CutieJulie
02-06-2006, 05:12 PM
Hello all i haven't posted in a while because I've been busy. But i do have an uplifting update for everyone. as you may or may not know a month or so I posted
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=18687
that was a letter to my family that i have recently given them and wanted you to know the results.
January 1st :
As to uphold my new years resolution, i started on the first day of the year so that there would be no excuses.
I called my sister and told her i wanted to come up for a visit. (she and her husband are hearing impaired. mentioned so that the story makes sense later on) So, I drive up there and I bring my package in with me hiding it in my coat. (contents of package and packaged in envelopes inside one big envelope: Letter<from above post modified to not mention videos> book <true selves>, and a envelope full of photos<marked open when ready>)
I visit for a little bit and just hang out then one of my favorite movies(star wars, phantom menace) comes on tv and my sisters husband starts to watch it. we watch it for a few minutes and i asked if she if she had seen it. she said she had and then i asked her if i could speak to her in the kitchen. i said. I've wanted to do this for a while now but i didn't want to interrupt anything hinting that i wanted her wedding to go smoothly she was just married in October. So I handed her the envelope. and we sat at the kitchen table and she opened it. she read the letter and i sat there shaking with excitement and feeling totally scared. This was my best friend growing up, my companion, my only friend until late high school. I started to cry. She continued to read the letter. My other childhood friend, star wars, playing in the background. Lightsabers and ewoks. mmmm good memories mixing in with the dread i am now felling. it was very surreal. very very surreal. She started to cry towards the end of the letter. My face was all wet from tears. She Put the letter down and said it's ok the tears flowing from her face as well. i jumped up as she stood up and gave her a big hug. just kept repeating it's ok it's ok. I think she was in shock. her husband still in the other room watching star wars. My sister and i crying in hugging in the the other room. Then she opened the book. then she took out the photos and went though them and commented on one of my skirts and somehow that calmed me down enough to smile again and start to relax. then we went in and told my sister's husband and he didn't quite understand. i explained it to him and he got it. and later when i went to leave him and my sister both gave me hugs. My sister said she was behind me 100% so I asked them to go with my when i told my parents because both me and my sister agreed that we had no idea of there reaction. i called my dad and mom and set up a time that i could come up and "visit" when everyone was off from work.
Whew. ok .. next step last and final step telling my family the hardest thing i will ever do after this everything is a breeze.
ok i spent the last 20 some years dreading this moment. (I'm 26 years old)
and now it has come. Will my family accept me or will the hate me forever. leave me and never speak to me again :( hey I don't know.
So the day comes... *gulp*
January 15th:
alright so i drive up to my sisters and we all drive up to my parents house. We get there and proceed to visit for a while then later after my sister gets done showing the video picture book that was made from her wedding pictures. I went to drop the bomb. everyone is sitting down on the couch. my dad was like well what does everyone want to do now want to play a game. I gulped and said i don't want to play a game but i do have something i need to do. i did this with <sister's name> and i don't know how this is gonna go but i need to do it. i walked over to my jacket where i had hidden the package. this has the same letter as before with an addition to the other things a open letter to the parents of a transsexual. I handed them the package. The started to read the letter and i stood there in from of them with my sister and her husband sitting behind me
I started to shake. About halfway through my dad said i don't believe this, <my name>. I replied it's not a joke. The whole world as silent you could have heard a pin drop. you could have heard a fly sneeze you could have cut the tension with a knife. i started to cry. my dad got done. my mom got done. and my parents said i don't believe this. they didn't believe me or they didn't want to believe me! we never saw any signs. I said that you only see what you want and of course you didn't see anything i was so careful to hide it from you. they stated that they were my parents and the would have seen something . i told them all the times i thought i had screwed up and let stuff slip. they didn't remember any of them. i sat down and cried harder and said I'm not lieing everything in that letter is true. my mom started to cry because she had thought of suicide as a kid as well. there was questions and hugs all around but it still stood that my parents don't believe me., they stated that they wanted me to seek professional help and that what ever came from that they would back me 100% even if i was a transsexual. they think it may be because i was on riddlen as a kid (yeah right) but now the next step i need to go to the doctor and get the truth.( that i already know) and then my parents will support me.
I'm happy with the response i got. it could have been worse. I still have my family and I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO happy about that.
For the last week i have been floating on cloud nine. Buzzing my chest on how happy i am. everything that was a big issue in my life before is now NOTHING i feel great and am now saving for the doctor. i will keep you all informed. the only thing everyone asked me that i wish i could have done. was why i couldn't have said something sooner. that's like asking someone to take a chance and loose everything you love.
Thanks for listening and please respond,
-Julie
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=18687
that was a letter to my family that i have recently given them and wanted you to know the results.
January 1st :
As to uphold my new years resolution, i started on the first day of the year so that there would be no excuses.
I called my sister and told her i wanted to come up for a visit. (she and her husband are hearing impaired. mentioned so that the story makes sense later on) So, I drive up there and I bring my package in with me hiding it in my coat. (contents of package and packaged in envelopes inside one big envelope: Letter<from above post modified to not mention videos> book <true selves>, and a envelope full of photos<marked open when ready>)
I visit for a little bit and just hang out then one of my favorite movies(star wars, phantom menace) comes on tv and my sisters husband starts to watch it. we watch it for a few minutes and i asked if she if she had seen it. she said she had and then i asked her if i could speak to her in the kitchen. i said. I've wanted to do this for a while now but i didn't want to interrupt anything hinting that i wanted her wedding to go smoothly she was just married in October. So I handed her the envelope. and we sat at the kitchen table and she opened it. she read the letter and i sat there shaking with excitement and feeling totally scared. This was my best friend growing up, my companion, my only friend until late high school. I started to cry. She continued to read the letter. My other childhood friend, star wars, playing in the background. Lightsabers and ewoks. mmmm good memories mixing in with the dread i am now felling. it was very surreal. very very surreal. She started to cry towards the end of the letter. My face was all wet from tears. She Put the letter down and said it's ok the tears flowing from her face as well. i jumped up as she stood up and gave her a big hug. just kept repeating it's ok it's ok. I think she was in shock. her husband still in the other room watching star wars. My sister and i crying in hugging in the the other room. Then she opened the book. then she took out the photos and went though them and commented on one of my skirts and somehow that calmed me down enough to smile again and start to relax. then we went in and told my sister's husband and he didn't quite understand. i explained it to him and he got it. and later when i went to leave him and my sister both gave me hugs. My sister said she was behind me 100% so I asked them to go with my when i told my parents because both me and my sister agreed that we had no idea of there reaction. i called my dad and mom and set up a time that i could come up and "visit" when everyone was off from work.
Whew. ok .. next step last and final step telling my family the hardest thing i will ever do after this everything is a breeze.
ok i spent the last 20 some years dreading this moment. (I'm 26 years old)
and now it has come. Will my family accept me or will the hate me forever. leave me and never speak to me again :( hey I don't know.
So the day comes... *gulp*
January 15th:
alright so i drive up to my sisters and we all drive up to my parents house. We get there and proceed to visit for a while then later after my sister gets done showing the video picture book that was made from her wedding pictures. I went to drop the bomb. everyone is sitting down on the couch. my dad was like well what does everyone want to do now want to play a game. I gulped and said i don't want to play a game but i do have something i need to do. i did this with <sister's name> and i don't know how this is gonna go but i need to do it. i walked over to my jacket where i had hidden the package. this has the same letter as before with an addition to the other things a open letter to the parents of a transsexual. I handed them the package. The started to read the letter and i stood there in from of them with my sister and her husband sitting behind me
I started to shake. About halfway through my dad said i don't believe this, <my name>. I replied it's not a joke. The whole world as silent you could have heard a pin drop. you could have heard a fly sneeze you could have cut the tension with a knife. i started to cry. my dad got done. my mom got done. and my parents said i don't believe this. they didn't believe me or they didn't want to believe me! we never saw any signs. I said that you only see what you want and of course you didn't see anything i was so careful to hide it from you. they stated that they were my parents and the would have seen something . i told them all the times i thought i had screwed up and let stuff slip. they didn't remember any of them. i sat down and cried harder and said I'm not lieing everything in that letter is true. my mom started to cry because she had thought of suicide as a kid as well. there was questions and hugs all around but it still stood that my parents don't believe me., they stated that they wanted me to seek professional help and that what ever came from that they would back me 100% even if i was a transsexual. they think it may be because i was on riddlen as a kid (yeah right) but now the next step i need to go to the doctor and get the truth.( that i already know) and then my parents will support me.
I'm happy with the response i got. it could have been worse. I still have my family and I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO happy about that.
For the last week i have been floating on cloud nine. Buzzing my chest on how happy i am. everything that was a big issue in my life before is now NOTHING i feel great and am now saving for the doctor. i will keep you all informed. the only thing everyone asked me that i wish i could have done. was why i couldn't have said something sooner. that's like asking someone to take a chance and loose everything you love.
Thanks for listening and please respond,
-Julie