13th Anniversary

[Suzanne F]

I am sitting here having coffee in a hotel room on the ocean in Northern California, just south of San Francisco. My beautiful wife is here with me celebrating our anniversary. What a miracle! We have been through a fantastic and difficult journey over the last 2 years.

I want to treasure this moment because I know it could go away without notice. We both talked about wanting to be together but not knowing what the future held last night. It was a sweet and honest sharing about a quickly changing life. I am so lucky even if it ended tomorrow. I know now that I can transition in peace because she understands I have no choice, she knows the real me. Isn't that what I always wanted, to really have someone know and love me!

Yes staying married is a long shot. I understand why. What ever happens I know that we have tried. My wife wants to write a book about the process. I think it would be good for her. I am so proud of her! How did two girls who grew up in difficult circumstances in Kentucky end up with a beautiful life in California?

Suzanne

[barbaraclothes]

Congratulations to both of you....

[Nigella]

With such a strong bond, there is every chance that the relationship will survive. It is good that you both understand the difficulties ahead.

I wish you both a happy anniversary and hope there are many, many more to come :hugs:

[PretzelGirl]

Communication and understanding of the other's situation is the start. Then it is up to what makes up each of the two people. You have given it a chance. I hope it works out well for you. Happy Anniversary!

[Eringirl]

Wonderful anecdote...thanks for sharing Suzanne!! Happy Anniversary to you both and here is to many more!

Erin

[kimdl93]

I sincerely hop that there is a path forward that the two of you can share.

[PaulaQ]

At the point the two of you are at, I think your chances are much, much higher than usual of staying together, and I hope of finding happiness together. If I could offer you both some advice, for what it's worth, I would hope the two of you could be flexible in your views about how the relationship can work going forward, because as you point out, you aren't in Kentucky anymore...

[Marcelle]

Hi Suzanne,

Happy Anniversary. I think that given your bond with your lovely wife it is plausible that you could stay together but I am also gladdened to read that it transcends in your own thinking that should things go awry, you have come to a peaceful place and are prepared to move forward. In the meantime, share each other's love and just be the happy couple you are.

Cheers

Isha

[Jorja]

Happy Anniversary, Suzanne! May there be many more to come.

[I Am Paula]

Happy anniversary. Thanks for the inspiring post.

[Leah Lynn]

Happy anniversary! I also hope you have many more.

Hugs,

Leah

[AllieSF]

Happy Anniversary to a wonderful couple!

[Suzanne F]

Here we were at dinner!

[charlenesomeone]

A lovely couple, Happy Anniversary and all the best to you both.

[Starling]

Sweet photo, Suzanne. Happy Anniversary!

:) Lallie

[Sandra]

Happy anniversary you both look very relaxed in the pic :)

Hopefully with being open and your wife understanding and both of you talking through things, you will many more anniversaries to celebrate.

[kiwidownunder]

Happy Anniversary You both look amazing!

[steftoday]

Happy Anniversary! The picture of you two is awesome!

[Erika Lyne]

Suzanne,

Wow! If that's the prologue, I'm buying a hard cover copy and would love to have it signed by the author and her inspiration.

"Happy Anniversary" just doesn't seem right. Does it? It seems too naïve (I'm not trying to insult anyone. I am trying to convey my support for this relationship in flux.). To say "Happy Anniversary" would tend to lean towards you not reaching your own fulfillment or for your wife being forced to be unhappy if you had. I read the OP and honestly had to choke back a tear. To say that you two love eachother is an understatement. You obviously do. That is the most beautiful thing that could be shared. But the honesty, the pain and the epiphany of realizing that an end to the formal legal relationship may very well be on the near horizon and to both walk towards it together, knowingly and peacefully supporting one another is an astounding feat of love.

My relationship with my wife has a similar undertone. She has stated if I were to transition she would support me but could not stay married to me. She also wrongfully blames herself for many of my gender identity pains. Maybe that is why this post hit me so hard.

Rather than " Happy Anniversary. ". I'll say, "Happy Horizons." This, to me, sounds less naïve to say to a couple who share a love that cannot remain formal but is so deeply rooted into a relationship that the bond can never and will never be severed.

To the two of you,

Happy Horizons

Love,
-Erika

[chelyann]

Happy Anniversary
you to look amazing
good luck