ever contemplating it as my emotional ties to my partner are paramount to me. I wonder if my experience is typical of other CDs?

This certainly applies to me. I need an emotional attachment before I could even contemplate physical sex. I wonder if this is another trait common to most of us ?

TGMarla

01-31-2006, 08:51 AM

The question is a little crude, but since I know what it is you're getting at, I'll answer. Since I think both thoughts, I guess you want to know which one comes at me first. Well, it's about half and half. Sometimes I look with lust first, and sometimes I think with envy first. But I usually have both thoughts within a few moments. It also depends on how she's dressed. When she's wearing a nice dress or a skirt, my thoughts tend to move towards envy first, and lust second.

Dawnna

01-31-2006, 09:18 AM

Absolute envy! My first thought is always "boy, I'd love to look like that". Of course at my age it's always women 40 yo or less who draw my eye.

InHerShoes

01-31-2006, 10:13 AM

Absolute envy!

I find myself thinking "I wish I could wear that and pull it off so well" or "damn I wish i could look like that when I walk" so I guess I'm a look like her on #1 and a yes on 4 - as for giving out makeup tips? Maybe in clown school :p

KarenNY

01-31-2006, 10:18 AM

Interesting thoughts...

I have to confess that my initial first thought when seeing an attractive woman is -- and I'm totally serious: "Gosh I want that outfit!" Then I start wondering how her clothes and hairstyle would look on me...

I have done this since at least junior high school -- seen an attractive girl in pretty clothes, and daydreamed about switching clothes with her. Sometimes I would go home, tell my mother (who was accepting and supportive) about the dress or outfit a girl was wearing, and we might go shopping and find something like it in a store.

To this day I still look at outfits and dresses on particular women, even in church, I'm embarrassed to say...

Sam-antha

01-31-2006, 12:09 PM

.. get it right. We may want to be like her, appearance, clothing, poise etc. then sometimes there is sheer envy, (jealousy) i want...How can someone possibly behave like that... I do not mean models, I mean.. just women..
but doing.... noooo. if we must stretch it to be done like her, but then we do not know do we ?

Paula Blair

01-31-2006, 12:31 PM

Originally Posted by Miriannah
These really are true for me: (some may have been said, oh well)

1) When you see attractive women and instead of thinking "I'd love to 'get with' her" you think "I'd love to be her."

I would not necessarily want to "be" her. After all, if I have simply seen her have not known her (in the non-biblical sense), how would I have any idea what her personality and life experiences have been? But, I have often seen attractive women and though how wonderful it would be to have her body. This is pure fantasy, because even were I to go all the way to reassignment, I would never be attractive.

2) When get talking to actual girls about beauty tips, clothing, shoes, etc and end up actually knowing more than they do.

I have to say that this has never happened to me. If I were a woman, I would probably never use makeup, nail polish, etc. When I dress now, I have to use enough makeup to cover my beard shadow, but I dislike having to wear the stuff.

3) When your male wardrobe sucks, but you don't care because you're more interested in building your female wardrobe.

I have never cared much for my male wardrobe. At the moment my female wardrobe is limited, and I do hope to build it as the budget allows.

4) When you look at your body and think "what is the point of body hair? It needs to disappear forever."

Absolutely! I am one of those cursed individuals with hair everywhere except the top of my head. In my highschool yearbook, I was voted "Class Caveman". Fortunately, I have been able to begin lasar treatments on my chest and back.

Bonnie D

01-31-2006, 01:40 PM

What has always attracted my eye was the physical beauty of a girl/woman, what she was wearing and how she carried herself, and if I was close enough, her scent, then I would wonder what she was wearing underneath. I would then wish that I was the girl/woman I should have been and would envy the person who attracted my attention. Of course I knew nothing about the person I was looking at so I wouldn't want to actually be her, just who I should have been and hoped I was as attractive. I never wanted to "do" them.

Bonnie

Sam-antha

01-31-2006, 03:12 PM

BonniD, Envy is the word I looked for. How I would love to be looked at in the way that I look at a stunning woman.

calliekat

01-31-2006, 06:01 PM

Get her to ecstasy, and ask for her clothes.

Miriannah

01-31-2006, 07:44 PM

Wow, a half-joking quote of mine spawned a 3-pager? :o

Anyway, (since I was the one that said it) for me it's not a "be her literally" so much as "I'd love to look like her right now, with that outfit on." Above everything else, I'd much rather be myself than someone else, but every now and then, just for awhile, it'd be fun to look like that ultra-feminine someone else. ^^

Too bad Washington (at least where I currently live) has been gradually spiralling downward on the evolutionary totem pole, so I find myself thinking that less and less. My state is slowly getting supersized. :(

Absolutely! I am one of those cursed individuals with hair everywhere except the top of my head. In my highschool yearbook, I was voted "Class Caveman". Fortunately, I have been able to begin lasar treatments on my chest and back.
Ouch, that sucks. :( I don't have it to that degree, as my chest & back are spotless, my lower arms are kind of fuzzy, and my face has an upper lip & slight chin shadow thanks to dark hair. My legs though...ugh! Way too fuzzy, probably in part due to past shavings. My leg & pubic hair is what I'd like to see gone the most. :o

Deborah

01-31-2006, 07:50 PM

Too bad Washington (at least where I currently live) has been gradually spiralling downward on the evolutionary totem pole, My state is slowly getting supersized. :(

HAHA you too hmmm? I thought Washington was a liberal state. Naw only for gays and lesbians.

Miriannah

01-31-2006, 08:01 PM

HAHA you too hmmm? I thought Washington was a liberal state. Naw only for gays and lesbians.
Part depends on the area, with Seattle probably being your best bet for a highly-liberal population. As for me, my little suburban area seems to be getting overrun by 8-kid military families with at least 6 vehicles per driveway, at least 3 of which are SUvs with american flags and pro-bush bumper stickers. :(

carson

01-31-2006, 08:10 PM

I'd say 90% of the time if an attractive woman catches my eye I want to "do" her. The other 10% I want to be/dress like her. I love the femnine form and wish to emulate it. But I am a man in my soul.

Lissa Stevens

01-31-2006, 09:29 PM

Sometimes I think about her in a sexual way but mostly it's, "Gosh I would love to be her"!!
As far as fidelity. You can always look, we all do just don't touch if you are already taken.

Khriss

01-31-2006, 11:33 PM

...o'course I'm on the left (top) ...right (bottom) ...whatever ...:rolleyes: :bs: xx"K"

Danielle

02-01-2006, 01:17 AM

I work at a party store and I see women all day,the only thing I wish I could do is have each and every woman ask me if I want her stockings:D heels and if they have a garter belt that's the cherry on top:clap: I enjoy crossdressing because I enjoy admiring every extent of a women's body:yrtw: .I fully respect all women especially the ones who dont leave home without a garter belt and stockings:cool: Women who dont use lingerie are boring.:violin:

genevieve

02-01-2006, 01:34 AM

am happy with who i am, dress like her perhaps, fine clothing like her perhaps, sexy walk like her for sure! but it all boils down to how do i become the best me, my wardrobe, my walk, my scent and my wolf whistles from construction men, hee hee just joking about the ladder, i mean latter, it is all about you and how you feel hon!

Ms. Donna

02-01-2006, 06:53 AM

...o'course I'm on the left (top) ...right (bottom) ...whatever ...:rolleyes: :bs: xx"K"

That made my morning! ;)

Love & Stuff,
Donna

pammiecd

02-01-2006, 04:57 PM

My wife acused me of ogling a couple women at the bar one night, and was pretty upset. I assured her that I was not admiring them, I was admiring their clothes!

Bridget

02-01-2006, 07:57 PM

Not sure. I often think that i would love to be able to pull off that look, but i wouldn't necessarily want to be her. A penis, and associated gear, does has it's upsides, sometimes.

MaylinJane

02-01-2006, 10:06 PM

I'm pretty much in the "be her" camp. I've rarely looked at a woman sexually.

May

NatalieBliss

02-05-2006, 01:08 PM

For me if it's not both it's neither...
______

I have nothing but respect and admiration for feminity and the above statement is made in that vain.

Nlenro-nu2

02-05-2006, 02:36 PM

i am like you i look at woman and my first tought is man i would like to look like her long leg small waist just right boobs. wow is that sexy. so i guess iam a be her not that i want to be anything other then myself :D

Yes I Nlenro-nu think like you do however I don't mind being myself except for the times I were put in the Psych Hospital because some dullard normal said that My Psych wasn't normal. I was on pills for sometime and I'm glad I'm off them now and most of the effects of Risperdol, Zoralox, Chloropromozene and Seroquel are wearing off. So I'm almost back to the way I was before the drugs... Thanks to a letter I came across in a binder from the Mayo Clinic I can stay off those darn pills. Well I'm 56 now.. and lots of my live was wasted in a dullard perceived to be normal state but I was anything but normal then. I wasn't happy so I didn't bother making friends. I became a bookworm to get through the day.. Every where I went I had a book with me. Then oneday I came across a Transexual Reassignment book in a library. I looked at it! It reminded me of my real self! So for awhile I was back to the Closet CD state. Now I'm sorta partially closet CD but I do occasionally ride the city transit as a female no one says anything unless I use my bus pass and then The Driver usually says something I wouldn't have know it was you without your pass!
I don't look great as a female but it's an Ok look. I however do think my female look is better than my Male look but I might be prejudice here cause I think much of Male appearance is ugly. Well most people that know me can recognize me no matter what I wear! Many just have the attitude... If it's you do it. Some minority that think their the majority say stick with the medical assigned gender. I don't like the minority advice. Doctors can't really be blame they are taught to do things a certain way if they are to get paid. A Diagnosis is nothing more than an Educated Guess. I know myself far better than any doctor. I know far better whats best for me. I know some say the answer is not what's best for me but what's best for society... Well society would be far richer if they allowed all us Cd'ers our freedom to live and dress as we want!
Oh I may be a great speller but I've flunked at punctuation.. Punctuation is as confusing as Algebra! By the way I hate nit pickers that pick on such minor things. As long as the message gets through correctly is all I care about!
Try.. www.swapandsave.com (http://www.swapandsave.com) get some clothes without putting out cash!

Kimberley

02-05-2006, 03:31 PM

I have always just wanted to be me... the question is who or what am I? I think many of my male traits were forcibly learned while even greater forces subdued my female side.

When a GG "attractive" or otherwise catches my attention I am first intrigued. I view her as another human being with all the attributes any of us have. It is after that I wonder who she is, what are her values etc. My final thoughts are always whether she could understand me.

Somewhere in between I look at her figure and perhaps wish I had it. I look at her clothes and wonder if I were her would I wear them, then I give my head a shake. Reality check. I am not her nor will I ever be.

Sexual attraction? I have only ever been with one GG in my life. I have turned down "offers" from many others. So would I want to be with her? No. Do I want to be her? No.

Damn I am one confused individual.:bs:

Kimberly

02-05-2006, 04:27 PM

oh dear god, all of what you said is true.

I have tried to make my male side fashionable, but male clothes just aren't as great as female clothes. :(

And the first thing I do when seeing a GG for the first time is to scan what their wearing; usually, what follows is attraction - and it's scary, because most of the time it depends on what they're wearing.

Sedona

02-06-2006, 11:15 AM

Hmmm,

100% of the time: Do her.

Good question. although I hate the phrase "do her," when I've seen a gorgeous woman, I can't think of ever having thought, "I'd like to be her" rather than "do her."

I guess I'm just wired like that. I've never had a desire to be a woman, but I do of course admire nice clothing, and have had thoughts of the gorgeous woman's clothing in a size XL.

That said, been a CDer for a lifetime, and can't see ever wanting to change.

Cheers.

PattiL

02-06-2006, 11:26 AM

Definately 'be her'.

maid phylis

02-06-2006, 02:24 PM

There is a thread running over in the Lounge forum called You know your a real tranny when... And I found Miriannah's answer quite interesting:

For me personally, I've experienced #2 in certain circumstances, #3 is pretty on track and #4 is just a given. But it's point #1 that I want to explore.

When all of this came to a head for me several years ago, I was in a place mentally where for nearly every woman I would pass on the street, I would vacillate between wanting to 'do' and 'be' her. I found the experience quite disorienting. I'm well past feeling 'disoriented' by any of this and have found that my first 'feelings' upon seeing an attractive women are very much on the 'be her' side of the fence.

I'll take note of nearly everything about her - clothes, hair, walk, etc - all of it in a very non sexual way. Then that feeling pops back up and I imaging 'being' her - living as this other 'woman'. And it's not like I don't find them sexually attractive - I often do :o - but more often than not, that thought just never makes it through. Even the times I've been with a group of guys and one of them comments (usually something crass) on an attractive women, they'll be going on about how hot she is and "gettin' some" with her.

Me??? I'm imagining getting up, getting dressed & primped and going out into the world - as her.

So girls... Do her or Be her - What's your first (and possibly stronger) feeling?

Love & Stuff,
Donna
dear donna i feel the same way and i agree on all issues ,especcially my wardrobe ,i have so much more dresses and skirts than i have mens clothing any more:D