How did you feel the 1st time you went out in public

[sarah555]

Taking the step of dressing up and heading out tomorrow but very nervous. Any tips, girls.

[Lori Kurtz]

Sexy. Excited beyond belief. Scared out of my mind.

I can't say how much of that might apply to you. CDing for me was always a very sexual activity, so that's why "sexy" came first; for most transsexuals, that would probably not be the case. And since my style was to create a feminine identity that was boldly and blatantly sexual, I was not trying to "blend in," and that heightened both the excitement and the fear.

That's just this one "girl's" response to your question. I'll be interested to see what others say.

Whatever your outing means to you, best of luck. Enjoy being who you are.

[Lorileah]

just like going to prom or on your first date or getting married. You think of a million things that could happen and it usually ends up a non event

[Jenniferathome]

Keep telling yourself that no one cares. It's true. If you skulk about, you draw attention. Behave as if you are in guy mode.

Now, while the above is true, you have to dress appropriately for the time of day, location, weather and your age if you do not want to draw attention to yourself.

[sarah555]

I am going to a bar with a female friend so thinking skirt blouse and short heels.

[BillieJoEllen]

The first time I went out I was VERY nervous and VERY scared not to mention VERY nervous. I only had a couple things go wrong but they weren't very major. The very first person to see me dressed was a man sitting up against a wall in the alley I was walking down in order to get to my car. I didn't see him until it was too late to turn around. Seeing me didn't seem to phase him. I drove around town for quite awhile stopping every now and then to take a walk around a city block. On my last walk I was all of a sudden met by about seven teen girls. They were all gabby and not paying attention to me except for one. She stared daggers into me trying to figure out what she was looking at. I quickly turned around after I passed them and sure enough she was still looking at me.

All in all though it was a success. I tried shopping trips after that on various occasions with much success also.

[silhouette]

I felt like a goddamn rock star.
I was stuck in the lobby of the hotel for FORTY FIVE minutes with a long line of people waiting to take their picture with me one after another.

I think it was some kind of critical mass effect.. once it started everyone else wanted in.

[Cheryl T]

My first time I felt like a deer on the first day of hunting season. I thought for sure everyone would be watching me, staring, knowing and pointing fingers whispering.
After about an hour I realized they were all so busy with their own piece of the world and what they had to accomplish that they hardly noticed me. That calmed me some. What really set me at ease was a little while later when we attended our 2nd Tri-Ess meeting. At the end one of the girls stood up and said, "ok, who's going to the diner?". I thought what the heck and went along. We were treated like royalty by the staff and they made us feel so at ease.
That first step is the hardest. After that it's just one foot in front of the other, just like everyone else you'll see.

[Hell on Heels]

Hell-o Sarah,
Not knowing what your plans are, my advice for you would be just enjoy yourself.
Remember that most people out there are so busy doing their own thing and most won't even
give you any attention. Those that do are not out to make a big deal about you.they will see a
person enjoying life.
My first time out was to a mall, just walking through, stopping to look at a few things, no one cared.
Second trip, back to the mall met manager at Express, she helped me pick out some jeans, totally a pleasant
experience. 3rd time, meeting friends in SanFrancisco for drinks and dinner. Chatting with staff at each place, other patrons
as we waited for a table. It was amazing.
Biggest advice own it, and remember... No one cares!
Have fun!
Much Love,
Kristyn

[Joni T]

I was about as comfortable as a feline at an AKC convention.

[Tracii G]

Apprehensive, nervous all the normal things.
Once you do it you will see its not that big a deal.
Dress to blend is the key.
Don't go out dressed like a hooker and go to the city park at midnight.

[lucyxcd]

it felt so natural and right weirdly.. as i was expecting to be really paranoid. once the nerves are out the way just enjoy being you :)

[silhouette]

Apprehensive, nervous all the normal things.
Once you do it you will see its not that big a deal.
Dress to blend is the key.
Don't go out dressed like a hooker and go to the city park at midnight.

Dress to blend haha.
I am 6'4" and wore 6" heels.

Embrace and love yourself.

[Tracii G]

More power to you Haydee LOL

[Christie ann]

Sorry for the sports analogy, but remember in mid season when you are in about the best shape of the season. You know your position and know the plays, you are all prepared but right before the game you get that sick to the stomach nervousness that some how disappears as you get on the field. Yup, the same thing. Even now, all the prep, dressing just right for the venue, the drive over and that pit of the stomach feeling as you park and open the door. But, somehow, between the car and the destination, that same calmness settles in. You are prepared, you know what you are doing and by golly I just feel pretty today.
From all that I have read and heard, I didn't ask to be transgender but if that is what I am then I want to full advantage of my life, it's the only one I'll get.

[Felicia Dee]

I was maybe 19 so... Scared Sh*tless.

[amy101]

Go with a friend

[FirstTimeCD]

just get dressed and go out with confidence. just enjoy being yourself. I remember When I went out first time. I was little nervous but once I stepped out from my home I enjoyed that first outing. Just Do it.

[sarah555]

Good advice from all the ladies, thank you xx

[Rachael Leigh]

Nervious, excited and scared. It went well though and I did it in the daytime.
Once it was over it felt so amazing though and I knew I could do it again. Don't do it often but it's a blast

[S. Lisa Smith]

I felt much the same as many have stated. I like the way Leigh put it. The best thing for you to do is own it!!!!

[Kate Simmons]

I felt great. My only tip: Just be yourself and enjoy! :)

[Alice Torn]

Full of butterflies, but also fantastic, that i did it. At night from a motel, went to a grocery store, walked around my car some, then went to two gas stations, then drove back to the motel, but a bunch of young people were in the next room, and outside, and saw my lipstick, i am sure, asked me something, and talked for a minute. Then into the safety of my room. In Aberdeen Wash, small old city near the coast.2005 The next night, cop pulled me over dressed!

[Kandi Robbins]

Can't wait to hear how it goes! Planning to do the same later in the month.

[kimdl93]

Very nervous, but determined.

[Keri L]

My heart felt like it burst into flames, and I remembered that I was alive, for the first time in a long while.

I could feel electricity in the air, and I could glide, instead of having to walk.

It was life changing.

Cate

[Leslie Langford]

I am going to a bar with a female friend so thinking skirt blouse and short heels.

Sounds as if you already have a "wingman(woman)" to run interference for you, and that's 90% of the battle. Most of us who went out for the first time did so by ourselves, and we didn't have that particular safety net to fall back on. The feeling was as terrifying - yet exhilarating - as jumping off a cliff. The only difference is that we survived. You will too.

[Adriana Moretti]

Like everyone else...I was extremely nervous...I was going to a local CD event . I drove there, then got the willies, and got nervous, and spent the first half hour of the event sitting in my car trying to get the courage, to get out and walk thru the door. Then it dawned on me that i spent all this time getting ready, drove ALL the way there, and if I diddnt get out the car I would live to regret it. That thought inspired me to get out and go.....the minute I opened the door I was greeted right away by another CD pal who I became friendly with online, all my nerves dissapeared...and to this day I am STILL friends with her over 10 years later....I will never forget that moment....nothing went wrong......no biggie....

[CynthiaD]

I kept thinking my car was going to break down and I'd have to hitch hike in a skirt. It took a couple of times to get over the willies.

[Sc0rp10N]

I don't really do this to REALLY DO it. For me, it's kind of more of a costume thing. Oddly, I find myself really wondering what it would be like to push the envelope. So, once or twice at the old house, I went outside on the steps for a smoke and the two times I've dressed up at our new apartment, I've gone out on the balcony to smoke. The old place was really dark and I wasn't too worried, but the apartment balcony faces the cul-de-sac where 1000 cars come and go constantly, people are walking dogs, jogging, riding bikes, skateboarding, it's on the way to the basketball and tennis courts, even people going to the dumpster pass my balcony, including my neighbors, who I say hi to every single time I see them. Except those two nights. I hid behind the pillar. I want to push it, but not that much. I like the high, but a little high goes a long way for me. Maybe someday I'd like to take a drive and have my wife take a couple shots of us out somewhere, but not anywhere I'd be recognized. Sorry, too long, I'll quit now...

[flatlander_48]

Halloween 10-11 years ago...

They were showing The Rocky Horror Picture Show on the Cornell University campus BUT, you could get in FREE if you crossdressed! My friend (who would later become my 2nd wife) and I decided that we couldn't pass that up. So, we went to the theater, got in free, saw the movie and then drank and danced at a gay bar.

I was a little nervous on the way to the theater. All of the "what if I get stopped?", "what if the truck breaks down?", etc. thoughts were rolling around. However, by the time we got to the theater and my friend flashed the folks at the box office with her strap-on, it was downhill from there.

Anyway, relax and enjoy yourself!

[victoria76]

Very scary and exciting!

[Zooey]

The very first time I went out was a Halloween in Chicago in 1999, and I wore jeans and a hoodie because it was too damn cold, lol. I should have known then that I was TS as opposed to a CD...

The first time I went out for REAL into the real world, I was nervous, but also profoundly relieved to be myself. Nowadays when I go out, I'm just happy to be spending time (and often money) with friends. I'm not full-time yet, but my social life is pretty much exclusively en femme at this point.

[Lynn Marie]

I met another CD on this forum who lived about 40 minutes away. We visited at my apartment one afternoon and she offered to take me to a club she frequented. I went, and the rest is history. This life we lead is so much more fun with CD girlfriends. It makes everything so much easier.

[bridget thronton]

I suppose technically the first time I was dressed outside the house was for Halloween (nurse). Was many years later. I started dressing outside the house on other days - nervous is a good description, scarred is better.

[sarah555]

So tonight is the night ladies, nervous scared and excited at same time!

[Marcelle]

Sarah,

The thing to remember as others have said is that most people won't notice or if they do they will most likely keep their comments to themselves. Now I am a pragmatist as well so you will need some thick skin as it is not all high fives and chocolate cake out there in the Vanilla world. I am not saying it will be bad, but you should prepare yourself for some stares, a giggle or two and a few WTF looks. Naturally a lot of this depends on how well you blend. If you are smaller framed, have more feminine features, walk and move very femme and have a great femme voice . . . you will most likely not get a second glance. If you are larger, with strikingly guy features and a deep voice then you will get looks. We all do, it is a fact of going out. Now having said that, don't let it detract you from going out if you are ready as it is a wonderful experience . . . just act like you belong.

A few things to think about . . . ladies room vs. men's. Most will tell you, if you are presenting female use the ladies room. Is your friend GG? If so, have her accompany you for support. Choose your venue well. Bars can be fun but you don't indicate what kind of bar. Is it an LGBT friendly bar? Just saying because men (especially young ones), booze and cross dressers don't always mix well.

Hugs

Isha

[Judith96a]

Hi Sarah,
Hope that you have fun.
Judith

[Lori Kurtz]

So how did it go, girlfriend? We're all on the edge of our seats here. Full report please!

[sarah555]

Full report coming up later girls.

[heather ann martin]

I'd had a few outings with my older sister and female friends but my first "solo" was still very nerve wracking. I made a real effort, (blouse, skirt, stockings, heels, wig, and full makeup), and was very pleased with my appearance. I spent the afternoon window shopping and absolutely nothing happened, it was wonderful! This was a long time ago but I remember it very well.

[slamddoger]

the frist time out I was veray scared like deer . but as more time that you make out it get better

[Giselle(Oshawa)]

my first time was with another cd who was like my older sister
she steered me through the initial minutes and after that things
went smoothly and I felt so girly it was enchanting.

[Jaymees22]

Actually I was 7 years old on stage as one of Cinderella's ugly sisters, does that count? Probably not, I was nervous though.
My first time outing as an adult I went to a drugstore I must have felt I needed drugs. I was excited and calm at the same time, no one seemed to notice or care. The best thing was as I left the store it was raining slightly and with the ballet flats I was wearing I could feel the rain on top of my feet and I realized it was a totally new sensation. So like with anything the first time is usually the best time or at least you will remember it forever. Hugs Jaymee

[DonnaP]

Try to calm listen to been out once was scared to death. After a couple of hours I felt less nervous I also picked a Mall 75 Miles away. But felt so good I'm trying Boston this weekend. I will let you all know how it went. Really Excited for you and myself.

[Eringirl]

Hi Sarah:

Oh my, my first time out was 15 or more years ago (where does the time go??!! ;) ). I remember it was at a mall, with marble floors. I wasn't quite ready for that in 3 inch pumps, and almost broke an ankle slipping on the floor !! :eek: Not a problem now, but first time, whew ??!! ;)

I was alone, so great that you are going with a friend! As others have said already, relax. Be who you are meant to be. Dress appropriately for the time of day, location and activity. Head up, shoulders back, be confident and "own it". Have fun!!

Erin

[Krisi]

I can't decide what was my "first time I went out in public". A couple times I underdressed in a bra and took water balloons in a bag in my car. Once I got away from the neighborhood I put them in the bra and drove "with boobs". Many years later I bought a cheap wig at a costume store and did pretty much the same thing but with the wig and a blouse that belonged to my wife. It was after dark and I drove around found an empty parking lot and took a few photos. Eventually I go bold enough to dress and walk around the city in the daytime. I took photos.

Now, I have real forms, a real wig and real padded panties and my own clothes that fit.

So it's exciting and fun but it's going to be different for each of us depending on how we look and where we go.

[Alice Torn]

Isha, I remember your near horror story using the men's washroom onme time. Scary indeed. Something we need to keep in mind, about which washroom.

[sarah555]

I shall be using ladies bathroom for sure.

So getting ready for my journey into the big bad world en femme. Blue skirt with black panties bra and tights and a pink blouse. Thinking flat shoes. A touch of perfume and im good to go. x

[Leslie Langford]

"May the Force be with you" ;)

[Jodi]

First time was over 25 years ago--prior to the internet and all the info that is available today. Feelings? Terror and scared sh*tless.

Jodi

[sherri]

Heart pounding, hands shaking, legs trembling, head on a swivel, ready to bolt any second. In other words, I was instantly addicted. ;-)

[sarah555]

Well girls my first outing is going fairly well, had a few glasses of wine so feeling more relaxed. Had a few sneaky looks from people in bar but no one has said anything bad to me. Worst so far is having to queue for cubicle in ladies room while dying to pee lol, the ladies are so much cleaner than the mens. Also some guy at bar tried to chat me up when I went to buy drinks and insisted on paying lol. Now my friend is saying next week we are to go to a niteclub lol. xxx

[Beverley Sims]

Just go out back straight look ahead and walk with confidence........

Who am I to give advice like this when I didn't do any of that.

Sarah,
Go and do it, you won't look back.
Good luck girl. :)

[Glenda58]

It was so long ago maybe 30 yrs ago. The wife was out of town with the kids. Got dressed late at night had a wig and heels skirt and top. Scared someone would see me went to town to the strip mall park my car. Got out looked around didn't see anybody just walked around my car about 3 times got back in and drove some more. Found another strip mall this time I walked up to the store front and looked in the windows the store was close and it was on a main street with cars going by. I walked about a block then turn back to car when someone came around the corner at me. I walked as fast as I could in heels to my car they got there at the same time. I thought I was going to die my heart was pounding so hard. I had to wait to put the keys in the door my hand was shaking so bad. After I got home I wanted to go do it again the next day and I haven't wanted to stop since.

[Tiffanyselkoe]

I had a big sister go to IHOP with me my first time out in public. It was terrifying and exhilarating at the same time.

[Julogden]

Scared shirtless, followed by euphoria when I realized that I'd survived the experience. :)

[Lucy Long Legs]

It took me many years to pluck up courage. When I finally went out, I couldn't remember why I had been scared. A great mixture of vulnerability, pride and exhilaration. And the realisation that I was doing nothing wrong.

[scarletcd]

I held off doing it for so long but last year I finally plucked up the courage to go out in public. I was incredibly nervous at first but the amount of support I had on the night made it a night to remember :)

[Julie Denier]

I think I was more nervous in the time leading up to going out the first time than I actually was doing it. But then, I had some great support. I shared the details of that momentous evening here (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?214689-quot-This-just-got-real-quot-my-first-time-out-dressed!&highlight=) ...

[Katey888]

Sounds like it's gone well Sarah... :)

I can only echo what others have said - but with a lot of planning (for me) the nervousness becomes excitement, and the fear morphs to a deeply satisfying feeling of contentment and satisfaction - my first outing (last October) story is here: http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?219983-I-just-had-to-do-it-one-day%85

:cool:

Katey x

[Stephanie Julianna]

It was the most complete I have ever felt as a person. I had a makeover at Lee's Mardi Gras in NYC in the Spring of 1980. I brought a very pretty print dress in nylon and my own wig. This was at the original store on 10th Ave between 42nd St. and 43rd. Lee tutored me as he applied the foundation and make-up. I was transfixed as the transformation was happening. When he was done and the wig was in place I was almost in tears. It was as if I was seeing myself for the first time. I donned my dress and heels and entered the world for the first time as Stephanie, except I was Debbie back then. Lee had said I looked like a GG she knew named Debbie so I took the name. 10 years later a GG TV admirer I knew said I looked like her girlfriend Stephanie and that was the last name change I made. Stepping out on the street of NYC as Debbie was one of the best experiences I ever had. I spent many a lovely night and weekends with my TV admirer Friend, Sam, over the next 20 years cruising the numerous TV bars, restaurants and clubs the city had to offer. We also just mingled in straight venues as well. Interestingly enough, I became a cosmetic buyer for a Grocery chain and was sent to cosmetology classes for CoverGirl, Prince Machibelli and AZZIZA (remember them?). In a short time I was actually giving Lee tips and product suggestions for his store. It was a wonderful time and even to this day nothing beats getting out en femme. I'm posting a picture that was taken only six months after that first time with Lee Brewster. You've seen it before but it helps the story here.

[Miss Melissa]

My first time was electrifying & stomach churning, like nothing else I'd ever experienced. I still get that feeling when I dress, 25 years later.

[XemmaX]

as for me it was moment of exileration. sure i was scared but i did feel really free at the same time.

[Stephanielawrence]

My first time was this past week to a support group meeting! I have to admit that when the time came to go out I felt less nervous than I thought I would. I had a professional makeover prior to going out (which was also the first time someone saw me dressed!). I think the combination of my new dress, new hair, new boots, accessories and my makeover made me feel confident and calm. It was fantastic and I didn't want the night to end!

[Helen_Highwater]

My first venture out was probably 30 years ago, pre internet, clothes SO's castoffs destined for the charity sale, shoes 2 sizes to small. Not even sure I had a wig back then and makeup that looked like I put it on with a trowel. I drove a short distance to a quiet residential area and walked around what was the old village green and church.

How did I feel? Scared sh**less but driven by a huge compulsion to be out of the house and dressed.

Scroll forward to more recent times. Support from folks here, my own clothes and makeup, shoes that fit and several wigs to choose from. My first real venture out to mingle with the muggles.

How did I feel? Nervous but no longer scared sh**less but still driven by a huge compulsion to be out of the house and dressed.

My next goal is to meet up with other CD'ers. I guess I'll feel somewhere between nervous and elated. Only time will tell.

[DorothyElizabeth]

First time was while in the pit orchestra for Cabaret. I was late, driving to the show already in my ****ty clothing, and got pulled over for speeding. The state trooper looked at me license, and said, "Do you care to explain any of this, MR. -----?"

I told him what was going on. HE said, "This is just a warning, not a ticket. There are no points or fines connected. But be careful; if you get pulled over by the locals in this county, they might not be so understanding."

The first time I went out just dressed as an ordinary female, I reminded myself of what I used to tell people during my dope days: "People see what they expect to see. YoOu can walk down the street smoking a joint, provided you handle it and smoke it as if it were just a normal cigarette." And it was true. I wasn't "clocked" until the cashier at WAWA, where I get coffee recognized me from my usual morning stop there. I expected her to know, but wasn't concerned that she would get all silly about it, and she didn't. She said, "That's a nice dress. Where did you get it? I wouldn't mind having one like that for myself."

[Sabrina727]

My first experience was pretty interesting. I was 16 and living with a girlfriend on the beach. We lived in a studio apt right on a boardwalk that was on the water. It was late at night and I dressed up completely; full makeup, clothes and accessories and went for a walk. All was good for about an hour until a group of people from my work came walking on to the boardwalk. Me being so panicked, I had to jump down and climb up under the boardwalk to let them pass. I totally got away ;) it was actually pretty exhilarating hahah

[crissytgirl]

I went out completely dressed a few years ago for the first time. I did do it on Halloween during the day, to try and ease into it. I went to a local area park, just to walk on a paved path. Nobody was really there, and I was dressed in a really cute top, green plaid skirt, tights, and a pair of boots. I was made-up but wore my wife's sunglasses. I was really nervous about someone seeing me and commenting, but I made it thru. Just was I was getting in my car and leaving, someone was pulling up to walk around the park!

It was pretty exciting to walk around like that!

[jaimiesky]

I remember waiting at the outside door, for what seemed to be an eternity, trying to find enough courage to go through it. I was dressed in a cute jumper, semi-opaque tights, ballet flats, nails done, makeup done, purse on my shoulder and sunglasses on. I remember clearly the exhilaration I felt as my senses were heightened. I can still remember the taste of my lip gloss. I also remember that, at the time, I was over occupied with my ability to pass a natural woman, so I perfected my look. I was going to blend in, go shopping, have a coffee maybe - I was going out in public and I was going to be "me" for the first time! So I went out, drove to the mall (sat in the car) and then got out shopped a bit. I was so excited, I felt so natural, so free. I never noticed anyone looking at me strange and I was careful not to draw attention to myself. I just wanted to be a girl shopping for a new skirt and blouse. So I did. That day is burned into my memory. It was wonderful.
Today I'm not so courageous, and have only ventured out to safe places, and not too often. Why? Not sure. My age perhaps, my masculine features are more obvious now perhaps. I miss that free young girl in the ballet flats.

[sara.rafaela]

I started dressing while traveling for work at the hotel. I typically stayed at a Hampton Inn type hotel. These are nice hotels, but you can also find a room on the first floor close to an exit that goes straight to the parking lot.

My first two trips to the parking lot were outright fear. I got fully dressed, sweater dress, nylons, heels, wig, makeup, forms, and hip pads. The look was somewhat like office lady. Peek out the door... no one there. Test the room key, make sure it is not demagnetized. Car keys in my left hand in case I need to make a quick escape to refuge. Out the door... scary. A few steps through the hallway and iInto the vestibule. Peek through the little window in the vestibule... no one out in the parking lot. OK. Out, a quick walk, and I hope no one sees me. This was very exhilarating, but once I got back to the room; then what?

On the third time I decided to do it all. I went out to Diva's in SF. This is an infamous transgender bar in the Tenderloin. I say infamous because it is in a seedy neighborhood and most of the girls in there are working. However, I had checked it in advance and had seen cross dressers in there. I also felt that once inside, being dressed in there would be the least abnormal thing. OK, it was the same routine escaping the hotel and getting to my car. Then there was the drive. I tried hard to not make eye contact with anyone in the next lane.

Once I arrived there was no parking within half a block of the place. I just did not feel comfortable walking in the open. So, I went for a short drive, came back, circled the block a few times. Finally, there was an open spot, across the street and 4 or 5 car lengths down. I parked. It took a few minutes to calm my racing heart to open the door, kick me feet out, and put my feet on the pavement. Then I was out, here goes; I closed the car door, another nerve wracking step. I walked to bar without incident.

The bar was slow, I picked a spot away from everyone. I sat down and had two rum and diet cokes. I was really concerned about my voice. The bar tender Alexis was nice to me. I felt surprised when she called me sweetie and she. No one else talked to me. Satisfied that I proved something to myself, I got up and left. On the way to my car I passed a shady looking guy who cat called me. I was feeling so good that i just ignored him. I got into the car and left.

[sarah555]

Nice story Sara, I must visit SF.

[Kelley Anne]

The first time I went out fully en femme was a minor disaster. :)
My mom helped me with the makeup and then we went to the local gay bar. Imagine walking into a bar on a Friday night the first time you went in public and you were only only people in there (including me and my mom). I was incredibly self conscious even though the bartender was used to transgender people. So, yeah, it was not a good start to my public CDing. :heehee:

[JuliaM]

My first time felt so natural it was almost anti-climatic - it was like it was meant to be! Showing the world how I feel inside has been the best think I have ever done for myself.

@Stephanie - love, love, love the pic and story :)

[BillieAnneJean]

The first time I ever crossdressed was at a transformation studio. Within less than 24 hours I was in a pastel pink wool double breasted coat, black heels, wine colored knit dress, wig, and everything else walking down main street. Went to a club and danced till 2:00am. I was very self conscious but not afraid because I was with more experienced girls. They protected me. I had a great time and was so buzzed I did not sleep for 48 hours.

Now I do that for new girls and those who want to get OUT enfemme for the first time or just need to become more comfortable. http://www.crossdressersmichigan.com

BTW I go OUT enfemme to places frequented by the general public about 50 times a year. Of those fifty maybe two are less than perfect mostly because some guy has to mumble something. I will take those odds anytime.

Clean out your bucket list while you can.

This is SUCH FUN!

Billie

[SusanaO]

The first time I went out in public? Or the first time I went out in public and was noticed?

When I was 21, I went with some friends for a weekend getaway to Ensenada, Mexico to celebrate a friend's birthday. Well, there was a problem with the hotel we had booked, and three of us were roomless. The other two were a couple, so they stayed at another (expensive) hotel with lots of vacancy. I was going to stay by myself, so I opted for a cottage by the beach as you enter the city (cheap, adequate, roomy for a single person). I had my car, so I didn't mind the 5 mile drive to the hotel and back. After hitting some clubs, around 3am or so we called it a night. I brought my things to sleep in femme, and somehow I packed a mini dress without realizing it. Then I remembered I had left a pair of heels in the trunk of my car - and being tipsy, of course I decided to dress up! I didnt have much on me, so all I put on was a little bit of cover up, mascara, eyeliner, lipstick, fixed my hair (long), and was walking around my cottage in my heels (good thing I had shaved my legs that morning!). Well, I guess it took a little longer for the last drinks I had to really hit me, so thanks to the alcohol I got the courage to go out for a walk where no one knew me (and my friends being 5 miles away). It was dark, no lighting other than the street lights, and hardly any cars drove by, though a few slowed down when approaching me. Honestly, I felt kind of "****ty" (if thats an appropriate word to use). I wish I was dressed classier and where there was more population. After a 15 minute walk (that's all I could take in heels then), I went back to my cottage and called it a night. Not sure of any of my neighbors saw me, but a few greeted me kindly in the morning. Anyway, that was my first time out in public. Lame.

The first time I went out in public and was actually noticed, it was 3 years later at a Halloween party. I dressed like a naughty school teacher, only my skirt was a little longer this time. I got good laughs from friends who weren't expecting to see me like that at all, and even a few compliments from women (e.g. I like your makeup! Who did it? Nice legs!). It was lots of fun, and I even had no problem getting my picture taken with strangers! Now I'm wishing to have more similar moments.

[Adriana Moretti]

I shared my first time....how about my SECOND first time ??...after a 7 year purge from dressing? You know...getting back on the bandwagon......

I decided to make my first trip out a big cd function ( why not right). It was one of Jennifer Bryants Raven Event's.

I arrived the day before the event to scope out the hotel, the club, the resturant, etcc..settled in and figured I would use the night before to brush up on my makeup skills.
I Got dressed, did my makeup, now i was sitting in my hotel room alone and bored, so i popped a bottle of wine....drank that and my mind started wandering off...I JUST traveled over 200 miles, and I'm crossdressed, ALONE, in a hotel room ! What was I doing?? Was I crazy? Have I gone too far?? Do I REALLY want this?? Did I go over the edge?? I undressed and tried to sleep, I couldnt...I just crawled in a ball and shivered all night.

In the morning, I thought about leaving...and coming up with an excuse as to why I missed the event ( I was meeting gals from CD.COM there) . But I decided to at LEAST check out the Meet & Greet and if I hated it I could always use my excuse then.

Showtime came and I drank up some liquid courage to help me get out the door (I wasnt driving,, the meet & greet was right downstairs in the hotel),

I left my hotel room, and was nervous.....sooooo nervous that when I met my friend Samantha she could see I was visually shaken right away....she grabbed me looked right in my eyes and said "Adriana..calm down...it's going to be ok"...and you know what from that moment on...it was !

It was nice to have a big sister like that , and she made me feel right at home.
I wound up staying the WHOLE weekend, even though I had a few blunders ( wig disasters, spilled, drinks, falling in my heels etc...but it WAS fun...and I went to the next, and the next, and the next.....

It was kinda like riding a bike....but it can be overwhelming at first....being alone in the hotel room with just my thoughts and a bottle of wine was prob not a good idea looking back.

[melyssadawn]

Big difference as I was only part dressed , male attire top half but black tights , skirt and low heels bottom half ( though TBH wore jogging bottoms from house to car .Remember vividly the exhilaration of driving like that , seeing the light changing the colour of my tights , the feel of my heels on the car pedals......how do GG's drive in heels lol. Never done it since but the desires still there only next time it'll be fully femme and I may even get out of the car !!!!

[Kathleencd]

I was very nervous for the first half hour or so but I started to feel more confident as I realized most people took no notice of me.

[Jackie Meyer]

My first time was a week ago. I was nervous as hell. Accompanied by bffs, we went for drinks and then to a club. Dancing in heels. What else can I say. Driving home was equally amaising. My lovely long nails on the steering wheel and my dress hiked up as I made my way home. It reminded me that the feeling is exactly why Jackie is such a big part of my life.

I woke up the next morning with a feeling of contentness. I am on the right track. Just do it.

[CD_Princess1234]

The first time I went out in public was nerve racking. I waited until it was sunset. I went to a shopping plaza and went window shopping fearing to go inside. I realized at that moment many of the people around me were wrapped up in their shopping no one noticed me. This gave me confidence to go to other places. Now it's a different life. I'll go out shopping, to dinner and drinks. I haven't looked back

[Auntie]

I went out rather late on a warm September night and just drove around. I was wearing heels, pantyhose, full slip, mid calf skirt and a satin blouse. I stopped at a parking lot by a conservation area and just got out of the car and walked around for a few minutes. I wasn't in makeup and didn't have a wig so I wanted to be close to the car if somebody drove up. I'll never forget the sensation of the breeze going up my legs.

[sometimes_miss]

It was a time when I was quite depressed; I had been turned down by a girl I really wanted to go out with. After the rejection, I went home, no family there. Crossdressing was an escape from the reality of my male life at the time. So I went after my sisters closet, picking out the prettiest dress. Dressed up. Went downstairs. Stared at the front door for quite a while, heart pounding. Peeked through the windows. No one around. Not a soul. Opened the door and stepped out onto the porch. The breeze blew my hair back; my skirt too. Felt nice. I walked down the steps, two flights, all the way down to the sidewalk, looking carefully to see if anyone was around. It was mid afternoon; most were at work, younger kids not quite out of school yet. I didn't fit into my sister's shoes anymore by that point, so I was wearing white sneakers. Suddenly a car came around the turn, and I would be visible to whoever was in it. I quickly turned my face towards the hill opposite the street side of the walkway. The car sped by, no sign of anyone noticing me. But the scare had done it's work; I hurried back to the house, ran upstairs shaking, worried about what could have happened. I never went out dressed as a girl after that for a very long time. But I remember it like it was yesterday, instead of 40 years ago.

[IMJenn]

I'm actually getting ready for my first adventure in public myself. I've taken a walk in the park late at night before, but specifically avoided anywhere people would be. However this is going to be a couple friends taking me to a bar in Philly so no avoiding people there.

What I'm mostly worried about is the bathroom situation. (Well, that and making sure I have everything I need for my outfit. Suggestions?) I'm pretty sure the bathrooms will be uneventful, but I'd rather not be arrested or anything like that. Anyone familiar with Pennsylvania laws regarding this?

[stacy956]

First time i went out i was terrafied went to a town over and went to a drivethru had a short denim white flats and a cute white top my god was i shaking but the best feeling ever :)

[KaceyR]

I've only really dealt with bathrooms in MI and IN myself so far. Granted my situation is now "permanent" compared to when I was just CDing...

My "going out" day was las year January 15th 2014. 3mos after starting to CD. I stepped out of my apartment dressed for the first time. No small short steps..I just decided to go on and plow ahead even tho I was nervous. Although, my dressing in the end was basically making me "feel more normal" in the beginning which may have helped the process.. (Why I later did therapy and since started transitioning). With that "normal" feeling boosting a logical thought of "didn't care what others thought", it turned out great.
But that day I kind of had planned things out to start somewhat.
First, since my makeup skills were less-than-great.. I planned to get a makeover. I'd scheduled it at the MAC counter inside Lakeside mall-Macy's nearby in Sterling Heights. Only takes me a cpl mins to get there..so no time to second guess myself. So dressed in jeans, sweater top and belt..wig.. Kind of knee-high grey suede boots with Stilletos-ish heels, No makeup.. I walked into Macy's entrance. (Lady in front held the door for me.. :) makeover went well..cpl hours starting around 2. Time flew as Glenn there taught me about it. The other part was that the place I sat and the counter itself is right where the escalators are. Lots of people walking by. Way to be "on display" :) While I couldn't see (blind as a bat while I had my glasses off during it) I could hear comments and chat of people going by. Never heard anything bad. And an older mother and (I guess) daughter commented that "that's a cute gal getting made up there" as they walked by. So with all this and nothing yet negative..I contnued with the day.
Went to near nail salon and got a mani-pedi. Whether being good sales clerks or being truthful, when I brought up my CDing she thought I was a normal lady (oh and I had great feet :)). Also that her uncle in Phillipines CD'ed and she'd send clothing care packages to her at times.
So still doing good (and now with red nails :)) I called up and stopped by a friend's house. Should have had them take a pic.. Oh well. I had told them about my CDing..they were supportive then. So visited for a bit.
By then was about 7:30pm, and decided I needed something from the store. So went to Target.
Discovered how highly waxed floors and stiletto-heeled boots worked :). Slipped and danced just a few steps in (heh). One other time in there as well but got things figured out. Got a belt and something else. Maybe a look or 2 by a guy..but nothing drastic.
Now 8-8:30 I was hungry. So went to a family restaurant. Busy there..(Friday) got sat in a booth. Spent an hour there. Possibly one noticing comment by a nearby customer but not bad/derogatory. Funny part was how many different waitresses/managers stopped by thru the time checking if everything was all right, anything needed... Think they might have noticed and word spread by the employees. Was certainly the most time I've ever been "helped" at a restaurant..:)

By 9:45 I was back home.
Now all thru the day I limited my water intake and such.. I didn't even attempt to use the restaurant's bathroom just in case of hassle.

So that was _my_ first day. The perfectness of that makeover kind of set the tone to allow the rest of the day to flow without worry (much..I did stall slightly before Target :) ). It was wonderful.
Not long from that I was in Grand Rapids visiting Billie's group.. First time clubbing :) By March more frequent local stuff, by April/May I was practically fulltiming when I went out except for work..July therapy, Oct started transitioning.. This Jan 1st fulltime even at work.
Lotta things can happen in a year :)

[kkaye]

My first day out, I did not have a problem with nerves but with my heels and walk.I felt the best place was downtown. In this town nothing turns a head downtown.No problem with nerves. I felt it was my right to do what ever, I wanted and to be the woman, I am where, I want. I dressed for me. I felt liberated and like this girl in me had been imprisoned to long.As long as, I was hiding in house, this girl was still imprisoned as, I felt. I did not feel, I would begin to live as me until, I did what, I want when, I want.It's nothing like the feel of a soft dress and panties out in a breeze.A right and an option, I appreciate and will treasure my first day out.

[Jenniferathome]

my first time out was Feb 15th, 2012. Almost a year after joining this site and telling my wife. I logged it here: http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?169295-Out-in-San-Francisco&highlight=

I was remarkably calm. Once I decided to go, it just "was." Of course having two guides (Allie and Rachael) leading the way made it painless. The best part of the outing? I told my wife about it the evening and even using the ladies room. Her comment was priceless, "I hope you sat down!" She envisioned another woman seeing heels facing away from the toilet. The door went to the floor but I did sit.

[Suzanne F]

I met Allie and Rachael the second time I went out I believe. Anyway I will never forget the first time out. When my heels hit the pavement I knew I could finally breathe. I had waited all my life for that night!
Suzanne

[NaNook]

well being a Newbie to thread...I would say ,just go with it !! I have a story for ya !!
cause really no one will Mind? I found this out !!! they will but only if you allow it be yourself....
sounds easy? I know but not when that first time?? for some that have? now we can say "Oh Sure"...LOL
but its not as bad as one may think??

but me? first time I went out I was "Mortified"...LOL
2 friends we were going to meet for first time mentioned no we'll be dressed up...LOL
but was a change of plans...LOL and I was "Only One Gussied Up"....LOL
but I was at point where I was tired of it !! I "Wanted to go Out" !!
so after talking in parking lot? they still gave me some confidence? so they took me to a BAR !!
imagine? my total "First time out" and they drag me to a bar !! but it was fun!! and "No one Cared" !!!
even with my Southern Draw,no one really seemed to notice or care...LOL
well 2 Gentlemen did ? but I was just trying to get through night....LOL I did not think anyone would try and ...well you know??....LOL
but was flattering and Horrifying...LOL(even someone grabbed my Behind!) I did not know if to be pissed or Flattered as well...LOL
but even after walking out to the main street to get back to our car....(I even drove...LOL) we had a great time !!
and I wanted MORE !!!
then found a place where there were CD's wall to wall !!....almost like a "Mecca"...LOL
now to some of the few places I know here in Southern California, it's Easy...if I just act "Normal"
no one cares or minds??....like the more I tried to hide? the worse it was? if this make sense??
so just be yourself....and have fun !!!
I do and hit the dance floor all the time !!!

[Ellen2d]

I started dressing over 20 years ago. After dressing for a while I found and joined a local CD club in the Twin Cities and did attend events with them in a CD friendly environment. The first time I went out in public, in daylight no less, was after a session with a makeup expert that worked with CD's in her home. I went to her home and dressed and then she worked with me on my makeup. After I left I went to the Mall of America. It was both scary and thrilling. I"m sure I didn't fool anyone as I'm over 6 feet tall before my heels. There were a few shops in the mall that were CD friendly and I visited them. I was treated very well and allowed to try some clothes on. I did get a few looks from customers though.

[Mary Poppins]

I wish I had that type of confidence to go out to a mall. I know I would run into someone from work or acquaintances that don't know that I embrace crossdressing. The places I normally go are grocery stores, beauty salons, libraries and out for a walk. I would need like a lifeline to give me strength. I applaud your confidence.

[AccidentalDresser]

I only went out the one time in public but I guess you could say I cheated.
I went to the Sydney LGBT Mardi Gras as the Cliche French Maid.
We rented a hotel room in the CBD and I got dressed their so I wouldn't have to travel all the way in to the city from home that way.
It felt wonderful to be out amongst people who almost expected you to be dressed and looked at people who were not dressed as party poppers.
The streets were lined with French Maids, Nurses, TGirls in shiny silver dance outfits that covered barely a thing and I was amongst a group of mixed GG's & TG's dressed like Fembots from Austin Powers. It was really hard to tell who the GG's were most of the time and there were even a few drunken yahoo males who I think only put on a dress that night for the party like a second Halloween. I really didn't feel exposed or afraid of ridicule at all.
I did however duck behind people every time the TV cameras came near because it's a televised event here in Australia.

[GinFizzieLizzie]

To IMJenn:
I don't know what the law is here in Philly, but I've noticed more and more bars are going to a format of several small one-person unisex bathrooms with a lock instead of one large multi-stall bathroom each for men and women. If it's that type of configuration, then it won't matter anyway.

[Genifer Teal]

Excited beyond belief. Scared out of my mind.

I agree with the above. I share this to say don't judge the future by your first few outings. Find a support group. Make local friends. As you start to feel comfortable, you will be less nervous. Things will go much better. Push through any initial rough times. It WILL get better, MUCH BETTER.

[Krististeph]

I was much younger, my wife and I were newlyweds, more or less. I had on this ruffled skirt, black cotton, I forget the blouse... I was pretty nervous, even though we were not going out to any place- just driving around. Kat was laid back, even encouraged me to relax some. Lucky I did not get stopped for driving erratic (though i don't think i was, just nervous).

Lots of water under the bridge since then. Tips?

Use a good wig, and set it well or learn how to 'play with it' if needed. secure it well.
As much as possible, keep your elbows tucked into your waist, and your knees together.
square your shoulders somewhat
act shy, rather than scared or timid or nervous.
if you get read- so what. I'm a man, baby.
remember you are a person same as anyone else. Be yourself, don't try to over assert yourself (especially in Chicago), and just be kind.
Smile.
have an exit plan if you need it to make you feel safe.
And have a hell of a lot of fun, 30 years ago, it was a lot different. make the best of our more tolerant society as much as you can.

[Angela Marie]

I had a makeover quite a distance from my home. It was the first time for me. When the woman saw me in my dress before the session she said "wow great shape" that made me feel good. I was ecstatic beyond belief at how good I looked after the session. I went to one store on the way home so I did not interact much.

I went out a few times but I did not have good makeup or brushes. It was very quick. Just go get gas and come back. I was very very nervous.

A few months later I went for another makeover, again some distance from my home. Awesome job and I looked great. Again I visited one store and went home. I got home and was about to take the makeup off when I thought "screw this. I look great and if I am ever going to start building some confidence now is a good time" I went back out and drove to s supermarket to pick up some groceries. Was I nervous? You bet? But I looked good. Tight sweater, black tights, and heels. I felt great and empowered. After that I started buying more good quality makeup and brushes and I got much better.

So for me there were a few first times; both of which significant.

[Melissa18]

Hi Sarah
I had my first step out in in public last Tuesday night, albeit in a small country town and late at night but it was the most liberating experience of my life.
I was lucky I had two friends from here for support who were with me via messenger.
Mine was only a small step, but it was a step in the right direction, and as others have said have the support around you and you will be alright. I'm looking forward to the next step by going out to a function with friends, which I hope will be very soon
Enjoy it
Adelaide

[pamela7]

There's "public" and "public" tho, for me.
- in front of my SO, her daughter and daughter's friend - as "a man in a dress"
- my first time out the front door, into the car to drive to a CD/TG group - the drive was exciting, the group was a bit underwhelming actually
- my first time out partially dressed, in a public place, that was also fairly noneventful, quite calm
- my first time out getting made-over, trying on a wig - i'm still bemused
- my first CD/TG group meeting fully dressed with the wig on - last night - was great, I was really feeling into my female form, happy, content, lovely company
- to yet happen will be firsts in public fully dressed, in front of old friends ... scary thoughts!

[HelenR2]

Really nervous until the front door shut behind me then.... normal, even relaxed.

[Alice_2014_B]

I felt very nervous, almost like everyone knew.
:)

[irene9999]

I felt really nervous but once I was out there it felt great!

[drushin703]

It was in September of 2012, and I haven't been that scared for a single moment since then. I went to a Gay bar on Detroit's east side off the I-75 expressway. What I remember most was having to stand in line to get in and this
big fat Black girl talking loud about how some people (me) shouldn't were too much makeup. But when I got inside and ordered my usual Pepsi-no-ice, I sort of calmed down a bit. Then I said, "hey, I look better, am dressed better,
smell better and act better then she does".

That was the only negative comment of the night that I could hear..........I had a blast.....dana

[SharonDenise]

I haven't gone out dressed en femme alone in public, yet. My first time was to a Chi Chapter meeting. I went en drab and changed when I got there. When I asked where could I go to put on my make-up the members suggested the ladies room as that what you are presenting yourself as. I thoroughly enjoyed that first time experience of the ladies room and being dressed up with supportive gurls and GGs. I have since gone to several more meetings already dressed as it gets dark so early in the winter.
However, I've gone twice to dine with my make-up artist/coach to her favorite restaurant dressed en femme. This is a different experience than going to a support group activity. Being with another person made me relaxed and I thoroughly enjoyed both occasions.

[Brandy Mathews]

First time for me, my heart was going so fast! Was exilerating, scary, but the longer that I was, got more comfortable. Then it was so amazing! Started feeling the woman in me come out, feeling so good. Haven't been out in a while, missing it so much too.
Was out in drab tonight and sitting in a resturant at a bar and a couple came in, she sat right next to me, him on her other side. She looked over at me and her eyes were smoking hot! Thought......omg, please do mine like that!!!! So beautiful! Amazes me how some women, cd's too, can make their eyes look so beautiful!!! I have tried off and on for over 20 years, still trying my best.
Hugs,
Bree :)

[Megan b]

It was the scariest thing I'd ever done in my life and it was the funnest thing I'd ever done in my life. Took me 3 years before I went out again but now it's just part of my life. I love going out as Megan.

[pamela7]

going out in 30 minutes to take my daughter to the railway station, will be daylight, public, and other people around for sure, plus getting into the car in front of the neighbours ... here goes courage!

PS did it, home safe, no problems, everyone was so focussed on themselves I passed :-)

[Gwinnie]

I just did this a few weeks ago. I drove an hour and a half away to go shopping at Torrid. I'd shopped there in drab before. I had a coat on the whole drive up but I still felt like everyone knew. I got out of the car, took my coat off and put on my scarf. Across the parking lot and into the store I went. Boobs leading the way. :-) I felt like everyone was looking at me. I don't think anyone really was. I went into the store and it was empty except for 2 SA. They complimented my boots and pretty much left me alone. I was in there for about 20 min. Didn't buy anything. :-( So I went outside. I figured, hey why not? I went into dress barn. The SA there pretty much shooed me out the door. As I was going out a man and his wife were coming in. I held the door open for them. He thanked me and didn't give me a 2nd look. So, I went over to maurices. No one said a word to me in there. Back into the car and drove to another shopping complex. I didn't do much there. So, all in all, I didn't do a whole lot. It was scary, yet felt wonderful to be out and walking around in a skirt, boobs and puffy sleeves. And, I didn't die.

Gwendolyn

[julielivingmylife]

My first time out was a few months back - it was no more than a 3/4 minute walk down the street in the evening. I had make-up and a wig on but ended up putting my unisex coat hood over my head as it was cold and windy so I cheated a little (still, I had a dress and tights on with flats so my bottom half was pretty feminine). A few cars went past but thankfully no pedestrians as I would have ran for cover if I'd seen a soul. It was such an amazing experience that I'm now planning my next outing and this one will be head-to-toe.