a question - did you have more girls as friends than boys as a child?

[pamela7]

This whole opening up to CD has asked me questions of my soul, who i am, and last night i had my first "outing" to attend a CD/TS/TG group.
I came home confused. I could FEEL who was a woman in a mans body, who was CD and who was TG. I realised I'm used to female company, I've always preferred it from a young, young age, i just never though of cross-dressing until recently.
I think its men I don't understand, but then I've always thought of myself as a man. So I've been left with this question ... how does one know they are a male or a female (outside of the physical body/genetic factor) - what makes a female brain or a male brain or a brain that's both or mixed?

I'm interested in knowing if any of you have mainly been in a male world before coming out or if you've had a long-term female connection, and how you feel/know you're a woman or a man (who dresses or not).

yours, ever so slightly confused today


xxx Pamela

[Stephanie47]

Growing up I had absolutely no friends who were girls. I suppose there were girls in my classes in elementary school, but, I never played with them. In my apartment building and the buildings around mine, all my friends were boys. I can remember only one girl my age, and, I had no interest in her. I indulged in sports as did all the guys in the building. There were enough guys my age to field a baseball team. Our team did have a girl center fielder, "Charlie," AKA, Linda. I wasn't until junior high that I realized girls existed, but, it was still sports with guys that took my time. All my cousins were boys my age. The only females I associated with were adult relatives. This entire cross dressing thing would make more sense if I had female cousins who would have dressed me up! I don't have a clue!!

[DonnaT]

Nope. I shied away from girls.

[Lacy PJs]

To answer your original question, I still have more female friends/acquaintances than I do males.

Lacy PJs

[iGenny]

More boys as friends than girls, maybe 70%.

[lisalove]

Up to 7th grade I did have more girl friends. I hung out with the girls all the time. After 7th grade I really only had a few select guy friends I kinda hung out with. In reality I didn't care to hang out with anybody.
I hated school and anything to do with it, and that included just about everyone that had anything to do with school.

[nikki2014]

Interesting topic. I had and still have lots of women friends. For some reason they flock to me. I get along wonderfully with women. I always have. In a man's body I am very good looking. I'm 5'7" and weigh about 160-ish, dark tan, brown hair and brown eyes. I do attract a lot of women but mostly only a conversational piece. When it comes to men I'll say hi and how are you doing but nothing ever really sparks from that conversation. I've only had 2 dear friends in my life and both of them have past due to military commitments. But for the most part growing up and now I have more women friends than I do male. I do get looks from men when I talk to their wives but when they see me with my wife and how we interact they seem to change their position. I guess they don't see me as a threat or something. But in all I have more women friends and always have than male friends.

Nikki

[Tammy Lynn Tx]

Until I got out of the Navy and started coming to grips with who I am, I had to be a very macho guy. Once i started becoming at ease with myself it seemed like it was easier to talk to everyone else and more ladies started talking to me and it was easier to talk to them. When I was in school I was terminally shy, but thanks to my wife I pretty much meet new friends. (mostly females)

[donnalee]

Oddly enough, I was thinking about that just last night. The neighborhood kids who were my age were mostly girls, but the girls I hung out with were, for the most part, tomboys. As I got older and expanded my range there were more boys; I really think it was more of a matter of who was available to play with than anything else.

[kyla_cd]

Oh definitely far more closer to girls. Just seem to relate better...weird right ;)

[Ressie]

I'm interested in knowing if any of you have mainly been in a male world before coming out or if you've had a long-term female connection, and how you feel/know you're a woman or a man (who dresses or not).


I haven't come out really. I'm in the closet as far as my family, friends and coworkers go. I had primarily male friends throughout my whole life. But somewhere along in my adult life I became more comfortable being around women. Men are just fine for the most part, but I guess I have a fear of being around guys with a macho persona, especially if they're in groups.

Women are more right brained, men are more left brained.

[EllenJo]

Growing up my friends were boys and girls. Most of my local friends were boys and at family events I hung out with my girl cousins on both sides of the family. I am still close to my female cousins to this day. During college I had girlfriends and I had "Friends that were Girls". I have been the only male in an all female work environment, at another job I managed 46 employees and 80% of them were female and we got along great. Today I have two very close male friends and just about all of my other friends whether at Church or work are all female. Many times I chuckle when I am with my female friends because I am the only one that know that we are all wearing panties.

So I guess I am a male but with many long-term female connections.

Hugs
Ellen Jo

[DorothyElizabeth]

Until I was in 6th grade of elementary school, the only male friends I had were in the classroom or recess. I lived in a rural area, and the nearest neighbor my age (a girl, as it happened) was 1/4 mile through the woods (3/4/ mile by road). She moved away when I was in second grade. When I was very young, living in Philadelphia while my dad was attending Drexel, all the neighbor kids were girls. But we only lived there for one year. The only male friend I had was the year we lived with my dad's parents, but he was drowned about three months after we moved to the rural area. I had just turned five when Terry drowned. I had a fairly close friend at school from first through fourth grade, but he was killed during the fourth grade Christmas vacation in a sledding accident. I never had any really close friends after that. In retrospect, I think I was unable to let myself get to close to anyone, because I knew that eventually something would happen, and they'd leave. When I was in sixth grade, some new houses were built nearby, so I had some friends and we formed a Boy Scout Troop. When we went to high school, three of my friends went to private schools, so there were only four of us in the neighborhood who rode the same school bus and got home at about the same time.

[TxCassie]

Let's see, in elementary school, Catholic School in the 60s, I started with a male best buddy, he moved away after the 3rd grade. After that, I had four male buddies, one being my best friend, he was the jock of the group. One was the mischievous one, the other was the ladies man (he was a very cute kid), and that left me, the sensitive, smart, level headed one. We made a great group. In high school, an all male, Catholic College Prep, the girls high school was across the street. But everyday for four years, guys were all over the place, lol. I made three life long friends, all male, two which are still my best friends, the third after 20yrs, decided to move away and cut ties. In college, I became a big brother to a sorority but still had male friends.

Cassie :love:

[Melody A]

The girl next door, the girl across the street and I were all the same age. They were my best friends growing up. I definitely related better with girls.

Mel

[Tiffany Jane]

This topic is a foundation for my understanding of how crossdressing has played a part in my life. I have always been "one of the guys" but deep down I feel more comfortable around female friends and am able to build relationships with women. A lot of it comes from being dissappointed by men in my life. For the most part, I find the relationships I have with women have remained while relationships with men in my life have let me down somewhere along the way and I don't put as much effort into relationships that don't provide me with a sense of balance.

Now in social settings, I am more likely to be part of a womens conversation than hanging out with the guys. It is just part of who I am.

[Mary Poppins]

I definitely had more friends that were girls growing up. The same later in life.

Dame

[Beverley Sims]

When younger it was pajama parties, makeup sessions and dressing up.
I loved the girl contact more than with the boys.

[lynda]

hello , i had a few girl freinds , but mostly boys we were surfing all the time and in them days it was a all boys club. not like today but later i did hang out with surfing girl who became the first pro surfer from my state not the first girl but the first surfer .very proud of her. hugs love lynda

[AngelaYVR]

For a few years, my best friend was a girl (age 3-5). I remember playing hide and seek with her and I hid in her closet. When she found me I asked her if I could try on one of her dresses! She said no. She was the only girl I was friends with as a child and I still remember her fondly.

[Ceera]

Thinking back... My two favorite cousins growing up were both girls - one a couple years older than I, and one a couple years younger. I remember playing with them a lot when I was really little, and through grade school. From age 5 through high school, my favorite neighbor to play with was the girl next door who was a year older, and sort of a tomboy. She had a brother, a year younger than I, yet I didn't like playing with him! Summer vacations as a kid, spent all my time with my little sister and with our three best friends who lived in the town we vacationed in - two girls, who like my cousins were a year or so on either side of my age, and their brother, about my age. Yet it was the girls I recall most from those vacations. I think it is safe to say that until I started High School, I played more with girls than with boys, and often that was girly play, with dolls and tea parties! I did play with groups of neighbor kids of both genders, for things like tag or hide and seek. Growing up, my mom taught me to cook and sew and do laundry, insisting that regardless of gender, any child should know how to run a home and care for their own needs.

Around eighth grade I started trying to participate in more hetro, date-like activitied with girls, attending dances and dating, but wasn't very successful. By then I'd already tried on girl clothes in secret, and had experienced one intimate encounter with a male, but I supressed any gay or CD leanings because my dad was homophobic. I went into the Navy after high school and hated it, in part because I felt unconfortable living in such close quarters with so many guys! I was worried I might be suspected of at least being bisexual.

After the Navy I went to college, did normal hetro dating and married a nice girl. Mostly set my fem aspect aside until my mate died last year. Then I decided to go ahead and try CD and dating either gender.

[bridget thronton]

Perhaps I did have many girls as friends

[Nancy Sue]

What a thought provoking question. When I was in K and elementary school I always hung with girls much more than boys. When I reached puberty I always spent more time with girls, and did not hang around with any boys. My given name is one that both boys and girls have, and I had as many girl friends with the name than boys. The girls always said they wished they had my eye lashes (something my make-up artist confirmed last week), and my legs. Hmm, I should have taken the hints sooner! (Little did they know I had their same underwear.) In college my only real friends were girls, and while I have male colleagues in my profession I regard as friends, I have only had one really close friend in my life, a guy. When I am in a group at a business meeting I talk more to the women than the men. Thanks for asking, as it has been very enlightening for me to think about this.

[Adriana Moretti]

when I was a kid....I played army....and threw rocks at the passing trains......and when nobody was looking wore my cousins tu tu balerina costume......but i had all guy friends..........

[Lily Catherine]

In my first 3 years of primary school, I stuck with the girls because the boys were a rowdy, noisy bunch and I did not enjoy football/soccer and did not care for it. And thus, I was participating in the girls' activities for at least 2 years of school. Heck, the girls sometimes told me not to befriend the boys in the earlier years. The vast majority of them were proto-jocks.

And then I went to a boys' school at 13. The number of women I was in contact with dwindled till I turned 17 and went on to senior high. Even then most of my friends and acquaintances are male.

[pamela7]

wow, thank you girls, this is really helping me.
i'm thinking that who one prefers to pass one's time with indicates one's nature?

[Ellen2d]

Until I was 11 my father was in the military. We moved around a lot, sometimes 2 or 3 times in a year. I never got close to anyone as I knew that there would be no lasting friendship. That carried on in my life and to this day I don't have any friends from school except for my Bro In Law's brother who is the same age as me. I do recall that I always seemed to get along better with girls but I was way to shy to ask one out. Finally broke that my senior year in HS but only had one date. A
As an adult I always got along with the women I worked with better than the guys. I've never been a sports fanatic but for the most part I've had "masculine" interests. I like to work on mechanical things ie: cars and I like carpentry having built 4 homes 2 for myself and one each for parents and sister. I'm now embarking on the final build of my life in my dream home.
It's funny, like my dad, in a group setting I tend to be with the women more than the guys.

[Lynn Marie]

I was referred to as a "ladies man" 10 years ago at a competitive event. It kind of surprised me, but on reflection I realized that that was a pretty accurate observation and that I've always been that way. I could always talk with women easier than with men even to the point of causing problems with girlfriends and the ex by spending more time with the ladies than with the men.

[sometimes_miss]

Growing up, I had few friends, ever. Living off the beaten path, only a couple of boys my age bracket, neither my friend. Nor girls. My sister had three friends her age, me, none. From age 9 up, I would have 'sort of' friends who were more friends to each other than to me, guys who were only with me during certain activities like basketball, but after the game was over, we went our separate ways. That was pretty much my experience almost all the way through high school. Girls became not really friends, but someone to talk to when I was sitting next to them at school or working as a volunteer. But we didn't hang out outside of school or work. Later, as an adult, single women weren't friends because they didn't want me to assume they wanted anything more, and of course a single young male couldn't hang out with married women. It wasn't until my 20's that I learned how to cultivate friendships, and even then, only a few. I mostly talked to the married women at work. Mid 20's I learned how to socialize and make friends.

[Karen kc]

growing up in the country, there was 4 little boys, one of us had moms draws on! guess who lol

[Krisi]

No. My friends were boys except for the girls I dated.

[CarlaWestin]

I guess I was like Krisi. Mostly male friends doing traditionally male things. But, I always had a girlfriend or two. And, I was very comfortable playing with dolls and doing girl stuff with them. I had fun getting dirty or getting pretty. Maybe that's why my attitude towards embracing the full gender spectrum is so universal and matter-of-fact.

[girlbh44]

Shoot it has to be girls. I was the mr abbey of Jr high and High school. I gave all the girls advice.

[Jenniferathome]

I was the typical boy. All my friends were boys and all the girls had kooties. I know and knew I was "male" the same way I know I am straight or know that I will take another breath after this one.