A word from a silent member

[eight]

I don't reply to threads very often. I have noticed a few treads of late with respect to questioning forum members activity. I am one of the members that does not provide input, so I thought I should say something. I am very guarded with respect to sharing. I am not in a position with respect to cross dressing that I can say much because I don't want to say anything that may be misconstrued in the future (I am not good with words or explaining my self and I put my foot in my mouth two often) because someone close will be reading my activity in the future. With that said, I would like to let all that do share their experiences and knowledge that you have helped me and probably many like me, with an understanding of who we are and provide the needed knowledge to answer my own questions, even if i/we don't acknowledge your words. The reason I came to this site is I found the threads were very relevant and very well moderated. Thank you from one of the silent members and this is to let you know I am here and listening.

[Valery L]

You welcome.

[pamela7]

thank you for listening :-)

[mykell]

very well said 8,
i have in the the past been called out on poor communicating skills,
just the way it is, but many left notes of support, so we just have to weed our way through what is relevant for us, but do know this...that if support is needed folks will come out of the droves and have your back, their is comfort knowing this, keep enjoying being a member.....

[Meghan4now]

That's cool Eight. I don't get the feeling that people on this forum expect anyone to participate beyond their comfort. Recent post seem like there is some nostalgic missing previously active members. And I think newer members tend to have that new car smell. No wait that's nail polish remover.

What ever you feel comfortable with, I think your welcome. And remember, your presence here is a gift to all of us.

[Beverley Sims]

Well it is nice to hear from you and there is nothing wrong with observing from the sidelines.

[Alice Torn]

You are welcome. I can relate, but i am on here a lot. but am a rejected loner in the area i live in., with no friends.

[reb.femme]

... (I am not good with words or explaining my self and I put my foot in my mouth two often)...

Hi Eight,

This site led to my developing from closet dresser to being out to my immediate family. It was extremely relevant in my life at that time as I had no other comprehensive source of information to refer to. I sometimes think the joy of language, whether spoken or written, is in its inherent ability to be misconstrued by another.

That's why, I sometimes need to check exactly which size shoe my mouth normally takes :heehee:. That's life unfortunately.

Rebecca

[Victoria StJohn]

"(I am not good with words or explaining my self and I put my foot in my mouth two often)"

Eight, I would say you expressed yourself in such a way that your quote doesn't apply anymore. Well said!

[kimdl93]

You have no obligation to comment or originate posts. It's perfectly alright to read and take away what you can.

[LRoberts]

Very well said Eight! I fit in the same category. I read most posts but feel I do not have anything to contribute. I do from time to time post.
This is a great site with so many different ideas. I do love to be a member.

[Stephanie47]

I think it is perfectly fine to get the required number of posts to get to all the segments and then enjoy. I would recommend, if there is something you really want to query, go ahead and do it. You're right about being guarded about making posts if a friend, relative or wife may get on and read everything you may have posted.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Eight, Some of us are readers and some of us are writers , If you have a question I'm sure that one of us ladies will have a great answer for you.:hugs:

I have been in this program foe 68yrs now and been a member of this wonderful forum for almost eight years now and I'm still learning .
I just wish that all of this information was available to me when I was growing up and think that I was all alone in this world.

Last week I finally got my ears double pierced it took me 72yrs to finally just do it.:daydreaming:
I don't think that I would have ever done it without the encouragement of the ladies here and their stories about that.
You can learn so much just reading our stories.

One thing that I do is clear the browsing history every time that I log off my computer. >Orchod ..0.. <Double Studs

[JayeLefaye]

Hi 8!! Thanks for taking the time to chime in.

There is, regarding our senses, input and output. The eyes and ears take in, and I'm glad that you're able to take in! Don't fret about not out-putting enough. This Site is here for us to use as needed, and ain't that pretty cool?

Jaye

[Persephone]

You are not alone, there are hundreds here who prefer to be silent readers. But if you ever need anything that any of us can provide then we are here for you.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Gardener]

eight, like you I do not comment too often and for a long time not at all. For me It was like the experience of being in a room with people speaking a different language. After time it makes sense and odd words can be said to join in. I found the site hugely helpful in terms of realising that my position and experience was not unique. To this day I marvel at those who fully dress, go out, live their lives as a female. I marvel at their ability to be convincing and also at their confidence. I have realised how we are on a gradient in terms of our opportunities and experiences and that has made me much easier with my more limited lifestyle. If ever there were expression that this site was only for those fully involved I would hope that the tolerant and Understanding majority would rise up with one voice against that.

[Nikkilovesdresses]

Hi Eight, I'm glad you reached out, if you'll excuse the expression; rest assured that you are welcome to hang out as long as you feel like it, getting what you can from the site. If you feel pressure from some members to join in more, I think it would only be friendly curiosity on their part. Be yourself- that's all that counts.

Best wishes, Nikki

[Katey888]

A timely reminder that a lot of what we write here is read by many more than are involved in the actual dialogue... and our fantasies, feelings, fears and fortitude all help to support those who still believe themselves alone in this strange passion and condition we share. It's worth everyone remembering the silent members that are there, especially those of us who can be less sensitive to others' struggles and forget that we all come here for moral support of some kind.

The only question this thread raises for me - if you're #8, have you have met #6 and do you know who #1 is..???? :D

Katey x

[Marcelle]

Hi Eight,

The good thing about a forum is that we are all here for each other and while some may write much, express deep thoughts and provide insight to questions others may have . . . other read that those thoughts, insights and advice and apply that to their own journey which in a way validates those who write . . . we are a symbiotic group to say the least and we all help one another irrespective of how we contribute . . . so thank-you for reading and just being here.

Hugs

Isha

[SandraB]

I am not in a position with respect to cross dressing that I can say much because I don't want to say anything that may be misconstrued in the future (I am not good with words or explaining my self and I put my foot in my mouth two often) because someone close will be reading my activity in the future.

Hi Eight:
I find the forum a fantastic resource just to read, to learn and help discover myself and to provide comfort and support. I also have similar concerns that you have so eloquently expressed. Aside from the risk of misconstrued thoughts because of verbal expression skills, I'm also usually reserved when expressing opinions where I don't feel competent on the subject matter. I feel I'm only a novice, as I'm at the start of a steep learning curve of discovering myself having only recently accepted my CD'ing.

However, despite the concerns, I'm finding the process of writing to respond or start a thread helps organise and focus my thoughts on a specific idea or aspect. I can then kind of take this idea, extract it from the 'spaghetti' of ideas floating around in my head and reference it later especially when I need to articulate my thoughts to my wife.

Like you, I'm concerned that someone close to me will read my activity at some future date and provide access to my most privately held inner thoughts or worse still miscontrue such a thought. Should this happen and if the person is truly close to me I would expect that they would raise any concerns to me. If I've been true to myself in my expressed thoughts and considering the context and frame of mind at the time of expressing those thoughts, I would hope I can address any raised concerns.
This is just to share my perspective on the very real concerns you raise. Also to let you know you have helped me in raising this thread as it has helped me focus on this concern.

Whether you just browse or occasionally contribute to the threads, I'd like to join the others in extending my welcome.

[Teresa]

Eight,
Whether you read or write you've found the forum useful for your needs, please continue what you're doing if that's what you choose to do !
I understand your reservations about being caught out if you say the wrong thing, it's easy to forget that part of the forum is totally open !
I know I'm guilty of this, I guess wanting to discover what makes me and other CDers tick is more important than the chances of someone visiting the forum that knows me !
I may still pay the price for this indiscretion but at least I have some answers in my defense !