What Happened To Them

[deebra]

Where are the long time regulars that use to post all the time on here, I would love to mention names but the moderators might object. One probially was the top poster and another received tons of compliments on how great she looked.

[Kelley]

I have wondered the same thing. I think some are still lurking around here.

Kelley

[Kate Simmons]

Off to see the Wizard maybe? :battingeyelashes::)

[Stephanie47]

I remember some of the names and check to see if I just missed a post or two. Nope! They seem to be gone.

[Bethany_Anne_Fae]

There arte a few missing to be sure :(

[alwayshave]

While I have only been on the forum for four years, I have noticed a change in those who use to post and those who now post. I can only hope that they have reached some crossdressing nirvana and no longer require the support of other like souls. However, even if that was the case one would hope they would stick around to provide sage advice.

[Suzie Petersen]

Sometimes life gets in the way, sometimes things just get old.

- Suzie

[nvlady]

I could name at least five that I wonder about.
I think probably there are many other things that come along and eat into the cd computer time.

[Tracii G]

A few I know of have left on their own.

[Adriana Moretti]

Not that I have been around here long...but I see a cycle....seems every 3 months you get a fresh crop of gals, while those from 3 months ago drop off only to return a year later after already claiming they are DONE with this CD thing....the regulars here are awesome, ocassionally I see one or two drop off....but like me they probably get bored of all the pantie threads....

[rachellegsep]

The ones that come to mind are the lady that coined the term "frequently flying pretty" , " Thou shalt not wear denim jeans " and what became of the comedian who went off to seek her fame & fortune.

[Yoshisaur]

Some of them might just be reading the posts instead of posting things themselves.

[Teresa]

Deebra,
I would say Adriana is right there is a cycle of new members joining and senior members fading off somewhere!
If you look back through the archives the subject matter does tend to repeat itself , you may reply a couple of times and then pass it over ! I guess the more that happens some members appear to drop out !
Some members I miss, many of us had fun with Ellie from Perth WA, she had great style and a great sense of humour ! Others I'm glad to see go, they come and and rub people's backs up with abrasive comments and then fail to respond when members fire back ! I guess the mods probably have a PM with them suggesting they stop what they're doing or take their abusive keyboard elsewhere !
I could name some names, I'd get my wrists slapped but most of us know who I mean !

[pamela7]

only been here since January but i feel the same thing on cycle, for the last month i've felt less urge to post, more at peace with my self and my understanding, i've spoken on most things i need to speak on, visiting less others have often said what i'd have said before i get there.

I feel this is a bit like "high school" or "college", we join as freshers to coin the American term, have our initiations, graduate and move on to experiencing life comfortable in our CD skins/dresses. Speaking of which, welshgirl agrees i need a lot more short skirts, oh dear, how sad, i can feel a shopping experience coming on!!!

xxx Pamela

[Teresa]

Pamela,
I partly agree with you but we should help as well as be helped !
I think it's great that members like Isha still find the time to greet new members, she was the first friend I made here and still value that !

[pamela7]

yes, Teresa, I agree and i'm here to do that, and i do, gratitude experienced for all the free support here is a true gift in the ever-so material world we inhabit. If more gratitude were experienced we could move into a world without money, but that's another topic entirely.

[Marcelle]

Hi Deebra,

It is likely many of the regular posters are still active but doing more reading and posting responses to other threads vice starting their own. As many have said the subject matter of the forum is cyclical with one or two "new takes" on old themes but eventually you get to a point where starting new threads is difficult because you might feel you are just "rinse and repeat". There are others who have left and that may be because they have gone on to other forums, life gets in the way, they may be on a purge or a whole host of potential reasons. Some wander back eventually others do not.

Hugs

Isha

[Charona]

I have noticed the same sort of cycle on other forums. I used to follow a forum dedicated to a specific motorcycle, until I sold mine. Just as with panty threads here, the same threads about aftermarket exhausts and the "need" to rejet carburetors kept popping up. New posters who had just purchased that bike popped up with a question or two, then faded away. I follow a forum about a particular brand of firearms, and the same cycle occurs there. There seems to be a relatively small cadre of "regulars" who keep the forum alive, much like the usually small number of members of any club who do most of the work. I haven't seen the problem here, but sometimes those "regulars" can get pretty nasty to newcomers, which tends to drive them away.

Some forums permit members to close their accounts; others do not. I suspect the software "powering" the forum has some effect there, as it might not allow deleting linked records. Advertising might be involved, too, as ad rates probably depend at least a little on the number of members who might potentially notice the ads.

[jennifer easton]

I can relate, after a year or two of wandering out away from support and friends, and the crash of my puter along with no internet I found my way back, for how long, who knows
but is good to touch base every now and then xoxoxox Jenni

[Kate Simmons]

Sometimes I get a bit burnt out and tempted to leave as many of the same subjects are addressed over and over again. I mostly stay, however, because of my friends here. Consider that.:)

[Heidi Stevens]

When you think about it, there can be several reasons to disappear. Some get burned out and lurk for a while, some get involved in other things in their lives. Others think that this is not for them. And then there are those you hope did not hurt themselves. The reasons can be as diverse as we all are. But yes, I do wonder about those I got to know better and why the just left with no word.

[deebra]

Just hope they haven't given up sliping on a pair of panties and hooking a bra, can't imagine anyone stopping that.

[donnalee]

Having been here a bit longer than many, I have often wondered about the many missing; seems like the most prolific posters and OPs are the ones to go; we have also had our share of "creative writers" here. some of whom have been asked to leave.
For me, this has been a place to gain knowledge and information about a late-realized idiosyncrasy that required further information and thought; it also became a forum for self expression and a way to work on writing skills that had been under-utilized for years.
I still don't originate many threads, preferring to comment on others; after you've been here more than a couple of years you start to realize just how few original threads their actually are.
Another reason that I am still here is that I went through a long period of profound depression after my SO's death 4 years ago, really had little interest in going out of the house and lost touch with friends as sooner or later (mostly sooner) the subject of her death would come up and nobody wants to associate with someone depressed and depressing for very long, no matter how well intentioned they may be. This forum became my only outlet, my friends and fellow members treated my angst with a sympathetic ear and a figurative pat on the shoulder and did not reject what I had to say. I had had a horrible experience with a so-called "therapist" (a psychiatrist no less) and absolutely refuse to visit another for any reason whatsoever. The site provided an ear where I was anonymous but not unknown and could vent to my heart's content and the other members were at least non-judgemental but mostly sympathetic.

[Victoria Demeanor]

Well haven't been a member for very long, but I have seen people post quite often and then seeming disappear. I know that I am guilty of that. I believe there are several things going on and you have all already answered these, and much better then I can, which leads to item one. For me I always feel like the late comer, when I see a tread that interest me, so many of you have already answered them so eloquently and I think I could only add "Ditto". I have also found that I have met some wonderful friends here that I correspond with on a regular basis which keeps me preoccupied. I do, do more lurking theses days as I found this site is comforting to me. I am always here reading post and checking out whats new, this place and you all feel like a family to me. Like others have mentioned though life does sometime get in the way.

[Debra Russell]

some are still posting - facebook - there own blog or else where, I have found a few and there are still alive and active......................Debra

[Isabella Ross]

I think people do sign up and absolutely go nuts posting for the first while...it's a relief to finally find yourself among like-minded people after a life of denial. After that initial burst, people sometimes feel that they've been "helped" by the forum and its members, in terms of accepting and getting to a better place. And then their activity tends to tail off a little. That's the case with me...I don't stop in here twice a day anymore. But I love dropping in every couple of days and reading about what's going on, and saying hello to friends...

[Dani0948]

I too miss the long time regulars. Maybe some are a bit like me. I log on most every day, but don't often post (110 posts since Dec 2012). I don't always have something to say, but I still enjoy reading many of the posts (even some of the pantie posts).

[Dana44]

I've seen some come back. It seems that one gets burned out on the threads. Also the moderators keep everything pretty bland. So I think that threads are somewhat predictable on what is said. It is good to help the new ones though with important questions. Especially the new GG's that are bewildered. The site is also good to read for many answers that one may have. All in all, I would like too hear from some real old timers on the site.

[Amy Fakley]

Yeah. I suppose it's bad form to mention them by name, but I too wonder what became of some of the ladies I've met here over the last few years. That talented comedian whose warm-hearted and hilarious videos helped smooth me through a few rough patches, I wonder about her often. Also several among us who realized it was much deeper than CD, and appeared to be on the expressway to transitionhood, who just fell off the board (one presumes real life must have taken over). Guess that's just the nature of a community such as ours.

It is wonderful that a place like this even exists. It is a tremendous public service, and a powerfully positive force in the world. Long may you live, crossdressers.com :-)

[cheryl reeves]

i was pretty active among forums from 01-03 then we moved and my son had friends dropping in so i went stealth for 12 yrs and we moved to the country and decided it eas time for cheryl again. sometimes life gets in the way and one has to make sacrifices along the way,now that im going to turn 50 and its me and the wife again we finally have some free time,just not the money..lol

[Crissy Kay]

While I do not post much, I do try to stop by the forum to see what's going on. I have noticed that since my dressing has slowed down over the last couple months, I have visited here somewhat less then I did before. It may be a matter of losing interest for a little while.

[Krisi]

There could be several reasons for drifting away or suddenly going away. Many of the threads are the same old thing over and over again. "I want to wear panties, how can I tell my wife? What are you wearing right now? How do I tell my wife I've been crossdressing for the last twenty years? Which dress/blouse/shoes look best on me? Where can I buy breast forms and what size should I get?

Some may be in a relationship situation that prevents them from crossdressing or participating in this forum. Some of us may have passed away or gone to a home. Some may have gotten fed up with the arguments or nasty private messages.

And of course some may have just quit crossdressing and moved on to other interests.

[CynthiaD]

After a while it gets hard to think up new things to say. Crossdressing is just getting dressed after all. How many different things can you say about it?

Let's see ... If you were writing a story about a mouse, a dog and a talking parrot who were making a journey across the country on foot, and the dog was a mtf crossdresser, what would you have him wear? (I really don't want to know.) :)

[Meghan4now]

It's bad to mention their names? Like Sauron? Or Betelgeuse?

I don't care. Hutton. Hutton. Hutton. Now she has to show up!

[flatlander_48]

Nothing in Life is static, and for us transgender folks, that probably goes double. We grow, we evolve, we come to a richer understanding of the notion of gender.

I guess my path just had to different. In almost 10 years, I wouldn't be surprised if less than 20% of my posts were in the first 5 years. For some, it's just not the same journey...

DeeAnn

[MissTee]

My needs to post ebb and flow. Driven more by my schedule than anything else.

[Michelle789]

People come and go. Personally I used to post regularly throughout the end of 2014, and then life got busy and I just have't had time in the recent months. I've been sick with bronchitis, taking time off from work, and resting, so I've been back a bit lately. I am TS, and I go back and forth between posting on the TS and MTF CD forum. Lately there have been some really interesting threads started on the MTF CD side that I have enjoyed participating in, so I've been here more than the TS side. Late last year and early this year I was more on the TS side since I was going through some heavy transition related stuff. I really hope I get better soon, and that when I get better that I'll have time for Cody, work, socializing, AA, church, to run errands, post here, and sleep (and anything else I need or want to do in life :)

[Stephanie101]

Sometimes the SO objects to all the "social media" time..

[steftoday]

Some of "them" are still around, and can be found in other corners of the Internet. A few have disappeared and left old, outdated websites and blogs. The only constant is change.

[MelanieAnne]

It seems that one gets burned out on the threads. Also the moderators keep everything pretty bland. So I think that threads are somewhat predictable on what is said.
I think a couple got banned. They don't get a chance to say goodbye.
And you can only post so much about crossdressing.

[GretchenJ]

I myself, wondered the same thing myself just last night. Personally I have gone from lurker, to participant , to sort of semi-lurker. Primary , due to lack of really anything new to say. There has been a relative lull in the opportunity to venture out. But I still read what's going on.

Cyclic is definitely the word to describe it. I have noticed that the people who have joined the same time that I have , have also backed down there post count. Very strange

[Lorileah]

I've seen some come back. It seems that one gets burned out on the threads. You've been here for three months? Have you been here before?
Also the moderators keep everything pretty bland. :thinking: We don't choose the subject matter we just keep it from getting out of control .. You guys are the ones who post the threads (and now may be a VERY good time to review the part about questioning the mods here in the FAQ).
All in all, I would like too hear from some real old timers on the site. How old would that be?


OK kids this comes up every 6 months (which of course the old timers knew). After being on here for awhile you start to see the same questions, the same answers and the same posts about SOs and what clothing you wear. People leave. The FAQs state that you can't close your account, so they just quit posting. Simple enough. Transsexuals often don't want any ties after SRS. Some people find new places to talk. There are a thousand reasons. So why is it an issue?

But you see, there is this thing called a PM and Email. If you REALLY cared about those who no longer post here, you could have gotten their email, of Facebook name, or blog name just by asking, when you friend them or after talking to them for awhile. I am one of the old timers, I guess. I still communicate with many people who were here when I started.

In RE: the GGs that are bewildered. So often they get such negative feedback from the other members, they don't stay. Would you stay if every time you posted, you were barraged by people telling you it is your fault you don't understand?

[LeslieSD]

People come and go. Similar topics get recycled. So much the same way human history goes. :)

Still you never know, once in a while, someone would post inspiring thoughts, or share encouraging experience. It is more often not really about new stories (how many variations can it be), but of having a community of people who share something in common. People (even crossdressers) do not like to feel lonely, I guess.

[Persephone]

The ones that come to mind are the lady that coined the term "frequently flying pretty" , " Thou shalt not wear denim jeans " and what became of the comedian who went off to seek her fame & fortune.

Definitely would love to know where those are and if they are O.K. There is one other who made frequent purchases at White House/Black Market and who did awesome writeups of her adventures.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Jane P]

The moderators do an incredible job of keeping things " normal " around here , and I for one thank you all for that . Talk about a thankless job .

Keeping things private and to ourselves is why many of us find ourselves here in the first place , and while we may open the flood gates upon arrival we may revert to the relative calm of silence. For those who have helped me and are no longer visible ; thank you so much , I hope you are enjoying a wonderful life. For those who were spiteful , inconsiderate and generally made others feel miserable about themselves ; thank you to our wonderful moderators and articulate members for making their voices disappear .

[Jorja]

It's bad to mention their names? Like Sauron? Or Betelgeuse?

I don't care. Hutton. Hutton. Hutton. Now she has to show up!

OMG, hide your jeans!!! :)

To be quite honest deebra, times have been tough. We had to sell off most if not all of the more popular people so we could pay the bills.

[Lorileah]

To be quite honest deebra, times have been tough. We had to sell off most if not all of the more popular people so we could pay the bills.:devil:


Kimberley is still working and flying, Karren is still working and playing hockey and Jessica Who went on to be a comedian. You are not allowed to post leaving threads so they have to just disappear.

[Sandra]

We are not their keepers, if they have the email permission in their profile you can always send them one.

Thread closed.