why do you wear what you wear?

[Welshgirl]

Hi again, more questions. I am having to turn my dressmaking talents to making clothes for Pamela, as her frame is definitely not the same shape as ladies' clothes. (Think bodybuilder with a little bit of spare round the middle!)

This has launched me into the mysterious world of larger ladies fashion - I'm small and slim myself - and I am trying to get to grips with some fundamentals of clothing design. The big question, and one that guides the whole shape and feel of the clothes that I am making is, what makes you choose the clothes that you do? Is it the look, the feel, or something else?

Thanks x

[kimdl93]

Tough question. I would say the look and fit. I suspect each person has a mental image of how they'd like to look. In my minds eye, I'd see a tallish, lightly tanned, blonde, which I am, ( a tad slimmer) wearing clothes that complement my height and coloring, accentuating my legs and helping define my waist. That being said, the style can very with the situation.

[NicoleScott]

A crossdresser's dream come true -a supportive wife with dressmaking skills.
To answer the question, everything I do is about the look, but I like the associated feels, sounds, and scents.

[Ineke Vashon]

The feel of fabric and how a skirt swirls around shaved legs is a biggie for me. Separate tops and skirts are easier to acquire for an average male body like mine. I prefer loose medium length skirts and somewhat sporty tops, reflecting an outdoors preference.

Pamela is one lucky gal to have you.

Ineke

[Gretchen_To_Be]

Hi Welshgirl. I'm a muscular guy also. I find that wrap dresses are very flattering and the material is forgiving. I use a corset to reduce my waist and they look halfway decent. Most skirts and dresses are knee length or just above.

The look I am going for is sort of the sexy side of office professional, not streetwalker.

Good luck!

Shibumi

[Lily Catherine]

Some cocktail of both, that's my best guess.

Looks wise I prefer full / A-line / ball gown silhouettes as they give if not enhance the hourglass look and wider hips. Also, as I am small and slim I make use of short skirts to make myself look taller (and expose the tops of my stockings, among other things.)

Feel wise internally I go for anything with a lining due to the silky smooth feeling they give off. Externally, satin and tulle in particular feel great to the touch, in addition to being so pretty. Sadly lace is mostly aesthetic.

If I may say so, an evening gown swishing against stockinged legs is a sight and feeling to behold.

[sometimes_miss]

I wear things that would fit the person I feel that I am. In a way, I'm brain damaged. Something in the back of my mind will always feel like an adolescent girl. I've never been able to escape that. So, I wear stuff the style of which you'd find being worn by girls in their early to mid teens. Why? Because it makes congruent what I think, with what I see and feel. Another way to put it would be to say it helps make me feel comfortable in my own skin.

[Nadine Spirit]

I try and choose clothes that flatter me. I try and use the clothes to help me achieve the look I am wanting. For example, a seemingly small thing like the placement of a seem in a dress can make all of the difference in how it falls on a body. The right seems can help give the illusion of hips or they can make an already straight hipped body look even less curvy.

[cdterri]

My wife makes and alters clothes for me all the time. She knows what materials and styles I like. I'm 5'11" and weigh 170lbs. Empire waist dresses work well to hide my tummy bump (minor beer gut) and full or a-line skirts with a tighter top give me an hourglass figure. So for me it's both style and fabric that matter.

[Beverley Sims]

I choose clothes for the look and because I like what I wear.

[docrobbysherry]

What Nicole said. Plus, I like to look: hot, sexy, or at least attractive.

Pretty much in THAT order----:battingeyelashes:

[AllieSF]

I think that one needs a desired style that hopefully works well for them and their body shape. For me it is the look of the final product. Does it hang well, fit close enough to my body to give the appearance of a female figure, and is it complimentary to me? I am still experimenting with styles and looks after 8 years of dressing completely and going out into the real world. It is all trial and error. I think that you are a perfect guide for your SO and can help influence what works best for her. That is invaluable advice, especially in the fit and final look areas. We all have our favorite styles and others yet to be discovered. So, what may be liked by one may not work for another. Good luck.

[Cheryl T]

For me it's everything. The style, the fit, the color, the fabric all have an impact on my purchases. I buy what I like to wear, what looks flattering on my body and what makes me feel good, be it a tight pair of jeans or a knee length skirt.
There isn't one thing that makes a choice for me, it's the sum of the parts.

[Nikkilovesdresses]

It's looks, feel...and fantasy. Isn't it the same for a woman? Doesn't a woman choose at least some clothes hoping that by wearing them she'll look slightly more like some media image she aspires to?

Our problem is that many of us are starting with the added disadvantage of wide shoulders and a waist the same size as our hips!

Top of my wish list, and I haven't had any luck finding it online even in normal female sizes, is a bias-cut black trouser suit with bell bottom pants and a tailored jacket with exaggerated lapels which buttons very low at the waist, so it will hang open at the chest. I want it to look expensive, so it has to be maybe a very light linen/wool blend (banned in 2 OT books of the Bible, as it's a mix of animal and vegetable- don't ask me why that matters) and a charcoal silk lining. If linen/wool won't hold a hard crease then I'll have to rethink.

I also want a black fedora, wide brimmed, with a charcoal band, and black strappy low heels.

Easy, right??

Er, no. Since I know it's going to be expensive to go to a tailor, I haven't taken it any further- I don't have that much money right now, plus I believe I'm going to lose more weight so it's definitely premature.

And you thought Pamela was fussy...

Happy 10th post by the way! Now our world is your lobster :)

[sabrinaedwards]

You are a dream come true for your SO! I love it all, the feel, the scent of perfume, the look, high heels!
Love, Sabrina

[LeotardMan]

Obviously the feel :) However, since for me its leotards.....Big surprise! When I was a kid and would dress in my mom's leotards it was the feel of it but also feeling closer to her, and also wanting to look like the women on TV. Today, it is also to look like the women on an exercise video, but also my workouts are my girly time.

[Marcelle]

Hi there,

I tend to wear clothes that allow me to blend what I have to approximate a female shape and form. Not being a tall or big guy, I am still quite muscular in the upper body. Given that I can fit most women's fashions (size 6-8 depending on the fit) but I can never go sleeveless because it will be too noticeable. I don't using padding or breast forms but I do have enough junk in the trunk to pull off a reasonable behind and my muscle definition will allow me to fit a 36A push-up with a reasonable cleavage for a narrow hipped small chested gal. As stated I choose clothes to blend so I stick to a lot of jeans, tops with dresses used only for specific functions (dinner, parties). Typically, I look at what women my age are wearing on a daily basis and design my personal style around that.

Hugs

Isha

[Adriana Moretti]

Good question....like most girls I like the feeling of certain materials ( that plays into the cd thing pretty hard) but I do not always have to be wearing those types of materials when I dress. Sometimes leather pants, or a pvc skirt is just not the right thing to wear in public.....which brings me to the other factor...comfort....i would MUCH rather be comfortable, and practical while out in public, so i may not particularly be fond of the material itself, it is serving it's purpose, and as stated earlier FIT is everything too.

[Katey888]

Hi Welshgirl... (by-the-by, Welsh female names are some of the cutest and prettiest I've come across - Arianwen is my fave so far... I'm on a crusade to get you to adopt something more harmonic than your current username - but I digress... ;))

One of my favourite observations about what we wear as well as how we present is that our behaviours are rooted in motivation. It's why I keep coming back to the awfully perplexing 'why' question, but I think it's relevant - because each of us has subtly (sometimes radically) different motivations for doing this, that leads to different interpretations of presentation and what is right for each of us. I think you will see clusters of similar behaviour and clothing choice, and also some radically different individuals who all fall under this pastel, fringed parasol of CDing...

I'm waffling a bit because I'm still learning a lot about myself and my own needs and motivations here... A year ago, I could have been typified as: 1980s glam on a twenty something look... but I've moved on a bit from there (thank goodness!), and moved through smart office to summer casual, leggings and tops (that has the remains of nightmares for me...) and always something elegant and glam. I rarely dress to blend, as that tends to be the province of girls that go out more in the vanilla world. I did it a bit for my first outing, but dressing at home should be anything but mundane (sorry Isha... :eek:) and actually you can go out glam, but you have to have the right venue... So you're getting that this is mainly about look for me... and it is very much about 'femulation' (for want of a better word).

I like to think of that as emulating that feminine something that we so admire, desire and - to some extent - crave to experience... It may not seem it at first, but it is a lot about adoration of women... don't ask me how in our misfiring minds we think doing this is achieving that, other than imitation being the sincerest form of flattery. We can pull off a bit of a 'look', that is actually much better in our minds eye than reality, but it's because we love the look and women so much... :)

I'm going to plagiarise a bit here as well from my friend Isabella who summed it up like this (and I paraphrase a bit): "When, as a man, can you ever look fabulous...?" And that has rung a big old bell for me... as ONLY women's fashions really allow one to be ab-fab... :cheer:

So yes it's look: styles that de-emphasise the masculine inverted vee shape and emphasise our better individual features are better... This was a big question really, and can go deeper but I think I had better stop now... I hear a cabernet crying to me from an open bottle in my kitchen... I will drink and think some more... ;)

Katey x

[Rachael Leigh]

For me it has to look right for sure that's why I try on before I buy, almost always in drab too.
Style is important and then how does it feel on.

[phylis anne]

Well as a newbie still peeking out of the closet I tend to dress blended unisex style as I get more comfortable and come to the realization no one is watching anyway unless you really call attention to yourself then I will get a little more girly I tend to prefer pants so as I get more comfy will switch from ladies jeans to dressy slacks
hugs phylis

[phoseluvr]

For me, it's firstly the feel of silky pantyhose, ever since I was a teenager I have loved slipping my feet and legs into them. After that initial great feeling, I concentrate on wearing what I can that will accentuate my legs. I'm lucky to have small feet (women's size 9), and I'm 5'10" and I have nice legs, so it's usually high heeled pumps, the pantyhose, and either a skirt or jacket which only comes down to my upper thighs. I personally love how I can make my legs look, and the looks I've gotten from men when I've ventured out confirm that they like the look, too!

[Angela Marie]

I have always loved tights. I started by wearing my moms tights years ago. Now they are an integral part of my ensemble. I love the way my legs look in the. I Work out daily so I have well toned legs and I have a petite frame (5 ft 7 140). One of my favorite outfits is my nice short, tight red sweater with a pair of blac tights and heels

[Kate T]

It is a toughie.

Mostly look, sometimes feel, increasingly functionality.

E.g. I like the LOOK of denim jeans and skirts but I hate the FEEL of denim. Just not my thing. I have a couple of nice flowy knee to calf length skirts in light cotton and I really like the LOOK and the FEEL but they frankly are just not that functional unless I'm doing the "going out looking pretty" thing. Then I have a couple of pairs of 3/4 length pants in cotton drill and denim that I'm not fussed on the look or feel of them but they are really very functional for going to the beach / park with the kids etc.
Occasionally the whole three happily coincide. I have a really nice silk short sleeve shirt that looks great, feels great and is really functional. Needless to say it gets worn a LOT :)

[ophelia]

I'm in great shape from cycling, x-country skiing and speed skating, With a full enough skirt I really do not need shapewear or foundation garments. But the feel of a really taut body shaper, elastic panties or waist cincher...it all feels so "non-male" that it's part of every ensemble. It gets me aroused and that is part of Ophelia.

[justmetoo]

I agree with CherylT, the whole package. Look, style, color, what works for my size/shape/age, feel of the fabric, feel of the way the clothes fit and flow, how I feel when I'm wearing them, etc.

[Jorja]

I wear what I wear so my cute lil tushy don't get cold. ;)

[erickka]

I tend to go for the look, but if it is not comfortable, I won't wear it, and keep looking for something that meets both requirements.

[BOBBI G.]

To keep from being arrested for indecent exposure.

Bobbi

[bridget thronton]

Dresses are more figure friendly and I do like the look (when they fit and hide my tummy) and the feel.

[scarletcd]

Comfort above all else. I'm still big into the rock & punk scene though so I still keep my tartan skirts and band tshirts for those occasions :P

[sara.rafaela]

Hi Welshgirl, I usually go out at nights to bars and clubs. I try to put together an attactive ensemble. I try to appear as womanly as possible. This includes corset an hip pads. I cannot say it is comfortable. I would say the biggest obstacle for me is a blazer, jacket, or coat for daytime wear. I can wear a size 14 dress. Items from Ann Taylor and Macy´s Inc. look good on me. But, with a jacket I need to go to size 18 to get the shoulders to fit. Even so, the arms and torso are too short. I found clothing at Lane Bryant at size 16W where the torso length and shoulder proportions are right, but now the belly is way to big and these articles make me look like a frumpy lady. I think I will need to buy from there and have the items tailored.

Sara

[UNDERDRESSER]

Way back, when I started, it was pretty much the feel, that and doing something "forbidden" The "look" was about just being able to see myself in a mirror, so not in the way you mean that word, I think.

Now? I don't feel that I am a crossdresser, in my own mind, so I don't know if this is helpful to you, but I'm experimenting with different types of clothing, mostly skirts, though I have an on-going search for functional, good looking, comfortable, hosiery. ( some successes there, finally! ) I think, that I can use a "male cut" sweater dress, of some sort, or some kind of tunic or tabard. A dress for guys, essentially.

For the future, it has to be a look that I feel able to carry off convincingly, shows off my best features, does the job, i.e. keeps my body comfortable, easy care ( ish ) and go about my day to day activities. I have been given the go ahead to wear skirts to work, so have been pondering the first steps there, probably a fairly basic cargo skirt in a colour that works with certain "uniform" requirements.

I'll add to the comments that say Pamela is a lucky girl ( guy ) to have you. I shouldn't be so envious, as my SO is completely un-phazed by my "dressing" But I wish she was able to appreciate the feel of the stuff more when I wear it, or when she wears sexier clothing, but the problem there is that she is a little too sensitive in a tactile way.

[VAWyman]

I had to think about that... Why DO I wear what I wear?
I initially bought it was the look, and I really wanted it to be that. But the truth of the matter is that I like the feel. I like the compressed feel of a good pair of pantyhose, the hug of a nice, well fitting bra, the breeziness of a well-made skirt, a crisp well tailored blouse. When everything feels right, and good, the look will be there. And the complements will follow.

"Wow, girl, you look great!"

That's why I do it.

[Zeldamoonflower]

Personally I want to try 4 different styles. A casual style for me to enjoy at home, frilly and super girly, cosplay inspired and, goth punk hybrid.

[Sarah-RT]

I wear the clothes of girls my age, I'm 24 so anything 18-24 which is usually jeans and tees as opposed to dresses, I've noticed girls are dressing more for comfort and fashion than for being feminine unless there is an occasion.

I used to wear items that were very feminine so I could think that way but now I'm buying clothing that I like, that's comfortable and stylish. I've also begun to wear suitable clothing so as high neck tops so my breast forms don't stick out and I don't need to shave my upper torso, jeans are good for not needing to shave your legs too.

[Annaliese]

The softer fabric, is what catch my eye first, then it the look.

[Jaymees22]

I think I pick clothes mostly for the look or style, and I like to try different styles mostly more youthful than I am, that's not hard I'm 70. The feel is also important the clingier the better, a little stretch is good. Hugs Jaymee

[petrahughes]

Personally I want to try 4 different styles. A casual style for me to enjoy at home, frilly and super girly, cosplay inspired and, goth punk hybrid.

Frilly and super girly is what I love to be dressed as much as possible. If I am just on a normal cleaning day I still like satin slips, hose and knee long dresses

[Candice Mae]

Well I can't go out in public naked....

[DebbieL]

There are many considerations for me. I usually wear a jacket because I have a rather large tush and wide hips. I prefer to wear skirts because I can adjust the length at will. For extended periods I usually wear 2 inch heels, especially if I plan to do some extended walking or spend a couple hours on my feet dancing or standing at an event. I have very nice legs, so I like to have my skirt at about 3-4 inches above the knee for travel and 1-2 inches below the knee for business. These help me keep firm toned thighs and a relatively tight butt. I rarely wear flats.

I generally don't wear lots of low cut tops or things that are too tight, because I do have a bit of tummy that can bulge in anything other than spanx. I like to wear pantyhose because they are easier to manage and hide little veins and things. I like to wear tight panties to keep things nice and flat. I like satin blouses because they feel nice on my neck and shoulders, I also like soft sweaters, especially cashmere.

Sometimes I like to wear leggings with a very short skirt and a long tunic sweater. It gives a scandalous look that is a bit more exciting than the leggings alone. When I wear pants, I like them long and flowing, usually with at least a 2 inch heel. I try to dress a bit more feminine on top. Even in male mode I usually wore women's pants because I had a hard time finding pants that fit my hips and my waist. Men's pants would have to be bunched up several inches around the waist, to the point where it was obvious I didn't have a man's body at all (another reason for the coat - hide the gathers). When I was a male, I also liked to tailor my shirts. My chest was very large and tapered to a small waist, but my neck was large too. Men's dress shirts looked like pup tents on me, so I would take them in at the sides. I often made my own shirts with full puffy sleeves to hide how lean and slender my arms were.

I like dangly earrings because I am more aware of my femininity when I wear them. I wear elastic bracelets because I can't get solid loop bracelets over my hand - especially around the thumb.

I usually wear a necklace with some blue or gold in them, to contrast with the rest of the clothing.

Even though I can wear lower cut blouses, when I wear a push-up bra, I prefer to keep that covered most of the time. They get enough attention from men without showing them, and women tend to frown on any attempts to show too much breast, especially if the blouse slips and shows a bit of bra. With a 38C chest, I don't have much cleavage, but I have plenty to work with, especially with a bit of help from Miss Vicky (Victoria's Secret).

For work, church, and dinners with Lee, I have to avoid dressing too much like a ****. She will not hesitate to tell me when she thinks I have gone "skank".