One little yellow post it - big message??

[Eringirl]

Okay, so today is the one day of the week when my wife is out the door in the morning before I am. Everything normal this morning. As I am heading out the door, there is a post it note on the wall by the coat rack (where we put notes for each other as we know we will see them there) that simply reads:

"donate men's business clothes and shoes"

Now, you have to know that is the way my wife would write something that is a "to do", much like "take out the garbage". So, I take it as a directive to me to get rid of my business wardrobe of suits, dress shirts, ties, shoes, etc, etc. Background....I have only worn a suit/dress shirt and tie two days in the past 6 months at work, and that was pretty much a command performance for outside examiners/review team. Since then, it has been dress pants, pullover sweaters, turtle necks, long sleeve dressy pullovers, etc, most of which are women's cuts, but not obviously so. (i.e. neutral solid colours etc.). Work is fine with it as long as it is still "professional".

So, this is an interesting turn of events. I have to work late tonight as I teach until 8:30, at which time I am usually pretty exhausted when I get home, as is she, given her longer day as well. I may not have the mental energy to work through this tonight, but obviously will have to. An interesting development....??? :thinking:

Erin

[MsVal]

That's an interesting "To-Do".

Are you two running out of closet space? Preparing for some household renovation? Was this mentioned in a conversation?

Do you have any idea what inspired her to write that?

Very interesting - indeed.

Best wishes
MsVal

[Jennifer-GWN]

Erin;

Step one roll in the wheelbarrow
Take it from there...

Whooohoooo closet cleaning.

Smile... Jennifer

[Nigella]

Was it a note to you, or was it a reminder for herself, either way, it clears some space for RETAIL THERAPY :D

[Rachel Smith]

Personally I would just give her a kiss and say thank you for your support.

[Eringirl]

Thanks for the comments and thoughtful questions. This is totally out of left field. My wife has never before demonstrated any tolerance with any of this. So this is very interesting. There is no closet space issue. No renovations. One way to look at this is that she is accepting that I don't want to wear men's clothes anymore and it is an acceptance that "you might as well get rid of them then." a la Rachel's point of view given below.

I was totally gobed smacked when I saw that this morning. So it could appear to be a realization that I don't want to wear men's clothes anymore. It may also be a test to see what my reaction is. It could be that her response may depend on my reaction. i.e. if I say "great! Out they go" then she knows this is not going to go away. If I say "nah, I want to keep them just in case I feel like wearing them again" in which case she may think this will go away, it is a phase and I am not serious about this.

So, I am trying not to read to much into this. I am not going to get my hopes up in case it does blow up in my face, as in "well if you want to get rid of them, this isn't going to go away, so you might as well leave with your clothes". This is a strategy my therapist is suggesting as she is trying to build me up to make sure that I don't get annihilated again. Be careful not to read too much in anything and be prepared for the worst. If it is positive, that is terrific, but steel yourself, just in case.

So, that is what I am doing. I am however, going to approach the subject in an open and non threatening manner so as not to set the tone as confrontational.

Geez, this can get complicated fast !! :)

Will update the post once I see how it all goes down.

Erin