Jury Duty - Bittersweet, mixed feelings, don't believe everything you read

[Michelle789]

Today I served jury duty for the first time as my authentic self. I was summoned initially six months ago, and I was scared of going.

I was worried about being placed on a jury for a trial that would last too long, and being so early in my transition that it could interfere with my job or my transition. I was unable to request a medical excuse, but I did get a postponement until this week, buying me six more months to transition, and work, before serving.

In California, we are placed on call for a whole week, and we have to check in every night before to see if we need to report. The summons said to go to downtown LA courthouse. I checked on Sunday night and it said that I did not have to report on Monday. I checked again on Monday night and didn't have to report on Tuesday. I didn't need to report on Wednesday nor Thursday. I figured, by end of day yesterday, that I was just waiting to not get called and to have my jury service over for the year. Well guess what, I check last night and I was asked to report this morning at 9:30, at a different court house, further away from my house than downtown. I was really freaking out last night about having to get stuck on a trial that would last for weeks, missing my therapy appointment next week, missing work, and having to drive a ridiculously long distance every day for court.

I was torn because a part of me wanted to serve jury duty as my authentic self, and a part of me was resentful and was just looking for an excuse not to have to go. So I went this morning, after having trouble sleeping last night.

Traffic was no where near as bad as I thought. I have driven that route in the past in the morning and evening rush hours and it can be downright brutal. But I ended up getting there in 35 minutes rather than 90 like I originally thought. Haha!!!

I got there earlier than I needed to. When I walked into the jury assembly room and gave the woman there my jury duty badge, she checked me in. I then told her that I go by a different name than the one on the badge. She told me that we must go by your legal name. I remember talking to another transwoman friend who had served jury duty 6-7 years ago, and like me, was in early transition and had not yet legally changed her name or gender. She said they had no problems calling her by her preferred name. So immediately I suspected that I was being discriminated against for being trans by this woman. She was a Hispanic female. She then wrote down Michelle on a sticker and placed it over my summons, but told me that they will probably call you by your legal name.

I was really infuriated by that, but didn't make any noise. I just texted Cody and Paula and my friend who had served jury duty years earlier, and I got responses back from them.

Anyways, an hour and a half goes by, and they finally start calling names. I was anxiously awaiting to see if I was going to be picked to go through the jury questioning process - called voir dire for those who have never experienced it. I was also anxiously awaiting to see which name they would call me by. After like 25 names, they called Michelle (my last name). I said "yes". There was a pause. The woman who was calling the names then said, "Michelle, please disregard...You are not on the panel." I was pleasantly surprised she actually called me Michelle, but immediately became suspicious about why they called my name, and then told me to disregard. She proceeded to call about 10 more names, and then asked everyone whose name was called to report.

Only six of us were not called. The remaining 35 were called to go on the jury panel. Of the six of us, five of us were women (me being trans, of course!!!). About 10 minutes later, the woman then called the remaining six names, and asked if we were all here. She called me by Michelle. She then said, "your jury service is complete" and we were sent home. I will not have to serve again for at least another year.

As we walked out of the jury assembly room, one of the women asked her why we weren't selected, like what were the reasons. She than said that your names were selected by a computer. She then said that my name was #36 on the list and she mistakenly called me because they only needed the first 35. I just laughed but didn't say anything. I knew that was a bunch of b.s. because she called 10 more names after my name, so obviously my name wasn't #36. It seemed to me like my name came up in the first 35 and she told me to disregard because she is transphobic, and probably so are most of the people there.

This whole experience was bittersweet. I am glad that I got to serve enough jury duty to say that I have gone as my authentic self, and that I did not actually get selected, and that I got dismissed very early. I left at 11:30, which was the earliest I had ever been dismissed from jury duty. In the past, I was once selected to go through voir dire and had to come back a second day before I was dismissed, and the other two times I remained in the court until 4 pm when they dismissed the rest of us. I feel saddened about being potentially (but not 100% certain) that I was discriminated against for being transgender. It just reminded me painfully that we have a long way to go, if ever, for achieving transgender equality, and that I have a long way to go, if ever, I pass. I'm not sure if she read me on my male name - my male name is pretty androgynous sounding - so she may have read me on something else, and I didn't verbally say transgender either. Ironically, the parking attendant and the guy who did the X-rays and metal detectors both greeted me as "ma'am", and both were Hispanic males.

I've been consistently gendered properly for the past two months. The last time I was mis-gendered by a stranger, excluding over the phone, was well over two months ago. Prior to that I used to get misgendered more frequently than that. I'm not sure if I'm starting to pass better, or if people are just incredibly polite, or if I just was extremely lucky the past two months to get gendered correctly 100% of the time. I would have assumed the men would be more likely to misgender me than the women, but I guess I'm wrong. Actually, my past experience is that I have been more likely to be misgendered by women than by men, which is ironic, because men have a reputation for being more transphobic. And Hispanic males have a reputation of extreme machismo, but perhaps Hispanic males are also more polite. I kinda think male behavior tends towards extremes, with men being either very trans accepting or very transphobic, being very polite or very rude, while women tend towards the center. But hey, maybe my assumptions are completely wrong.

The other thing is don't believe everything you read either. Six months ago, I read this article that made it sound like it was illegal to discriminate against transgender people for jury duty in California. This article is nearly three years old.

http://www.queerty.com/did-you-know-its-legal-to-discriminate-against-lgbt-jurors-we-didnt-20120501

The way this article is worded "only California and Oregon have rules prohibiting such decisions based on sexual orientation or gender presentation" it sounds like it's illegal to discriminate in California for being transgender. However, today I found another article which implies that it is still legal to discriminate against transgender jurors. The article, which was dated a few weeks ago, states that California is trying to pass a law making it illegal to discriminate against transgender jurors.

http://www.lgbtqnation.com/2015/03/california-may-ban-discrimination-against-transgender-jurors/

So, ah ha, it is still legal to discriminate against transgender jurors in California. Or maybe there was a law 3 years ago that was repealed, and now they're going to try to pass it again. Who really knows?

So everyone, thank you for listening to my long rant. I am glad to be done with jury duty, but I feel mixed emotions about being possibly discriminated against today for being transgender.

[Persephone]

Forgive me, Michelle, but I think you are placing too much emphasis on things.

Was there something specific in her attitude that caused you to think she was being discriminatory? Or was it just her assumption that you would have to be called by your legal name?

Are you sure she wasn't calling the names in alphabetical order and that therefore yours got called before some others? If a computer made the random selection it is quite possible that it spit out the names in alpha order with the number next to the name.

A year or so ago I was called and had to report. They were very nice and as soon as I asked them to use my female name they did so. I was called for voir dire and no one, attorneys nor judge, even looked at me oddly. Eventually I was dismissed, not because I was transgendered but because in questioning I expressed an opinion one of the attorneys definitely didn't like.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Jorja]

Maybe you were discriminated against and maybe you weren't. It doesn't matter, you did not have to sit on the jury. You are done for at least the next year. Rejoice! Besides that, who really knows how they select jurors? I think they place all the names in a hat and draw one at a time. Or maybe there is some type of magical dance and the names just come to them. Maybe they use tea leaves? Good luck trying to figure it out.

[Ann Louise]

I'd be tempted to keep my emotional power dry for another day, like when an in-your-face transbigot event occurs, rather than an oblique blow like this one might have been.

[RADER]

You said that the rest of the people where girls;
Maybe the Lawyers did not want grills on the jury.
You can never understand lawyers.
Rader

[DebbieL]

Jury selection is a grueling process, because the prosecutors are looking for jurors who are more likely to convict, conservatives, businessmen, and prosecutors often research jurors when they are added to the pool. Defense attorneys are looking for people who are more likely to acquit or at least hang the jury. I've actually been on one jury for a civil trial, and it was interesting because the civil suit involved an old woman who was jogging on a snowy sidewalk and slipped. The woman's lawyer was hoping for a sympathetic jury who would watn to give the sweet old lady more retirement money. We looked at the pictures and realized hat she had taken several sliding steps so she knew the sidewalks were slippery, and the distance between the steps in relation to the size of the shoe prints suggested that she had been running. The Jury decided that the insurance company's offer to pay for all medical expenses was generous and adaquate.

One of my hardest jury duties was when I had to go to downtown Denver every day and wait the entire day. To make things even more interesting I was a witness in a robbery trial the same week. I couldn't talk to anyone because one of them might be on my robbery case, and the defense would say I tainted the jury. I had to keep my head down, read books, and even avoid others at lunch.

Sometimes, the attorneys go through the jury pool and end up negotiating a plea bargain or settlement because neither side is comfortable with the jury but can't dismiss them for cause.

[Eryn]

A couple of things I've learned from jury duty, mostly from watching other folks get into trouble:

Don't anger the lady in the jury assembly room. They randomize their picks, but if you anger them you may become a lot less random than you would like.

Don't anger the judges. They run the show and have many ways to punish you.

Remember, no matter how much they talk about the jury being the key component of their system, they don't have much actual respect for us. How much respect can lawyers and judges have when the entire jury is paid less per day than one lawyer makes in an hour? It's all a game to them and they don't like it when their pawns don't do what they want.

Michelle, you did well to walk out unscathed.

[becky77]

I'm not sure I see anything particularly discriminatory in that?
Also you are going to a legal establishment and asking to not use your legal name, why haven't you changed it yet?
Is it possible with the name issue it was easier for them, to just dismiss you than get it wrong and then you complain of discrimination.
And the whole jury process is one of selection and discrimination anyway, where anyone can be sent away because they don't like the way you look, an answer you gave, gender etc etc.
Perhaps on that occasion they were looking for a male bias.

A lawyer just sees you as one of many, it could be as simple as the name issue. You are using an assumed name that doesn't match up to your legal name, that can put an element of doubt in your credibility, how do they know you are a transitioning trans-woman?

[charlenesomeone]

Michelle you at least did your civic duty and served. Good for you. Be proud of that.
Hugs

[Rogina B]

Walks like a Duck. Quacks like a Duck.And wants to be called a Duck. That works everywhere except the legal system...No big deal and will help you grow a thicker skin each time you push yourself into new territory.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

I don't see it...i'm with some of the others..chin up girl!
It was a non event. I hope you can realize that and move on, i hope you are open to the comments that tell you to step back and regroup and move on while being less sensitive..

you make alot of assumptions in your post about things like Hispanic people and "male behavior"...stereotyping people leaves you primed to pounce on perceived slights and open to misconstruing behavior towards you...

you know the world does not "owe" us even one little thing...people are people and will do what people do... sometimes its awful but instances of true discrimination are not common, and should be set apart and dealt with aggressively

..if we get bent out of shape at every little thing perceived or real, its not helpful and in the end its only going to make you feel worse...

i'd walk out of there delighted to not have to spend all that time and pleased with the person's willingness to accept you as a woman and used your name regardless of whether she understood the legalities or not..

[stefan37]

You want to be called and known as your female name? Then petition the court to change it. Until you do that your are legally known by your male name. You can request that they call you your chosen name, but they are under no obligation to do so. I have my name legally changed for 18 months. There are still some legal issues where the papers are drawn female name aka male name. When I got divorced the papers were ex spouse vs female name aka male name. It will be the same with SRS. All my legal documents except birth certificate say female. But legally they have to use the legal birth gender on my certificate.

Until you legally change your name your SSN will be tied to your legal male name. Bank accounts, loans, mortgages etc will all have to be in your male name until you get a court order to change it.

[Sammy777]

Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar :heehee:

There are plenty of fights you will need to fight, no need to go looking for anymore of them.
If you were a FAB woman would you have gotten this upset over thinking the situation or thought nothing of it?

[donnalee]

Michele, you just dodged a bullet, girl. It's something to rejoice over, not be saddened by; cheer up!

[Angela Campbell]

Probably best to stop looking for signs of discrimination. Until you transition there will be awkward moments for you and others out there. It isn't discrimination when you get pushback when the name you want to use isn't your name.