Smal steps

[Sarah-RT]

Just a silly post about what I got up to last night, I'll keep it brief but just to catch you's all up:

I've a friend of 10 years who lives down the street who came out as gay a few years back who I told about myself which he was great about

Well last night as silly and as minor as this is, we hung out just watching TV and films and drinking a few beers as we would often do but I was dressed this time, he's come shopping with me before but never seen me dressed and it just felt so relaxing to be able to share it with someone and feel normal.
At the start we had a laugh at how strange it was with a bit of ball busting or hazing as guys are one to do but after that just chatting away about TV or what was going on lately and then discussing a bit about myself

He was joking about my skinny jeans with the ripped knees which is popular at the moment, how pointless they seem, so naturally I got to tell him it's the fashion at the moment and tease him for not understanding how girls work( not that I'm an expert haha)

But the main parts of being able to sit with my legs crossed, or play with my hair , sitting with my hands on my lap and all the other mannerisms just felt so comfortable which has gotten me looking forward to our planned trip to an lgbt bar with another of our gay friends.

It's the small steps and little things and I've been on such a high all day especially since the last week or so i felt like I was treading back into the guilty/shamed zone.

Sarah x

[Jorja]

Good for you! It is great to have someone that you can share with and just be a friend. There is no reason for shame or guilt. You are just being you, enjoy it.

[Beverley Sims]

Sarah,
It is good that you have found a friend that understands what it is all about.

Now don't queer him by going over the top.

Always keep the conversations on subject, low key and toned down.

He will have his interests and you keep yours.

That way you will develop a solid natural relationship.

[Suzie Petersen]

That is really nice Sarah, good for you.

The best fashion accessory a crossdresser can pick to make passing easier, is to be accompanied by a guy! Just walk down the street and watch peoples behavior. People look at single women much more than they look a couples. It also adds a lot of safety, not walking around alone.

The other fantastic part of it of course, is having a friend! Nothing better.

Hugs
Suzie

[docrobbysherry]

Sometimes, it's the little things that make changing from drab to dresses feel so amazing, Sarah!

Seeing your own lipstick prints on your glass. Brushing your hair away from your mouth. The sound of your spikes on the pavement. Crossing your legs demurely when sitting. Etc. Etc. Etc.

[Sarah-RT]

Thats what I try to tell myself Jojra, and im so thankful for this forum so that we can all walk the road together knowing we are just us, people.


He will have his interests and you keep yours.

I know exactly what you mean, its very easy to just go ME ME ME, Ive realised this from ruining a relationship with the only girlfriend who found it tolerable.
When I find myself beginning to ramble on I generally switch it up to ask about his relationship with his boyfriend that has been a little choppy recently.

Suzie, I wouldnt say its easier to pass haha, im 6' 4'' and he's 5' 8'', id like to see it from a third person perspective to see how ridiculous that must look

sherry, yeah its a really nice feeling, I do it when im alone but there isnt that sense of someone else noticing you doing it and treating it like they would anything else.

[susy]

you found a friend that understand you, i don't think is a small step is a big door to your goal

[Pat]

Sarah,
Now don't queer him by going over the top.


Really? Don't queer your gay friend? I feel a t-shirt design coming on...

Sarah -- Excellent! That sounds like such a great time. Congratulations. Maybe yet another t-shirt... "This IS normal for me..." ;)

[Sarah-RT]

Susy, I wouldnt say he understands, but can relate as being an LGBT person and knows what things are like. Ive often said to him that I dont expect him to understand it, just being asked about it from time to time is nice. He joked that if I was too nervous to go to the gay bar dressed he would dress up too, I was laughing saying that he couldnt dare to steal my limelight, especially if we ended up wearing the same things


Really? Don't queer your gay friend? I feel a t-shirt design coming on...

Jennie there definitely has to be some irony in that :heehee:

''This IS normal..'' would for sure would like to have that T-shirt!

[JessicaMann]

that's AWESOME!!!! I wish I had someone in my life that I could just be a girl with!!! I have a couple of openly gay friends, but they are such "Chatty Cathy's", everyone I know would know within a few hours of me telling them!!!! and that wouldn't just hurt me.... it would hurt my wife, kids, family.... I need to make new friends!!! TRUE friends!!!!

[MsVal]

Sarah, your words convey your comfort, your relief, as you have an 'ordinary' evening with an accepting friend. Isn't that what we all want but too many lack?

Best wishes
MsVal

[Sarah-RT]

Jessica I know what you mean, I've 3 gay friends, 2 of them are a couple and while planning our trip to the lgbt club they suggested not to tell the third one because he is a Chatty Cathy .

Val, I totally agree, just being ordinary is exactly how it felt and what I'd want to continue