As a CD, Can you have too many female clothes?

[Ellie52]

I am so lucky in having an accepting wife, one who buys me anything I would like. I have taken advantage of her generosity for many years but lately we are running out of storage room.
We have a walk in robe (Closet) that is stacked with 99% female clothing. We have 4 x chests of drawers in our bedroom stacked with clothes. And boxes and boxes of shoes. (Mariaheels knows all about this one)
She has 3 x drawers full of bras and I have 1 + 1 full of panties. I have another full of camisoles, garters and teddy's from the 80's era.
We have basques and hats and allsorts of things that I dont even know the names of.

My dilemma is, what do we get rid of? Everything has a meaning to me. I have tried to rationalize what we have but I dont want to throw anything away.
I have mini skirts which aren't age appropriate any more and stuff that went out of fashion in the 80's. We (Both to blame for this one) have so many shoes we cannot ever wear them all.
I was looking for something for my wife to wear this morning (She likes me to choose her weekend clothes) and I noticed she's got skirts with the labels still attached!!!!And shoe boxes that still sealed.
So, we (as a pair) are addicted to shopping but only have so much space. We dont want to get rid of anything as we love it all.
It is so much fun shopping together but I have a couple of questions.

1) Should we seek therapy?
2) Should we continue shopping?
3) Does anyone know of a good builder to increase our closet space?

This post is meant lightheartedly but shows the problem when an accepting wife allows her husband to buy any clothes he likes.
Its akin to a kid in a sweet shop, and it is very addictive.

Can anyone answer the question "Can you have too many female clothes"?

Life should be fun - even when your old....
Ellie

[Roli F]

yup being CD costs over twice as much to run two wardrobes of gear M & F. I have more heels than male shoes lol. :D

[Maria 60]

I don't know why, but I can't throw anything out, my boss once told me he came to this country with nothing and his biggest fear is going back and living like that. That's when I realized that's why I collect and can't throw anything out, maybe because when I was younger I had such a hard time to get a piece of fem clothing, now I want so much of it and fear of going back and not having any at all.

[Lauracd]

I have more women's clothes then men's clothes and can't throw any of my women's clothes away. It's taken so long to collect my wardrobe and can't part with it.

[EllenJo]

I don't think you can have to many women's clothes as long as your wife is fine with it and you can afford it. If it is just compulsive buying then that is something different.

Hugs
Ellen Jo

[Sammy777]

If it's no longer "age appropriate", went completely out of style 20+ years ago (with no sight of it ever coming back into fashion), if its too big, too small or something you thought looked great but haven't looked at it, let alone worn it in the last year, or three, lol.
Then get rid of it. Sell it, Donate it, do something with it.
Sure, we all have certain items of clothing (for one reason or another) that we can't seem to part with, but there has to be a limit, lol.


Look at it this way - imagine all the fun new stuff you can buy with the money from selling what you will never wear again :D

[Rhonda Darling]

Watch a few episodes of the TV show "Hoarders" and if you don't see yourselves in the characters they document, then consider jointly going to therapy. See: http://www.mylifetime.com/shows/hoarders

good luck

[LucyNewport]

Being a hoarder is one of my worst nightmares! We have severely limited closed space so everything has to justify the space it uses. My SO and I are constantly getting rid of stuff. It's a good feeling to get rid of old clothes actually. Make room for the new!

[reb.femme]

I suppose it's a "too much clothing situation", only if you never wear a lot of it. Otherwise, you're really down to your third option, does anyone know of a good builder? I find it hard to throw stuff out too and also have the need to buy shoes, boots and sandals to match various outfits. Unfortunately, I throw one item out for a minimum of two items coming in.

I do seem to have an inordinate amount of girl stuff just lately and is certainly now, a larger collection than my male gear. Isn't life great? :heehee:

Rebecca

[rocketscientist]

Time for dress up! Stop purchasing new items and start going through what you already have. See what fits and what doesn't. If you have multiple red tops, find out which work best for you and get rid of the others. And so on. I can really sympathize with your plight too. I am facing much the same dilemma, though I do not have a wife. I shop waaay too much and am running out of space to put stuff. I cannot even tell you how many pairs of shoes I own anymore as I haven't counted them in years (last count was a few years ago, almost 300). At least 40 pair of jeans, countless tops and skirts, dresses and accessories. But, I suppose there are much worse problems to have! Aw hell, I'm not sure what to do either! Maybe we both need larger houses?

[bridget thronton]

If I never wear it I donate it (after analyzing why I never wear it)

[sometimes_miss]

When you're closet is full, and your suitcases are too, you have too many clothes. Simple. Just move to a bigger house (See: George Carlin's 'too much stuff')

I was looking for something for my wife to wear this morning (She likes me to choose her weekend clothes) and I noticed she's got skirts with the labels still attached!!!!And shoe boxes that still sealed.
So, we (as a pair) are addicted to shopping
Women are notorious for shopping until the money runs out (at least, that's been my experience). My ex also would routinely go out shopping with her friend and come home with a load of stuff, which never saw the outside of her closet. Some type of unique pleasure in acquiring things, I guess.

[BillieAnneJean]

Can we have too may clothes?

Also can we have too many shoes?

Even the thought is heresy.

BUT we might have a problem when your closet looks like a store!

So please take this as a humorous confession:
I have over 140 skirt suits. Over 140 separate skirts (not part of those skirt suits). Probably a like number of tops. Maybe a dozen formals. Probably a couple dozen coats. Maybe fifty camisoles. Probably thirty purses. Maybe 75 pairs of shoes. All in a "closet" and dressing room specifically for Billie that is 18X24 feet. With 40 feet of closet rod. And I keep buying and wearing. Why? Because I love putting together the "perfect" (to me) outfit. Color coordinated from the hat to the heels. Other than the shoes, pretty much everything came from thrift stores. I am at a point where I am very selective about what I buy. It has to be something unique, something that works very well competing an outfit I already have. Or a suit or dress that looks great and I have the shoes, purse, hat, and bling to go with it. And it has to be really cheap. Like $6 for a dress. $8 for a suit. $3 for a purse. So I may be out at resale stores all day and not find anything. Other times I might find three unique outfits for less than $25 total. So the hunt goes on but it is not intense nor expensive any more. I have arrived at the point where I have everything I "need". I don't "want" anything additional. But if I find something that is great and cheap and works and looks good, then I might buy it.

I admit. I love this. When I do a day out enfemme, I change outfits during the day. That way I get to enjoy maybe three looks each day. It is all just fun.

My advice for newbies is to avoid the expensive stores. Avoid the mail order places. Go to the resale stores and look for unique items that will become an outfit one day. Collect some really nice pieces. As you go along you will remember what you have and find other pieces that work with what you already have, thereby creating an outfit. The resale skirts tend to be $3 to $4 around here. The blouses are around $3. So an outfit becomes $6-7. A dress is around $6. A skirt suit is around $6-7. So you can see that my 140 skirt suits cost about $1000 total. My 140 skirts cost about $560. My 100 blouses cost about $300. I realize that the resale stores on the coasts cost more. This whole CDing thing can be done at bargain prices. You just have to be persistent and patient. I am sewing now, altering what I find (if it is unique, cheap, looks good, etc) and changing the color of shoes that I bought cheap to make color coordinated outfits. The shoes are $15 - $30 new from Shoe Carnival.

My motive is to show that this can be done without spending the life savings. You can have a huge wardrobe and wear it all.

I am having SUCH FUN!

[Tracy Hazel Lee]

While I completely understand the urge and satisfaction of shopping and buying new clothes and items... However, I simply can not get my head around why anyone would purchase something, only to bring it home and ignore it.... I too have seen clothing items and shoe boxes in my SO's closet that have never been touched (based on the tags still being present).

This is incomprehensible to me. When I buy new clothes, chances are very high that I'll be wearing that item that night, or very soon after, like the next day or within a few days. And in some cases when the situation permits, the moment I get home from the store!

[Jenniferathome]

Ellie, my wife is accepting as well but that is no reason to "collect" clothing rather than having a wardrobe that works.

It would seem that many cross dressers keep clothes as a trophy of sorts. But clothes are fashion and they come and go. One should pare the wardrobe down at the change of each season. Keep the staples and lose the rest.

[Krististeph]

There is a balance between hoarding and having. I've been chastised for having over 100 pairs of hose. but I can go a year without buying stuff.

let's face it- we missed out on girlhood- and we are making up for it.

This is one of the reasons i understand students go who go ape$hit on a subject- they are making up for lost time. With gentle guidance- we help them turn the obsession into something positive. Why can't we do this with crossdressing? I hem more clothes for my wife than her mother did. I have several original closet/storage ideas i've built into the house. She looks to me for fashion ideas and help- and trusts me. That is valuable to me as a husband, a CD, and a CD husband!

But yes, there are time when it is overdone. Older clothes, especially ones that have sentimental value- first outfit you felt you could 'pass' in, or your first 'real' outfit or suit or uniform...

Best thing to do is to follow the guides for GGs, and it depends on your available space.

When i finish the basement, i'm starting on a sub-basement for storage and machine tools. (I may paint them shimmery purple)...

140 suits? that might be excessive- but if you have the room, and if it truly brings you comfort, okay. Just make sure you are not exclusively stuck on that as a source of enjoyment, I might say.

You want a balance between the fun/fad/experimental stuff, and the solid basics. Get some of each, and toss or donate what does not work.

We really should set up a cd clothing exchange. Outside of ebay, I mean. :-)

[Barbara Black]

Okay, so maybe we need a crossdresser's bargain basement store on Crossdressers.com? Perhaps this would lessen the separation anxiety? LOL

[Jorja]

It depends on how big your closet is and how much money you have. My closet is the entire 3rd floor of a 5000 sqft home. I don't have a problem. I am not a hoarder!

"Their coming to take me away ha ha ho ho he he"

[Stephanie47]

Yes, it is possible to have too many feminine clothing items or masculine items. If you are buying to wear the clothes, rather than collect clothes, then, yes it possible to have too many. I have too many dresses. I'm sure there are many on this forum who have many more than I. I chuckle a little when I read a post of a forum member stashing her wardrobe in a suitcase in the attic. I have to maintain a word document listing my 118 dresses of which there are printouts of pictures in a binder. I do that so I can make a decision on what to wear and coordinate the dress with the proper undergarments. I'm sure, if I pass away today, my wife would just fall over.

I think one may become a collector of a certain feminine garment. I love slips. I have over four hundred slips. Many, instead of collecting a garment, I have a compulsive disorder. Whatever it's called I have too many clothes.

I do agree with another poster that this acquisition may have its roots in growing up with wearing "hand me downs" from an older brother and wearing clothes until they fell off my back.

[rocketscientist]

Barbara, at one time we did have a classified/for sale section here. The powers that be decided that it wasn't used enough and removed it. Personally, of all the stuff I have, at the time of purchase I had every intention of wearing that item. Just doesn't always happen that way. And it's not just having a particular item, it's always looking for a better item than the one you already have. Take an lbd for instance. The first one you may not be too particular about. Then you find another one that fits a little better. Then one that has sequins or ruffles or something. So on and so on. Before you know it you have many lbd's. Works the same way with every other piece in your wardrobe.

[Cheryl T]

Having too many clothes for me means I've run out of closet space and it's time to expand the house....LOL

[Adriana Moretti]

having too many clothes sounds like a GOOD problem to have.

[CherylFlint]

Shortly after we were married, my wife took control of everything, meaning if I wanted something we’d talk about it. I must say, I had quite a collection of just about everything a girl could want to start with.
Since my wife chooses what she wants me to wear, I must say she’s been very inventive in the combinations that she’s come up with over the years.
No, don’t throw anything away. I’ve purged in the past and regretted it ever since.
Oh, and you can NEVER have too many purses, or shoes, or belts, or blouses, or of anything!

[Beverley Sims]

Mmmm!

Did Imelda Marcos have too many shoes? :)

[grace7777]

If buying female clothes is not keeping you from achieving your financial goals, then I do not see a problem with it. Whether a person has to many clothes is relative, it depends on who you compare yourself to. When I first started dressing en femme I bought a lot of clothes that I did not wear, and I will probably soon be donating them to charity. Now before I buy clothes I think how will the item fit into my wardrobe, does it fulfill a need, and then picture myself wearing the item when I am out. This has stopped me from making purchases that I did not need to make.

[Erica Marie]

Well Ellie, I know you are the girl with the knowledge. Time to break out the tools and build the ultimate closet. Best is to lay it all out, try it all on and see which outfits are your favorite. See which you wear most often, then determine what to keep and what to donate. Keep your favorites close at hand and your more memorable ones can be packed away in totes for special times.
I myself wear more things daily now than I used to, so I just traded it out for my male cloths and that took care of space issues.

[Kate Simmons]

My answer: "I don't think so." :battingeyelashes::)

[CynthiaD]

I've got a Good Will bag that I place any items that fall into one of the following categories.

1. Yuck!
2. Why did I ever buy that?
3. Oh, you've got to be kidding!
4. Saving it for when I go anorexic.
5. Maybe when I was 18, but now?
6. Hmmm, forgot I had this. Wonder when I bought it?
7. Makes my boobs look flat and my tummy really fat.
8. Gee, I like this, but there's a layer of dust an inch thick on it.
9. Where would I ever wear this?
10. You know, I'm never going to find the right top (bottom) for this.
11. Wow! I must have been really fat when I bought this!

When the bag gets full, off it goes.

[BillieAnneJean]

Grace 7777 is right on the mark!

Well written.

[ReineD]

The short answer is yes, it is entirely possible to have too many clothes and shoes.

Whether or not you need help is up to you. Have you hit bottom with it yet? If you and your wife are of the same mind, it seems unlikely that you will. By this I mean that issues come to the fore more frequently when one partner is a shopper/hoarder, the other isn't and resents their partner's obsession. But if you both like to shop? Then enjoy!

Personally I think that lives are much freer overall when there isn't so much stuff weighing us down like anchors. My SO and I cannot find a home with closets large enough. So we stay in a house that is inadequate for our needs.

[daviolin]

Hi Ellie again. Just posted on you other thread, about getting old. Your life sounds like mine. My wife and I go shopping together all the time. We love it. We can even share a lot of our stuff, minus the shoes of course. We are always complaining about the volume of clothes we have accumulated. We hang on to a lot of old stuff because someday it will be vintage. I love Vintage dressing. Now to answer your questions.
1. No
2. Yes
3. Yes, Me, but I live to far away.
Daviolin

[Ellie52]

The short answer is yes, it is entirely possible to have too many clothes and shoes.

Whether or not you need help is up to you. Have you hit bottom with it yet? If you and your wife are of the same mind, it seems unlikely that you will. By this I mean that issues come to the fore more frequently when one partner is a shopper/hoarder, the other isn't and resents their partner's obsession. But if you both like to shop? Then enjoy!

Personally I think that lives are much freer overall when there isn't so much stuff weighing us down like anchors. My SO and I cannot find a home with closets large enough. So we stay in a house that is inadequate for our needs.

We both love to shop - more importantly we love to shop together. We have recently gone through our things and have a nice pile for the Salvation army.
Most of the things we are getting rid of are quite boring and we shouldnt have bought in the first place. Or we have too many copies of the same things - like black skirts....

Vintage stuff though - It aint going anywhere. Ive a nice Laura Ashley dress that I think is from the 70's and I am keeping that baby.

Ellie

[flatlander_48]

Well, if when you back you car out of the garage and the void fills back in with clothes much like after Moses parted the waters and then they rushed back, you've probably got a piece or 2 too many...

DeeAnn

[Maria Blackwood]

Too many? Wat does too many mean? :daydreaming:

I live alone in a three bedroom house. One bedroom is pretty much devoted to CD and some other... Interests. Plenty of room.

[lexivanderpump]

The short answer is no. You can't ever have enough clothes and shoes (only high heels for me). My wife buys me clothes too. I never throw anything away. NEVER.

As a matter of fact, you don't have enough. Buy more!

Love,
Lexi V.

[susan54]

Until recently I would have agreed that you cannot have too many clothes but over the last year they have been taking over my house and I have reached my limits. Even though I have got rid of a lot of older/too tight/damaged stuff I still have:

730 dresses
960 skirts
521 blouses
132 jerseys
156 cardigans
153 jackets
539 other tops
24 coats
shoes not counted but around 300 pairs

I have three large wardrobes full, the surplus is in my loft, but three rooms also have lots of clothes lying or hanging everywhere after washing and it is getting too much - the wardrobes are crammed so that my lovely outfits are crushed. I can afford all this but I really have decided to cut down on buying - and over the last couple of months I have not gone out dressed and have not bought ANYTHING. But I need to do some serious organisation at home.

[chinabrown]

Yes, because I have an entire 125 cubic foot storage full of clothing , heels,sandals,shoes, makeup and accessories.


I have more heels and sandals then anyone I can think of right now.