Just a matter of time and I will be "outted"

[jessbcuzz]

Well, I was engaged in a shocking converstion last night at work. To make it short for on here, one of the girls from work informed me that her boyfriend and her moved into a new trailer. That trailer just so happens to be 3 down from me. She said she thought she's seen me take out trash and stuff. Most of the time, I take the trash out and check the mail at night when I get up. Every now and then, I will do all of that stuff while dressed. I am concered that it will be a matter of time that I will be doing it at the wrong time and she will notice. What to do, what to do!

[Meag]

I have done the same thing, take the trash out or get the mail wearing a mini demuim skirt, at a distance it looks like I am wearing short shorts. Some day I will be caught, too.

Meag

[TGMarla]

Well, you could stop taking out the trash and checking the mail while dressed......just a thought.

[Jodie_Lynn]

I agree with TGMarla: If you continue to go out dressed, knowing that your co-worker may see you, it is because you want her to find out.

No shame in it, but you can't then later claim how "she" ruined your career by spreading the word at your job. You are the one who will have to live with the consequences of your own actions.

Just a thought.

[jessbcuzz]

It's not just those things. I have been thinking about it, and even just getting into my car to go for a drive might subject myself to being exposed. What a dilema. At least I was told that she now lives up the road. Things could be much worse not knowing that I need to watch myself.

[Noel Chimes]

just another suggestion: if she asks about the lady she saw picking up your mail, you can tell her that it was a gf or a sister who comes by.:redface: Actually it's none of her business who comes and goes. However by having a ready supply of responses does make it easier to get out of those tight situtations. The best possible senerio would be that your neighbor and friend would be an understanding couple and accept you exactally as you are.:gh: ( But we don't live at Walgreen's. We just shop there)

[Sharon]

If you're doing this at night, and in the dark, then the chances of you being seen are slim. I mean, how many times do you peer out through your shades to study every shadowy figure that walks outside? If you're still worried, then just throw a coat over yourself and keep moving.

[MsJanessa]

Well, you could stop taking out the trash and checking the mail while dressed......just a thought.
Or you could just smile and wave when you see her----do you think it would cause problems at work---then change to a nice pair of sweat pants---if you dont think it would cause problems or don't care if she or anybody else knows, why worry?

[Helen MC]

I have to sympathise. There you were, happy in your trailer, bothering nobody else when of all the places in the vast USA a co-worker has to move in too near to you. :mad:

The only alternatives I can see , and none of these are easy, are to

a Move to another trailer park
b Change Jobs
c Curtail your dressing activities outside of your trailer.

It is a great shame that bad luck has forced this on you, but I'm afraid that is how it happens. I am luckier in that I don't dress en-femme outdoors , but wear panties 24/7 under my male trousers and these aren't seen by anyone else, my dressing up activities are strictly behind closed doors. Also I live in an appartment in what you would call a Condominium and here in the Home Counties of England (near London) people are insular, as I am myself, keep themselves by themselves, do not poke their noses into others private lives. I have been 10 years in this house but have never been inside the homes of any of my neighbours nor they into mine, and I do not socialise out of the work environment with any of my co-workers, many of whom live a long way from the place of work. So my privacy is intact.

Sorry I can't find an easy solution to your problems, but I honestly cannot think of any.

[Rachel Ann]

I try to "keep it low" in my immediate neighborhood. But, as my therapist pointed out, I am bound to run in to somebody I know someday.

One day my neighbor knocked on the door - a small matter (misdelivered mail). I threw on my boy bathrobe before answering, but after she left I realized that I had on my pink slippers that showed my painted toenails! :p

You can take all the precautions that you would like, but at the end of the day you must decide whether you are out, or not. I am sorry if this sounds harsh, but I think that it is reality.

Love, and good luck

Rachel xxx

[Cathy Anderson]

I agree with TGMarla: If you continue to go out dressed, knowing that your co-worker may see you, it is because you want her to find out.
Sorry, but I pretty much agree with Jodie here.

IMHO you're showing a lot of conflict in your own attitude towards your crossdressing, and this is showup up as concerns about being outed. Part of you feels guilty, and that is making it hard for you to see things objectively.

If you look at things logically, there are simple solutions. Maybe you should try harder to find a place you can go en femme--and dress there. Or dress in the car. But don't go to your mail box if your neighbors can see you and if you don't want them to see you.

Ask yourself: why do you feel the need to do this? What do you really hope to gain? What do you actually gain? How could you get the same thing some other way?

Cathy

[Imogen_Mann]

Am I missing something here ? Trailer ? right you live in a trailer ? I'm assuming thats the same as a "mobile" home here in the UK ie, semi fixed but on wheels ? so... is it not possible to move it ? A friend of mine lived in one, he fell out with his neighbour and so he just hitched up one weekend and shifted his self to another part of the trailer park.

That's what I'd do.

XX

Jayme

[GypsyKaren]

If they ask who the lady is say it's a friend, if they press it tell them it's none of their business.

GypsyKaren

[Helen MC]

The problem is that in many Mobile Home parks, similar to Trailer parks in the UK, the trailers are plumbed and wired in and cannot easily be moved. They are closer to the old prefabs of bygone times, a cheap solution to the housing needs of those who cannot afford the cost of a bricks and mortar house. The other problem is that some site managements / freeholders are very strict and would turf the occupant of a mobile home or trailer off the site if they tried to move it. Also moving on the same site would draw attention.

I honestly cannot think of any easy solution to this. Hopefully these newcomers may move on soon to another location or perhaps the woman will leave that employer and restore the status quo for Dark Browneyes.

[jessbcuzz]

Unfortunetly, moving my home is out of the question, at least at this point. The mobile home park I live in requires a lease, and that is not up until the end of next year. Also, it's very expensive and hard to find a place. I've been wanting to save for a piece of land to put it on. I can't switch jobs either. It's one of the best paying company around here. After thinking about it last night at work, I think the reason I am so agitated is that I have come along ways within the past two years in regards to accpeting who I am, and not to be ashamed. Like yesterday, for the first time in daylight, I ran my earrands in a matching bra and boyshort, women's jeans, a women shirt, womens socks, and I even broke out the pair of all white cheerleading shoe that has never touched anything but carpet. I even said to heck with it and inserted my gel breasts. I wear a baggy coat, so nothing was noticeable. I didn't do the wig or anything else like that, but two years ago, I wouldn't have even dared think about doing something like this. I've made quite a bit of progress, and it is about to or very well could come to a sudden and abrut halt. All because by random chance, a co-worker that I know very well on another shift now live 3 lots or so away from me.
Yes, part of me wishes I'd get caught, so that I won't have to hide or wonder if anyone can read me and what I do. The consenquences could be dire, and I think that is what is the scariest. My fiancee knows that I dress, and is supportive, but other than on other person at work and two outside of work know about Mileena. I live in a very small town. The type where everyone is related to everyone. Both of my parents are teachers here, so almost everyone knows my mom and dad. So, if and when I am outed, everyone will know.
I know that it's been suggested that I stay within the confines of my home. For those that have made that point, is that what you would do if you were in my heels? I don't think I have many options, and with what is available, there doesn't seem to be a compromise.
One option that has been suggested, that I was thining about earlier, is what if I corner her and explain to her. I am wondering if that would be a better route. The reason being is so that it won't come as a complete shock if she were to ever notice. Maybe she'd be "ok" with it and help me with pointers. Maybe this is a bad idea. I don't know. What to do, what to do

[Julia Cross]

I think the answer is clear. Ultimately whatever choice you make has consequences. Should you go out dressed, you risk being seen. Should you choose to stop going out dressed, you compromise who you are. Only you know which of the two is more difficult to accept.

You said you finally came to accept who you are and are not ashamed about dressing, yet you dress fully, gels included and cover it all up with a loose fitting coat. It doesn't sound like you are fully accepting of who you are, simply moe brave about risking a public appearance.

I think you need to determine how important dressing is to you and your personal relationships, determine how the knowledge of it to others will effect your life and based on that decide how far you are willing to take this.

J

[uknowhoo]

Mileena, I'm so sorry to hear of your situation. It would seem there are no great options. Hopefully there may be acceptable options though. One big positive you have going for you is your fiancee's acceptance. Perhaps you should consider talking to your folks about it before they hear of it elsewhere. As for your co-worker, I wouldn't tell her just because she moved in close-by. Is she (and is her boyfriend) someone you would trust enough to confide in (the neighbor aspect notwithstanding)?

Good luck hon,

Tammi

[paulaN]

I too live in a small town. 4000 people of so. I know how you feel about beeing outed. I think you should cool it for a wile about going outside. keep an eye on what goes on over their when thay come and go ect. ect. then you may find some times are safer than others to go and get your mail. how doe that saying go, If your not living life on the edge then you're taking up too much space. don't fret just yet. oh ya I also like the idea about having responces ready.

[Rachel Ann]

Maybe she'd be "ok" with it and help me with pointers. Maybe this is a bad idea. I don't know. What to do, what to do
Well, I don't know her, but it seems to me that the potential downside to that is a lot bigger thany any possible upside. If it backfired, you would really be in the soup.

I also have to maintain stealth coming and going from my apartment, and in the immediate neighborhood. I have an ankle-length hooded coat that does a decent job of concealing what I am wearing. When the weather is too nice for that, I have found that I can conceal girl clothes under baggy jeans and a loose sweatshirt (or any oversized long-sleeved pullover). If your dress/skirt won't fit under the jeans, pull it up over your waist and under the shirt. I wait until I get where I'm going to put on wig, lipstick and girl shoes. Other makeup isn't that noticeable from a distance, and who ever looks at your socks?

Hope this helps

Rachel xx