Houston we have a problem.

[thisgal16]

So about a month ago, I went out to a local meetup group meet and since then I have had zero interest in dressing or doing anything femme. I thought the lack of feeling would pass but it hasn't and it seems to only be getting worst, to the point that I'm considering getting rid of everything. I'm completely lost and don't know what to do. I know I don't post here often but any advise would be greatly appreciated.

[Robin414]

Hmm, is it really a problem? I know I gave up cold turkey about 20 yrs ago and didn't think about it at all until about a year ago when the pink fog rolled in, and turned into a full blown hurricane! If you WANT to feel femme and we're maybe discouraged by the meeting try checking out you tube for some inspiration, I like Denver Williams myself for the cd angle!😃

[Badwolf]

My advice is that if you can figure out how to do it, don't purge. Especially if you have nice things. Replacing them will be a pain later.

Either way long periods of time without dressing should be just fine for a run of the mill Cross Dresser. What do you think is causing you anxiety about not dressing?

[AngelaYVR]

What sort of group was it? If it was the stereotypical misery session that some groups are known for then try a good dose of something fun while dressed.
What always interests me is that when we read stories like yours, there is always a tone of sadness. You don't sound happy to lose your mojo so just sit tight for a bit and look at shoes online (always gets my girl side purring).

[AutumnCD]

I have the same types of feelings. The willingness to dress seems to come and go. Unless it's necessary, I wouldn't get rid of your clothing. If and when the feeling comes back, you will be relieved that you kept everything.

[Jorja]

I would suggest that you pack it all away and place it somewhere out of the way for now. When the urge comes back, and it will, you will have everything.

[Bridget Ann Gilbert]

I agree you shouldn't purge, but don't try to over analyze yourself. If you don't feel the need to dress then don't force yourself. The feelings will come back eventually, they always do. Part of being a CD is accepting yourself in all circumstances.

Bridget

[VanTG]

I would follow what Jorja says, and just put it away for the time being. You never know the feelings might be suppressed right because of some shame or something like that. Keep it or you might be posting in a month saying you regret it.

You are still on this site so there are is obviously something still there.

[Tracii G]

Yes pack it up and save it for later.
Remember we all go thru times where dressing isn't what we want to do.
There is middle ground just find the balance point.

[pamela7]

i had a similar reaction to one group i attended. don't purge, you just didn't find the right group or environment.

[Marcelle]

Hi there,

This seems to be a common theme for many . . . urge disappears . . . tempt to purge . . . urge comes back. I would take the sage of advice of many here . . . don't purge but pack away (the desire to purge is your own sense of shame). Store your stuff and go on with your guy life. It is most likely the urge will return with a vengeance and if you purge, you'll have nothing to deal with that urge not to mention it will be expensive.

Cheers

Isha

[Zylia]

Isn't it lovely how, in this bizarro crossdressing world, the loss of interest in crossdressing is considered 'just a phase'? :D They're right though: we all have a strong pro-CD bias, but it probably will come back. Don't purge.

[Claire Cook]

Hi,

Reading your post it's not clear whether it was the meetup session or the act of CD'ing that put you off. Maybe it doesn't matter. I'm sounding like a broken record, but most if not all of us have gone through similar periods. There probably have been a few of us who have gone "cold turkey" and never looked back, but I'll bet they are in the (vast?) minority. My purge period lasted for 20 years at least ... after which time my old clothes would not have fit anyway (and they certainly would have been out of style)! But when the pink Fog came back, it was here to stay.

There certainly is nothing wrong in saying "This is not for me", and it's your call. Good luck whichever way you decide.

Hugs, Claire

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Jenn, Crossdressing is like the Mafia, You just can't quit.:devil:

Store your things because you WILL be back.:hugs:

[Belle Cri]

Hi Jenn, Crossdressing is like the Mafia, You just can't quit.:devil:



Lol, can I steal that please?

[kimdl93]

It's only a problem if you make it one. Many of us have had long period of low interest. It seems always to return.

[JeanetteX]

Haha very good one Blue Orchid....but at the same time so true!!!

Conclusion....don't purge, but store

[stacy956]

I would suggest to put all your stuff in a box and you will it will be back and even more than ever😛

[Krisi]

There's no law that says once you start crossdressing you have to continue. If you don't feel like crossdressing, don't.

Getting rid of everything is entirely your choice. If it's valuable and you have a place to store it, that may be wise in case you wish to start dressing again. If not, toss it (donate it to charity) and don't look back.

[NicoleScott]

Store your clothes, don't purge. You might want to change your avatar, but only temporarily. The desire will come back to you eventually. If not, you're not a crossdresser.

[Pat]

As people are advising, store your stuff. Then relax. Don't feel guilty or that you "should" be dressing. If you don't feel like it, then you shouldn't be. And consider why you might have stopped -- did the group's reality conflict with your inner vision of yourself? Did you feel pressure to go further than you were willing to? Was it just not a personality match? You could be suffering a "mental concussion" from meeting the others. There's a high probability that it will pass. Give it time; give yourself space. The most important thing we have to allow ourselves is forgiveness. ;)

[msniki48]

Jennifer

My therapist told me [ when I was not dressing ] When you need her, she will be there... when you don't, don't worry about her. you are being yourself either way.

don't feel the need to throw it all away... unless you have money to burn, as she will come back again and tap you on the shoulder.

hugs

niki

[Jorja]

as she will come back again and tap you on the shoulder.niki

Or smack you upside the head with a baseball bat. ;)

[Beverley Sims]

A plastic bag and mothballs can be a girls best friend. :)

[Alice_2014_B]

I kind of went through the same thing back in April.
I went to a couple of places by myself dressed up (Post Office and Fred Meyers. See link below for the story.)
Nothing bad happened at all; I really enjoyed it. It was not my first time out by myself, but it was the first since my new look. I felt way better and way more passable than recent trips out.
Then after that I just went on a hiatus. The only things I purged were pictures. I only recently retrieved many off of my phone. I did not purge any clothes or heels.
:)

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?229768-A-Good-Scary-(wife-s-reaction-how-old-net)&highlight=

[Sissy_Michelle]

Thisgal16

Why throw it away? Why not put all your clothes in a box. Then put the box away. That way when you want to dress again you don't have to spend more money on the same clothes.

@--}----

[Piora]

I agree with the rest of the girls on here. DON'T PURGE YOUR CLOTHING! Suggest you pack it all away for now. The exact same thing happened to me. I was going through a separation and could think of nothing else at that time. But, I made the mistake of throwing out my stuff. It still makes me want to cry when I think about it....I had some beautiful things. But for 6 years after I moved out, I never dressed, never even thought about it, or had a desire to buy more. Then one day, it just came back like an express train. It was the strangest thing. I have no idea what triggered it. But, of course, I had to buy all new stuff. Since that day, I have had short lapses, but I soon get the urge again.

From what I've read, this is quite common with crossdressers.

[audreyinalbany]

Happens to me all the time…..I get a chance to have a girls weekend away, dress for a couple of days and have fun, then the urge kind of disappears for a month or so. I guess I kind of 'get it out of my system." Don't beat yourself up…the desire will come back so keep your stuff !

[Carmen]

[QUOTE=Alice_2014_B;3780110]I kind of went through the same thing back in April.QUOTE]

Perhaps it was a solar flare or spring fever...but in April something inside me 'clicked' off and I suddenly had no interest.
I was away from home for 4 days with plans of spending them fulltime. However, I suddenly became detached. I just wasn't interested.
This really got my attention. I was sure that I would no longer dress. It was over.

I was tempted, but I didn't purge, I knew better. At that time I was dealing with several issues.
Fast forward to today. I'm still here and planning for 3 days away...en femme.
And looking forward to it.

[ShelbyDawn]

I agree with the general theme... Don't purge!
But if you do just think of all the fun you will have shopping for new stuff when the urge comes back. :)

[Heelios]

I have purged more times than I can remember, gone for months, weeks or sometimes just days before I have a crushing urge to replace everything I got rid of. Urges come and go so there is no point in purging plus it gets extremely expensive. If after sometime you feel you really aren't into it anymore then sell everything on or give it all to charity.

[CynthiaD]

There are times when I don't feel much like dressing, but I often force myself to do so anyway. I'm always glad I did. But that's just me. Do what you feel is best for you.