Close Call or Busted?!

[LexiMay]

Hello everybody!

2 days ago I was rushed into hospital due to my left lung collapsing, bad I know but what happened the night I went in has left me slightly worried but more curious!

Due to me being rushed into the hospital I hadn't picked up my phone, my sister offered to take my keys, go to my home and bring my phone to the hospital to me, which I agreed as I hate not having my phone! She came back to the hospital with a bag that had my phone, charger, toothbrush a tshirt and my GIRLY JEANS!! I'm not sure if she even realised what she had picked up but regardless of that, the jeans were kept in the same suitcase as the rest of my female clothes(although the others are in a large pocket inside the cAse) so I'm pretty sure she will have seen those too!

How do I approach this? Do I leave it until she brings it up, if she ever does? Do I bring it up, drop hints?

(Me and my sister are really close so it wouldn't be such a bad thing if she did know, I think lol!)

Lexi x

[NicoleScott]

Don't go on the defense. What's so bad about not knowing if she knows?

[Jorja]

Don't say a word about it until asked. Then, don't lie. Own it! You are well over 21 years old. Live your life the way you want too.

[LexiMay]

Don't go on the defense. What's so bad about not knowing if she knows?

Well, me and my sister are really close, she knows I'm not the most masculine of people and she's amazingly open minded and accepting so I don't feel this 'close call' is a bad thing! 😊 She's the type of girl who would teach me how to do my make up so I like the idea of her knowing lol! Im just trying to work out the best plan from here, this could be a great stepping stone.

Thanks!
Lexi x

[Victoria Demeanor]

hum Lexi, not sure how to answer this one since I don't know what your relationship is like between you and your sister. Would it be a bad thing if she knew?
In anycase, I would just tell her thank you for bringing you your stuff and let it go from there.

[Kim_Bitzflick]

After a close call like this, I think she will be happy to have you alive and with her no matter what. If you feel the need to tell her, I think now is the time.

[SandraB]

Lexi, if your only concern was that your sister may have found your clothes, then I would agree with Jorja's advice.

However, regardless of this incident, it sounds like you really want to open up to your sister and that she would be supportive. I think you should make your decision whether to disclose based on this alone.

[kimdl93]

If you're close then maybe it's the time for a conversation. You have to decide

[justmetoo]

You said you like the idea of her knowing, so why not go for it? One approach might be to tell her you want her to know in case of another emergency. Just a thought. :)

[Bria]

I'm with Jorja, let it lay until she brings it up, then be truthful!

Hugs, Bria

[sometimes_miss]

However, regardless of this incident, it sounds like you really want to open up to your sister and that she would be supportive. I think you should make your decision whether to disclose based on this alone.
I disagree. You don't know how she'll react, you don't know how much she knows. Lots of people suspend belief when in a crisis. She may just have quickly grabbed whatever she saw.
We often suffer from wishful thinking. We see someone as open minded, tolerant of alternative lifestyles, and come to the conclusion that of course they will embrace us positively. Don't forget the Not In My Back Yard affect.
Also, consider the worst possible outcome to being out, possibly ostracized by family and friends, coworkers finding out, neighbors too; do you think all of them will jump with joy over finding out you're a crossdresser? Mmmm, probably not. But some of us can deal with it. Decide if you're one of them. Remember, when a woman finds out something upsetting, the first thing they want to do is talk it over with someone, and that someone probably won't be you if you're the one she's upset over.
Tread carefully. Good luck with your decision. Oh yeah, and the collapesed lung thing. If they didn't tell you, if it happened by itself once, it's more likely to happen again, so if you feel something unusual, get it checked out.
If you can accept that, then go ahead. If not, best to leave things be and let her come to you if she wants to know.

[Leslie Langford]

Well, me and my sister are really close, she knows I'm not the most masculine of people and she's amazingly open minded and accepting so I don't feel this 'close call' is a bad thing! 😊 She's the type of girl who would teach me how to do my make up so I like the idea of her knowing lol! Im just trying to work out the best plan from here, this could be a great stepping stone...

I don't understand...if you'e as close to your sister as you claim and "...she knows I'm not the most masculine of people and she's amazingly open minded and accepting so I don't feel this 'close call' is a bad thing! 😊 She's the type of girl who would teach me how to do my make up so I like the idea of her knowing lol!..., why wouldn't you have come out to her a long time ago, and why would this current medical crisis and the risk of being "outed" in the process cause you such anguish?

[heatherdress]

Lexi - Take care of your health right now. A collapsed lung is serious. Don't worry about a pair of jeans. Your sister sounds cool. Wait to see if she notices or cares. Hope you feel OK.

[Barbara Black]

I don't know why your lung collapsed, but it is a rather serious problem. Worrying about whether you've been discovered or not seems slightly less of a concern. I agree with the others above, that your sister seems cool, especially since she may be holding back any questions, possibly because of her concern for your medical condition. I think after this I would be more determined to live my life how I wanted in light of my medical problems, and the possible consequences of it. Worrying surely isn't going to help it is it? Good luck in either of your situations.

[emma-louise]

Let your sis bring the subject up first

[carolyn todd]

Hello Lexi
How do you feel now after a couple of days rest?.
If you are worry about your sister know or not know it could be a worry to you which will not help you get better
from what you are saying she pick out a pair of your girly jean from a case with the rest of your girl clothes in
may be she (1)waiting for you to get better before asking you about the clothes in the case (2) waiting for you to talk or tell her about clothes in the case.

At the end of the day it is up to you whether you tell her or not.

GOOD LUCK
Carolyn xx

[toering63]

Don't worry about it. I just had chest pains last sunday and was admitted to the hospital. Had my toenails polished a dark green, and it was no biggie. Just concentrate on getting better.

[Marcelle]

Hi Lexi,

I agree with others . . . concentrate on getting better first then worry about how to approach this. In the interim, if your sister approaches you about your clothing (you can't be sure if she even noticed the female clothing) then deal with it. After you are better? Hmmm . . . it appears from your post that you would like a relationship with your sister as Lexi and in a way you are hoping we will point you in that direction and give you the push you need . . . nothing wrong with that BTW as we are here to support each other. The funny thing about disclosure to others is that we truly never know how it is going to go and as we do not know your sister personally, any advice we can provide is moot as we can only extrapolate how she will respond. On one side of the fence you have the . . . "You go girl. Own it and all will be well" crowd, while on the other you have the "Don't do it as it will go bad" crowd. The unfortunate thing is that is the only two possible outcomes. You need to decide where disclosure is most likely to leave your sister before making that decision.

Hugs

Isha

[JennykBailey]

Get well soon Lexi. When you are well, turn this into an opportunity to show how much you trust your sister, and want to give her the chance to be part of your life she didn't know about. Best wishes on both counts :)